Bermudadunesdom

I've decided to just look for what's out there and base what side of my dominance comes out based off of my partner's needs.

After all the research and questions in my road to self-discovery I find I have two leanings the daddy-dom who seeks to protect and nurture his companion, and the sadist who delights in the combination of pleasure and pain with a willing sub or slave being the recipient. I have no idea which self or version is stronger as I have had few opportunities to explore either part, and certainly not enough to make a truly informed decision.

I have been to one training session about bondage and seen some interesting exbitions and interactions from practicing members of the scene when I visited a fetish club in San Diego. I have even been to a couple of meetings where I talked to fellow bondage enthusiasts. When I was at the club I got to give and experience my first flogging. No blood of course but both ends were fun. The rest of my info comes from books, sites, and playing online, as well as my reaction to fetish porn and movies with even a hint of bondage in it.

My writing even started  reflecting my growing hunger for bondage and roleplaying. I found myself writing erotic stories and poetry. It has led to a string of relationship with strippers online because every time I even mention my hidden desires to a girl, even a friend they look at me as if I am strange or soemthing, and that's without even going into heavy detail on my fantasies.

Where I live it's hard to find a woman to play with. I'm having trouble even finding a munch out here anymore.