The everyday practice of worship and service

I’m a very fortunate person, in more ways than one, but specifically in the sense of being submissive to women. You see I naturally worship women and given that they constitute more than half of the human race I feel great abundance in this area of my life! For me worship and service to women is an everyday practice, its a way of life and I’ve reached the point where I relate to all women this way even though in most cases its very subtle.

I’ve come to realize more and more how powerful it actually is to relate to another human being through the act of worship. Many people react to this word but my use of the term in this context means to hold sacred. The danger of worshiping another person is that it can lead to disempowerment for oneself and projecting an ideal onto the other person which they cannot live up to. This is not true worship. True worship is an empowered action and can only be practiced by someone in his power because disempowered worship is really more a kind of dependence or manipulation, more about getting something from the person being worshiped. Empowered worship however needs nothing in return, it is simply the act of seeing someone in their highest most beautiful aspect and seeing them as sacred. This includes their imperfections which are seen as unique qualities or expressions of the feminine. The way I achieve empowered worship is by having an inner relationship with the feminine or the Goddess so that when I worship women what I’m worshiping is not something separate from me. I simply see women as a powerful external manifestation of the Goddess energy which I also have within.

The beauty of this is that its absolutely opposite of the patriarchal way of relating to women so it serves to counteract the still prevalent disrespect and devaluing that women endure. As men we can choose to deeply honor and respect women for their incredible beauty, wisdom, power and creativity. We can worship them by seeing these qualities and intentionally focusing on them. We can serve them by respecting and supporting their power and realizing that in many ways women have unique gifts which are very much needed in the world today.

This kind of relationship with women is a significant part of my purpose in life and it involves many different elements including simple rituals like bowing down and kissing a woman’s feet. Foot worship is a very powerful way to worship a lady and express one’s surrender to the feminine. I also value various kinds of service as an expression of devoting my time and energy to making women’s lives easier and supporting what they have to do, something which women have done for men for centuries so why shouldn’t we return the favor. Much of my practice of worship and service is very subtle and most of the time women don’t even know its happening. It can be as simple as offering encouragement or praise or going out of my way to do a female friend a favor.

The point of this is that I take great passion in worshiping and serving women and the expression of this passion is the gift that I have to offer. The stories I’ve heard over and over again from the women in my life at how they have been treated disrespectfully by men and often abused breaks my heart. Not just for the women but for the men too because men who mistreat women are very unhappy creatures and they don’t realize what an incredible gift women are. Part of my work involves encouraging dominance in women and submissiveness in men in subtle ways and its very rewarding work as it helps create a beautiful dynamic that can transform the energy between the sexes.

Who needs labels?

I've been submissive to Women all my life but its only been in the last couple of years that I've fully admitted and embraced that part of myself. Even though I've been into kink in various forms for over 20 years I never fully accepted the subby part of me. I tend to be an independent even dominant person in how I live my life and in my reactions to authority but when it comes to Women its a different story. When I really reflect on it, Women have been dominating me to varying degrees for most of my life. I bring out the dominance in Women and I'm seeing this play out now in my latest housemate situation where I live with four Women. None of these Women are kinky or openly dominant but I notice their dominant qualities increasing especially in relationship to me and its incredibly gratifying even in such a subtle situation.

Now that I'm more directly exploring my submissiveness I'm finding there are many more ways to express it than I ever realized. I've never been someone who likes labels in relationships and we certainly have plenty of those in the kink community….Mistress, Domme, sub, slave, service sub, top, bottom, fetishist etc etc etc. These labels mean different things to different people which creates confusion but even when two people agree on the meaning of their labels within a relationship it can still create limitations and expectations which create problems. We might find we're trying to live up to a label rather than being ourselves or trying to be the sub our partner wants us to be rather than what feels natural. What I'm finding now is that at least for me maybe the labels aren't so necessary. My submissiveness is a natural part of my personality and how I relate to Women and it never feels very good to try to label it and put it in a box. When I refrain from doing that it is just naturally expressed in a given situation with a given person in just the way that feels right. Some would say you need labels to define roles so people know the boundaries of the relationship and what is acceptable or not. However I find that good communication is really all thats needed and that doesn't require putting things in a box. When I am least submissive is when I am trying to play a role and not really being myself.

Letting go of the labels allows me for the first time to see how I might be able to reconcile my independent warrior side with my deeply submissive side. If I don't have to fit into the role of a stereotypical sub or slave I'm free to create my own way of doing it that fits me perfectly and attract Women who feel drawn to that. I pretty much live a life of service to Women even though few of them realize it besides those whom I openly serve. I love serving and worshipping Women, its the most gratifying thing in life to me. This service comes from my devotion to the Goddess and I always consider Her my true Mistress. What this means in practice though is that I live from the heart which is where the Goddess speaks to me. This can make it difficult to submit in the traditional way to a Mistress because she can never be the absolute authority in my life. However if I let go of the traditional way of doing it the problem goes away. Its been in trying to live within a predefined role that I've had the most trouble in D/s connections.

My point in all this is that whether you are a male sub or a Female Domme or just exploring these roles be careful of identifying too strongly with any of the labels or focusing too much on how other people do it. I'm not saying we shouldn't use them at all, they can't be completely avoided nor should they but its important to know their limitations. The one absolute truth I embrace in the kink community is there is no right way of doing anything in this lifestyle. We can only come into our true fulfillment when we become what we are as unique individuals. If I do that then I can be a unique flavor of submissive that exists no where else which means I'm offering all I have to the community. Difference is good, it makes it rich and interesting. We don't need to judge or evaluate each other on our differences but instead celebrate them and marvel at how cool it is to see our fellow kinksters doing it their way. Do we really want a bunch of people all doing things the same way or trying to be just like each other? Lame!