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subbieblueeyes

subbieblueeyes - photo 1

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I am in the process of learning about myself and the lifestyle. Looking for locals that can help me with this....looking to learn all that's out there. I am more interested in seeing things done then playing right now.

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6/10/2007 7:16:58 AM
This is just a notice:  I will be closing/deactaivating my profile in the very near future.  I am on a journey to learn more about myself and where I fit into the lifestyle.  To those Ive made friends with you know how to get in contact with me and to the rest good luck in/on your journey/search.  And I shall leave by saying thank you for the lessons.

5/26/2007 8:03:45 AM
To those I havent replied to please forgive me, but things have been crazy lately. That is all for now, TTFN. ;)

5/25/2007 12:41:11 PM
Beautiful quote....

For beautiful eyes, look for the good in others; for beautiful lips, speak only words of kindness; and for poise, walk with the knowledge that you are never alone."

5/24/2007 9:11:43 PM
Ok it is 10:11 pm and I am off, going to bed. Night.

5/16/2007 3:50:19 PM
Reminder to self.....look for friends first, if things develop, great. If not, no big loss and noone is hurt.

5/15/2007 12:58:07 AM
Why does it seem like ppl only have an interest in me when I don't let them get close to me or let them in?  Why does it seem like ppl only have an interest in me when Im not interested in them? And why does it seem like once I let my guard down and start having/showing feelings they run and don't want anything to do with me anymore?

3/11/2007 2:26:36 PM
"this one does not want or need to be changed but does need structure an guidence an a firm hand to her backside when out of line as well as a strong pair of arms to hold me ."

I saw this on someones profile and decided to snag it.....for I couldnt have said it/things any better and I LOVE(D) it. 

2/27/2007 4:16:14 PM
Dudddeee!! Get some F*ing decency....you know who Im talking to. And also, take ya own advice....hence the journal entry complaining about how noone writes back to let u know they arent interested. 

2/24/2007 11:50:36 PM
Ok, just got back from going out with some friends, we went to dinner at Old Chicago and then tried this new country dance club that opened up.  While there I did TONS of shots including jagermeister and came to the realization, that if I start doing shots of jager I am DEFINATELY trying to drown memories of someone.  Ok, that is all for now, going to bed.   please note that the green hat is not a hat but a lamp shade. :P  Ohhh and stay tuned as to whether I end up having a hangover or not...Im hoping my friends' suggestion of taking an asprin n drinking a glass of milk does the trick. 

2/23/2007 3:24:09 PM
Ok, with the shit that went down last night I have chosen a song for/of the day and it is by Slipknot...in the lyrics it says, Damnit man, I knew it was a mistake.  I will get the title and lyrics when I get home.  K, that is all for now.

Mood: 

Edit: Ok, fI am home now, so now for the song.

Prosthetics

Even if you run... I will find you
I decided I wanted you
Now I know...I NEED
If you can't be bought, tougher than I thought
Keep in mind - I am with you
Never left out fate, can't concentrate
Even if you run...

YOU WILL BE MINE!
Ah, fucking you will be mine!
Ah, fucking you will be mine!
Ah, fucking you will be mine!

I FOUND YOU

Leanin' out of an open window
You laughed (my fingers clenched)
Too perfect, far too careless
I couldn't help myself - I just took you

DAMMIT MAN I KNEW IT WAS A MISTAKE (You brought it outta me)

Better make yourself at home
You're here to stay
You won't bother me...If you let me bother you
All the doors are locked, all the windows shut
KEEP IN MIND - I watch you
Never leave my side, never leave me, fucker
Even if you run

What the fuck is different? Man, I can't believe I'm doin' this

DAMMIT MAN I KNEW IT WAS A MISTAKE (You brought it outta me

I also found another song for/of the day:



Surfacing

Running out of ways to run
I can't see, I can't be
Over and over and under my skin
All this attention is DOING ME IN!

FUCK IT ALL! FUCK THIS WORLD!
FUCK EVERYTHING THAT YOU STAND FOR!
DON'T BELONG! DON'T EXIST!
DON'T GIVE A SHIT!
DON'T EVER JUDGE ME!

Picking through the parts exposed
Taking shape, taking shag
Over and over and under my skin
All this momentum is DOING ME IN!

FUCK IT ALL! FUCK THIS WORLD!
FUCK EVERYTHING THAT YOU STAND FOR!
DON'T BELONG! DON'T EXIST!
DON'T GIVE A SHIT!
DON'T EVER JUDGE ME!

You got all my love, livin' in your own hate
Drippin' hole man, hard step, no fate
Show you nuthin', but I ain't holdin' back
Every damn word I say is a sneak attack
When I get my hands on you
Ain't a fuck thing you can do
Get this cuz you're never gonna get me
I am the very disease you pretend to be

I am the push that makes you move


2/10/2007 1:22:09 PM
Wellll, I am back in CO and just finished my first week at/of work. And boy did it wipe me out, you see, I am now a Vet assistant, and I have SO much to get used to.  The most important one is getting up at 4:30am so I can be at work by 7:00am. 

On to other things....this is a new year and the year for improvement.  I have LOTS of changes/things planned for this year, so stay tuned. ;) :P

1/11/2007 11:32:23 AM
I am still in NJ so if I take awhile to respond, please forgive me.  Also, I shall be in NJ for a month or so more...so bear with me. Thnx! :)

11/26/2006 1:11:05 PM

PLEASE FORGIVE ME....
for not being around as much and/or being as active....Ive been going thru a hard time. About a week b4 thanksgiving my step mom made a comment out of the blue, asking me if I had talked to my parents back east about moving back in with them.  She also pointed out how I have nothing here holding me down/back here now. This comment has made me realize that I have to face the fact that Im not happy here. So, as of late, I have been trying to figure out how change this and it started with me calling my real mom back east and asking her if I could move back in and all I got was that this was not something that could be discussed over the phone and that we would discuss it when I was out there visiting for Christmas/New years.  At that point, I started feeling like I might not be able to talk them into letting me move back.   So, all in all, I have not been in the best of moods and havent felt like doing much.  This is an ongoing thing and it probably won't b resolved til the 1st of the yr.  So now you know why I havent been around much and probably wont be. That is all for now.


 


11/10/2006 11:56:09 AM
It's a beautiful day in the neighborhood...my b-day!!! :) :D  

10/17/2006 8:35:57 PM
UUuggg, stress...is there any way to get rid of it, COMPLETELY? Or would I have to stop living in order for that happen?  If anyone has any suggestions, Id be up for hearing em. :)

9/27/2006 7:05:34 PM
It is a somber (is that the right word?) day here.  There has been another school tragedy. :(  A young person has died and didnt get a chance to live life....how sad, VERY sad. :(

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Nikkyluv36
 
 Age: 38
 Packer, Washington