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After a couple months here I think I have a better grasp on how to convey what I am seeking here.
I don’t have, in the conventional sense, a submissive nature anymore. The past few years I have found a few things that are empowering and that I will simply not give up. I want to experience some aspects of BDSM in order to grow as a person by understanding myself a little better.
There are situations that I crave, fantasize and fear; Bondage in itself, while exhilarating can be quite scary. I am hoping that the right partner can help me navigate this in a safe manner.
Most people I know socially and professionally don't know about my genetic birth, which is why I am not posting pictures of my face here. When the time is right you can see my face.
Let me establish the basics;
- Respect and trust; Corner stones of healthy interaction, without these, no go!
- My submission is earned, not given. You earn it with the above.
- I am not a true submissive, I have quite a strong will, and if you want a pushover that will mop your floor in stilettos and give you sexual favors because you snapped your fingers, look elsewhere.
- I will probably never mop your floor, just so we are clear :)
- I am switch, However, I prefer a submissive role but seldom will find a girl who will pique my interest and I may wish to be the Domme.
- I don’t Dom guys, EVER.
What I am NOT looking for:
- I am not looking for just sex, I get that at home! Yes, I am in a relationship but my bf is aware of my extra-curricular activities. I am pretty sure the prospect of a threesome with another girl is why he is so cool about this.
- Don't send me pictures of you junk, seriously, a webcam a porn-star does NOT make you, not into cyber either
- 3 line emails with "ho horny male for cyborrz" get you nowhere, same goes for your copy and paste internet dating stationary about how awesome you are and how big your junk is.
- I am not looking to be a slave, (if I don’t call my parents sir and ma’am, what chance do you have outside of a scene), a collar is just something I wear as an accessory, I will never be 24/7 sex toy, not gonna happen.
- If you are looking for a close encounter of the trans type by passing yourself off as Dom, gtfo!I have already been through that enough times that by now and it is absolutely annoying to find some dude who thinks/claims he is a Dom because he has a pair of fuzzy hand cuffs.
I am here because I find some parts of BDSM fascinating in a psychological level and to be perfectly honest quite enjoyable. Lately I have been rediscovering myself, and this is something I tend to put on the side because I am simply not submissive in nature but rather wild. I guess now I want to experiment with this again as much as possible without disrupting my life.
I am looking for people to talk to first and see what develops from there.
For myself, I am looking for a Dom or Domme that will not “insert cliché here” but will help me grow. Being bound and giving up control is something that both intrigues me and terrifies me at the same time.
From my past experiences I have realized that I tend to be topping from the bottom and that no one has really taken me to a state of mind of utter helplessness which is where I want to go I think. I was disappointed when I have either escaped my bonds, realized that I was manipulating the situation, the person had not one clue about what they where doing, etc.
As for switching, I only do it with girls; I tend to be more hetero so it is few and far between when I meet someone I want to dominate.
If you have questions, comments, concerns, ask away.
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