I am a strong woman and I believe women are the core, heart, and strength of the family. I feel a man who has found his calling by being of service to his Mistress is brave to be true to himself.
I am not looking for a sub at this time.
Lady Oddsworth (extra points if you can name the statue in my photos)
WARNING: Any institutions using this site or any of its associated sites for studies or projects of any kind - You do NOT have my permission to use any of my profile or pictures in any form or forum both current and future. If you have or do so, it will be considered a serious violation of my privacy and will be subject to legal ramifications. It is recommended that other members post a similar notice to this.
All of our relationships teach us something. This last one showed me that overall I am really a positive person. I want a partner who is; smart, funny, outgoing, and who really really loves being on the planet. Life is to short to be or spend time with miserable people.
A friend told a few years back that the older you get the pickier you are about who you spend your time with, I get it.
B O R I N G . . .
I will never understand men.
Enough rain already.
CNN just reported that the death toll due to the quake and Tsunami thus far is;
763, dead
639, missing
1419, injured
Considering the size of the quake and Tsunamis, that number is amazingly low. Not to detract from those suffering, but Kudo's to the country of Japan for building such seismicly adaptive buildings.
Now how many will die due to radiation from the nuclear meltdowns that may be unavoidable?
Apparently there is a chance of snow in San Francisco ... hasn't snowed here since Feb, 5 1976. Looking forward to it. The sky was slushing last Fri night.
Yawn
Opinions,
Do you prefer romance right off the bat?
Or to have friendship that turns into romance?
A thought ......
Do Vegans swallow cum?
Met with a sub today for coffee. He said my photos don't do me justice. That was nice.
I like today's date
I need a good laugh. Please send me your best joke.
I saw the most interesting chastity device on a profile earlier today.
He was pierced with a ring through his urethra and out just below the rim of the glans. He also had a ring through his ball sack, and the two were locked together all neat and tidy with a pad lock. I like it, simple, clean, and it inhibits erection and makes sex impossible. No clunky cages.
HAPPY NEW YEAR!!!
Boring
Some yahoo hit me in the mall parking lot. He wanted a parking spot and neglected to check his rearview mirror before backing up to get it. He hit me pretty hard. My emergency flashers came on, and I couldn't get them to turn off, only bumper contact so no damage. So glad it wasn't hard enough to deploy the airbags.
Men drivers ...
We went to see a very small ballet companies rendition of the Nutcracker last weekend. We are going to go to the company we always see tomorrow, The Peninsula Ballet. They do a wonderful Nutcracker and have a live orchastra. and... I've been watching the battle of the Nutcracker on demand It has some of the finest ballet companies in the world i.e. The Royal Ballet and the Ballet of Monte Carlo and the Bolshoi Ballet Co. So far, of the three I am enjoying the Royal Ballet the best. It is a more traditional Nutcracker.
Cannot get enough Tchaikovsky
I am shocked at the seemingly low intelligence quotient of many of the male subs on here. Do you really expect to be taken seriously, or under consideration, when you cannot follow the simplest of instructions on a Domme's profile?
New job dealing with the mentally ill. My one friend keeps reminding me of how great it is to have been hired at a job that is actually related to my degree. I like it, but it wipes me out, I am totally beat at night.
I think it's getting to the point Where I can be myself again I think it's getting to the point Where we have almost made amends I think it's the getting to the point That is the hardest part.
And if you call, I will answer And if you fall, I'll pick you up And if you court this disaster Ill point you home
You think I only think about you When were both in the same room You think Im only here to witness The remains of love exhumed You think were here to play A game of who loves more than whom
And if you call, I will answer And if you fall, I'll pick you up And if you court this disaster Ill point you home
You think it's only fair to do what's Best for you and you alone You think it's only fair to do the same To me when you're not home I think it's time to make this something that is More than only fair
So if you call, I will answer And if you fall, I'll pick you up And if you court this disaster Ill point you home.
But Im warning you, don't ever do Those crazy, messed up things that you do If you ever do I promise you I'll be the first to crucity you Now it's time to prove that youve come back Here to rebuild.
Having better luck in subville.
A very cold storm is on the way. They say thunder storms ... For those of you who do not know California or the San Francisco Bay Area, we do not get many thunder storms here. Now you will understand my reaction ... YIPPEE!!
HAPPY BIRTHDAY MOM! I MISS YOU.
----------------------------------
So I'm at the grocery store this morning and the man in line in front of me looked at my shirt, well actually he looked at my breasts ... and sees my T-shirt says St. Pauli Inn. He askes me;
"Is that the one on Hwy 50?" "Yes!" I say, "They have good German Food." So then he tells me it closed last year ... bummer
It was such a cute place nestled in the woods in Pollock Pines, next to a stream. So for any other fans of St. Pauli, it's gone. Darn economy.
Today I did the walk I used to do daily, lovely weather, felt great! Didn't see any deer though you cannot fling a deceased feline without hitting a PG&E worker. Since the pipeline explosion they have been tearing up the area. I've never seen so many trucks, pipes and piles of dirt.
Followed by a breakfast of; cut up peppered cantaloupe with blueberries and pomegranate seeds. (Yes, fresh ground pepper on cantaloupe is wonderful). With a veggie, eggwhite frittata
Trivia .... Did you know that human breast milk taste like cantaloupe juice?
Hazah!! What wonders hold the weather today. If for not the turning leaves, one would think it Spring!!
Feels not of fall. Alas, rain is on the forefront.
Very excited about this new sub I am talking to. We seem to really be on the same page, so far, How refreshing! We have yet to meet and that will be the big test, wont it? ... the chemistry HAS to be there or, well I don't want to think about the or right now.
Went to the de Young Museum in Golden Gate park today to see the impressionist exhibit. WOW, Monet, Van Gogh, Renoir ... Some of it was just so beautiful. The colors and combinations of colors used. A couple stick out in my mind. There were a lot of people there so you are not able to spend a lot of time in front of any one painting. The Titanic and Tut exhibits were there too. They get some nice ones that come through.
MMMM, Good Coffee!!
Il dolce far niente!!
Took a bike ride today. My goal? Ride to the Lunardi's, get some milk, put it into my backpack, and ride home.
I would ride on the street for a bit then hit the trail I used to walk daily, so I know it well ... the only thing is, I didn't realize it was almost all down hill on the way there. I knew I would be in a world of hurt on the way home, so I aborted my mission. 2/3 of the way there I decided to come home, good thing too. Uphill almost all the way back baby, I thought I would DIE. OMG! I am in such shitty shape right now. My legs feel like jello. I think my little milk mission will be my ongoing goal. Gotta do it!
Had a very busy weekend.
Coffee meetings, being with friends, dinner at my sisters.. spending the night at my friends house (who lives next door to my sister).. My sis had over night company already so K offered to let me stay instead of driving home...
K's house is beautiful, 3000 sq feet in the mountains.. interesting design, no right angles anywhere in the house.. 3 levels.. I was on the bottom level in what could be an in-law unit. K was on the top floor. I heard her get up and go into the kitchen at 3:30 which was above my room. at 3:30 she heard me walk down her hall on the top floor, thinking I got lost and go down into the kitchen.. she even called out to me. The thing is, neither of us was up.... scary. Come to find out.. she "hears" a lot of things. It's haunted.
Recently started talking to a sub that is promising... We'll see
Yet another sub totally blew it with me.
Sick of you boys.
I'm a firm believer that when you are driving and you see that "everyone" on the road is driving badly or slowly, that it's probably you not them.
However, I swear I've had my share of crazy lately. Seems like I've been exposed to more than enough, confused, and or unstable people the past week or so.
An older woman friend of mine told me the older you get the less BS you are willing to put up with, perhaps my bullshit threshold is vanishing..
I was wrong, and I admit it. I said the Giant's would take the series in 6 games, my mistake ...
Did you Brits enjoy the 49er's??
Giants Baby ...
HAPPY HALLOWEEN!!
At 2:00 it was already standing room only at the sports bar near me. Can't wait for the game to start.
I think the Giants did pretty well tonight. Young players, in love with the game, pretty great stuff.
They remind me of the Oakland A's way back when they had Catfish Hunter, Vida Blue and Reggie Jackson. Now that was some fun baseball to watch.
I went to a local sports bar I've gone to for lunch to watch the second half of the game, ran into someone I know, had a great time ... Standing room only, yelling, twirling orange towels.
GIANTS WIN!!
GIANTS WIN!!
Had a super bad day. I hope the Giants WIN!
GIANTS WIN!!!! World Series BABY!!!
I am bored ...
Rain storm heading in, yippee!!
Did a 2 mile hike early this morning, then at work we needed to move some things and I did the 3 flights of stairs probably a dozen times. Feel fine now but wonder if my gluteus maximus will hurt tomorrow ...
The sun never says to the earth, "You owe me!"
Just think about what a love like that can do.
-The Shift
I love some of these photos the male subbies post. Cock all caged or in panties or some other compromising position, and you just know they were home alone and did all of this to themselves and are using the tripod and camera timer.
I don't understand all of the subs who are willing to relocate.
Stating you are willing to relocate in the first or second communication is, well, for lack of a better word, nuts!
I would have to actually really know the guy and be head over heels to even consider the idea. I think in rare cases that may be something that could possibly work out, more than likely not.
I don't want the responsibility of having to be "everything" to a man who has left his friends, family, and job to be with me.
I prefer to look locally. I say in my profile very clearly that I am not interested in having a sub/slave relocate, not interested, yet I get the offers.
The guy I work for actually met his wife through Craigslist personals, imagine that!!
People keep saying "as soon as you stop looking ..." Well, I feel like I did stop looking a while back. I love to window shop, just because you are looking through the window doesn't mean you are ready to buy. Men contact me, but unless there is something really special about them. Na, just to tired of it. Window shopping is fun, I enjoy it. I love the male form.
My job is still weird, less hours than I really want. Please send good juju my way toward finding a new gig ... thanks
I love the fact that I can have dinner parties now.
Tonight I had my friend and her parents (who are out from the Baltimore area) over for dinner.
To start; Merlot Hummus w melba toasts mixed nuts deviled eggs
Jerk marinated, garlic infused tri tip roast loaded mashed potatoes asparagus cesaer salad
red velvet cake coffee
It was a smashing success!
In a world filled to the brim with wonderful men, why am I not dating?
Just hung some Halloween lights, yep I LOVE HALLOWEEN!!
I love a good civilized cup of tea.
When it comes to seeing someone much younger ...
I myself feel weird if "he" is a lot younger. The youngest I have seen was 38. I had a vanilla with a man 22 years older than I am, that worked out fine while it lasted. I guess it all depends. I want whomever I spend time with to understand what I mean when I sing the song "Feelings", or if I talk about the space shuttle Challenger ... and not look at me with his head cocked like a dog who's water dish was just moved.
Not that I sing "Feelings" but you get the idea ...
It's to bloody hot!
Had a first meeting with a vanilla guy this evening. He said I look better than my photos. That was nice but it went down hill from there. He kept saying really weird things. Not a good sign when a man makes your skin crawl.
Men continue to baffle me.
Just thinking about all the seniors I worked with on the temp job. I miss so many of them. Hope they are well.
I love my apartment. I am having my first dinner party in a couple of weeks. Having my family over for my sisters birthday dinner.. Hmmm, what shall I make? I think cheesecake is in order for dessert.
My dear friend, gave me a diningroom set. She bought it in 1974 and since then; she used it, her ex-husband had it for a while, then her son had it, after that her daughter, then her daughter's Mother in law had it for a short time, then back to the daughter. (wow long sentence) Anyway, she said she wanted to keep it in the family and gave it to me. (hand over my heart) How sweet is that!
I will not chase.
Oh the stories I've heard from the gas pipe explosion are incredible.
One woman I met who's house burned to the ground told me about how when they heard the explosion and saw the 200 foot gas fueled torch like fireball; she ran around the side of her house to get into her car. The car was to hot to touch, so she escaped in their other car. She told me how grateful she was that her children "can run fast" That broke my heart. A reporter approached her while we were at the Red Cross station. The reporter said to her "You must think I'm stalking you" funny she would say that. My good friend who's family was evacuated and is staying with me was approached by another reporter, when asked if she lost her house (thank God she did not) she told the reporter "no" the reporter just turned and walked away, apparently not exciting enough. Not getting the story about how her 13 year old who was home alone with the 11 and 7 year olds got her shoeless siblings out of the house and told them to run up the street. That first woman who lost her house also told me when she opened her front door see saw a young man standing there, skin hanging off of his scorched body, he looked at her and said "I just saw my girlfriend burn to death"
Another friend of my who lives in the blast zone and is displaced, told me how they were sitting down to dinner when they heard the blast. They saw and felt the intense heat from the fireball. They ran to the car, no shoes, no ID's, nothing, and sped away.. She said how loud the torch like fire was, she said they had to scream over the noise of it just to communicate.
Oh the stories I've heard from the gas pipe explosion are incredible.
One woman I met who's house burned to the ground told me about how when they heard the explosion and saw the 200 foot gas fueled torch like fireball; she ran around the side of her house to get into her car. The car was to hot to touch, so she escaped in their other car. She told me how grateful she was that her children "can run fast" That broke my heart. A reporter approached her while we were at the Red Cross station. The reporter said to her "You must think I'm stalking you" funny she would say that. My good friend who's family was evacuated and is staying with me was approached by another reporter, when asked if she lost her house (thank God she did not) she told the reporter "no" the reporter just turned and walked away, apparently not exciting enough. Not getting the story about how her 13 year old who was home alone with the 11 and 7 year olds got her shoeless siblings out of the house and told them to run up the street. That first woman who lost her house She also relayed a story told to her by a neighbor. The neighbor opened her front door to see a young man standing there, skin hanging off of his scorched body, he looked at her and said "I just saw my girlfriend burn to death"
Another friend of my who lives in the blast zone and is displaced, told me how they were sitting down to dinner when they heard the blast. They saw and felt the intense heat from the fireball. They ran to the car, no shoes, no ID's, nothing, and sped away.. She said how loud the torch like fire was, she said they had to screm over the noise of it just to communicate.
Putting up friends who are displaced by the San Bruno explosion. They are okay, in some shock, but okay. They just found out their house is still standing ... lucky.
I am so grateful and happy I can help them.
Been working from home the past couple of days, I like it!!
Perfect weather today in San Francisco.
I got my first paycheck today, yay!
My job is a bit unusual, much of it is just watching the owner work. I can understand that, left to work alone many of us would just goof off. Having someone there helps him focus. He is a really nice guy and I'm learning tons about computers.
How can two people see the same situation so differently.
This site is sucky lately.?
Bought bookshelves, now to assemble them.
Hot here today, the birds are loving the fountain.
I have a blog, somewhere. I only blogged a few times, I hadn't written in it for months, then my IT guy cleaned all my computers and now all my bookmarks are gone. Um, which site was I on? I cannot remember. It was one of the free ones.
If I only had a brain ...
Well, all you little male subbies at large, it worked!! The ball crossing worked like a charm. I got the job, just hope I want it once I get into the meat of the thing.
All of your crossed body parts and well wishes are much appreciated.
I may have landed a new job. I would appreciate it if you cute little male subbies out there would keep your fingers, toes, eyes and yes balls (ouch) crossed for me ...
Joe Bastianich is quite nice, yum!
I have no patience for subs who cannot or will not follow instructions, or are not intelligent enough to do so.
If you want to contact a Domme. Helpful hint number one, READ HER PROFILE FIRST. If not, you may come off as an idiot. Not a good first impression, so subbies, invest the 1-2 minutes it takes, and READ THE PROFILE. Don't be a ding dong.
Woke up thinking about the male form. I love men, I love the male body.?
The sun is setting and the fog is billowing over the hills.
So bloody down today.
I am sitting on my balcony, in my favorite chair, eating watermelon and reading my book. I look to the right, I see the beautiful untouched hills surrounding the watershed. I look to my left and see the beautiful San Francisco Bay. I look straight ahead and see hummingbirds hover and dive their pin point beaks into the feeder only feet away.? Not a bad Sunday afternoon.
Okay, how many of you so called subs or slaves on here are willing to admit you just want to lick some pussy and want your fantasies of sexual domination fulfilled. Who will admit you aren't really submissive (other than with your sexual fantasies) at all??
This is a new one for me.
This guy contacts me on a vanilla site I signed up with a hundred years ago and I finally get the message because I never check it. We email, then I notice the guy on here, ok!, hmmm this could end up to be good. I'm not going to tell him I saw him on here because, well, the element of surprise at an opportune moment and all ... Well, he sees me on here and tells me so, yet he acts very non slave like, so I tell him as much and suddenly he snaps into; please, and Ma'am and all that. He's new, he wants to be trained, yada, yada, yada ... Now suddenly he is off of this site too.. poor faker, got more than he bargained for. I am growing impatient with all these stupid wanna-a-be slaves and subs. Now I'm not a Domme who will whip a new slave or torture them. First of all, I'm not a sadist and I want to get to know them first, before any play. I'm probably the safest Domme on here.? I am not just looking for a warm body to serve me. Cracks me up that I scared him so.... Dip shit gave me his real email address which I saved. What a dope.
I'm such a bad girl, I'm such a renegade. Booze and carbs! Woo Hoo! Saturday night!
Saw "Eat, Pray, Love" it was pretty good, I loved the book.
Can't believe it's Friday night.
Feeling a little out of sorts. I just returned from Tahoe, a place I not only love for it's beauty but I feel it has a spiritual presence that is rarely matched.
Going from being in a beautiful house, surrounded by 11 people who love me to dropping my children with their father and home to an empty apartment in less than a 4 hour span is unsettling. I will spend the next week alone.
My oldest will start high school this Monday, but I will not be there.
My trip ends tomorrow. It always ends to soon. I do love spending time with my family especially my sister. We are very close and don't get to spend as much time together as we would like.
I found some good Dragon's Blood in a cute shop here, it is just what I wanted. I have missed that scent.
I think some subs on here will submit to any Domme to quench their need to serve. What a pity.
Reconnected with a sub I have seen some but with my move and his school/work/marathon schedule, we quit talking for a bit. He will be coming to clean for me and help organize my new place. I really like d, and cannot wait to see him again. My feet and back will be so happy!!
It is just pouring with thunder and lightening here in Tahoe. Got to love summer storms.
Drove to Harvey's in S. Lake Tahoe to go to a Stevie Nicks concert. She is great in concert.
On vacation; and we did apple wood smoked, BBQ'ed pork chops with an apricot, teriyaki glaze, grilled peaches with balsamic, white corn fresh from the farmers market, and sauteed zucchini and summer squash.
My Aunt had a lot of small plums from a friends garden she was going to throw out, so I made a plum jam with ground clove, cinnamon, and sugar, no pectin needed. We used some of the hot jam on the pork chops. We will use the chilled plum jam on toast in the morning. Life is hard.
Dinner was a smashing success. We ladies do try to out cook each other on these trips.
I am in beautiful Tahoe. The air is so crisp and clean. I just love it here.
Pretty bored with this site. Oh flying spaghetti monster in the sky!! I may have to resort to EHarmony, ? ewwwww!
So this sub I emailed with a couple of times, weeks ago, no sparks, no arguments, just hi how's it going etc, out of the blue sends me a message informing me he is going to hide and block me. Okay!! Go for it! I think he has me confused with someone else, so many Domme's so little time.
The weather in San Francisco was beautiful today.
I've been invited to go see Thunder Down Under in SF tonight. Don't know if I can make it, but buffed, half naked men dancing and gyrating? I vote Yes!
Tonight; stir fried curry chicken with oyster sauce and assorted vegetables.
I've just unpacked, washed and put away my English china. Booth's Real Old Willow.
I am going to try and USE it. What good are beautiful things if they are kept in storage.
A link to a great site to find out nutritional information. Lots of graphs and charts for those of you who like that. Also gives you the inflammatory factor of foods.
Been trying to eat less carbs ( I always feel better when I do) and anti-inflammatory foods. Feel pretty good this AM.
After reading some of my journal posts it has come to my attention that I use the word "weird" all to often. Perhaps a thesaurus is in order.
Did you know the word often is pronounced offin?? The T is silent. Perhaps the word is changing and evolving ... it seems like everyone says OFFTIN now.
Just texted with a vanilla man I am friends with. We saw each other,? a couple years back. He is now seeing a 27 year old, he is 54. What do they talk about?, if they talk at all. He even said it was weird. When you have as much money as he does, you can pick and choose your lady friends and I suppose going? younger is the norm, though not for him usually. I am younger than he is, but not young enough to be his child..
I prefer men around my own age or older usually. I enjoy talking about pop culture or historical events and having the person on the other end of the conversation understand my references and or smart ass remarks is an added plus.
Just went to my office after weeks of being gone. I gave up my desk today and basically quit. I wasn't working anyway. Feels weird to have given up my desk. Commission sales is tough, for now I want a job I can leave at work when I go home at night. Now I am searching for such a thing. I have an interview tomorrow, sounds promising. So many changes.
I have a total thing for British men.
Tonight I made; Jerk marinated flank steak broiled rare, sauteed mushrooms, sweet potato fries, green salad with home grown heirloom tomatoes.?
I've been divorced since December, in my apartment since June 1st, yet sometimes I wake up and don't know where I am, then I remember. This all feels really strange. I lived in my house for 23 years, now I'm here.
My move is complete. I have all of my things here at my new place and now sleep in my own bed. I love my apartment. It is pretty big and with the floor plan it seems even bigger. I share no walls with anyone and? have lots of windows. My many plants and I love the light. When I am out on my balcony I can see a bit of the bay through the trees. It is very nice indeed. Many of the people I worked with have been pulling for me to become perm. The director relayed a message to me at home today to call Monday, I think they found me a spot.. Great news with this economy.
Still not interested in any sub right now.. on strike when it comes to men.. and no, I am not bi.
My move is almost done. I sleep here now. It is weird.
Well another weekend is done. I have moved more things into my new apartment. I cannot get over how big this place is.
It's funny, now that I'm divorced and have my own place and could actually really date ... I don't want to anymore. I've had it with men for now.
I am concentrating on getting settled, work and of course my great kids and friends.
I'm not completely moved in yet, maybe 70%. Have slept at the new place a couple of nights, on the sofa. The kids just went to their dad's house. This is weird.
My back hurts from moving boxes and furniture. The new place is starting to shape up though.
Went to a party yesterday then out to dinner and to a country western "Gilley's" type bar called "The Saddle Rack" with friends. I don't know how to line dance, or couples dance, but it sure looks fun. I want to learn, which is surprising because I don't care for country music much. It was all country, all night ... dinner was at "Texas Roadhouse", I had never been, the food was good for a roadhouse type of chain restaurant. They make the waiters dance when they play a certain song really loud, which seemed mean to me. It's bad enough wait people are forced to sing Happy Birthday all the time.
I like to check my email and see what my friends are doing, but for now.. I am not looking.
Burning old paperwork in prep for my move. Ahhhhh, feels good.
This move is so hard. Only one person, my good friend T, offered to help me move. I have sooo much crap from living in the same house for 23 years. Garage sale, here I come! I have been using small boxes for my many books and taking them over. I've moved quite few of them. Got my cable and internet hooked up today. I cannot wait to actually sleep in my new apartment (no beds), but I have to get packed and have the movers come ... which takes time. My new sectional comes Tuesday.. hopefully they can get this one in. School for my kids gets out this Friday, another reason sleeping at the old place is necessary.
Sick of fakers and jerks.
This one sub from Huntington Beach, CA, did it for me.. He went out of his way to try to get me to be interested in him eventhough I don't do long distance.. as soon as I became interested, he became aloof, nice. He was the straw who broke the camels back. I am done. I check my email here, but am not really interested in finding someone anymore ... too many assholes. Now I get it. Now I understand jaded women.
And onto a completely different subject; Broke my coffee press.
I am not bisexual, nor a sub.
I love the idea of having a man who loves and worships me. I love the idea of a LTFLR and not the type where the man gets treated like trash. However, seems like most of the so called subs on here are just interested in fulfilling a fantasy of being "taken" and or want to be a sex toy. There is also an element of "if I like anal, I must be a sub" crap on here too.
I'm not a sadist, I'm not interested in public play, I'm not bossy or dominant just for the sake of it. If something matters and push comes to shove.. I can shove with the best of them.
I don't know if I will ever find the right match.
Moving ... it's a lot of work.
Big day yesterday.
Got an apartment, bought some furniture and then my friends took me out to dinner and dancing for my B-day. We ended up at my new (and empty) apartment for chanpagne.
Fun evening.
Some details about the new gig.
I have a Facebook page and my friends (my REAL friends, not you perverts, ha ha, yum yum) are enjoying my daily blogs on the antics at my job.
I work as a senior community for the very wealthy. It's like being on a cruise ship that looks like a mansion, and never moves, get the picture? I am a concierge.
So many ex professors, authors, musicians, artists live there you cannot swing an ex animated feline without hitting one.
One day a couple came in, she has a walker and they aren't married but dating. Ok, mental note to self.. in their 80's and "dating" perhaps there is hope for me after all. They come in at 7:45 PM and both remark on how tired they are; I am witness to the following conversation;
She says, "I think there's a possibility we're getting old." He says' "What?" ..."I think there's a possibility we're getting old." "What?" "I think there's a possibility we're getting old." "A possibility of what?" pressing his ear toward her mouth. "That we're getting old!"
It went on a little longer than that. Hilarious.
The other day another resident gave me a copy of his book and wrote a little something in it for me. I also get to listen to the great, great grandaughter of a famous composer who was a concert pianist play weekly. She is in her 80's yet plays to keep her fingers and mind sharp. She is so good it sends chills down your spine.
Other comical moments include; a resident insisted I send security immediately because he couldn't open his bottle of Tylenol.
Too many changes, I'm freaking out a bit.
B o r e d
Found a place I want to make an offer on today. Now to get a loan ... eeek!
I cannot express how flattering it is to receive the same cut and paste messages from the same subs over and over and over again... BLOCKED
So sick of assholes.
Well, had my final court date yesterday. All of the divorce details are done. I've been hosed, but just need to get on with my life. Have to move by June 30th. So the search for a place to live begins.
The subs here have been a disappointment.
I've only met one decent sub on here. If a sub contacts me and offers to serve me or be owned by me at first contact, sight unseen. Come on, how seriously do you think I am going to take him? Hmmm? P l e a s e. I go with my gut too. If your photo give me the creeps, or you are rude or don't attempt to get to know me as a person. Forget it.
Some young long distance sub, who said my distance restrictions were "killing him" called me mentally unstable because I pointed out his extreme youth in comparison to my age. This is also on my no list ... I love it when men show you what they are immediately. Saving time and trouble. So nice when they weed themselves out.
Happy Mother's Day to all the Moms out there. I hope yours was nice!
I am in love ...
With my coffee press. Makes such good coffee. I used to only use it because my drip coffee maker broke, but I have grown to love it. I use the Trader Joes soy creamer too, which is the best soy coffee creamer I have tasted.
"When someone shows you who they are, believe them." - Maya Angelou
I hate it when people do a 180 with no warning, rhyme, or reason. It baffles the mind.
So very sick of all the BS
I think, for now, I'm going to put this whole seeking a real s to serve me thing on the back burner. I firmly believe if something is meant to be, it will be.
I understand that men would rather set themselves on fire than actually admit they are no longer interested. Submissive men are probably even worse, not wanting to disappoint and all. That chicken shit attitude drives me nuts. I expect a certain amount of class, and respect, and attentiveness. If you cannot deliver, then don't, but atleast have the balls to say so. If you agree to do certain things, do them. It's as simple as that. This is not complicated stuff. The fastest way to get a Dominant woman to drop you like a hot potato is to be wishy washy and unreliable. If you do not want to serve me, just say so.
When subs contact me and if they are not my cup of tea, I say so ... Guess what? The direct approach actually works, go figure.
For me, men are a consistant source of disappointment.
"So we cheated and we lied And we tested And we never failed to fail It was the easiest thing to do. You will survive being bested. Somebody fine Will come along Make me forget about loving you."
-Crosby, Stills, Nash, and Young
I didn't get into either nursing school I applied to this round. There is always next year. I am liking my new job, so perhaps it's meant to be. I am so looking forward to moving fairly soon.
If you cannot take the 30 seconds it takes to read my profile. Don't bother contacting me. It's as simple as that.
What's with these messages from subs that say; "Thank you for reading my profile." or "Thanks for the message."
When I didn't send them a message or view their profile ... What do they think I have demecia and don't know who I've viewed or messaged??
Took a nap this evening. Whenever I sleep odd hours, I always seem to wake up feeling out of sorts, and missing people who have passed away, or those I haven't seen in years. I wonder why that is.
My first week is done. I keep getting hints, they may want me perm. We'll see.. Lots of nice people, room for advancement, beautiful environment with many interesting, wealthy and influential people.
Started the new job today.. It is good, lots to know and remember, They are pleased, yet I am exausted..Also, an unexpected perk, free lunches and a monthly $50 credit card for the vending machines. Today they had quiche, ribs, lamb stew, ceviche and some other salads.
Just pouring here.
My daughter turned 14 today. She had a great B-day.
Got a temp job today, which is good ... I start Monday. And I heard from a sub I saw for awhile, good to know he is okay, I was wondering.
Beautiful spring day, yet it's supposed to rain Sunday. Hard to believe.
I had two job interviews today, both went well. The first was interesting. The man who interviewed me told me he used to be too submissive with the clients and that he had to crack the whip. After the interview he walked me to the elevator and insisted on pressing the button for me.. I know I'm imagining things.
Disappointment sucks.
:-(
Does anyone really care about how many women Tiger Woods has nailed?? I know I don't.
I wish the media would report actual news and not all of this tabloid hype.
So I've gotten back on track with my walking again.. I love this beautiful path I walk, green, big resevoir, deer, coyote.
I have noticed a path-walking ediquette, so to speak, and all the kids are doing it. As you pass another walker coming toward you, no need to speak. They are probably listening to music too. The "thing" to do is make quick eye contact, half smile and a quarter of a nod, really quick. That is the friendly way to say; "Hey, I see you, don't want to talk to you, but acknowledge your existence." or it can mean; "Nice day, isn't it!"
Ok, Dominant men... I am looking for sub/slaves. I am not a s. I guess you are playing the numbers game... Try reading.
HAPPY EASTER EVERYONE!!
Thanks for all the great advice sb. With decades of slave service experience, you do know your stuff.
Recent experiences have shown me what type of slave/sub relationship I really want. If I am lucky, someday perhaps it will come to pass.
REALLY liking this slave I am talking to.. he lives a fair distance away. Long distance was what I was trying to avoid.. oivey!!
Yesterday a coworker told me about a movie called "Off The Map" Apparently it is supposed to be pretty good and his wife grew up in a hippy family just like in this film in the same mountains in NM. So I checked out the trailor, Sam Elliot is in it. A very sexy man.. though a bit old now.. There is a scene where he is gently kissing the inside of his wife's thigh.. can't wait to see this film. Update: Saw the film, ehh.
I am so excited! I've been in contact with a local ladies tea group in my area. Very well done from what I've heard and read. All the male sub servers are trained especially for these events.
I cannot wait to attend one.
puck, you have been bad. We will talk about your punishment tonight.
I am soon to be an ordained minister. Very exciting stuff.. Well, I'm ordained now by ULC What a hoot, apparently I can marry people now.
Thank you slavebitch for all of your assistance, you truly are a deep well of BDSM knowledge. your concern for my safety is appreciated.
Men can really piss me off.
It's a sunny, calm, 72 degrees. Should have gone to the beach...
Tonight, BBQed steaks and cod with globe artichokes, salad and possibly potatoes.
Like summer today, I am BBQing steaks tonight.
Got a chat request yesterday;
When I replied to ask if he had read my profile, his response was.. I just want to chat with you, if I have to read your profile just to chat, I'll pass...
Ok! Fine by me.
The weather today is true spring and beautiful. My ear is not hurting anymore, though my hearing is not completely back. It is amazing how great you feel when pain leaves you. I guess all of you little maso's know what I am talking about... (wink)
Happy St. Patrick's Day everyone..
Corned beef and cabbage with new potatoes are on the menu tonight; though, it is not really an Irish dish per se', but an American St. Patty's Day Tradition.
Miss our conversations sw. Miss you at my feet dd
Ohhh, I've been home ill for almost a week now.. I am SO bored.
Feeling anxious for tomorrow to come, yet I?ll miss out on today
I know what I like in my sub, but you?ll be a surprise I pray
We?ve yet to meet, or if we have, we?ve missed our window sweet
I know this is where I belong, with you naked at my feet
Be strong, be wise, be cunning, and forever please be sweet
Be my student , be my teacher, and together heights we?ll meet
Your submissive gift is precious, be careful and choose wise
For a little boy submissive, need not a bad surprise
Still searching for the sub that is right for me...
Saw Alice in Wonderland with my kids.. it was good. I still like Avatar better. Interesting to go into a movie and not have it be too loud.
My Gnome Came Home
This is a true story.
I?ve heard stories about people stealing lawn gnomes and taking them on trips. Snapping photos of the gnome at exotic vacation destinations only to return them, with photos, to their homes later; I don?t know if this is true. However, about a year ago my front yard was vandalized, I?m sure by children, since I live next door to a park. Some of my plant pots were broken and a couple of little statues, including my gnome were gone. It only happened the one time in the 23 years I?ve lived here.
Fast forward about 8 months. I had returned home from the store and was walking up my steps only to see, to my great surprise? my gnome! Yes he came home!! I don?t know where he had gone because he didn?t have any photos to share, but he was home. I like to think in an attempt to protect my garden he chased down those kids, then simply got turned around and was lost for a time.
I just read a profile that disturbed me.
This sub male basically says.. ok, I'm new, I've read a lot of profiles and I get it... I do work for you, or give you money and you will touch my dick, thats a fair trade off... lets go.
I know there is an big element of that on here with pros and Domme's demanding "tribute", but to lump all of us into the same catagory pissed me off. Lets take any vanilla dating site for example; Isn't the ultimate goal for all involved finding someone to connect with and yes, if things work out, end up in bed. Humans are social creatures, we need companionship, we crave company, Arn't most of us looking to pair up? (in some cases on here group up)
Perhaps I an naive. Perhaps all men are ruled solely by their penis' and all women are whores who use their vaginas and female attention as a type of currency for barter. I know I am not a pro, I don't ask for tribute and I have met some wonderful submissive men on here who actually want to get to know ME before even approaching the idea of sex. Yes it's nice to know we have some sexually simular likes, but when it comes down to it, I decide IF, when and how it happens. We are all adults here, and I think most of the women on here are sexually freer than your average woman. Does that make us whores? No.
Some of the many reasons I like men, and things men are good for;
-Sex
-They can lift and move heavy objects.
-Reach tall shelfs without a stepstool.
-Opening jars
-Taking out the garbage
-Party prep
-Car and home repairs
-Home and personal security (as in have them investigate a noise etc)
Female Supremacy.
Are you a believer? If so, why?
My ear is bad. I'm hoping it gets better soon. I have a job interview on Monday... Please send good juju my way.. it will be greatly appreciated.
What's the deal with scardy subs?, as I call them. This one guy asked me if he could serve me, then he vanished, ok, whatever. Fast forward a few weeks and he asks me again. When I tell him I must get to know anyone who wants to submit to me, he vanishes again. So, very curious, I send him a friendly note basically asking him "what is up with the vanishing act?" His answer? You're gonna love this... He is too busy working swing shift right now and would rather not be considered ... Um okay, then quit asking!! He is too old for me anyway, but that cracks me up.
Had to see a doctor for my ear today. The meds were expensive, at least I'm not in pain right now. Have tons of white noise in that ear, which is so much fun. I feel like I've been punched in the side of the head.
Went to a salon opening tonight in SF. It was very well done. Drinks, h'ordourves, freebies including a book on sensual living and free condoms in the bathrooms. Gotta love San Francisco. This salon has little fully equiped rooms the stylists pay for and it's a one turn key operation in that everything is provided for them. They pay just under $400.00 a week. With what they charge they would have to do two, maybe three heads a week to make that. If they have a big enough clientele.. not bad.
My friend brought her extremely self absorbed ex. That was fun... ever met someone who just drains the energy out of you? I was tempted to count how many times he said "I" or "me" in 5 minutes. Of course, every woman everywhere "wants" him. Once this yahoo argued with me about my eye color, in a dark bar mind you, and this was the first time we met. I pull no punches with this guy. He know what I think of him. No love lost there.
I have a horrible ear infection, lots of pain, some blood, can't hear. Gotta work tomorrow.
Miss hearing from you S, though I don't think you read my journals anymore.
I have a decent sized account to do tomorrow and here I am, can't sleep. It's 3:45 AM. I'm gonna be draggin tomorrow. I found a banana slug on my kitchen floor around 3:00, don't know how it got there, I set it free.
Had a nice walk today, had to report a small fire in a BART building, but the FD put it out after a bit. I don't know what was in the little concrete building but the smoke was very black and smelled like a combo of electrical and rubber. Someone said it was a transformer. Went to a fun party today. Have another tomorrow. I love my friends. There was a jumpie at the party and my friends husband kept jumping off the second floor balcony onto the top of the thing, collapsing it... he is so much fun.
I wonder how many sub men out there watch "It's Me Or The Dog" and salivate over Victoria Stillwell and her stern dog training sessions.
Men, you are all so bloody predictable.
This site is boring me.
The education protests today were intense. Pretty well organized though. A friend, who is also my daughters science teacher got her pink slip 2 days ago. Another friend of mine is a high school algebra teacher, I'm keeping my fingers crossed for her and all the other teachers. I completely understand the passion attached, I would love to see college fees drop and all public school to be able to afford music, sports and art programs. I want class sizes to be lower so the kids can learn and teachers can teach. However, can you get blood from a stone? Is it a matter of just not making the cuts? Is there money somewhere that can be rerouted? I know as a parent, I am financially tapped out. I give up on the school fundraisers. I would rather hand the cash over to the school than buy a bunch of junk products that I don't want or need only to see the schools get a small cut of it.
Photos of naked male subs doing household chores, melts my butter.
I am so looking forward to the good changes to come. Lots on the horizon.
Hopefully, they will include a nice s man to share them with.
:p
When it rains it pours.
Talking life in general.
I'm feeling extremely restless tonight.
Watching an old comedy right now.
Saw an ad for Casablanca and realize, I have never seen it, what are the odds?
I love coffee!
I have a pod coffee maker, 2 different coffee presses, lots of ground coffee and beans. (won a coffee basket at a school silent auction) hence the multitude of beans and ground. My regular drip coffee pot died a while back. So when I am out of pods, I do pressed. Not my favorite method but with this Starbucks house blend I have, it is mighty good, and pretty fast and strong.. I like it strong. European espresso like strong.
At one point I had my drip coffee maker, 2 presses (different sizes), my pod coffee maker and a small espresso machine ... ok, yes I admit, that is a bit much that is why I haven't replaced the drip maker, and the espresso machine is no more.
The house I am looking at has a bar in the family room.. I'm thinking of making it a coffee bar in addition to the standard booze bar. It would get much more use that way and it would be a place to keep all of my coffee parephenelia.
Dominant men behind the wheel of a car. I swear, I could just strangle them.
Thank you Mr. Man for waving me on at a four way stop ... it's so generous of you to guide this poor helpless female driver. I was having so much trouble figuring out who is to my right and who stopped first. Thank God for you and your superior knowledge ... It's amazing I make it anywhere alive!
Big storm heading in.. Saw the doppler.. it's a good one!
I went shopping today! ... (eyebrows going up and down)
I baked some zucchini, banana, applesauce bread and lasagna today, all my own creations.
Juiced for the first time in a long time this evening;
Broccoli Mustard greens celery pineapple apple (Pink Lady) tangerine
It was green and very good...
:(
In my profile I say;
"Please have some gray matter"
A sub contacted me saying; "Gray Matter ... hair?
I replied; "Brains"
I think he was quite embarrassed, though I thought it was pretty funny.
My well endowed 13 year old just came in and announced that all the boys at her school are pervs.
I told her to get used to it.
I am having a torrid love, hate relationship. How can something that gives so much pleasure also be such a source of complete and total frustration. I cannot stay away, I must touch, touch constantly, fiddle and touch, I crave it.
My computer in itself is fine, I love it.. it?s that, terrible Microsoft Vista that is driving me insane. I never know when or why I will have to reboot, but I do, constantly. My poor friends, Vista hates me and prevents me from my instant messaging without warning. My messages don?t show up or their responses, they think I am either ignoring them or that I have the attention span of a gnat.
Yes, I love my computer, it's the horrid software that?s out to get me.
Took a very short jog today, felt good.
You say, "May I have?" or, "I would really like to have?" or, "What I really want is?" and you can name anything under the sun that you can conjure, and the Universe calmly says, "Here it is," because it is known by All-That-Is that anything that you desire?can be. So, "Yes, here it is."
--- Abraham
Let me just say.. I LOVE MEN! I think they are wonderful, God love um. Contrary to what some think by my previous post.
However, the guiding forces and steady, reliable people in my life have always been the women. That is my experience. I am very open to having that change ... and from the calibur of men I have talked to from this site, especially recently, I think it will someday.
This morning I was in the middle of writing an entry in my other blog; It was about men and my lack of expectations, due to my own experiences with them... not that I don't think there are good men out there, I know they exist. I'm just short on experience with them. As I am writing this, a good friend showed up at my door.. her husband had just beaten her. Interesting timing don't you think?
The Undeniable Power of Bacon
So I can understand the vegetarian movement. Believe me, if I didn?t love meat so much I would be one. I even toyed with the idea of raising my children as vegetarians so that they could make their own, informed, conscious decision if they wanted to eat animal flesh or not, but since I eat meat; I felt it wouldn?t really work. In theory, it was a nice thought though.
I have met more than one vegetarian who, though they stick to their non animal flesh and in some cases vegan diets, sometimes fall off of the wagon now and then. I can understand that, hey, this is a total meat eating society. I can completely see, having the occasional shrimp, or piece of fish, cheese, milk or eggs. Heck milk and eggs are in everything.. And vegetarians seem to be a little more health conscious too. I mean, they tend to eat more vegetables, whole grains, soy etc? However, these vegetarians when they fall off that wagon, they are not eating, milk, fish, or even chicken, but ? its bacon, yes bacon. I understand, bacon is so good and all but what a departure! Of all the meats, and so processed too. I guess bacon has a power no man can resist. The smell, sizzle and salty, oily taste.. Yes, bacon is good. Who can deny the smell of bacon and coffee in the air especially when you are camping? yum!
So Bacon, hats off to you, the most powerful of all meats.
Update; just got a response from a woman who is a vegetarian for years at a time and she confirms, bacon always brings her back...
Well, I've got a regular blog now.. fun
Helped a colleague with an account yesterday. Hopefully, we will make some money on this one, looks good. It felt great to be in front of a group again. Work has been so slow this year. She should have been ready, but she needs a lot of training, which I will provide. I have my work cut out for me, I think there is a little ADD there, but she will be fine. I will break it up into digestible pieces and make some lists. Our manager has once again thrown himself under the bus by not making sure she was properly trained. The big boss takes my recommendations seriously, and always implements them, which is nice. It's always good to feel heard. Most of my friends are educators. Can't swing a dead cat in my life and not hit a teacher. I could never be a teacher, though every job I've ever had always involves me training others. I don't mind it, because it's always short term, and as long as they CAN learn. One job I had I swear this older man had memory issues. I had to repeat the same things day in and day out for months and still no retention.
I am going to start a regular "real" blog elsewhere. I enjoy it so, and since most of my ramblings are non BDSM related, I am sure most on here would appreciate that.
News Flash; I don't care about Tiger Woods, or his affairs, or his marriage, this is not newsworthy. How about they devote the time to world news??
MEN
That old saying; "There's something about a man in uniform." Is SOOO true for me. The firemen at the grocery store always catch my eye. A sailor walking down the street in San Francisco. The guys with their crewcuts, camouflage shorts and green tee's that jog around town here.. I think Army , nope, correction Marines. Yum, though most are waay too young for me. As for men in street clothes, I find I imagine just everyday men I see shirtless with dog collars on, the cute ones at least.
Men, gotta love um.
Well, this evening I had a nice meeting with a fellow CM'er. Oh get your minds out of the gutter.. just dinner and nice conversation. He is cute though.
I applied to another nursing program today. Everything fell into place. I had put it off, thinking I had through the 20th to apply.. When I checked this morning I discovered the deadline was the 19th at 4:00. So I got on the schtick. I printed and filled out the application. I discovered I had no registration number.. so I quickly registered for Fall online. I was told it could take 24 hours for my number to come through.. kicking myself for putting it off, why oh why did I put it off! Then less than a hour later my number came through. Last hurtle.. I needed assessment tests or waivers for them. I did the classes and found out where to go to get my waivers and jumped in the car. Parking at City College is like parking at most colleges... non-existent. So, I made my own parking space on a corner in the parking lot, where there was plenty of room for the cars to get by.. I fully expected to get a ticket but was willing to take that chance.. I had a work meeting to get to. I got my waivers, and dropped off my application. They checked everything for me and it was done. I'll know late April. No ticket on my car either! Start to finish including searching for parking, under 2 hours. Not bad.
Your secret is safe with me... I won't tell a soul.
I like you SW.
If you love something, set it free, if it comes back to you, it's yours. If it doesn't, hunt it down and kill it.
Mavericks surf contest was today and some spectators got hurt. It's so close by. I've always wanted to watch, but the crowds are pretty big.
Went out to dinner with a friend at a restaurant called "Home" in the Castro http://www.home-sf.com/ Then off to Japan Town to the Kabuki Theater to see a movie. "Up In The Air with George Clooney". It was good. It's Complicated was sold out. The Kabuki is a great theater http://sundancecinemas.com/kabuki.html It has 8 screens, 3 levels, a full bar and you can buy wine by the bottle and take it into the theater with you. They play the Sundance Film Festival movies there. It also has a Peets Coffee. We got this little piece of chocolate Polco Dolche burnt caramel with sea salt it was around an inch and a half square, we shared it, it costs $2.25 but was so good. http://www.pocodolce.com/ After the movie we stopped in the restaurant attached to the Kabuki. It was Hawaiian night and they had live hula dancers.
It's amazing, I grew up here in the bay area yet my friends.. one from Columbia Maryland and the other from Minneapolis Minnesota both know San Francisco like the backs of their hands.. ok, I've never lived in SF and they have, but still ... I am getting better though, I work there a lot and have to drive around the city, so I am learning.
Going to bake a heart cake today to take to my sister's house tomorrow. It will be white cake with little red specks in it, double layer. I will combine chopped strawberries with the frosting in the middle of the layers.
We will enjoy the play my niece is in, have a nice dinner, then eat the cake as we look out down the Santa Cruz mountains toward the sea. Life is good.
The kids are off of school today and Monday for the holiday.
I am enjoying a quiet house, drinking my coffee and cooking my steele cut oats. I have a mixture of currents, raisens, raw almonds, and dried cranberries to top it with, plus some brown sugar.
I did something I rarely do. I spent money on concert tickets back in May. I HAD to see Fleetwood Mac, it was a MUST! I splurged and my friend and I got 11th row center. Little did I know, if you were in the first 15 rows you could go up to the stage... and me being the on time or (before) time type of person I am. We got there early and were able to get a spot standing at the stage, arms resting ON the stage. The concert was FANTASTIC! I got some GREAT photos and got to strum Lindsay Buckinghams guitar. Stevie Nicks looked great except for her black Reebok sneakers with wedge platform bases attached and with a calf sleeve to give the illusion (from afar) that she was wearing black boots... She sang great! She looked great! Though she kind of hobbled on and off the stage. Arthritis? Perhaps, she is in her mid 60's now. God I feel old.
Now the Eagles are coming to town... hmmm yet another group I WOULD spend money to see. I went to Tahoe for a wedding a few years back and the Eagles were having an outdoor concert near my hotel.. They sounded GREAT! So I know this would be yet another concert to remember..
I think I may have to go.
Getting ready for a big meeting in SF. Large company that if I could sign would be a nice feather in my cap. Many have tried with this one and failed... we will see. It's downtown, driving and parking downtown is such a pain.
Lady Oddsworths thought of the day.
Dominant or just sexually assertive? Submissive or just a desire to be seduced?
At what point does a sexually assertive woman cross over into being a dominant one?
At what point does a man who desires to be seduced become submissive.
I ask because I have a feeling many on this site are just that .. sexually assertive or aggressive, and others like the idea of being seduced. ___________________________ Nice sub man called me yesterday evening, so I must not seem too "nuts". ___________________________
I will be Valentineless this year and I am ok with that.
Already had a quicky this morning.... meeting that is. Geeze, get your minds out of the gutter.
Now I am home eating oatmeal, that horrid instant type. I prefer steel cut oats, but no time this morning. I've topped it with currents, dried cranberries and raw almonds.. it is yummy.
Ever heard the phrase "letting crazy out of the bottle"? What it means is showing a potential partner your crazy side too soon. We all stay on our best behavior... at first. I fear I have let crazy out of the bottle waaay too soon while talking to a wonderful sub man via here. He is nice, and understanding of all the major life events I am currently going through.. but I leave these conversations convinced I will never, ever hear from him again, but alas... I do. Hang in there sweetie... the crazy dust will settle.
No super Bowl party for me.. The one I had been invited to got cancelled due to a death in the family. It was ok, (the party being cancelled) with me. I stayed home.. didn't really watch the game. I glanced a bit. Yes, I admit it, I am a fair weather fan. If the 49ers arn't in it.. forget it anyway. Blasphemy!? I can hear some of you men moaning in disappointment... sorry!
My social life seems to be picking up.. thank you CM..
I've been a bad, bad girl.
I posted a pic of Lois torturing Stewie from Family Guy. The moderators took it off almost immediately, oh well, copyright issues.
I am learning so much from this site. I have met some really nice people.. I know I have said that before. I think if you are serious, sincere and be yourself, you can definitely find someone on this site.
Went out with my girl friend last night. We couldn't get a table or spot at the bar at the restaurant (BJ's) we wanted to go to. It has been easier to get into lately with the new Hooters that just opened... did you know they fly in really hot Hooter girls when they open a new one then gradually faze the really hot chicks out. We ended up at Chili's. The wait wasn't as bad but the service was horrid. We couldn't get a busboy to clean the table, then no waiter to be found.. and all we wanted was a margarita. I think they were short on staff because usually when "we" go out the men fall all over us.. because my friend is EXTREMELY beautiful.
It is weird, the restaurants here are always packed. You would think the economy was just fine.. but it isn't. I guess people are just pickier about what they spend money on... small electronics, cell phones and eating out..I hope this recession / depression ends soon.
Feeling down today. Another court date looms in March. I have no faith in the legal system anymore. I know I will be okay eventually... I look forward to years in the future when I can look back on all of this and feel separated from the pain, but I need to process these feelings for now. Maybe I'll go for a jog.
Going out tonight with the girls. (as in my friends not just my breasts, though they will come too!)
How are all of you beautiful men today? Good I hope.
So what is "Tribute" anyway? I've seen some about it on this site. Are men supposed to pay non pros for, um a Domina talking to them? How does it work? Do they have a P.O. Box or actually give out their real address to get these gifts? Paypal? Is it because they are so beautiful that men will pay just to have some sort of interaction with them? Is this for online cyber domination I keep getting asked to do? Hey wait a minute...
Anyway, what types of gifts are given? Do any of you men out there actually pay tributes to women on this site?? I would like to know..
Thanks.
Not much to report today. I am getting used to the idea of losing my court case. Hopefully, some wonderful things are on the horizon for me.
I have been looking at a place I like that I hope stays on the market until I am ready.
Hmm.... someone didn't check in today... I am disappointed, and he checked in later than usual yesterday. I wonder what is up?
It has come to my attention recently that there are a few people who actually read my journal on a regular basis... that is so cool.
Here you go!
I've met some really interesting men on this site. Of course, I am looking for straight, submissives, perhaps switch men. The degree of interest in any of the particular bdsm activities varies so greatly, from person to person, as does the level of true intimacy wanted. Some know exactly what they want and like, having little interest in who YOU are, but as long as you can deliver that activity in the intensity they like.. everything is fine... that's not my cup of tea.
Me, I'm a little more picky, I want to actually care for my sub, and some men out there want the same, which is good. I talked with a strong man, new to this who is so fearful about submitting he cannot bring himself to just send me some more vanilla photos I've requested. I am not interested in having such a power struggle over such a trivial thing. If he is this stubborn about that, and has to have control on this level, perhaps he is not submissive at all. He fears being a doormat... So, sending me photos on my request and pleasing me in that way makes him a doormat? I think not.
Others are so deeply submissive it is almost as if they have lost all humanity. Eagerly awaiting their next command. Ok, that is nice, and all play aside... you are indeed human, right? Yes, I want a man who will defer to me. I make the final decisions. I want a man who has a mind, and his own thoughts. A man, who once he knows me, can trust me when he is at his most vulnerable, A man who will bring his knowledge, intellect, personality, and wit to the table. If I am wrong about something, he can tell me. I am not a dictator; I am not to be feared. I know some into this lifestyle may take it to that level, not me. I am not perfect by a long shot.
That is a lot to ask. Heck in just plain relationships finding a match is hard enough, and that's without bsdm added in.
Seeing as how I've been experiencing ... well, a hellishly bad patch lately. I decided to go see a movie this afternoon, alone. I love seeing movies by myself, it can be quite self indulgent. You pick the film, no comprimising, you can sit wherever you like, nobody will talk to you during the film, and you don't have to share yor popcorn. Don't get me wrong, I love seeing movies with friends too, but if you have never gone to a movie alone, you should really try it. I am lucky, I live (for now) within a 5 minute walk from a huge new theater complex with 20 screens, so I walked over. I saw Avatar again.. this time the theater wasn't packed and I was able to sit more center and not in the first few rows.. I opted for the 3D version again. Did you know the newist craze in home theater will be 3D? How fun does that sound?? I did enjoy it.
I want to thank all the people who contacted me about my objectification question. Much appreciated.
Show common sense.
If you can't take the time to read profiles don't be shocked if I or anyone on this site does not respond to you.
If in my profile I say; no married, no long distance, no online... BELIEVE it.
It takes a lot of trust for someone to allow you to tie them up and ... do whatever you want to them. I admire that about submissives.
I've been reading in the archives about objectification and what subs get out of it... as in how it makes them feel.. I liked the comparison to holding a yoga pose, and also the relief from having to think, and just be an object. Also how much joy it brings a sub to be of use to their Mistress/Goddess or Master/Sir sexually or not.
I would enjoy hearing other ways objecification makes subs feel, if any of you out there care to share.
Went for a walk, jog today. Didn't do much to lift my mood.. just gotta ride it out.
Went out for a drink and some conversation with one of my closest friends. One drink and I am wiped out... guess I must be emotionally exhausted. I am going to sleep good tonight. I love sleeping in a cold room, I sleep so much better.
Last night was nice, I spent it with a nice man. he helped massage some of my stress away. I feel much better today.
I cannot wait to have my own place so that I can have guests over. (eyebrows going up and down)
It is a very dark day. I lost my court case. My ex-husband gets the house.
I fimly believe everything happens for a reason, and that in the ashes of this loss something wonderful will be born. However, the immediate sting of this leaves my eyes swollen from crying.
He may have the house, but he has lost all respect from his entire family, my family and most of our friends, and most sad of all, our children. How big of a win is this really for him?
I know you don't know me, but sending uplifting thoughts my way would be greatly appreciated... thanks.
So I?ve never been the most graceful of women. Some would say that is part of my charm.
Today I was scheduled for a mani/pedi , so I put on my sandals and headed out the door. As I was leaving the house I stepped on a patch of moisture (from all the rain we?ve had) and my foot slid out from under me; As I was falling, all went into slow motion. I used to snow ski a lot so often when I slip I can recover by skiing for a few inches? not this time because my foot slid right off of the edge and down the steps I went, landing on my hind end. Ouch! That?s nothing?
I don?t think anything can top the time I accidentally brushed my teeth with Ben Gay instead of tooth paste. Hey, the tubes were the same size, and next to each other.
Note: the cap to Ben Gay is red. I learned that the hard and hot burning gums way.
eric, I can't tell you how much I appreciated you contacting me, to tell me how I as a Domina should act. To tell me how I lack confidence. Too bad you didn't double dog dare me to call you the names you enjoy, which we both know is what you wanted. If not putting up with shit from a man, especially a sub is not having any confidence.. Then sign me up baby!
I don't have much of a sense of humour today. The kids are hiding.
What a busy, busy work day.. 5 meetings.
Got a very sweet email from a very special man, thank you dd for the kind words, that made my day... you're a sweetheart.
Family Guy episode "Peter's Two Dads" has a great scene where Lois loses her temper and hits baby Stewie. He then realizes he has never felt more alive and starts trying to get her to hit him.. There is a funny little BDSM scene Stewie fantasizes about with Lois all decked out in leather, stretching him on a rack and burning him with a cigarette with Stewie yelling "Thank You!" it is hilarious.
Send me good thoughts and good juju;for a possible new job, and that my trial today goes my way...
Santa Claus, the Tooth Fairy, the Easter Bunny, they all get credit for what we parents do. Thank God candy and flowers on Valentine?s Day aren?t attributed to Cupid, and it is ValenTINE?s Day, not ValenTIME's, which I hear people say. Can you imagine; children writing letters to Cupid asking for their favorite candy? And, all the cartoon and claymation specials starring Cupid and explaining how he got his wings and who invented the love potion on the tip of those arrows, and why. Ouivey!
Valentine?s Day is another greeting card, candy industry, flower growers, jewelers, and restaurateur?s cash cow. Yet another reason for the masses to hit the stores and spend, spend, spend, and remember, if you REALLY love her, You will buy her Diamonds! We put so much pressure on ourselves.
All kidding aside, Valentine?s Day is ok, it can be a very romantic or suicidal day, depending on your take on it, and of course, relationship status. I am just grateful I don?t have a Valentine tree to put up, or 70 Valentine cards to send family and friends who I haven?t seen in 20 years. Or that I have to figure out how to be at 3 Valentine parties in different towns on the same day, or that my favorite radio station has been hijacked and is playing nothing but Valentine music for a month.
Thank you Cupid, for not being very popular.
Went out dancing and drinking last night. Had a great time. Danced so much, in my heels, my legs are sore. I'm a little hung over, but not too bad. My friend tried to talk me into yoga this morning. No, not with a hangover. I will take a walk later.
I get around 4 of these a day;
Mistress
i will the best you can get
Please give me a try
i own a import co` and do very well
in me vanilla life . i live 3 month a year in Edge Water NJ
and 9 month a year in New Port Cost CA
Note in my last entry, I didn't mention rain once.
Last night was a lot of fun. Great Thai food in San Francisco, and a foot massage from a very cute man.. I be a happy girl!! dd, I know eventually you will read my journal. Thank you for the nice evening.. looking forward to the next time...
The rain will not stop.
Going out tonight, hope it lets up.
It is pouring out. My sister has had no power for days now. I moved all of today's meetings to next week. I'm not going out in this. I will work from home today.
We have tornado warnings.. that is unheard of around here.
Well, the MA senate seat race is over..
How are all of you sweet men doing today??
WOW! What a storm! I still have power, our neighborhood rarely loses it. I went to bed alone and woke up with everyone in my bed.. The thunder scared the kids. This type of storm reminds me of summer storms in Fargo, hail, thunder, though this is colder.
Yes I know, what's the big deal? We native Californians have a delicate constitution when it comes to weather. We simply are not used to it.
Just added a video greeting and changed my audio one.. What a fun feature.
I love British men. However, I live in the States.
It poured today and is supposed to rain all week. I love the rain..
Looking forward to Thursday, dd, you know who you are... ;p
A vanilla friend who knows of my journey is bugging me. He wants to buy me some boots to see me in them.. Ya, I'm sure that's all he wants. He's been trying for a long time to get out of the friend zone. We just don't have enough in common and for me the chemistry isn't there. He is persistant though, I'll give him that. People always want what they cannot have. Which leads me into orgasm conrol and how crazy it must make subs... hmm
Well this weekend was completely uneventful. I guess I could use some down time, but I do like to keep busy. Did some reading and I did go out with my frineds Friday night, but other than that.
Observation; I love the profile and or kink pics with a dirty, messy or cluttered room in the background. I'm not claiming to be clutter free. I live in a very old house that has very little closet space. I am a General in the war against clutter, and I don't win every battle either. It's just funny some of the pic some people post.. I saw this one someone posted it on another site, I think Craigslist, anyway, this woman took a photo of herself in the bathroom from up above her head looking up. The photo of her was good, nice angle etc but the toilet was behind her and you could see down into it, where she had left a log floating...nice.
So many of my friends have breast cancer, it's scary. Just found out another is sick today. She has to have both breasts removed..
Well, another Friday is at hand. Another week is at an end. I have been contacted by some very nice and repectful men, and some not. I am thoroughly enjoying this site. I haven't been on a real date, or I guess better said, had a "friend" in a very long time... hey, I'm picky. However, I have a good feeling about CM.
A big rain storm is on the way. It would be nice to have someone to sit in front of the fire with. Someday, soon.
There are a lot of submissive men on here wanting to serve. Does anyone know the ratio of straight sub men to Domme woman? Someone told me it is 20 - 1. Great for us Domme's. Too bad for subs who treat a Domme badly and get tossed out of the running.
San Francisco Bay Area BDSM Events Calendar. Also on the message boards under events.
I cannot believe prop 8 is still being debated. In years to come, this struggle for basic human rights will be remembered in the same way the desegregation of schools, and woman?s suffrage is today. I find it hard to believe now; in 2010 the right to gay marriage is still on the table.
Nice rainy day, lunch with a friend. Life is good.
It is supposed to rain tonight, I cannot wait.
Last week I asked a sub I had been talking to several times a day for weeks to finally meet me for coffee. He never spoke to me again. I was just being used for kinky wank material. I feel used and violated, and not in a good way. I see this guy on CM all of the time, no doubt gathering more material for his collection. I think he reads my journals. If so, Thanks.
I guess there is no way to know if someone on any site is sincere, or are what they say they are.
Feeling sad tonight.
Last nights dream;
I love dreams, they can be so bazaar
I was looking for a mobile home to buy. I was looking at this one I liked and Captain Picard was the realtor there. He was sitting at the dining room table with yet another buyer. In one of the back bedrooms was a metaphysical store. I bought some small posters of star charts and immediately lost them somewhere in the house.. Warf was assisting me in finding them. I then heard some rain. It didn?t sound right, so I started to look at the ceilings in all of the closets to see if there was evidence of a leaky roof and sure enough there was. I told Captain Picard the roof was leaking and he confirmed that yes, this particular unit needed a new roof.
-Some background on me; I like Star Trek, I used to sell mobile homes, I am looking to buy a manufactured home right now, and I love metaphysical shops.
A lady was talking to another woman at a party, her new friend asked her if she had ever been married? The lady relplies; "Oh, my yes, four times! My first husband was a very wealthy man, unfortunately after just one year of marriage he died. My second husband was a trapeze artist for the circus, sadly, he died too. My third husband was a preacher and after a long illness he passed away, and my fourth husband, who just died a few months ago, was a funeral director."
"I am so sorry, that's quite a loss." said her friend.
"Oh, you know." said the four time widow, "One for the money, two for the show, three to get ready, and four to go."
Why do people have to be unkind.
Why do men have nipples?
The answer is that as embryos men and women have similar tissues and body parts. If anything the embryo follows a 'female template'. That is why nipples are present in both sexes. It is the effect of the genes, the Y chromosome and the hormone testosterone that brings about the changes and masculinises the embryo. Testosterone promotes the growth of the penis and testicles. Because nipples are there before this process begins the nipples stay!
Another work week is at an end. I will work from home again today, only breaking to have lunch with a good friend. (and play on this site of course)
Sometimes men send me their photos with one or two lines, they are attractive men, but the umph just isn't there. Just because someone is easy on the eyes does not mean automatic consideration. I need substance. Then when I say I am not interested, they insult me...which shows me, I have made the right decision. I work from my gut and heart. I listen to that little voice, woman?s intuition, whatever you call it. Then he may say; "Well you didn't even get to know me!" Perhaps, but you cannot give nothing and expect everything. Show me you have a mind, sense of humor, interests (other than being strapped down or spanked) Show me youbefore you show me your kink. Just because we have some of the same BDSM activity boxes checked on this site, and you find me attractive does not a match make. You want automatic immediate activity? Go see a pro.
I had a productive work day, worked from home.
I have some dates left over from my sugar plum adventure. So I have made a decision. If I cannot find a date, I'll grow one. I am attempting to germinate some of my date seeds..
Exciting stuff I know.
I reached back into time and made Sugar Plums this Christmas. What a healthy alternative to cookies and cakes.
Sugar plums are finely chopped nuts and dried fruits of various varieties, mixed with just a small amount of honey to bind them. You then roll them into balls...simple as that. Note the lack of processed items and Corn syrup. Back from a day when processed foods other than dried or canned did not exist. They are wonderful and keep for a long period.
"As visions of sugar plums danced in their heads".
I applied to nursing school again yesterday. Hope I get in this time, it's all done by lottery. If you are reading this, please keep finger and toes crossed for me! Oooo that may hurt! And please send good juju my way. The school informed me that they may have to scale back on the already short amount of spaces available due to budget cuts.
People don't understand why it's hard to get into nursing schools, and why they are so impacted. Nurses are needed, there are pleanty of us wanting to go into the field, however there are not enough schools. When I am asked why there arn't enough schools, I tell them. I believe one of the bigger issues is that nurses make much more money nursing than teaching.
Feeling good this AM. I've got my tea. Going through a tea faze. It's ususally coffee for me but once in awhile, I crave tea.... so I give in to those cravings and indulge them. I have a tea cabinet, full of different types of tea. This months liking.... Red Rose.
I am learning so much here.
If a sub male contacts me and has read my profile sometimes I can tell, (if it's more than a one liner) I like that very much. For those who don't read or pay attention to things I say and ignore details in my emails to them; i.e. I think we should email a bit to get to know eachother and they push to meet right away, and keep pushing... um, that isn't very sub like and or polite. It makes me wonder about their ability to really listen and get outside of themselves long enough to be open to learning my ways.
I just have to keep reminding myself.... people online can pretend to be anyone/anything. I am extremely honest and really here to meet someone. Yet sadly, many are only here to satisfy their kink while down in their mothers basement.
Another good day at work. It's nice to be back on a schedule.
I love the people on this site. The boards are chock-full of intelligent and interesting people.
Why would a prospective sub, just stop talking to you.. No, "It was nice meeting you", or "I don't think we are a good fit", Nothing, I don't get it. It's such a disposible society.
Men continue to baffle me.
First "real" day back to work in almost a month.. Between sick kids and then Xmas vacation, I didn't get much work done in December. Today two business meetings, a catered lunch, a 2010 kickoff and the boss' birthday, it was work and a big day long party all rolled into one.
I only talked with one person who didn't like Avatar as much as I did. Cameron has another hit on his hands.
Went to see Avatar, it was so good. Now I don't usually go to see a movie at the theatre more than once, but I will for this one. How long has it been since you heard the audience applaud at the end of a movie. I loved it.
1/2/2010 11:10:18 AM:
Due to some general confusion, I have changed my name.
I am now LadyOddsworth and will be posting as such.
I spend way too much time on this site.. especailly when I'm home sick. These boards are addicting.
_______________________________ 12/30/2009 6:48:23 PM: My favorite type of profile photos are;
Male subs naked bowing low and forward facing, and general every day photos, clothes on. _______________________________ 12/30/2009 6:21:11 PM: I love the boards, so many answers.
I was talking with a lovely male sub a while back.. when I expressed my surprise and loss at why a complete stranger (yet another sub) would want to clean my house, when he didn't even know me, he (the aforementioned sub) felt I was being judgemental, and that was pretty much that for us.
Now I see the posts on Sub Frenzy, when a sub is SOOO eager to serve he will serve for any domme, right or wrong for him. Now it makes sense. All the emails from subs who, based only on my profile, and photos, are willing to fly here and live chained in my closet for my amusement (well that one I did take with a grain of salt) but you get my drift. So many subs offer up their services bases on nothing but a few written words and a snap shot or two. That is a way of fulfilling their overwhelming desire to serve, period. A way that can get them into real trouble if they aren't careful.
I want a real relationship with a man who happens to be submissive. The fantasy is great, and the play will be incredible, but I have to know and like/love my sub.. _______________________________ 12/30/2009 5:56:44 PM:
I am finding this BDSM (I?m more BD than the SM) journey to be so very interesting. I am noticing the term ?never say never? really does apply to me here. Hard and soft limits evolve and change as you grow.
A sweet sub I have been talking with, he and I talk a lot about men and anal stimulation. There are so many straight men who feel guilt over enjoying anal play. I understand the appeal; there are so many nerve endings there. Yet, some men seem to have a level of guilt to overcome surrounding it. I personally don?t think there is anything wrong with it. I am noticing some men who are new to this, truly struggle with the whole inner fear that if they like ass play that something may be wrong with them, or that it is a ?gay? thing. This particular boi has longed for this for years, but couldn?t tell his lovers about it.
I am also gaining a better understanding about cross dressing. Which I personally don?t happen to care for; I LOVE men and prefer them masculine. However, used as a means of humiliation, I can see how it would be a useful tool, which I believe is the main point. I would prefer to see subs in their profile pictures minus the heels and panties, but that is my taste.
We went to the ballet today, and it was wonderful. Peninsula Ballet Theater does a lovely production of the Nutcracker. The dancers are excellent and unlike some other smaller company?s they have a live orchestra of 37 players. The music was perfect! I do love Tchaikovsky. I especially enjoyed the male dancers; usually in short supply, they had more this year than ever. Very talented, strong, handsome men in tights, what more could a woman ask for?
Later I did some Christmas shopping and I was the recipient of a random act of kindness. It wasn?t a huge thing, but it made me feel good.
I like CM very much, I feel right at home here. I cannot wait to meet a sub I can play with and learn with/from. So far, I have met some really nice people.
