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There is nothing worse then having a need and not feeding it..:( |
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It might seem we don't live the lifestyle. The truth is we don't through this site. I and she use this site to occasionally update journals and keep in touch with long term friends not on other sites.
Todays journal...So proud of my piggy whore slut. Just when I think her well of slut is drying up. I take her to an event and her slut comes out to please me..I see a nice looking guy, respectful, clean looking, mature and I go to speak with him...My judgement is sound...would you like to have your cock sucked by my slut I enquire..
He replies somewhat a little eager..hmmm yes..I instruct her to come with me and him and I lead them both to a side room.
On all fours slut please..she is naked..( we are at a sauna spa ) she complies instantly...suck cock slut and she does ( yes Sir ) without a second asking...hands on the bed..head held by the guy..most of his his cock disappears into her mouth..no choking, straight in...I instruct him..no asking her how she is enjoying it..she is not there to be asked..she is there to be instructed...after a while I suggest he fucks her..turn over slut, face down..and he mounts her deep and hard...she wants to cum but must ask..she does this by stating her status, she is a slut..she repeats..I am a slut, I am a slut..I reply..well done slut.and whose slut are you..your slut Sir..I grin with pride....you may cum and she does.
An excellent night, a night of affirmation and l am honoured to have her in my life...3 and a half years now.. |
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Attended the LFW on Friday 13th....excellent time from my perspective, alot of newbi's there but that's good some made an effort to wear gear, not sure why one chose to wear a pandas outfit and another a pilots uniform but hey...
Lots of people played, some in dark corners...tweeked my kink button. Did aome edge play on her with candle wax, drew a crowd then gave my last part of my used candle to a delighted domme who proceeded to set fire to her males sub hairy back...weg
she is correct elf n safety said we had to stand out in the rain until 10 past the opening time of 10pm but hey..I was a bouncer once...on the whole an excellent time until 3pm, met up with new and old friends...2 days to recover
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spend most of my time on fetbook now, come have a looksey at my othe nick dark desires |
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Not long now and canada awaits my arrival |
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Whilst I recognise that fantasy plays a major part in the minds of us all, I see fantasy as an unrealised needs.
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Time to fly again 16 whole days of glorious sunshine, decided to treat slave, she has spent all her gold stars to go see new born grand daughter..grinzzzz she is so excited and that pleases me.
LOL..just how much clothing does a woman need to take..lol..me I'm travelling light..
flogger, passport, wallet, a holdall of clothing and shark repellant lol.. |
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Just got back from Egypt with slave. Fantastic time.. |
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You are the best sub I have ever owned....making changes is always difficult....all l do is push you out of your comfort zone....there is so much more in you that can be released..xxx |
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My will is to have cake and eat it......l always get my way... |
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slut attended her first of many bdsm modelling assignments............smiles |
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Some personal thoughts
To some the need to know is a kind of validation, for me the need to know is knowledge. Knowledge empowers, Power enables control.
I am embraced in a paradox. A balance between the light and the dark side of human nature.
I am told people dislike me.......l am a dragon aries male...it's my karma...
curtesy, integrity, self control, perseverance, but above all an indomitable spirit...many have tried....but I cannot be broken.
only god can judge me |
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The dark side beckons me......the need to over power...to whip, to beat, to bind.....to use my slave, all of her holes non stop..........
she constantly challenges me....no slave has ever come close to what l need....she does... |
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4 whole days off wahooooooooooooooooooooooooo |
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smiles..took slave to a health spa..lots of sauna and skinny dipping...sigh she is a water nypmh for sure...love watching her swim nekid lol..had her do a freezing cold shower weg...swam together.....great day out |
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note to self.......l am a dragon, aries male...with all that the title implies.. |
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I am so proud of my slut....rain lashed, wind swept, bus, train, underground to her first nude modelling audition...when it was time to strip and pose the other female fled...but she kept going..dam l wish l had been there.
Growlllll....... glows with pride |
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Sexy, brat, continually topping, submissive, slave, happy, moody, funny, singing. Just when l think l should cane her ass, she flicks her ass at me in the store, hugs me and l melt.....
I love her... |
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thank you slut...for giving me your heart, your soul, your body, your mind...now go put in them in the jar next to the tea bags in the kitchen..xxxxx |
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home at last, home at last, thank god l'm home at last....quote from martini lager king. |
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Had a blast..canadians know how to live..work hard and party..friendliest people on earth..people that like bad ass music, should look up colt harley band, they deserve the break..loved the fire walk..amazed that l pulled a 200 pound biker from the flames pmsl..........it's 12.40pm canada time waiting for my car lift to airport to fly home...at last to my slut...who waited patiently for me...l thank you slut. I know it has been a difficult week for you xxxxxx
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sighs...frustration at being away from my slave...she feels pain from my not being there...l feel pain for not being there...and the rage that rises within me at the people who take advantage of her loneliness..and try to entice her mind away...2 days..and soon l shall be back..and hell follows behind me |
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looks to his slut..physically 7000 miles away...mentally no distance at all...notes your frustration....you do not like being left unattended..fear not slut..sir will soon back......sir has his whips now..6 beautiful single tails..one l have all ready named...after you piggywhore..xxxxxxxx |
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today's the day of my flight..l shall be away from you for 7 days..only physically...mentally l am always with you....
Do your tasks....and don't forget to feed ladyj...xxxxxxxxxxx |
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Happy days...fate bestows upon me 2 gifts.
A free cane...with every purchase, curtesy of a garden centre.
And a permanent collar made of steel, that my slave apiggywhore lovingly painted red and now wears locked and bolted around her neck...l am truely a happy and proud man.... |
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Off to get my shiny new toy,....then pack for my international flight Monday..One week without my slave, my slut...not very dom l know, but l shall miss you.....
Your laughter, your scent, your mind, your body, your cry's, your singing..( yes you may go to karaoke)
Note...to slave..although l do not encourage the pleasure of others who follow and read your profile blog
You may put up a profile picture.. |
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just when l get home from work to touch upon an issue that requires affirmative action of harsh discipline, she stands there dressed in her body halter, 7 inch heels with that pose that drives me wild and says..l am your hair dresser..would sir like a head shave....
I melt..smiles...though not completely weg..after all l am a sadist...This man is so happy... |
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Carpe Diem...!!! the slave arrives at my house. 6pm today, she arrives topping as she walks through the door..help me with bags, don't even think of touching me until l have bathed she says, not even a Sir..Smiles...l stand bemused...listening to her tales of traffic jams, excited, bags, hair pieces..telling ME to put a brew on...brew ( thats tea for those that live in North America )
dear reader...brb..l must forthwith place an order for 20 canes, because somehow l feel they are going to be needed...l smile again... |
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At my home at last from buying his shiney new toy.....from the jewellers, to find that his slut up north has been hard at work...editing...excellent...hmmmm copy pasting l expect..
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it is 4am in the morning ugh..getting ready for work....but l smile like an eeeejit... |
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since when has Christian Ronaldo the famous Portuguese footballer been slaveanton living in india been on CM..
Fakebegone..selling at 99c a bottle |
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I enjoy reading your short and to the point fantasies slut..you do not need to be elequent for me...just be the slut you are..do not change..l want no airs and graces from you slut...just your sluthood, your obedience..
even your brat bossiness topping...l know you do this to entice me to cane you...which is welcomed but sighsss.... how many times must l remind you...
If l want to cane you...l will at my own leisure and pleasing..smiles..
Sir loves you
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whats with the disrespect. I seem to spend my time chasing away predatory males from my slave. |
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For some reason l feel the urge to go to garden centre and look at planters, flowers..for my slave..hmmmmm wonders if l can get a large shed in garden..turn it in to a dungeon, have her hanging up on a hook while all bound and gagged..lustful thoughts...Adammmmmmmmmm...think gardening....Ommmm gardening Ommmmm |
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time for meditation...l love this prayer
Oh Great Spirit, whose voice I hear in the winds and whose breath gives life to everyone, Hear me.
I come to you as one of your many children; I am weak... I am small...I need your wisdom and your strength. Let me walk in beauty, and make my eyes ever behold the red and purple sunsets.
Make my hands respect the things you have made and make my ears sharp so I may hear your voice. Make me wise, so that I may understand what you have taught my people and the lessons you have hidden in each leaf and each rock.
I ask for wisdom and strength, not to be superior to my brothers, but to be able to fight my greatest enemy, myself.
Make me ever ready to come before you with clean hands and a straight eye, so as life fades away as a fading sunset, my spirit may come to you without shame. |
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smiles at the memory of his slaves demonstration of submission...by kneeling in front of me in public....thank you slut..l cherish you..xxxx |
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The dragon fly's Sunday....ma wah ha ha ha..must remember my stingy thing..just in case she has been bad..hmmmm checks note book....dam it's blank xxxx hmmmm just have to make something up then won't l evil laugh |
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Time for sit up's, press up's and power walking...dragon man likes to keep in shape for his slut...smiles... |
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Does his dragon dance around the kitchen...happy days....the bank has found my money..after 3 months...wahoooo |
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Back to work grrrr oh well another day another dollar.....looks round his cave, now her home and notices it has grown smaller lol...her things hang in the * monstrosity*...........she has gone for awhile and l miss her... |
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I am ...so proud of my slave, she works all day, then drives to me through the night..dressed only in a coat....police sirens, roads closed...eventually arrives 2am |
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hmmmmm l'm sure l got this round the wrong way..lmao..Sir is vacuuming, tidying his cave etc..while awaiting his slave to drive down to him tonight...looks at the manual of slave ownership again...maybe it's a misprint lol |
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You bestow me the greatest gift l have ever had...it makes me feel so proud...thank you..my heart beats just that little bit faster, my smile just that little bit brighter...
The flight journey with a dragon male is never easy, but l make you this promise...l am devoted to you xx..you have my heart xx
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Re reads his hypnotheraphy notes...time to refresh my training methinks...must seek out my trainer.. |
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A sleepless night.....misses his slut...not just physically...slaves makes kings of us all.
Recognises the rising dragon fire within him.....switches his mind off...enters his special place, communes with the great spirit and is at peace...blessed be.. |
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notes her fiestiness when tired..lol...l do not chunner...cough..l may go off on a tangent sometimes..but....and points the finger at her for effect....l never chunner lol..licks his crop..and thanks the slut for the correct spelling |
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I am so blessed and honoured that she chooses me to liberate the slut within her...awaits the day she will join me here in my cave...l wanted you the first day l saw you, nothing has changed... |
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there are days l hate being a dragon/aries male...patience is not in my gene pool lol...hmmmm tries the phrana to help slow himself down.. |
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Smiles to his sweet slut...whatever hesitation there was, has gone...come to me..the monstrosity awaits you lol...and l do to..
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Stone cold sober....it's 5.30am..gotta get up go to work arggggg..and the offer is still there.. |
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Small steps, their shall be teething problems as we grow together sweet slut of mine.
Message to other dom's..your suggestions to her about her possible unhappiness are just hidden suggestions that somehow she would be happier with you. Respect her profile she is taken. |
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What is this gift l have for making subs cry, ....some men seem to be able to lift inspire, lift their subs,...this man seems only able to touch emotional nerves...l am in a low place... |
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smiles..and looks at you...you are not useless. There are no such things as mistakes only small steps to learn to grow together...
You are such a strong minded person, you have had to be..this l recognise and accept...leaning on someone else is difficult for you, again l understand...but with each day..we become closer, trust in my judgement grows...one day you will give your self to me totally and kneel before without question..l hold you..kiss you..look me in the eye.....l am always with you xxxx
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I sat and watched you breathing, sleeping, wrapped in a duvet in my bed, a smile upon your lips.....I say to you....many have ridden on this dragons tail.....it's a journey not made easy, you have the opportunity to run...but if you stay, l shall cherish you like no other... |
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The door opens to my comfort zone, my cave...l am off to visit She who awoke me...
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Soon to be appearing in glorious technocolor and panivision...
A classic remake of...The return of the goatee..or The goatee strikes back or that latest film with Mr Clooney...the man that stared at goatee...lmao |
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Work, work, work, work...they say only fools and horses work...hmmmm well l'm not a fool...so...hmmmmm cart horse or stallion..
Grinzzzz..can l be Red Rum winner of The Grand National..lol... |
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Thank you to all those that send their written kindness..smiles..
And to she who talked some sense into me, my special thanks xx |
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Have been reminded that it's only 3 months since her death...feelings of guilt...I question myself what right have l to be happy...while all her hopes, her dreams lie in ashes..some will say suck it up, move on. I tried...l apologise to any who have shown an interest in this man. |
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I miss the smell of musk on a pillow, the warmth of a female's body next to mine. Even the hair in the plughole, The meals gone wrong, the fight for the remote, the glare of the eye from a misunderstood stance. The laughter over a silly joke.
The making up's, the smile as l came through the door...the reminders to put whites seperately in the wash. The tights in the freezer. The purchase of extra toilet rolls, tisssues, that only a woman can need..the hugs l gave to still a sobbing cry...the list is endless and so is this nightmare. |
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l honour my late wife, my lover MzLizaHEAT, you were my life, the ground that supported me, the air that gave me life and the wind that let me fly. 15th Aug 1960-20th March 2010.......
I am now defaulting to single male..learning to live again..l am not alone..not with 3 billion other souls in this world...we are but one family, all connected...l send out my prayers to the great spirits to bring me peace and healing energies.. |
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lmao..l am such a doofus..lost my keys, wallet, specs argggggg..stomps round kitchen, bites table lol....must be here some where..it's at these times dear reader one needs someone else to remind you where they are...okay this calls for the power of self hypnosis....to regress back a stage at a time and bingoooooo they are on the fridge... |
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Strange thought patterns at the moment...one's like..how l have changed or did l bury myself in order to create a balance with a domme wife..lol....
When l got married it became difficult, well we both had to learn to bond, Me Dom and her Domme..it was power control from both..so something had to give..l needed her to be more submissive..lol...not easy for her.. .I changed to a stance of validation l thought by seeking validation l was gaining. Alas l think in the end l started to think l didn't please her, lost my confidence and we became vanilla by default...l loved her so much..how could any man have resisted this woman..l couldn't..sigh...now some parts of old Adam past return..this leads to guilt feelings..not making much sense |
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smiles to those that write with such kind words...we have never met, but be assured l take them to heart. Am getting there, still some how expecting her to walk through that door. I slowly realise she won't be..
Work keeps my mind occupied...where do l go from here..time will tell l guess.
Once again..astral hugs to those that came and wrote kind words... |
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One of the great unwritten rules of life and one that l have observered all my life...the mystery, the sanctity and privacy of a woman's hand bag......stares at her handbag....at some point l have to decide what to do...her scent is everywhere, her clothes, her, her perfume still untouched.. |
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Time to start detox..lots of water...there are still no answers at the bottom of the well.. |
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Todays the hardest day of my life...her funeral..I am sending her to the great spirit Princess style. Black glass coach drawn by 2 beautiful black horses. As her man l walked with her...l guess l wanted to hold her hand one last time.....Honour and respect paid to her and her ancestors through Native spirit music, poem and with an Ojipwa/Chipperwa Prayer.
I am standing on the edge of abyss. |
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Thank you to those that wrote to me in my darkest hour..there are no answers in the bottom of the pit. I have looked.
Today the healing process starts and have decided to send my baby off in princess style. We are talking horse and carriage, we are talking causing major traffic tail backs. I kind of think she would have approved. We have chinese lanterns to fly skywards. We are talking Ojipwa Indian music, poems to celebrate her ancestors. Then my celtic blood will call for music and guiness. She disliked alcohol but l will deal with that when next l see her. |
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I give you this one thought to keep - I am with you still - I do not sleep. I am a thousand winds that blow, I am the diamond glints on snow, I am the sunlight on ripened grain, I am the gentle autumn rain.
When you awaken in the morning's hush, I am the sweet uplifting rush, of quiet birds in circled flight. I am the soft starts that shine at night. I am with you still in each new dawn........
Do not think of me as gone - I won't and l shall love you forever
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You find me at the most difficult time of my life. On Saturday 20th at 3.10am my partner of just 2 and 1/2 years, died in my arms of cancer. I am unable to breathe and the light has gone from my life...
I want to rage at the unfairness...l would lay waste the world for just 2 more minutes with my one....forgive me l could not save you.. |
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It always amazes me when l am in chat room some peoples perception of the words alternative life style...some people have no problem talking about, beating, tieing, domming, submitting, the whole 9 yards about our/their life style....but mention the word colonic irrigation..a hydro theraphy to cleanse..and they shout....to much information Adam lol..alternative also includes alternative medicine |
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Due to my partners ill health we have decided to sell off our last piece of equipment..a beautifully made black 7 ft tall cast iron flogging/whipping post, cunningly disguised as a hat/coat stand so that vanilla people who visit are non the wiser lol. Interested parties wishing to purchase please feel free to inquire |
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