xJadeButterflyx

Are you who you say you are because it in your nature or is it because of your environment shaped you.

Struggling to identify your own self in the lifestyle is common. I have met some who have taken this lifestyle to mean a divine incarnation of natural order. Where others prove it only to be secular.

I do not believe many realize that they use this lifestyle as therapy until they are so deeply involved that they become victims of their own doing. To own "your" choices is also never easy. when "you" start off with a assumption that the person who you managed to have a 10 minutes conversation or three month online relationship should be all they portray then only to realize they too are finding there way. I have no bias as to this being dom or sub related. Both can be victims.

Limits list are like fine toilet papers, in the end they are full of shit if you're first starting out. Everything you believe in will have a reality check mark over and over again because it is the effectiveness of your partners in that instance that will determine the value of your desire and your willingness to go forward.

Have you taken the time assessed why you are here, what you need and why you need it? Are your needs truly understood by your partner. Do you understand theirs needs?

I been asked why I have not listed anything in my profile. So I thought it would be best to addess that question in my journal for all to read, but first let  me get out my region. I live in So. California in the high desert area apprx. 2.5 hr from Nevada stateline. It's a small town and rural.

So, regarding my non bdsm profile. I feel if you want to know me then know all of me start with the basic first. I value friends more than strangers. I've been in the lifestyle for 10 years off and on. I could rattle off all i have done, but I am not going to make this i am better or worse at this than you are. We all learn at our own speed,  and sometime clearity and wisdom do not always meet at the same time. I have made mistake and I am sure many have when they first started.

The only thing I wish to state is that I will not entertain a gorean household or strict sm.It's not my thing. Ask me a question in email and I will answer it as soon as I can..

sincerely,

~J~

So you're online checking out all your future submissive or switch. You thumb through all the usual question in your mind that will spark a playful banter.

Here's my advice to a dominant

Dominant: how old
Dominant:  can you obey
Dominant: ok dont talk
Me: seriously do you assume I am going to submit to these questions
Dominant:  up to u
Me: Get to know a person first or you'll never be able to dominant them, you'll just top
Dominant: maybe your right
Me: I know I am right.. you keep going the way you are you'll have more  and you'll meet more pyschos that need meds.  You already know there a potential for bdsm, now get to know them and see if you'll need a restraining order later
Dominant: ok lol