Collarspace.com

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Friends:
LilSubbieLost

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Greetings, Masters
Greetings Mistresses
hugsssssss sisters and brothers in bondage

Updating my profile to reflect that i am looking for a girl or two to become involved with my Master. He's gentle so if you're a pain slut don't bother. If interested feel free to message me.

i am a slave. my profile is here for friends to view as well as Male DOMS. Master owns me and doesn't mind sharing but my Daddy Dom is alot more protective. Unless you want friendship or unless you are already friend or Male Dom QUIT LOOKING AT MY PROFILE ! ! ! !


Nobody said life was easy. One just has to take it one day at a time and do the best they can with what they have. Nothing lasts forever and life is too damn short. Dance while you can and don't let what others think stop you from growing. This girl is owned but she is always looking to make new friends in the lifestyle.

Master and i have been married for over 11 years now and i'm not looking to change that and i can't very well wear two collars and won't even try to do so.

We never know what life holds in store for us so please live every day as if you knew tomorrow was never going to come.


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11/30/2011 3:55:46 AM

Why do i bother? i know He's pissed at me for something i did earlier but damn i only get three nights with Him why ignore me? Well FUCK IT i just don't care anymore.  i wish i could just die and not have to deal with anything anymore. i didn't get my birthday spankings. He could have had me all to Himself tonight with no kids home but no He just ignored me and went to bed. Maybe what everyone is saying is right maybe i am being used


8/11/2011 1:12:57 PM

Had another profile on here to try to get a naked cleaning service going but deleted it today due to some people being soo cruel, mean and just absolutely horrible. Didn't their mothers ever teach them that if you don't have anything nice to say not to say anything at all. i guess it's partially my fault for allowing what others think to upset me soo much but i guess that is because deep down i know they're right.


10/15/2009 10:07:49 AM
For those of You who read this and wish to see pics feel free to ask but i will warn you since my computer took a dump i don't have many pics available.

2/6/2009 12:20:41 PM

Things have been quiet here. Drama gone for awhile so that is good. Wrong time of the month to play but hopefully that will be over soon. i'm bored.


7/16/2008 6:59:49 AM
Just a few more days until she gets here. Who knows maybe if all goes well i'll be available soon. Either that or dropping off the face of the earth for awhile.

6/26/2008 6:22:20 PM
i feel safe blogging here. Although many know of it i know few actually read it. Master has his former girl comming to visit again. i pushed it again as i knew she needed to come up but that doesn't make it any easier. There is more i want to write about but fear to in case Master's ex-wife is still fishing. Let's just say i am really really glad legal age of consent in our state is 16 and i know this because i checked with the State Police post in town. i'm also very very happy that Master allows me to play with others because i'm not sure i could handle the situation mentally as it is now otherwise. i know Master's issues are related to the meds He is on but it doesn't help. i still feel like i don't turn Him on anymore. So when i can get others up and off it helps my self esteem a little.

3/27/2008 4:56:59 PM
There is one daddy's girl and her Daddy that keep viewing my profile. They need to stop. i have met Him once and her never nor do i ever want to. i am soo tired of this couple screwing with a friend of mine's head and thinking He can release her yet still reserve the right to insist she follow His orders? That is now how this lifestyle goes either that or i've just been owned by some really reasonable Doms

3/20/2008 10:55:22 AM
Live Journal has done away will all new basic accounts so most of us are striking tomorrow so maybe i'll blog here if i feel the need to blog. i don't blog here much unless it is something that is lifestyle related because i have an online journal and an online diary (will give the link to one or both if anyone wants it just ask). my Master does not require that i blog or write in my journal or diary both are there for me to write my feelings at the time because alot of the time He just doesn't want to hear them.
   Master and i are doing good right now. Like any other couple regardless of vanilla or lifestyle we have had our ups and downs and will continue to do so. Right now things are good other than financially but that is nothing new LOL.

8/14/2007 4:44:36 AM
Once again it has been too long since i've wrote anything. Life has been soo hectic lately i haven't had time to do anything let alone write in a journal. i've been told i'm a natural slave and most of the time i feel it deep in my very soul, unfortunately lately i feel like i do not fit in anywhere. Master and i have been experimenting with the swinger lifestyle but honestly they are too tame for me but the BDSM groups i sometimes go to don't seem to be able to handle the fact that i need to serve regardless of who it is or what is required of me. Sometimes i feel soo alone i've thought of just repressing everything and pretending to be vanilla. i know i won't be happy that way but i'm not happy trying to find where i belong either. Live sucks

4/12/2007 3:53:39 PM
i'm back. It has been soo long since i was here. i was able to give my Master the ultimate gift which basically saved His life. my pic is no longer on here but if someone wants to all they have to do is ask.

9/12/2006 1:17:01 PM
i haven't been feeling very submissive lately let alone like a slave. i've been sick and sleeping alot and Master has been taking care of me when He can. i hate not being able to take care of Him and i'm looking forward to feeling better so i can. Last night and today was better and i was able to watch what i ate and got some exercise in so hopefully i'll be back up to par soon.

9/6/2006 3:38:09 AM
Yesterday was a long and trying day. Master took me to flint to have a test done which was the last test that could have ruled me out as being a donor for Him. i passed with flying colors now all we have to do is get His teeth fixed and for me to lose 25 lbs. Alot of hard work but i know i can do it. The actual test wasn't really that bad but getting preped for it and the after care was horrible. i don't handle iv's well at all and then they had to draw blood. They tried taking the blood from the iv but that hemolized so they had to re-draw it which took three tries each time with the nurse digging around trying to find the vein. Afterwards they had my lying flat on my back for 6 hours. i had to use the bathroom but was unable to use the bedpan so i had to wait till i could get out of bed. i can't remove the pressure dressing till sometime today which i'm probably going to do shortly because it's killing me. Honestly i'm scared to remove it and see what's underneath. They took a catheter up the main artery in my leg so i may have a really bad bruise which wouldn't surprise me since i bruise so easily. i was going to go into work last night but when i told the doctor that He said oh no i wasn't and gave me a doctor's note to excuse me. i know a slave's work is never done but a small break would be nice once in awhile. LOL

9/4/2006 5:40:28 AM
Once again it has been too long since i've been able to write. Alot has happened since June. i spent most of the summer flagging traffic for the road construction crews and of course teasing all those boys out on the road. Then in August i started a new job on midnights which i hate but a girls gotta do what a girls gotta do to take care of her family. My mom has found more lumps in her lungs and kidney that the doctors say are cancerous so now her and my neice that she is guardian of are living with us. Master is doing better but is still in need of a kidney to which i will be giving Him one as soon as i'm able to lose another 23 more lbs which i'm working hard to do.

Why do ppl assume they know me just after asking a few questions? Why do ppl judge others when they don't really know anything about them? This lifestyle is hard enough to find true friends in without the bs that goes along with being judged by ppl not worthy of judging others in the first place.

i do wish to thank all those that have supported me and given me a sounding board when i needed one. i'm praying to hear from a couple ppl in particular a bit more when they have the time.

Until next time
wishes A/all well
calla{MJ}

6/11/2006 1:38:03 PM
My yahoo id of gizmo_816 was stolen. If you used to talk to me on there please message me so i can give You the new id. i've lost soo many contacts/friends because i no longer have control of my old account.

6/7/2006 2:15:46 PM
Well my pic will be back on shortly. i no longer work for the wannabe and i pray to God he gets what's comming to him. A warning to all the subs and slaves out there looking there are some that just want a woman to beat on please be careful and if anyone is curious as to whom i'm speaking of please just ask. As for the Doms and Masters out there looking again please beware there are some that are nothing more than sluts looking to be beat and know nothing of serving and again if You're interested in knowing whom i'm speaking of just ask. i'm doing what i can to get on with my life and undo any damage they were able to do but it's going to take some time and of course the love and support of my Master/Husband.

6/3/2006 2:45:50 PM
God i wish my life wasn't such a soap opera but i guess that's alot of my own fault. i'm at my wits ends because i know my boss (the Dom) is fucking this wannabe sub (who likes to top from bottom) and i see in the future my boss' wife getting hurt emotionally when she finds out about the indiscretion. i care about her alot and don't want to see that happen but can't figure out how to get that lying bitch out of the picture. Any suggestions? i'm willing to try anything right now. 

5/30/2006 6:09:54 PM
My pic has been removed at the request of a Dom i'm working for so that His wife doesn't find out who or what i am. If You wish to see pics of me (some not for children lol) just ask. my Master allows me to show off His property to anyone who wants to see. i'm also aware of a submissive BBW on here who is a liar as well as soon to be homewrecker if she doesn't stop her shit if You're curious who just ask.

5/13/2006 9:00:27 PM
It's going to be a long hard road before i can even think of giving Master one of my kidneys. i have to lose at least 40 lbs and i've managed to lose about 7 so far. i'm not going to stop trying to lose as this is something i want to do more than anything i've ever wanted to do in my life. i'm working hard exercising every day and watching what i eat and the weight is comming off even if it is slowly. i just pray nothing will happen to Him until such time as we can undergo the lifesaving operation. i know He can live a long time on dialysis but truthfully i'm not sure how long He'll want to live on it and i'm not ready to lose Him.

4/27/2006 10:39:54 AM
 Great News

   Master and i went on tuesday for tissue testing to see if i'm a match to give Him a kidney as He is in desperate need of one. We got the call this morning that it's a go i'm a match. i am soo happy i can give Him the ultimate gift of a second chance at a normal life (or normal for us that is lol). The feelings are just totally undescribable i don't think i'm comming back down to earth anytime soon.

4/26/2006 6:24:13 PM
OMG it has been way too long since i've wrote in here. Alot has happened and almost none for the good. For one Master has been diagnosed with End Stage Renal Disease which means without a kidney donation He will be on dialysis for the rest of His life. my mom had to have surgery on her lung to remove a cancerous spot, luckily the doctor says they got it all and she won't need chemo or radiation but it's going to be a long haul till she feels better again. i'm down to working two jobs right now, both for other Masters in the area which makes for some interesting work situations. Keeps me on my toes though even if it does get a bit confusing at times as to whom i'm supposed to listen to. i know what my Master says goes but after that who do i listen to first? Oh what can a lil slave girl do? Doctors say i have to lose at least 40 lbs before they will even consider me as a possible donor and i'm really struggling to do so. Maybe someday soon things will get better.

11/24/2005 7:52:15 PM
Happy Thanksgiving A/all
 
Master and i pray everyone had a wonderful Thanksgiving day. We had both our mothers and His father as well as friends and neices over and i cooked the complete dinner with lots of deserts. So it was a wonderful day even with all the icky snow.

10/25/2005 5:53:55 PM
Alot has changed since Master released His other girl. He has had to have surgery again on His back, i've lost my job and am constantly looking for work or working at the temp agency, there's been problems with the truck and the house but life goes on and things can only get better so i keep pushing on praying it will.

4/15/2005 3:47:36 AM
Well it has been a few months since i last wrote in here and i know that some who care about me are wondering how i'm doing. Well as usual life has been an emotional rollercoaster. Master has decided to stay with me and keep His collar on the one in WV known here on collar me as angelarella. For the most part i'm ok with it except when she comes to visit like she is here now. Then my jealousy and insecurities get out of control and my bad side comes out. That is what i'm dealing with now. i just soo badly want her to go home and leave us alone forever but i know that's not going to happen so i just have to deal with it for now.

1/5/2005 6:36:51 PM
Sorry i have not posted in a long time but life has thrown me for another loop that i'm trying to deal with. Master's online girl came to visit and was here for over a week. i even got to the point that if she could relocate a poly house might actually work then she went back home and all the bs started again. Master has been very very sick and in the hospital again and she just kept saying mean things like she knew i wouldn't keep her informed like Master wanted like i'm some cold hearted bitch. i know she loves Him almost as much as i do so there is no way i could not tell her how He's doing as i know how bad it would hurt not knowing.
   i'm also spreading myself way too thin trying to take care of kids, house, work and be at the hospital for Him. And sometimes i wonder why am i killing myself for Him when i know He is leaving me for another? It's because i do love Him. i've also come to the conclusion that love sucks and hurts way too much to bother with ever again.

11/24/2004 8:03:10 AM
Is it to much to ask for the one who said for better or worse, in sickness and in health, till death do us part to actually love me, and only me, to not have to compete with some other girl miles away for His affection and love? God i have never loved and hated anyone in my life soo much as i do right now. my heart is breaking again more and more each day until i'm scared there will be nothing left except this immense void. i'm sorry Y/you do not come here looking to read profiles where the slave seems so totally emotionally unstable. Please forgive me i just needed to get it out.

11/23/2004 1:53:01 PM
Well i should have listened to my better judgement and just dropped off the face of the earth. i've met with a couple of ppl from here neither of which will come to anything other than bad memories. The time is comming close to when i will be alone and although that scares the hell out of me i'm starting to get used to the idea. who knows maybe i'm meant to be alone. God knows there has been only one strong enough to control me and even He gave up and disappeared. Oh well life goes on even if one doesn't want it to.

11/8/2004 6:17:48 PM
i feel this awful void inside like something has been ripped out and not replaced. i no longer wish to continue living but have no choice as i have children that need me so i will continue to exist nothing more.                              

11/3/2004 5:54:15 PM
well i've decided to keep this profile open just so that i can continue contact with one couple very close to my heart as i have no other way to contact them. Sir D and Sugar You know who You are. Everyone else can leave me alone as Your messages might be read but highly unlikely they will be answered. i'm tired of being hurt but the one's i've opened myself up to and allowed myself to care for so after my husband/Master leaves that's it i'm done. my life will consist of me and my girls and everyone else can go to hell.

10/26/2004 5:12:23 PM
Greetings Masters
Greetings Mistresses
hugsssss sisters and brothers in bondage

this girl has not wrote anything since the move as she has been quite busy unpacking and getting settled and is still working on it but she needed to say this and get it off her chest.

this girl cannot relocate and would never ask anyone to do so for her. she is responsible for three children which she is in no way going to shirk such responsibility. So PLEASE do not contact her if either is a problem as she is tired of reading e-mails that are not worth her time to respond to. Also SirD and Sugar this girl misses You both and prays You are both well.

blessed be
calla

9/10/2004 6:53:04 PM
Well we found a new place to live so hopefully this girl will only be offline till she can get everything switched over to the new place. calla is very grateful for all the support she has received during these trying times for her. Thank You to everyone for their support it means alot to her to have friends like she does within the community.

9/5/2004 7:18:13 AM
Greetings A/all

Please do not message as this girl will not be able to be online for quite awhile after the 13th as she will be not only without a computer but without a home. she wishes to thank A/all for the support she has received from those she has met here.

blessed be
calla

9/1/2004 8:06:19 PM

curls up in a little ball in a corner and covers herself completely with a blankie until all the bad shit stops.


8/31/2004 8:10:01 PM
me slave. Who did i think i was kidding. Not srue what i was thinking must have been walking around in dreamland or something because more than one has shown me i do not have what it takes to be a slave.

8/20/2004 3:36:22 PM

Well once again life has dealt me more shit and i just can't take anymore so i'm dropping off the face of the earth for awhile so please do not be upset if You e-mail me and don't get a response.


8/17/2004 8:03:52 PM
Well this girl had her first experience of scening with a Master who used a single tail whip on her among other things. It was interesting and unforgetable to say the least. she wishes to thank A/all who have touched her heart and soul with Y/your kind words. It has helped her cope with day to day life.

8/9/2004 7:24:15 PM
Things have gotten worse and now I truely mean it Please leave me alone as i am in no emotional condition to deal with anything.

8/8/2004 9:35:23 AM
i know i asked not to be contacted and most have listened. There are a few that have not but i will be eternally gratefull that they chose not to as they have touched my heart and soul, giving me yet another reason to continue learning and growing. Thank You (those of You of whom i'm speaking will know who You are)

7/25/2004 10:37:07 AM
Greetings A/all

  i have chosen not to be with the one's to whom i was under consideration but am also asking to be left alone as i'm in no emotional condition to deal with this at this time.

Thank You
calla

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femslave2006
 
 Age: 20
 Long Beach, California