Aedinesidhe

I just noticed the CS doesn't update age. I am 39.

Due to the pain in the rear-end of updating my profile I will be updating here.

I'm currently in North Dakota for the foreseeable future. 

My future goal is to buy a large acreage and learn how to ranch through permaculture as well as homesteading. 

Due to recently moving I am unable relocate at this time.

I am struggling with something that is really confusing.

I want a loving Commited relationship were both parties trust, respect and treat each other with care and dignity.

At the same time I want to be tied up and used to satisfy his needs. with no rights or choice of my own. Just a thing for him to use as he desires.

How can these two co-exist?

I meet someone who wants to use me but they don't respect me or care about me outside of wanting to use me as a sex toy.

Or I will meet someone who is sweet and respects me, but doesn't want to own or treat me like an .

Its like I cant have one with out the other and its driving me coocoo for cocoa puffs.

There is like a razor fine line that I dont know how to balance on.

How can I bring these to sides of me into harmony?

What sets me apart.

For the most part I thing I am pretty average.

I think I want what most other women want. I admit I can be a bit one the fringe of what society deems acceptable. But I dont think I'm to far into the realm of weird. That's not to say there aren't times when people wonder if I dont have more then a few screws loose.

While I am similar to alot of people in both the vanilla world and the kink world I dont know if there are many if any that are like me.

First of all, I am a Christian. But I also seek a Master slave relationship. Preferably with another Christian.

I am a ultra conservative. But I dont hate liberals. There are a few that are pretty cringe worthy but that same could be said for some conservatives. Or anyone who thinks forcing their ideas or beliefs down someone else's throat. I believe this country needs both side of the coin to flourish.

I have not gotten the Covid-19 vaccine, and do ever plan on getting it.. I also don't wear masks unless their sensory deprivation hoods. I love those.

I want to be a stay at home wife. I do still want to work, I enjoy a comfortable lifestyle after all, but would prefer to work from home.

I would like to be a slave wife. But not the kind that grovels on the floor and is treated like a sidewalk. One who chooses daily to submit.

I seek a master but at the same time, a caring partner and loving husband.

I am a virgin. I want to give all of myself to the man who becomes my husband/master.

I like natural organic foods. but I'll never buy organic when I can grow or raise it myself.

I am independent but wish I had someone to depend on