I KNOW YOU NEED ME.
I CAN GIVE YOU WHAT YOU NEED.
I KNOW YOU ARE OUTTHERE, SOMEWHERE.
I WILL TRAIN YOU.
I WILL PROTECT YOU.
I WILL PUNISH YOU WHEN YOU NEED IT.
I WILL TAKE CARE OF YOU.

I AM ALSO A MASSAGE THERAPIST WILLING TO REWARD YOU WITH A MASSAGE, TAKE IT OR LEAVE IT.