After reading some journals, I have abandoned the idea of putting a weighted blanket in a duvet cover, even if it does hide the colour, which always seems to be "mental illness grey" I think they call it 

I think I might just put my cats in the duvet cover, that'll cheer me up

Well almost a week now since my last entry, not that anyone is concerned 

I've been off work since the 15th, and will be until the 8th of August, all this time off and I can't even go on holiday, thanks to petrol prices and Brexit ruining everything.

So here I sit, with my kinky thoughts, seeking some kind of stimulation and escape.

I hope everyone is having a nice time.

Warm weather always makes me really horny and submissive.  The same when I'm not feeling well, maybe something to do with being more vulnerable?  Makes me just want to be used.

So because of my journal entries and weirdly my tattoos. I've been contacted by a few very lovely people actually most from the US and I just like to say that that was really nice of you. It's been a pleasure chatting with you no matter how brief. It's nice to know that there are genuine lovely people still out there. I wish you all fun and exciting times and that you all find something that you really want.

You know who you are x

Feels like the UK representation on here is static, not even sure it's worth the effort of logging in sometimes, it's sad really, years ago this place used to be so much more active.

I've always found, I don't know if anyone else has, that I always seem to be 100's if not 1000's of miles from people that seem to be a good fit?

I think this about sums it up? https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kq5Zve11-g4

So this is a recurring fantasy I have, I hope some of you enjoy it :)

Miss wants me to be a slut, she asks me all the time, “what are you”, “a slut” I have to reply, then she punishes me for being such a submissive slut.

Then she organises for me to go and serve others. I have no choice, and I have no idea who it is until I go to their place.

There I must act as if the commands were coming from Miss, I must do as I am told.  Miss says I am not allowed to cum, if I do I will be punished for it, the people I am sent to know this, but, as they are controlling me, they can make me cum for them.

This will result in them being able to watch the punishment from Miss, so they get to decide if they want that to happen to me.

When I am finished I have to return to Miss, I kneel naked in front of her, and I have to explain everything I did in great detail, humiliating myself, I have to describe what I did, how I felt, what it smelled like, absolutely all details.

Miss then punishes me for being such a slut.

Then at the end she asks if I had cum, now the other people don’t tell her, I have to admit to it myself.

I have to say that these journals are a far better introduction than a message!

So I went out last night for a "few" drinks with friends, and I was staying at a friends house, and there was that few seconds this morning were I woke and was like 'where am I, who's bed is this, what have I done' then remembered it was the spare room at my friends house, panic over!

Did you know the ducks in the park are free, you can just fucking take them

Is it just me or is the UK demographic quite sparse on here?

Anyone going to Doni Xtra on Friday 8th July?  Message me if you are if you want,  I don't think I know anyone that's going.

So about 13 years ago, I was in club pedestal in London, it was nearing the end of the night, is been my usual shy self and not spoken to anyone.

So then I saw this amazing looking woman, dressed in a green dress, with some beautiful flowers painted on one face cheek. 

So what did I do? 

That's right, I stood up, walked right across the dance floor and introduced myself to her. 

Not long after we were meeting regularly and we embarked on a year long experiment in Domme, slave dynamic. We both learned many things.

Eventually it ended, we became the best of friends and still are today. She's now a professional Domme and is damn good at it too!

Why am I telling you this? Well there are new people out there, who don't know what to say to a dominant or how to act, it's easy, they're people just like you, tray them like a person, be yourself, unless you're a cunt! 

Most submissives and dominants just want to be talked to like humans.

BTW I'm on fetlife if anyone wants to make friends? Same user name.

Checks my inbox, weird, still no messages, hmmm maybe it's broken?

Anyway, how is everyone today? 

There's a kink event on the 8th in Doncaster, is anyone going?

So, many years ago I met someone on here, who absolutely blew my mind. 

I'd never experienced control before and it was an amazing journey.

From the very beginning, the controlling of my time, as in what I did with my free time, updates of where I would be at certain times in the day so they always knew where I was.

Having to be available at specific times. Not a minute before or a minute after.

Controlling how and when I touched myself if I could have an orgasm.

Even my clothing having to replace my underwear with women's underwear. Sitting to go to the toilet. All these things which I was told was leading up to a very hard limit of feminizing.

Which was a total mind fuck. Because with each step that I was pushed and you eventually that that limit would be pushed as well and if both scared and excited me at the same time.  Now I never knew as we never got to it if that would have happened, whether I would have been feminized or whether because it was a very hard limit of mine, it was simply used as a mind fuck.

Either way it's certainly did the trick.

The less freedom I had and the more control she took made me feel so submissive and so desperate to continue to please.

So, here I am back on here in the hope that maybe there's still something here.  Not holding my breath.

If you like the sound of me, then please do just message me, hell, I'm a sub, I get excited after I view my profile when I see that someone viewed my profile :D