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Male Submissive, 31
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Male Dominant, 36
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About eldrad
About my handle. Old Hippy was taken so elderly radical (Eldrad) came to mind. Get it? I'm a tall, goodlooking, respectful, seldom respectable, demented, deranged, licentious, lecherous, libidinous, assertive, alliterative, teacher. I've seldom met a bookstore I didn't like. Got any event horizon jokes? Kinky astronomers, this is your chance. I am seeking a smart, good looking woman in reasonable or sort of reasonable shape who craves life outside the norm. I want a coconspirator, not a victim. At least not a victim in the ethical sense. I want someone willing to allow a relationship to evolve into something deeper. D/s fades to enlightenment? I was born trailer trash and adopted at birth by rich church people. I am the poorest relative I have. I recently learned of my long-suspected Native American ancestry. Maybe that explains my attitude and my ponytail. Politically I am well to the left of correct. I have been known to spank Republicans. Birthers, bare your bottoms and take note. Repressed reactionaries, tell me your Sarah Palin fantasies. I have deadhead and Obama stickers on my Mini Cooper. SUVs with W stickers have tried to run me off the road. My Nascar moment. Maybe the Obama sticker violates their sense of Aryan entitlement. Back to the main subject, this is about power exchange isn't it? A more apt expression might be power squared.. A relationship on steroids. Minus the roid rage?Negotiation can be the hottest foreplay. "Knowing that you are about to be hanged concentrates the mind wonderfully." Samuel Johnson. FWIW, Samuel Johnson died of old age in a palace. I am looking for a brainiac eager to collaborate in her surrender. Why are you sitting down so carefully at dinner? We have our secrets. I eat out a lot. I don't go to Burger King. I prefer plusher seats for your blemished ass. I pay close attention to the local music scene wherever I am. Right now that is central Ohio. If you want to be a rock and roll star around here you have to pass your SATs. It has been, in order of preference, LA, Dayton, Anchorage, Boulder, Ann Arbor, Baltimore and Toledo. My apologies to Lucas County, but the rock and roll sucks. The symphony is pretty good.
I have made my living teaching in corporate aircraft, cruising sailboats and over the road trucks. I am a reassuring in presence in stressful situations.. I am serious bookworm and an occasional wannabe gearhead. If we seem to be going in compatible directions please say hello. A good assistant would serve me coffee while I listen to All Things Considered. A good road sub would have maps handy for our weekend cruise. A good brainiac sub/gearhead would come away from the hot rod show properly filthy A good brainiac culture vulture sub would be naked under her evening gown so I to fondle her welts.
Skeert yet? |
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Leaving sex to the feminists is like letting your dog vacation at the taxidermist. Camille Paglia
“Everything in woman is a riddle, and everything in woman has one solution—that is pregnancy. Man is for woman a means: the purpose is always the child. But what is woman for man?
“A real man wants two things: danger and play. Therefore he wants woman as the most dangerous plaything. Man shall be educated for war, and woman for the recreation of the warrior: all else is folly
Nietzsche
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Life is like Sanskrit read to a pony.
Lou Reed
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Confession: If there is a bookshelf in your picture I always blow it up untill i can see what you are reading. |
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"The whipping therapy becomes much more efficient when a patients receives the punishment from a person of the opposite sex. The effect is astounding: the patient starts seeing only bright colors in the surrounding world, the heartache disappears, although it will take a certain time for the buttocks to heal, of course," Sergei Speransky told the Izvestia newspaper. |
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"A sore but is the gift that keeps on giving."
The Disciplined Feminist http://disciplinedfeminist.blogspot.com/
"it's science bitch" is the equation that hypothesized cosmic background radiation. It's existence was proven with a NASA probe, thereby going from theory into fact and pissing off the creationists.
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I see a lot about what is called "natural order". That phrase has some unfortunate connotations, racial and otherwise. I am utterly feminist on my political and personal outlook. One of feminism's central tenets is choice.
If you are here and you describe yourself as submissive or slave, that is a choice that you have consciously made. You wish to surrender agreed upon aspects of your life in the context of an ethical relationship.
I have usually had pretty intense relationships. D/s brings structure to that intensity.
"There is no more lively sensation than that of pain, its impressions are certain and dependable, they never deceive as may those of the pleasure women perpetually feign and almost never experience." Marquis de Sade |
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A quote I particularly like.
"In a world where slavery is consensual and voluntary there can only be one major difference between slave and free inner need, for inner fulfillment"
"The Freedom of Consensual Slavery"
http://tinyurl.com/ns3lkw |
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This is a cut and paste, but is is funny
Tall and ugly, missing a few teeth, real fat, claim to have a job, seeking someone to meet for one-way use in the back of a van every couple weeks when my wife is out playing church bingo. Hell, I even do the uglies and fatties that no one else wants, cuz they don't offer any resistance! I used to be a cop and I know you chicks dig that, so if you're a badge bunnie, I especially want to hear from you. I have a picture that is 15+ yrs old but it will give you an idea of what I was like in my glory days. Will occasionally bottom and have a thing for short women wearing a strap-on and climbing on top of me and taking me that way. |
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Slave- ?one that is completely subservient to a dominating influence.? Merriam Webster
"A sore bottom is a gift (that keeps on giving...?). It's a precious gift from my partner that demonstrates the love and commitment he has for our relationship"
The Disciplined Feminist http://disciplinedfeminist.blogspot.com/
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I was asked to read the books of Gor. On the surface they seem hokey. Think 15 year old C student on a testerone binge. That said, it is a codified set of protocols that seem feasible. The slave positions look to be connected to some sort of neural feedback loop. It is a portable fetish, meaning basic standards are universal. It is still utterly hokeyish.
Micromanagement? . |
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Has anybody realized what "tea bagging" means in certain circles??
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I have been reading again about Sally Hemmings and Thomas? Jefferson. The story raises a lot of questions about? forms of servitude.
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An interesting? view from a sub feminist.
?? http://disciplinedfeminist.blogspot.com/2007/01/virtues-of-sore-bottom.html
? Another? interesting take
? http://vanilla-not.com/dominantvoices/domtype.html
?
The Equalitarian Dominant is one
who controls by teaching, mentoring and leading. This Dominant
feels and knows that when they find a comparable submissive
that things will happen as a progression of the interaction.
Usually just a mention or short learning situation is necessary
to obtain a certain interaction. Both the Dominant and the submissive
"get it", need very little, so called "training"
and naturally know what the other needs after interaction. This
Dominant does not like the situation of constantly repeating
and forcing a particular behavior (submission) to occur. It
is not the activities but the surrender as the result of the
Domination that is the objective and enjoyment. Creativity is
an important part of this situation. These are the more intellectual,
into the philosophy/psychology mechanism of this lifestyle.
They understand the concepts and resultant interactions and
can put it into real life. They do not need many "rules"
like the Democratic type , nor do they like the heavy S&M
activities; preferring submission to occur as a result of an
instilled desire in the submissive to surrender. She "wants"
to as a result of the Dominant's knowledge and skill at Dominating.
Sensuousness is the rule and pain is given and received as a
form of sensuous stimulation. Light pain as opposed to severe.
Sensuous torture is a popular activity in this area. Both the
Dominant and the submissive must be naturally this way. These
are the ones who claim to be born this way, have always been
this way. They fully understand the concept of D/s - it comes
to them naturally and easily. They attract a submissive who
truly and naturally wants to please, and who will observe and
sense what the dominant is communicating; and be able to translate
that into the right thing to do. The doing or saying without
having to be told type. The submissives beg easily and surrender
sweetly. They understand the concept of respect and surrender
and can make it happen after initial learning with little or
no additional instructions. They embrace the surrender gratefully
and lovingly. These individuals usually form the most intimate
of relationships, the closest. There is not much downside to
these relationships, because they not only grasp the concepts,
but can make it happen too; and their attraction is based on
strong mutual respect. Their strong relationship is not readily
apparent to the unobservant, but they are always subtly in the
24-7 mode. The fact that these things come forth naturally and
without the need for orders or rules are a great affirmation
and source of pride, satisfaction and loving. Just as the strictness
and forbearance without the need for orders or rules of the
Authoritarian/Totalitarian situation affirms pride, satisfaction
and loving.
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Science is a lot like sex. Sometimes something useful comes of it, but that's not the only reason we're doing it.
???????????? - Richard Feynman -
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I like what she says.
"Respecting women's intelligence and treating them like women should not
be thought of as mutually exclusive ways of thinking. Deep down, we
want to be taken care of and be your woman, but we don't want to feel that you're putting us beneath you."? http://tinyurl.com/b6p8ww
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One quick note re poly. Higher mathematics escapes me.
"Only two things are infinite, the universe and human stupidity, and I'm not sure about the former." --Albert Einstein
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You will probably notice a second picture on here. It isn't me. Someone had made fun of old guys with long hair and I tried to send her a picture of Iggy Pop, who just turned 60. Wrong button and all that stuff, it ended up here. At first they told me that the pic had been rejected. Then they said sorry, the pic is OK. Now this f_^&ing program won't get rid of it. That's so twentieth century. |
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I ran across an interesting article in Yahoo that talks about the mindset of some subs.?
"Masochists, Baumeister believes, are taking a breather from the growing burden of selfhood.
Baumeister, professor of psychology at Case Western Reserve University in Cleveland, reports that his analysis of the writings of masochistic men and women reveal consistent themes that run counter to usual human strivings:"
It's the ultimate break from thoroughly modern stresses on the self.
You've got a respectably high-powered job. Maybe it's even visible one. You are regularly making difficult decisions that affect the lives of others, perhaps many others. You need to maintain a highly polished self-image. You like to feel in personal control. You're constantly advancing your independence, your responsibility, your success.
So how do you take a break? If you're like an unknown number of others, perhaps you've already signed up for a spanking.
Across the country, from sophisticated cities to subdued suburbs, men and women are acting out fantasies of sexual domination and submission. With their own partners or specially hired ones, they're turning to rituals of sadomasochism. To borrow their own favorite term, they've happily become "sex slaves" to their submissive desires.
These are people--a minority of both sexes--who desire to be tied up, handcuffed, gagged, or bound in uncomfortable positions; adults who desire to be whipped or tormented with droplets of hot wax on bare skin. Some write longingly of receiving "an old-fashioned, bare-bottom, over-the-knee spanking." Others desire to be embarrassed, verbally insulted, given commands, made to walk on all fours like a dog, or displayed naked in front of others who are fully clothed.
"The mainstream mild submissive will have one or two favorites," psychologist Roy E Baumeister, Ph.D., reports. For many people, submission goes no further than wanting to make love blindfolded once in a while.
Have they thoroughly lost their minds? Probably not, contends Baumeister. At a symposium on "Bizarre Behavior: The Social Animal at the Outer Limits," psychologists learned what has previously eluded behavioral experts of all stripes: how to make sense of sadomasochism. Masochists, Baumeister believes, are taking a breather from the growing burden of selfhood.
Relief From the Needy Self
Why would anyone want to escape awareness of the self? Because while a self is a handy, even a necessary, thing to have, it's also very needy. It requires constant upkeep and maintenance. You have to work hard just to maintain a positive self-image. Or "to be in control."
"Modern Western culture has placed enormous and unprecedented demands on individual selfhood," Baumeister observes. "The self is an unending project, throughout life, that constantly needs to be built up and defended. It has to prove capable and autonomous and attractive, along with everything else. As such it is a source of stress, and hence worry and pressure."
And if there's one thing stress research has taught us, it's that any respite from vulnerability is a good thing.
Baumeister, professor of psychology at Case Western Reserve University in Cleveland, reports that his analysis of the writings of masochistic men and women reveal consistent themes that run counter to usual human strivings:
o Loss of control---captured in bondage fantasies, involving devices like ropes, handcuffs, and gags.
o Humiliation--the elaborate, exquisitely detailed humiliations masochists desire (spanking is just the beginning) signify abandonment of the pursuit of self-esteem.
o Pain--normally something the self goes to great lengths to avoid, but sought out by masochists; a great destructor from self-reflection.
If masochism is about contradicting one's identity, then socioeconomic status reveals masochists for what they are. "Masochists seem to be drawn largely from the privileged classes," Baumeister finds. They are above average in education and income. "Society's real victims do not seek out masochistic sex. Rather it is often the rich, powerful, and successful, the people with the heaviest burdens of selfhood, who need the escape of masochism."
Of course, masochists are not really out to ditch their selves. Nor do they want to be sex slaves in reality. They want the fantasy of shedding their own identity, with its autonomy and responsibility, and submitting entirely to the will of another.
With sexual pleasure thrown into the bargain--because it's a great reinforcer of submissive acts. "Studies of actual couples who practice these things suggest that total full-time sexual slavery is fairly impractical and therefore relatively uncommon," Baumeister reports.
Fantasies of sexual submission turn out to be particularly common among women, more so than among men, even though men engage in more masochistic practices than women. (Then again, men engage more in most forms of unusual sexual behavior.)
Women Are Not Masochistic
But that is not grist for that old Freudian canard that femininity is masochistic. Instead, Baumeister believes, submission is essentially feminine, one version--a cartoon one, at that--of a feminine ideal. Consider these findings:
o One common masochistic fantasy involves symbolic sex change--and given the rootedness of identity in gender, there's no clearer way to shed an identity than by changing gender. But the sex change is always one way: from male to female, never from female to male.
o Up to a third of all women may have fantasies of being dominated sexually (although few act them out).
That's why Baumeister thinks female masochistic fantasies hold the key to understanding submissive behavior in general. "If anything, female masochists desire to be turned into an extreme caricature version of femininity, something far removed from their normal selves."
A common female masochistic fantasy is submission based on having one's body displayed to others. One of Baumeister's favorite--perhaps apocryphal--stories is that of a woman whose husband threw her a birthday party, inviting lots of people. She was posed nude and spread-eagle on the hors d'oeuvre table. Every party-goer who reached for a cracker or the vegetable dip had to reach across her bare self.
The audience factor, observes Baumeister, drives home the point of the entire enterprise: There's nothing like other people's attention to dramatize the transformation of self. Not only is this form of attention contrary to the standard adult role, but "it crosses some sexual boundary, as in doing something you object to."
Maybe you have masochistic fantasies that contain some new kind of sex act. Or a first homosexual experience. Or something highly degrading. And that is exactly the point -- the shocking degree to which you can, with a little imagination, shed your normal self.
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I have joked with a few members here about bizarre messages from dating sites. I stumbled across this one. Is it insonmia or is this just weird? I hope it's not an acid flashback.
I WILL LIKE TO KNOW U VERY WELL BCOS AM HERE FOR NICE WOMAN TO MARRIED HERE PLS TRY TO BE FAITHFUL TO ME SO AM NOT FOR LIES HERE BUT IF I CAN BE GETTING A GOOD NICE BABE HERE I WILL JUST HAPPY AND THANKS GOD THAT GIVE ME THE TYPE OF THE WOMAN |
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I don't do titles. I'm too political for that. Didn't someone start a revolution over titles?
"I have known a German Prince with more titles than subjects, and a Spanish nobleman with more names than shirts. - Oliver Goldsmith ..." |
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I've been getting a fair amount of notes complimenting me on my profile. Why are they always from somewhere else? I want a girlfriend. Help! |
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I just finished a book called "The Pleasure's all Mine" by Joan Kelly. A PC (politically correct) submissive. Wow |
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Went to hear a jamband in Yellow Springs this weekend. Years ago someone described Yellow Springs as the home of avant guarde carpenters, revolutionary potters and angry young vegetarians. Nothing has changed.
If you're really bored Google George Bush 666.
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"the early bird may get the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese"
Willy Nelson |
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Some impertinent person calling herself submissive questioned how a person of my political views could be here. What don't I have that George has except Laura's unblemished ass? Reflect on that.
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After looking through some ads I wonder why some people have such a low opinion of themselves that they don't even spell correctly. If you got paddled in school it was probably because you deserved it. You have a spell checker. Use It. Grrr..... |
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I went to hear Commander Cody and his Lost Planet Airmen in Dayton last night. They are every bit as 60's as the name implies. Gleefully unrepentant.They come from Yellow Springs, Ohio and Ann Arbor, two of the coolest towns in Amerika. |
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Male Dominant, 25
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Male Dominant, 63, Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
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Male Dominant, 31, Athens
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Male Switch, 46, Fredericksburg, Virginia
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Male Switch, 31, Ontario
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Male Submissive, 62, SW Florida, Florida
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Male Dominant, 58, Denver, Colorado
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Male Dominant, 53
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Male Dominant, 40, cork
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Male Switch, 29, New York
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Male Dominant, 69, Woodstock, New York
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Male Dominant, 49
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