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Male Submissive, 31, Tucson, Arizona
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About kelila
shani from yahoo Dungeons...~saddly shani was taken..so had to use this name.....~
A slave is a truly enraptured and enrapturing creature, capable of the greatest pain and the deepest passion. She is a temperamental creature, simultaneously fickle in her emotions, and fiercely, ferociously devoted in her affection..She is tumultuous and tempestuous, a mercurial maelstrom, she knows no other way to be. If she could, she would not change, because, on some primeval level, she realizes that the death of her passion would be the death of her,In truth, a slave is not simply the finest of all creatures; she is the epitome of all creatures. She combines strength and weakness, boldness and a certain shy innocence, languor and desperation; she is both cosmopolitan and naive. Her nature is an amalgam of all that is passionate in any sense of the word. She is nothing without an owner, but in his arms, she is all things.She will define her entire world by your moods,enchanting herself with them, until she has internalized them so completely that a single look from you can bring her to laughter, or to tears, or to orgasm, or to suicide. She will love you with an abandon that will leave you stunned |
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many things have happened lately...none good..they change a girl...she has changed..when once..she was full of dreams...and passion...life...eagerness to serve...seh sees only darkness...feels only pain...she is tired...
tired of trying...tired of dreaming....she feels there is nothing left of her to give...many come to her...offer her words of encouragement..some...want to....fix her...
one Master stopped talking to her...and another...a Master friend told her today...that she is a wonderful girl...kind..passionate..compassionate..pleasing in all ways...that He had a great interest in her...then goes off to collar another...oh sure He aplogizes...and offers the same words..of her so called....greatness.... except now...they fall on deaf ears..if she was as He said she...well..its obvious she wasnt...
she feels cold..dark...her head hurts...her heart hurts...
i dont think people realize..just how deeply a slave gives..as a kajira...she was trained to hold nothing back...after awhile...each time...a piece of her gets whittled away...till eventually she feels there is nothing left...her own private hell..
is she still a slave..are her manners habbit..or..her...is she dead..or simply laid dormant till the fabled right "One" comes along....
she remembers..not long ago...being so full of hope and promise...and dreams...eagerness..ache...
she doesnt speak these words for sympathy....or attention....she speaks them..in hopes..somehow...someway...she will find the strength to return to her slavery...to proudy wear her redsilks...and dance..and serve..and dream as she once did...
till then.. she remains comfortably numb...
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