Tahna

*laughing* is listing your age preference between 18 and 50 really a preference?

i no longer believe

Anyone have a clue why 8 of the last 10 people who've viewed my profile are submissive men? I read AlterEgo's latest entry and all i can say is, "i feel ya' " and wish you the best... personally, i've found waiting for something that may occur in the future to be an exercise in futility. Why do people do that? As a Buddhist my constant practice is endeavoring to live fully engaged in this present moment. It can be incredibly frustrating dealing with people who live mentally in the past or in the future. There's a difference between learning from the past, or being hopeful about the future... seriously, ask yourself,? what do we have other than this very present moment? How often do you find yourself thinking or ruminating about the past or the future? Fully engaged, consciously connected, right here, right now, that's all we've really got.

It's about time for the annual check-in... and I've missed some friend's writing : )

I started to edit my profile and actually answer the BDSM questions and changed my mind. As a masochist I've learned that it is insane to give a sadist any ammunition. If I say I hate it, the probability that I will experience it increases substantially! If I say I love it, chances are good it'll be used as motivation. *lauging* So... I'm not answering them for now.

Thank you to those who let me know my profile needed updating. I haven't been on the site in quite a while; as my September journal entry indicated I have been taking care of business. Changes in my professional life created an opportunity for me to relocate from Florida to California in January of this year. While the majority of my time and attention are currently devoted to settling into my new position *no pun intended* I am eager to discover the wonders of the Bay Area. In particular, sailing, all things wine, great food and the beauty of the local parks and recreation areas. [end of the moonlight and long walks part of the entry] I remain open to opportunities to cultivate loving power exchange relationships while not "looking for" them or trying to fit square pegs in round holes. I will spare you the "I am a strong submissive" speech because frankly, I'm not. In the absence of dynamic I do what I have to do because that is what responsible adults do. I choose power exchange because I prefer the company of decisive, take charge personalities when it comes to my interpersonal/sexual relationships. At bottom, it's about compatibility and complementing one another's lives. Laughter, ease, peace of mind and a witness are what I seek. A life of contented interdependence, where, when we are free to just be who and what we are, we add to and improve the qualities of all our lives. I am absolutely bi-sexual and poly; not because it is what anyone else wants me to be but because I genuinely believe that more hands make lighter work, that less work for everyone means more leisure and an improved quality of life but mostly I believe that love begets more love... oh, and sex with both genders meets different aspect of my personality, desires, longings and needs. I believe that it is possible to be a polyamorous person and be ethical, faithful and devoted. Poly does not equal indiscriminate. Not so bad for off the cuff, I'll leave it be for now.

One of my firmest convictions is that in order to exhange power, you must possess power. You do a great disservice to others by not having your own house in order. You hear this so often from the bottom side regarding toppy types but it holds equally true for bottoms. I've recently had a couple of interesting contacts and would like to pursue them but life events require that I focus on me right now. I don't use sex or bdsm as a distraction from the matters at hand. As a member of any relationship or family I think having the ability to buckle down and focus during change is imperative. If you do not perceive the ability to delay gratification as strength of character then we would not be a good match anyway.   One quality that I am attracted to most in dominant types is that ability to delay gratification, to prioritize... oftentimes it manifests in me being told to go "sit over there and wait" or "shut the fuck up, I am busy"... I like it like that and find it pretty hot.

As a courtesy, because manners are important to me, please do not email me if your profile states that everything you live for and love is strictly BDSM related. I do not live for BDSM and I love many things that have nothing to do with BDSM; primarily, truth, authentic connection, engaged living, laughter, and beauty in it's manifold forms.  I have a purposefully sparse profile: I don't hold internet communication in the highest of regard. I do and will contact or respond to those who spark my interest. I am an experienced submissive who thrives in the power exchange relationship. It is the model that permits the fullest expression of the various aspects of my personality and sexuality. Most importantly, obedience, service, predicament, tears and groveling can be fun and if we aren't having fun why bother?

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