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The Largest BDSM Community on the Planet

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Pan Female Submissive, 39,  BC, Canada
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succubusmachine - photo 1
succubusmachine - photo 3
succubusmachine - photo 4

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*The year has not been kind to me. I live with chronic pain so my interest and activity levels are variable and I have no patience for bullshit. I am seeking LOCAL partners, but slowly. Would like to find dominant or switch partners, of negotiable level of serious or casual for ongoing good times. I am polyamorous and do have an anchor (male) partner. See below*

insatiably lusty sub. Experienced enough to know myself and what i like. LOW BULLSHIT TOLERANCE.

Prefer a connection of sorts, friendship. RESPECT MANDATORY.I am looking for ongoing play, so be local, and interested in meeting, not endless emails. I want to get to know you, to flirt with you, but the goal is a Real Live In Person connection. I am polyamorous, and have a stable anchor partner. I am looking to enhance and supplement, not replace.

If your profile has no pictures, and there is interest in meeting, I will ask you to send a picture. Not for collecting, not as free porn, but to see who I am talking to. Theres a fair bit of me on this profile, Id like to see some of you. NOTE that this does NOT translate to Send me a dick pic! Im not visually stimulated like that.

hard limit list

FACE SLAPPING, SELF-WORTH EFFECTING HUMILIATION, HOODS, BEASTIALITY, SCAT, and PLASTIC WRAP are all HARD LIMITS. No exceptions. Dont even ask me. Im also unlikely to respond positively to demands for online obedience. I do enjoy casual chat with friendly and interesting people.

Use your brain, I like brains in my partners. Preference is to folks local to me, but an intelligent message from anywhere is welcome.I heartily dislike txt spk or users who flood my inbox with one liners then call me names for being unresponsive. I do not appreciate the web equivalent of cat calls or Heyy Baybees.

I am looking to re-indulge my tastes for bondage, impact, play, group sex, and fisting (among other things). Bonus points if youre willing to play with or in front of my anchor partner.

For more details...ask. Show some intelligence. I like that.And for the record, I have never had anything good come of emails asking Can I ask you a question?












 Submissive Female



 5' 4"

 250 lbs






Actively Seeking:

Dominant Transgender

Dominant Female

Dominant Male

Switch Male

Male Dom Couples


 Lives For:

 Horseback Riding




 Begging (Beginner)

 Blindfolds (Expert)

 Breast Play

 Canes and Crops

 Collars (Beginner)


 Erotic touch (Beginner)

 Gags (Beginner)

 Hair Pulling


 Modern Primitivism

 Sensory Play

 Spanking (Expert)

 Suspension Bondage (Beginner)

 Vibrators (Beginner)




 Intellectual Discourse







 Rear End Play

 Fire Play (Beginner)

 Obedience Training (Beginner)

 Orgasm Control (Beginner)

 Public Play (Beginner)

 Role Playing (Beginner)

 Wax Play (Beginner)

 Board Games







 The Occult




 Local BDSM Community

 Being Massaged

 Objectification (Beginner)



 Curious About:


 Electrical Play


 Medical fetish play

 Mental Bondage


 Clothing Selection

 Outdoor Bondage

 Speech Restrictions


 Theatrical Scenes

 Lifestyle BDSM


 Housework Service

 Oral Service







 Romance Novels

 Hard Limits:



 Sensation Play

 Plastic Wrap Bondage

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Journal Entries:
1/12/2022 6:30:26 PM

Any form of reproduction based kink including lactation is a HARD LIMIT for me and extremely triggering. 

Pressing the issue is a violation of my consent and you will be reported for harrassment. 

Respecting hard boundaries is sexy. 

1/8/2022 2:57:04 AM

My favorite sex toy is someone else's filthy mind. I've always gravitated to chat for libido charged distraction. Once upon a time a million years ago, it was phone chat that really worked for me. I love to be talked to in play. But along the way, I became inhibited, not wanting to hear myself. Text based chat was like interactive written erotica. I loved the fantasy experience of new pervs and familiar ones. Rooms with a premise thrilled me, I loved working in the chatroom brothel here on collarspace. All these spaces degrade though and it is gone. This is the worst kind of nostalgia, to miss a virtual thing shared and loved solo.  I feel I must be old now and I do not know how to evolve.

11/27/2017 1:15:02 AM
Hello, Libido. I am ready for that irresistibly compatible something new now. Or two. Something real and solid and...exciting.

11/23/2017 1:18:58 AM
Frustration. Poly dating is like building sand castles below the tide line. You build something promising, finding places your needs and wants overlap. Then the waves sneak up and dash your elaborate structure to flat sand in a single motion. Gone without trace. Ghosted, slow fade, found another and wants monogamy. You're secondary, already partnered, on the cut list. Sometimes its painful, sometimes exasperating. It makes you bitter, resentful, angry, sad. So many men who seem so interested, so keen, attracted by sluttery, reveal possessive tendencies. "Oh, I love a slut. But you'll have to be exclusive to me. Aside from your primary, I suppose." What? "I love that youre a slut. But dont be a slut. Its safer if we're exclusive." Yep, it is. You know whats safest? Abstinence. Go fuck yourself. Safest there is. Some partners refuse a clean break, lingering indefinitely. Like a fool, I enertain them. Because familiarity. Because of what was. Because hope when discouraged. What a sucker. They pop up like whack a mole, full of flattery and fond memories, stirring libido. Nothings changed, theres no follow through, its the same old unsatisfying patterns. And they never reciprocate when Im the one needing flirtatious nothings. Fuckers. But I have no one to blame but myself. Like the frog says: I hope that something better comes along. Sand castle frustration. What to do with it? Put it down here in writing, of course. Here where my inbox is filled with idiocy, rudness, horror, and the occassional ornate sand castle, flattened. No one reads this shit anyways. Less chance of it being recognized in this place. I gotta put it down, nonethless. Maybe if I put it down, Ill be able to pick up hope for something new.

10/18/2016 10:03:05 PM
I don't understand men whose profile pictures are all of women. Doesn't tell me anything about you. I've heard the line "I'm just trying to show what I like". If I had nothing but cockshots on my profile to "show you what I like", how would you feel? How would you respond?

2/12/2013 12:37:04 AM

pursuing what you want is exhausting.


perhaps what i want could pursue me for a while...

2/12/2013 12:32:52 AM

2/12/2013 12:26:30 AM

Somewhere along the line, I've become impatient. When did that happen? 


Being a close second is an unpleasant consolation.


I sure hope that something better comes along.


I hope to get better at letting thing move through me. It isnt good to hold on to everything.

11/30/2012 2:40:43 AM

Haven't written out of soul (or anything other than damn school) in a while. In fact, I deleted all of my writings here and on other sites. I didn't want comments. I didn't feel the usual relief that sending words out into the ether usually brings  me. I didn't even want to see words put down by PastMe. 


I shut down...retreat....isolate...protect what's left. (Not much...and what is left is damaged extensively).


I've been out of focus...preoccupied with my own pain and misery. I can't rush the process or I'll end up having to repeat it. (Noobody likes remedial pain processing.) 


Time passes and I'm crawling forward. C-r-a-w-l-i-n-g...but the right direction.


I'm still full of bile and venom. Fully poisonous. I'm a wounded animal and, yes, I am mean. Ruthless and remorseless. I know I don't have much to offer in friendship right now, but I will again and that's important. There are moments.


I've got little patience and many have been told where to stick it. I'm pulling no punches and only have time for very specific games. It is what it is. 



 There is a purpose to the caustic rage. The boiling anger. As it subsides, it takes with it all the calcification of emotional baggage. It dissolves the garbage imposed by others. When it's gone, only my solid core will remain and I'll be able to rebuild on my solid self. I have no idea what that path will look like.


How's my focus?


Do you see me now?

11/30/2012 2:21:45 AM

I wrote this back in March but it's been on my mind lately. Cathartic writing? Perhaps...Maybe just a window into my devastation. 


I do bodywork on animals: massage and chiropractic. I got into it through my work with horses, coaching and training. Both fields have taught me the importance of alignment. If the body is misaligned, it can not perform to full potential and injury is not only possible, it's probable. A misalgined body has less strength, less flexibility, less fluidity, and less ability to heal.


In riding, if you are not properly aligned with your horse, you impede his movement, you prevent the behaviours you strive to attain (suppleness, relaxation...). Your alignment to other people is important too. How many disasters have resulted from getting involved with the 'wrong crowd'? To succeed, it is important to align yourself with those who share your goals, your ideals, your principles. To align with the wrong people is to sabatoge your ability to achieve your goals. It is also possible to have a misalignment, an incongruency , of words vs actions. When your words and actions are not aligned, you hurt the people closest to you: they can't trust you, rely on you, believe you. You are a liability to the herd, you cannot be counted on. Sometimes the misalignment is unintentional and unconscious but the result is the same. I'm seeing a lot of it and finding my tolerance is quickly dwindling.


I'm grieveing major losses. My immanent future holds more losses. I need honesty from those nearest and dearest to me, not lip service or pretty words.


When what you DO and what you SAY do not align, you are TELLING me something very clearly.


When you decided to end an 8 year, attempted poly, childless relationship with me to immediately persue a monogamous, childbearing relationship with your roomate who you plan to begin trying for children with in the next 8 months and you say to me "But we can still have sex", you are delusional. You are telling me you feel guilty for the abruptness and calousness of your decision. You are trivializing my poly heart and the depth of the love we shared. You dishonour our relationship and the new one by taking no time/space between to find yourself and grieve the loss....and it IS a loss, even if it's right and for the best.


You are misaligned.


When you ask me, on our anniversary, if i would like to "Have relations", despite my having told you how painful i find the phrasing, you are telling me that sex with me is a duty, an obligation, and there is no joy or spontenaity in it. You are also telling me that my feelings about it do not matter. If you think it's cute to play old, sexless, married couple, you will, regardless of how painful i find it.


You are misaligned.


When you tell me i am your "best friend" but you can't be bothered to call, text, email, communicate in any way, you are telling me i am not important to you but you want me to think i am.


You are misaligned.


When you say you love me, but there is no room in your life for me; when you have to set aside a day to fit me in, then spend half that day doing chores you didn't have time for the rest of the week, you are telling me i am a low priority for you, i am not worth making time for, i am another chore to deal with.


You are misaligned.


When you tell me you cannot take a day off work to hold space and be with me after i make the impossible decision to euthanize my soulmate, but that you're free the day after, you are telling me that your job, your money, are more important than providing the support you claim to offer me. You are telling me that you offer your love and support to me only if it fits your schedule and my current grief is inconvenient for you. i resent you for it. I'd rather you didn't offer.


You are misaligned.


When you "take sex off the table to avoid awkwardness" for me because i am hurting and you are trying to be compassionate you are telling me you can't read me and can't or wont ask for clarification of what i want. You clearly don't know me, you don't know what to do about my discomfort. Sex is the foundation of the relationship and you've offered little to nothing to take it's place. You are telling me you find it awkward not to know what i want and are uncomfortable when i tell you i don't know either. You can't wait, you are in a hurry to move ahead. I got the message.


You are misaligned.


When you tell me you want me as "involved" in your life as i want to be but important events in your future are booked with someone else months in advance, you are telling me i'd better hurry up or there will be no room for me to be involved. i am an afterthought, if scheduling permits. merely a grandfather clause and old baggage.


You are misaligned.


When you promise not to push or pressure me to meet your new girl because i am clearly unstable, hurting, and unable to handle it, then tell me i have to meet her one on one before an event, you are PUSHING ME to a place i have asserted i am not ready to be. You are telling me to hurry up and be okay with it. I will retreat and isolate before i will be backed into a corner. I will take my ball and go home.


You are misaligned.


When i am crying, venting my pain of loss that is so unhealthy to keep in (and everyone keeps insisting i should let out), and you rush to hand me tissues that i haven't asked you for, that i can see and am perfectly capable of reaching myself, you are telling me my emotional display is upsetting you and making you uncomfortable; you are telling me i should shut up. (Professional therapists do this one all the time. Drives me crazy) If you want to comfort me, put your arms around me and hold me you fool. Crying does not make me incapable of blowing my own nose.


You are misaligned.


When you constantly ask what i need, how can you help, but are frustrated when i tell you i don't know, you are telling me you are lazy and have no initiative. Suggest something. My mind is clearly too full of my own sorrow to see a way out. In the end, i will be the instigator and implementor of my own healing but if you really want to help, help, don't just wait for instructions like you're a useless robot without a command.


You are misaligned.


When you tell me i shouldn't bottle my emotions, that i should let them out and heal, then suggest i see a professional for help to "get out of [my] funk" when i express the pain in my head and heart, you are telling me i should only vent if it doesn't upset the status quo. You are telling me my emotions are ugly and wrong and should not be aired in public or even among "friends".


You are misaligned.


When you ask me how i am today and i tell you "not so good", your response of "nothing serious though?" tells me you are not interested in how i really am today because it might depress or upset you. You are telling me you are tired of my current emotional state and how long it's lasting; i should get over it and move along. Why ask how i am if you don't care to know?


You are misaligned.


When you read this journal entry and you think it's about you, you are suffering an over-inflated ego. It's all in my head.


I am misaligned.

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