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| But why are we taught to feel reflexive shame whenever the subject comes up? Why will the Structure allow every other kind of sexual behavior but *that* one? Because submission and dominance are resources it needs for its very survival. They cannot be wasted in private sex. In *any* kind of sex. It needs our submission so that it may retain power. It needs our lusts after dominance so that it can co-opt us into its own power game. There is no joy in it, only power. I tell you, if S and M could be established universally, at the family level, the State would wither away.
I may perhaps employ metaphors in describing the contractual rituals as a symbolic way of asserting my own power over those who, paradoxically, autonomously agree to submit. With little other fanfare, we will proceed into the other room, to the bed. I am very excited. My Manner has now changed, somewhat, to a more commanding, authoritative demeanor.
What is being communicated now is a certain authoritative command based solely on contractual experience as I inform the subject that I am going to instruct her. I radiate an expertise that may, I admit, to someone of a particular psychological makeup, appear menacing. All but the most hardened subjects begin asking me what it is I want them to do. I, on the other hand, very deliberately exclude the word want and its analogues from my instructions. I am not about expressing wishes or asking of pleading or persuading here, I inform them. That is not what this is about.
I always phrase it as This is what you are to do, You are to do such-and-such and so on and so forth. I tell them how to stand and when to turn and how to look at me. Articles of clothing are to be removed in a certain very particular order.
The order is less important than that there is an order, and that they comply.
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