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Sakura

Cryptorchid

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Cryptorchid

Cryptorchid - photo 1
Cryptorchid - photo 2
Cryptorchid - photo 3

"Through me the way into the suffering city, Through me the way to the eternal pain, Through me the way that runs among the lost. Justice urged on my high artificer; My maker was divine authority, The highest wisdom, and the primal love. Before me nothing but eternal things were made, And I endure eternally. Abandon every hope, ye who enter here."



Well, I’ve lived in California all my life, born and raised, live with my boyfriend in a small house with my kitties. Though I do have a significant other, I am constantly plagued with the passion for more... exciting things. He is not in “the lifestyle” nor would he want to be... and so my fantasies and such go untouched leaving me with a sense of “I want more then this ... I need more then this.” I long to be tamed, trained, needed by someone who will test my limits and drive me over the edge. I am in a situation though, I’m sure you can see, because I am committed to someone, and yet have the desire to learn and experience new things beings we’ve been in a very long relationship.. I guess I’m just not sure what to do. I have a passion for art and animals, a pagan at heart; I absolutely love the outdoors and nature. I am a freelance photographer as well as a worker in the corporate world of web design. My imagination is larger then life and it just seems to never stop creating. Perhaps that’s why I spend countless hours building web pages, doing graphic design, role-playing, anything to make life seem more interesting. Just to make it clear, I am completely untrained and rather inexperienced in this life style but am very willing and anxious to learn. I guess what I’m looking for is someone to teach me, get to know me, and then see where things go. I am “gothic” by appearance with a fetish for body piercing, industrial music, and the darker, magical side of things.

heh

"Dried Up, Tied And Dead To The World"

You cut off all of your fingers, Trade them in for dollar bills. Cake on some more make-up to Cover up all those lines. Wake up and stop shaking, Cuz you're just wasting time . 

Don't you want some of this? Don't you need some of this? 

You take but cannot be given. You ride but cannot be ridden. Pinch this tiny heart of mine. Wrap it up in soiled twine. You never read what you've written.

I'll be your lover, i'll be forever. I'll be tomorrow, i am anything when i'm high. 

Don't you want some of this? Don't you need some of this? 

You shove your hair down my throat. I feel your fingers in me. Tear this bitter fruit to mess, And wrap it in your soiled dress. Now you must spit out the seeds. 

Anything when i'm high  Anything when i'm high. 

All dried up and tied up forever All fucked up and dead to the world...

See the animal in the cage that you built. Are you sure what side you're on. Better not look him to closely in the eye, are you sure what side of the glass you are on.  See the safety of the life you have built, everything where it belongs. Feel the hollowness inside of your heart, and its all right where it belongs. 

 

What if everything around you isn't quite as it seems. What if all the world you think you know, is an elaborate dream. When you look at your reflection, Is that all you wanted to be.What if you could look right through the cracks, would you find yourself, find yourself afraid to see.

 

What if all the world's inside of your head, just creations of your own. Your devils and your gods are the living and the dead,  And you’re really all alone

 

You can live in this illusion, You can choose to believe, You keep looking but you can't find the words, Are you hiding in the trees?

 

What if everything around you isn't quite as it seems. What if all the world you think you know, is an elaborate dream. When you look at your reflection, Is that all you wanted to be.What if you could look right through the cracks, would you find yourself, find yourself afraid to see.