Inghammar

Stirred from its reverie by fresh air hissing into nose tubes, hidden eyes opened to the darkness of the hood as the cabinet door holding it was opened. The bonds fixing it to the back of the display cabinet were removed and it was manacled while still inside the cabinet.

With a firm pull, the plug filling its sheathed mouth yielded past its rubber lips leaving the mouth constricted into a tight 'O' in its absence. It felt a light tug as the plug fell and dangled from a length of chain from its collar. The plug, now acting as a lead to a leash, pulled on chain connected to its collar compelling it to step forward out of the cabinet.

A hushed drone wooshed from earbuds isolated it from outside noise as its fettered legs walked in small, measured steps floating in the absence if sound in the direction the leash pulled.

It was soon secured once again with arms above its head, twisting in its chains. Now at its destination, the lead was no longer necessary and would be inserted once more into it.

The jaw inside the mask struggled against the unrelenting elasticity of the hood stretching the o-shaped mouth to once more accept the plug which was inserted slowly to allow air displaced by the plug to escape. With one final push, the plug settled in the sheath and remained firmly in place despite a sudden reflexive gag.

Please note - I am not the author. This comes from a Tumblr blog that has long since been deleted and I am posting it here because I believe the points made are very worthy of preservation.

If you are truly going to own and dominate a woman, you must understand her. Everyone, of course, is unique, but I’ve seen some of the same things over and over between the submissive women I have known:

They are motivated by a deep desire to please. When you ask a “vanilla” woman what to do, she will sometimes reply “whatever you want”, which is simply annoying. However, you must understand that phrase for what it is from a submissive. She wants more than anything to please you. Whatever plans or ideas she had on her schedule, if she can make you happy she will be more fulfilled than doing whatever she wanted to do for herself. You must understand that phrase for what it is.

Now, this can easily become abuse. Every submissive woman I have ever personally known has been through a number of abusive relationships. She gives and men take and take and it becomes abusive. Weak men with self-esteem issues are often drawn to these women, which compounds the problem. It takes enormous strength and experience to take from a woman like this (which is what she needs) without abusing her. Your job is to soak up all her love and affection and attention, help her find ways to please you, while supporting and strengthening her as a person. This takes wisdom, experience, and, I believe, some age. I cannot imagine a 20 year old guy being a successful “dom” in any real sense of the word.

When you find her, she will likely have things in her past she is not proud of, and you may not be either. That doesn’t matter. You must accept her exactly as she is, with all of her flaws, imperfections and mistakes and you must never hold them against her. If you are worthy of the task, she will be transformed by her relationship with you… practically an alchemical transformation… lead into gold was only a metaphor for transformation you know? It was always about transforming the common and the broken into the sublime. If you can’t accept her, you can’t have her.

She needs to understand and to come to trust that you are not like the people who have hurt her in her past. She has developed complex coping and self-protective mechanisms. If you would possess her, you must strip them away and this takes time, love and persistence. If you do not do that, then your relationship will be a sham because you don’t have her, you have the face she has prepared to protect herself from the outside world.

She will naturally subjugate her desires to yours. In my opinion, you have a sacred responsibility to build her up and to strengthen her as a person. Again, you better have the wisdom and experience to do this… if not, find your way together, but be honest with her that you cannot give her what she needs.

A continuation of the above point: not every submissive is a masochist… often they are, but not always. New and wanna-be Doms need to be told this because if she sees you want to beat her even if she doesn’t want it, she won’t say no. In my opinion, if you find a woman you really care about, you need to do a lot of work understanding what makes her tick, and that does take work. My girl, for instance, literally could not answer the question “what do you want?” when we started talking. Could not answer it. You do not realize how difficult that question can be for a natural submissive, but you need to teach her how to think about it and answer it sometimes.

Above all… above all other things… be honest with her. In a relationship like this, trust is the one thing that cannot be repaired. If you damage it, you’re done. You also need to be aware that most of these women (in my experience) have an uncanny sixth sense. They are actually or very nearly psychic and will read all of your communications on every level. Don’t lie to them. It’s not worth it and once they catch you in a single lie, you now go into the same pile of “men who hurt her” and you will never truly be trusted again.

There is no depression or sorrow that can compare to what happens when you hurt or disappoint one of these women. Make sure you understand the responsibility you are assuming when you begin a relationship. On the other hand, they are capable of loving on a level that you probably cannot even begin to comprehend.

Again let me say this clearly: you have tremendous, profound and sacred responsibility for and to this woman. Don’t fuck around with this lightly.

This post is not about sex. Done properly, neither is your relationship with her.

Carbon Neutral Gimp:

Surveying my 'gimp' supplies gave me an unusual moment of pause. I ruminated upon the enormity of the gear required for this lifestyle and I began to think more about the toll that production of latex, leather, and nylon take upon our environment. 

Perhaps this was the catalyst for a deeper sensitivity and understanding.  I began to consider the austere life of a gimp. I feel that some electronic diversion is needed to enrich the gimp closet after hours when alone. 

I thought about a battery charged by a stationary bicycle which could, after much use, provide power enough to charge a low-power device such as a tiny led light by which to read or even a short time on a small computer. Of course the work that would go into powering even the lowest powered device for a short time is quite taxing - it will ensure that such diversion is truly needed and desired.  

Call me Ed Begley Jr if you must, but I feel it is the duty of all of us to reduce our carbon footprint wherever we can. 

Profile of the day:

Lady complains about 'lack of intelligence' and follows it up with a spurious privacy statement that went around facebook. Note to internet users: by signing up on a website you agree to their ToS. It cannot be abridged or altered by pasting this crap on your profile: 

Observations:

Nothing quite screams "I am a hot mess bubbling with trust issues and a crippling personality disorder" than a complete submissive type writing "Watch out, this kitten has claws!" or someone claiming to be wild and in need of "taming" in their profile. Coming across as a beat down burned out victim of life in one's profile is not flattering. When burnout hits (and it hits us all) this is not the place to be. Take some time off and find something you enjoy doing. Some suggestions:

Pottery class

Evening class at the adult learner annex of your local community college

A sport with some communal element such as softball

Also for the love of (insert earth deity here), no more wiccan poetry!

Suitable living arrangements:

I have been considering practical ways of keeping a slave / pet / gimp secluded in a practical and reasonable way. Some notions that go into planning are

1) I do not care about or need any nudity

2) I do not care about involving myself in the mundane tasks of the slave's personal maintenance such as showering, hygiene, nourishment.

3) I only care to interact with and train the slave when the slave is objectified.

I have thought about a detached dwelling with a cage elevator that moved the slave between the basement living quarters to an area where it will be used. Food, personal supplies and such would be dummy waitered down to the living quarters on a regular basis. A free-standing cage in the middle of a room is not the best choice for ongoing and sustained isolation and objectification.

A locked 'cellar door' entrance could be used to move the slave to necessary medical appointments with a custodian when needed. Otherwise, the slave's only means of leaving the basement would be the cage elevator.

Bad Poetry Oh Noetry:

I have noticed an alarming trend of profiles that contain just a bd/sm tinged poem as the person's description. They usually follow a format such as this (I just made this up by the way)

SHE

She roams the land seeking

Alone, and incomplete

Evanescence plays in the distance

I am complex, magickal, brooding, and so alone and incomplete

Like a sock whose mate was lost in the dryer

Like a pot whose lid was lost two moves ago

Like a television without a remote

Like a waffle without syrup

I am alone. So completely alone.

When I read profiles such as this with poems, it conjures up an unflattering image of a hell of double wides, mary chapin carpenter albums, pewter wizards holding crystals aloft, swords purchased from late night television, 'magick' spells and unironic wolf t-shirts.

I understand not everyone is writing a profile to attract me specifically (wouldn't that be nice though?) however I can't be alone in this.

Slavish devotion cuts both ways:

Sometimes I read profiles or meet people who claim to do intense and lasting objectification but I find that their claims are overstated and grandiose. I don't believe doms who claim to have a castle overlooking the sea complete with a dungeon just waiting for the right submissive or slave to enter it. Nor do I believe in claims from slaves that they can endure '24/7 latex encasement'. Skin just does not work that way.

Other people, both slaves and dominants, are just out to find an online 'wank' partner with no intention or plan of realistically carrying out any power exchange dynamic.

Some people are downright psychotic and would cause great injury to themselves or someone else if they actually made their desires real. 

That leaves a very small pool of people. There are not even enough people in the world who need an intense level of control that I require to fill a subway car. I have not had long term objectification experience with many - but I have had quite a bit of experience with a select few. 

Sometimes even this recalcitrant objectifier gets romantic pangs of wanting to unhood a slave, put her into nice clothes and take her out to an interesting restaurant, a good movie, or even a horseback tour of the many mountain trails that are abundant in this area. I really enjoy taking people to enjoy new experiences and showing them around.

However the major component of a dom's control is self control. To serve me, a slave needs to be faceless, voiceless, and trained to be an extension of my will and kept in a way so it remains focused on my needs and desires and not drawn off task by distractions from the environment. A slave needs to be kept this way even when it is not convenient to do so. 

In my experience, relaxing standards leads to sloppiness and confuses the slave. 'Dating' a slave causes anxiety and uncertainty when the chains have to go back on afterwards. It is the experience of this dom that it is much easier for the slave to maintain a small, defined space and role.

I enjoy chatting and sometimes message a profile that stands out - or has urbane interests similar to mine. Or perhaps I am commenting on a well-written journal. I have had some enjoyable exchanges during my short stay here. 

However contacting people on this site sometimes feels like the digital equivalent of knocking on a stranger's door at four in the morning. I imagine brows furrowed behind a cascade of locks as someone peeps out a hole at me wondering what it is I want. 

I am selective and if I contact you, you stand out in some way and I always write a letter in response to something stated in your journal, profile, or interests.

Gimpin' aint easy

I uploaded some pictures of a doll I made this past weekend. Skin doesn't do well in latex 23 hours out of a day so I dressed it in mostly textile overnight and kept latex reserved for day use. The zentai wasn't opaque enough so I added a darlex hood from Winterfetish for added security to preserve 'the gimpiness'. 

I relented a bit and allowed the gimp doll to sleep in a bed but I generally do not allow it on furniture. 

I had two people ask about equipment I use so I thought a list of vendors for objectification/dolling I have used in the past would be helpful to save me from re-typing:

Hoods -

• latex nemesis. She makes hoods with smoked vinyl inserts in the eyes so that eyes cannot be seen. 
• kink engineering makes a laser cut hood that looks completely solid. The Doll of Shangri-la wears this.

Body -

For training and extended play you will need zentai. In the past I have purchased from bodyweaver. Stick with plain solid colors as this is just going to be the 'skin' of your naked doll. Also it's less expensive and more easily sized than other options if your doll is still in the exploratory phase of her development. 

Libidex has an 'express' service that often deeply discounts latex suits. 

Accessories

Gags - dolls do not speak and often need reinforcement to break them of old habits. A clean pair of underpants is almost always the right size to be fit into a mouth. The mouth can then be covered with 3m microfoam tape or paper surgical tape. Avoid duct tape since your doll will be hooded and the tape won't be seen anyway.

Church of Sinvention sells novel immobilizing splints that limit the doll's ability to move. Being restricted in some way helps the doll mentally cross over into the right headspace. 

Objectification:

People have asked about this enough that I thought it would be wise to write up the last scene that I have done. 

She was made to dress in black velvet zentai that covered her entire body with the exception of an opening at the mouth. The opening was to allow a black latex hood with a mouth sheath to be fitted on her. There were no eyes in the hood and just two nose holes and her mouth was filled with the latex sheath and would not be able to talk from this point. I plugged in a gag that filled the sheath and locked it on to her head. From this a lead was attached to help guide her since she was unable to now see.

Under the zentai she was made to wear sheathed latex shorts that penetrated her. A chastity belt was put on her and small dildos were guided into her body. 

Her hands were placed into mitts and she was led to her position and chained to an area near the floor where I would be sitting. Nobody was permitted to touch the doll with the exception of a trusted female who facilitated breaks every two hours for her. I don't like to mess with dolls once they are dressed. 

Hard Limits: Treason, murder above 2nd degree, espionage

Why do people put 'kids' as a hard limit? I am hoping that means that the person is seeking a child-free mate and not involving kids in a scene. Has this been an ongoing issue? Why put something that is already illegal, immoral and unethical in your profile as a limit? 

"I hate you already"

I understand people get worn down from one-liner emails from a person who has one hand on his tumescent member and another on the keyboard. However if your profile reflects the exhaustion and despair you feel; just stop! The one-liners do nothing but throw a handful of spaghetti at the wall just to see what sticks. They do not read your profile anyway. 

When your profile lists everything you hate and how disappointed you are in this site, life, etc - then people who would otherwise take time to get to know you and might be a good match for you will shrug their shoulder and move on.

Just a tip from your friendly dominant. 

Country for Old Men

I noticed that 'old men' seem to be in high demand around here. I am not sure what the reason why might be.

So I looked at different types of profiles today.

Slave contracts are not real. They are not enforceable by any statutory or regulatory body on earth and presenting one to a submissive makes you look like a bogan.  Also if you are a dom who likes to write them, don't start out with "By singing this contract. . ." even if your spellchecker says it's okay.