Tolerance, Patience, Control... how often do you see these words repeated in the profiles of both doms and subs on this site. I sometimes wonder if I am greatly mistaken about the nature of Dominance and Submission. So much of this lifestyle seems driven by pointless hositlity and aggression mixed with sexual tension or base sexual gratification.
I have given this a great deal of thought and my conclusion is that in a pure form Dominance is Submission. They are or should be one and the same, to serve a master and be bound to him or her is to simultaneously bind them. What is dominance, bondage and discipline (in whatever form it takes) other than an extreme expression of bodyworship. The submissive gives their body and trust, the Dom is responsible for everything beyond that point. To truely be dominant is to undertake physical and intellectual responsibility for the submissive who serves you. Dominance requires thought, planning, time and energy. The physical self of the submissive is little more than the vehicle through which the Dom and the Submissive grow together and discover themselves. Thus, the ultimate goal of a dominant submissive relationship is the gestalt between the participants.
Done haphazardly dominance is little more than barking orders, knot tying, and inflicting pain sprinkled with fetish gear and sex. In the end this approach would seem pointless and unfulfilling to all but the most shallow. Perhaps, there is something to be said for this in terms of simple roleplay or fetishistic behaviors.
Ultimately, I feel that Dominance and Submission are pathways to a deeper intimacy. It is this connection that I am seeking more than just physical gratification or having my ego massaged. It is for this reason that I wonder if perhaps I am mistaken about this lifestyle. Until I develop a better understanding, I shall continue seeking both inspiration and enlightenment...