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Male Submissive, 38, demorest, Georgia
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Male Switch, 21, Harpers Ferry, West Virginia
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Female Switch, 34, OC, California
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About Yourvisions
p.s. i don't think this is the average profile - but a plea or maybe just more boo hoo'ing stuff 
It sucks major time - So it isn't like riding a bike...once off you can't get back on - One thing i have learned in life is NEVER and i mean NEVER stop doing it. Doing what?, anything a person does. NEVER stop doing any of it because the saddle isn't there to get back on again. i have learned you should not let life do you in. It gets hard and you should say screw it and keep having sex. The worst thing a human can do to thine own self is deny ourselves of sexual pleasures. Life seems to reach that point of total consumption and you put everything on hold to cope with the present and then you realize you need it, you need to have your brains f'ed out and you can't do it. Your body fails your mind and you realize the problems will always be there but the stamina you had won't be and building it back up is not that easy. Stress not only sucks it takes away the best, free things of life. A sub needs to serve and how does she - ME - get it all back together again? i never had to deal with this before because the sexual high always outdid the life lows, so i think i'm up that creek without your paddle :( |
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i can't believe i'm back in this sleepless night saddle again. What is even harder to believe is no one is up but me. Misery needs company so its said and yet misery is always alone. So i'll sit here watching all those competitive commercials and get into deeper stress modes trying to figure out which triple to buy. Yet, who can afford even the single one. All those fees and taxes make it shocking because it ends up being more than what shows in bold numbers. Then i wonder will these commericals be around forever because what is the determining factor for when they don't have to air them anymore. i hope that they lessen the load and only show them once a day instead of once every 2nd or 3rd commercial. So which one do i choose? Maybe i need to get a daisy and pick the petals until the last petal gives me the answer. |
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SEX AND THOSE STUPID PHASES - well mine anyway - Can't recall from birth but stating it this way anyway - From birth to preteen there are those constant picking ups and bouncy bouncy on the laps of anyone who picked me up, and endless hugs with those cutsie kisses on my cheeks, and once i learned the pucker up technique there were all those super second kiss on lippers that everyone smiled over. Now that teen cusp happens and suddenly it is all wrong to do - actually considered a sin to expect someone to pick me up and bounce me on their laps or for me to do that pucker up thing and go around planting those second kisses on lips. Actually, it would be a "scarlet letter" act if any of that is done. Now what constitutes it being okay from birth to preteen years and then suddenly NOT a thing that is acceptable in any way shape or form? i think i know - It is when my tits popped out a mile longer than the rest of my body. i remember suddenly no one looked at me not in my face or tits. i was a nothing suddenly, no a kid, not a person, not a girl but just a moving object that appeared bigger in areas when looked into from a front view mirror. Talk about a mental f'ing. Well, this sample box came in the mail one summer's day and i walked in with it. i opened it and pulled out this bulky object and my mom slapped me for opening it and my dad and brothers just looked. i was actually stunned but knew not to say a word. my mom raced off with it and hid it. K, i was curious as all heck but forced myself to forget about it. Now, still wandering in the dark about why my dad didn't talk to me the way he once did, and my older brother's friends taking more of an interest in talking to me more than they once is it any wonder why i turned out like i did? LOL i knew things changed almost overnight in the way relationships were with people i knew and why i could not understand. Then another mystery 'folds' itself out of the RED. A super nice sunny day, i'm in these super bright, pink shorts at our annual BBQ in the 60's. All the women in those long, cotton dresses with their hair done up like they are going to a wedding, and all the men in white, crisp shirts with dressy slacks, kids runny all over the place, and tons of stuff on the grill, and suddenly as if the needle scratches across the hi-fi system playing the vinyls everything went into slow mo then into a complete halt. All the adults stopped talking as i walked across the lawn with my hamburger in hand, and the woman start racing towards me, but the kids are still doing their things. my mom grabs me so hard and fast i dropped my plate and the woman form a circle around me as if they were a band of wagons protecting me from being attacked from Native Americans during a wagon trail mobility adventure. Then my mom tells me hurry up get inside and the woman in uniform to my steps step with me until we were all in the house. They all just looked at me with dead eyeballs. No reaction except for gasps. My mom drags me into the bathroom and pulls off my shorts and i spot this huge red oval in the center of them and all around the backside. i thought oh well, i'll just change into my pants, of course they were white LOL and my mother's face went fire engine red. She yelled at me that i could not wear them and to get a dark pair, and she hands me that sample box that she hid from me that day. Well, yeah, like what the hell is this and why the hell does she give it to me now? So out comes this bulky white thing, and a belt. Holy crap you want me to put that where? That had to be the first, worst day of my life. i thought the stain thing was just a one time deal. Now comes the birds and the bees chat. This from a woman who never disclosed any of this stuff until that moment. It would have been nice to be on the lookout for this thing instead of know nothing of it. Well talk about my second mind f'ing this was it. Having all the men at the bbq and the woman witness this event of my first day of womanhood hahahahaha, in my red spotted bright pink shorts. Actually, no this is the third the second was when i had to get a bra which was a slighty lighter material than a knight's armor. Those things were horrible in those days. Back to the third...So i stick that thing on me with that horrible belt with the metal clasp that actually twisted when i sat and stapped me right in my ass crack which may have been the result as to why so many women alwasy squirmmed their butts in those days when they sat, especially on Sunday in those church pews LOL. i know my butt squirmmed a lot once a month. Well i walk out to the bbq in dark slacks with a buldge between my legs because those things were huge in those times, bulky, and inconvenient as all heck since they did not have wings to adhere to a panty, and my legs wide apart like a kid in diapers, and it is a wonder how not every woman from my generation didn't end up bow legged. K, moving along into the teen thing when every male just wanted it. It being i don't even think they knew, just that it had to be it. A touch of a tit, a peck on the lips, a woman's touch to their cock above or in the zippered area. Just any it would do. i of course didn't do it, none of it. i was given strict instructions not to do it. Amazing when i think of it LOL, not being told what an it was but just not to do it and i knew. Instinct is a bitch. i knew kissing was wrong because of it being wrong since that preteen thing and i knew anything down there was wrong since the RED warning light appeared, and i knew anything a man owned was dirty hahahahahahaha. Why, all those sublim messages that is why from family and friends. Talk about the mind f'ing at its best. So i didn't date, what the heck was the sense. That it thing was too confusing to me and way too stressful to mentally cope with since it could not be pinpointed but existed. i figured just like that red thing appeared one day the it thing would and i'd know what the heck it was. There was no sense wasting my time on it so i ventured into other things that a girl teen does when she doesn't have male friends. i closed myself out of the picture. i didn't talk to guys, i didn't look at them, and i didn't date them. i figured this is how to make a safe zone until it just was meant to be. Having girl buds was too stressful also because they could not stop talking about the it. In those times everyone talked out of their blowholes because it was a few things they heard or may have seen and then they made up all this other stuff and it made no sense to me at all. If the Virgin Mary could have a baby without having sex well need i go on. So i closed girls out also. i became a loner and talk about the ultimate mind f'ing technique hahahahahahahaha. i figured just f it. So i sat in my "lonely room" as that story goes...and i wrote stuff, tons of stuff. i listened to a popular radio station on my handheld tranistor radio, and i got my sex education from songs. They were not detailed but some of them gave me some good clues. It became all about breezes in hair, hot fun, wondering whys, needing one now and forever, things like this, but they were all clues that made these perfect pictures. So i knew i could find it as long as i kept my hair long and walked around on breezy days! Another mind f'ed episode. Why was everything kept under wraps who knows but boy between religion, society, and songs...no wonder huh. Pushing the fast forward here i am in my 50's and no damn better at this it thing than i was in my teens. I recall the male teen and all he wanted was it. There was no consideration to the female counterpart. Just super warm and tender while he wanted it done to him. Cold as ice before and after the attempts but during the exploration of possibly getting it, soft and warm. Then the mid aged males, super more attentive as they knew what it was all about. Want it, gotta give the female a lot of attention and like magic she zones in on it like a bee to pollen. Just somehow knows it wihout knowing it and all she needs is guidance on the how to's from her male and all is well before, during, and after. The later years are just like the early years. It what the f is it and where the hell is it. The older males aren't interested in warm and tender stuff. They just want it. They want to prove to the world they still have it. There are no taking time to warm into it. They park a car on a darkened road, unzip the pants and pop goes the weasel so to speak and they expect the woman to just it the it. Does life end as it began in this aspect. Does a male go full circle while the woman just goes back to ewwwwwwwwwwww not this crap again. A younger male just wants it fast and the older male does also? There is no experience to the younger male but the older male has tons of knowing so why the speed thing. Is it a health issue that they are on a time limit, they can only feel things for a certain amount of time and then poof? i don't enjoy a parked car unless it is in a garage, a corvette, and all hell can break loose because there is no fear of being seen, heard, or arrested for indecent anything. i can't do the park bench thing either. Too many germs on a park bench. People's dogs with their dog butts on it, animals wandering about and jumping on it, insects that lurk in the cracks of wood can crawl into the cracks of humans. Sneeking into a home while the wifey is at work or getting her hair done and the male handing an escape map incase she pops home early, well that isn't what i do either. So dealing with the older male isn't mentally right either. Phases are phases though. Time creates patterns and there is nothing a person can do to change them. You can take a different road but all roads lead to mind f's. The truth sounds like a downer but it isn't, it is just reality. Sometimes i pretend and think to myself it isn't real so just go for it for fun, but it is real and if woman had cocks mine would never be up. Situations have a lot to do with "IT" and no matter how you play the game it always comes down to it. i know the best it moments were when i was in my twentys. That is when a male seems to do so much for the woman. Woman in their twenties have the balls in their court so to speak but looking back a woman in their twenties just don't have a clue. It is then that they can rule the world because they can have anything they want if only they know how to do "IT". The older woman have all they want because they learned from their mistakes but they don't get it the same way a twenty year olc would. A male is so willing to give to a woman then, and not so willing later but the elder woman knows how to get exactly what she wants and it isn't in a nice way hahahahahahahaha from what i hear and have heard. i'm one of the older ones but it was never about getting so i didn't learn how to toy with men and personally who the heck wants to waste time dealing with all that bull, just to have security, hair styles, nails done, fancy clothes, etc. So, i'm one of the older ones that just took each phase as it happened, didn't try to change any of it, and here i sit in my "lonely room". Phase like life is what you make it, and it always ends in "It". |
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i'll show You Yours if You show me mine.... Sometimes things just look better in print. |
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