flutterbykisses

What I’ve been told about the lifestyle. Yes, some of this I can understand and believe but other things I don’t understand and or believe.

Respect is NOT something one can demand from someone. It is something that is earned regardless of who it is coming from or being given to.
Fear is the only thing that can be taken from someone.
There is a reason for every word in the lifestyle.
A girl is an un-owned sub of any type. They address themselves as girl because a sub is not allowed to own anything, not even an identity that I not giver to her by her Dom/Master Domme/Mistress.
I am known as girl. There is no I or me. This is too show that I am a blank slate for her Master to mold.
There are 5 roles in a subs life.
A Dom or Domme fills 3 of them-
1. Protector
2. Guide
3. Lover
A Master or Mistress fills all 5 roles in the life of their slave.
1. Protector
2. Provider
3. Guide
4. Confident
5. Lover
In that order
A Master wanted to be involved in EVERY aspect of His subs life. He takes every opportunity to teach his girl(s).
A Dom does not- a Dom is still learning the lifestyle. To them it is all about me me me. A lot of Dom’s expect their girl(s) to work while they sit at home. They have not yet learned that by letting their sub support them they are in fact submitting to them. A Dom does not worry about being a friend to their sub. A lot of times is insecure and won’t let her talk to anyone else.
A Master wants His girl(s) to know they can talk to Him about anything anytime. Trust IS a two way street. NEVER forget that.
When doing a scene or skit so to speak, whether, It be bondage or pain or whatever the Master will give the sub a safe word. A Dom rarely uses safe words and those not really IN the lifestyle do not know what safe words are.
When used the safe word stops everything period but before getting to that point the Master has to trust the sub to actually USE it. A lot of girls have a tendency to reach their limit and let the person push them past it because they don’t want to disappoint the Dom or Master. A Master will not get to that point unless He trusts the girl to use the safe word. He doesn’t want her to get hurt and pushing will do that.
A girl should use the safe word when she reaches her limit or when the session starts to get too intense.
The purpose of the session is supposed to be for the sub, her comfort should be paramount. If she starts to get overwhelmed she uses the safe word.
Even if she is scared she should use the safe word this proves to her that the Master can be trusted to stop.
If a girl is not comfortable in a session why would she want to do another one? A Master understands this. What it boils down to is a Dom wants to do whatever whenever until his girl(s) leave him. A Master understands that without His girl(s) He has no one to dom so He is thankful to have them.
The Master can call a session whenever He chooses. A sub has the choice to participate or not. A slave has no choice.
So the Dom is just on a power trip then? Most of the time that is exactly what it is, they are like a kid in a candy store. Want their collar on every neck, no consideration for dealing with what they are taking responsibility for.
There are 4 levels of submission and 4 types of submissives.
Types are
1. Switch
2. Submissive
3. Slave
4. Pet
Submission level is a combination of trust, respect and to a certain extent love. Regardless of what the Dom says a sub cannot be made into a slave. The sub decides their level.
Levels of submission are
1. Bedroom
2. Household
3. Total submission
4. Total power exchange
Bedroom and household- the sub is whatever type is agreed upon.
Total submission- sub is submissive always.
Switch- they can dom someone more submissive than them but submit to someone stronger.
Submissive- has some say in what she will or won’t do. She will check with her Dom for his input before doing things but will make the final say.
Slave- does what they are told when they are told how they are told to do it.
Pet- identifies with a certain animal, be it puppy kitten horse pig whatever, they wander the house just like that animal. Limited to the noises of that animal, eat out of a bowl. Anyone in the house can do whatever whenever to them.
With total submission she is submissive in every aspect of her life.
When the Dom suggests an activity the submissive can choose not to participate it is her right BUT she should choose carefully what she chooses not to participate in. if she refuses too often she may find herself looking for a new Master.
A submissive does not require constant supervision. She can be given a task and expected to carry it out in the time given. She can refuse to do things but shouldn’t do it often.
A slave requires constant supervision to ensure a task is done and done right.
Liking someone and trusting someone are very different.
A Master should be much better and ready to prove themselves with their knowledge of the lifestyle.
Punishment is meant to ensure a certain habit doesn’t happen again.
Apologies imply knowledge something is wrong but keep doing it anyways.