Collarspace.com

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Friends:
takemetiememary4ebony

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NOTE I HAVE CHANGED MY PROFILE TO REFLECT MY NEW NEEDS,PREFERENCES AND DESIRES and ANY change in my status. Therefore I suggest you read my updated journal for the most current description of what I am seeking. The rest of my profile remains unchanged.
1) I prefer intelligent partners.

2) I require honesty from my partners.

3) Long term relationships are more fulfilling than short term ones (whether they be friends, sexual partners, lovers or some combination).

4) I prefer people who can laugh at themselves and at me sometimes (I need to have fun with you in and out of the bedroom).

5) I prefer people who are forgiving (i.e. don't have a chip on their shoulder, don't insist I prove to them I am not the guy who years ago in another marriage or relationship disappointed her).

6) I like co-adventurers (i.e. those who are not jaded and still willing to try something a little different once in a while).

7) I get bored if all you offer is just sex (you should have other interests as I hope you will learn from me and I will learn from you).

Now,I suppose there are other lessons I have learned and I will learn more, but that should give you an idea about what I am looking for in any new relationship. Any questions I have for you are based on these lessons.

To avoid wasted time by both of us, please understand the following:

1) I am an honest guy and I expect honesty from you (i.e. I do what I say I will do, but don't try to wear me down and insist I do something I said I would not do).

2) I don't share pictures except with people I have actually met in person (as far as I am concerned, this site is like a party line and I don't want to share everything about me with everybody who has access to this site).

3) If I contact you or respond to your inquiry and express interest, I do plan to meet you face to face, usually in a public place for the first meeting. For that reason, I don't expect to spend weeks or months on end emailing or calling back and forth before that happens.

4) I have limits and will gladly share these with you early on. Also I will respect your limits.

5)I am non-judgmental and open to discussing anything with you once I determine I want to meet with you.

6) I am single but I do occasionally play with others. I would expect that we would keep each other aware of our status (single, married, coupled off etc) and any changes.

7) I have no established rigid rules about the height, weight, race, ethnicity, marital status, geographic location (I travel quite a lot) or sexual preferences of the women I meet on this site, since I am looking for something that does not fit into one of those neat little boxes. Other than the personal qualities I alluded to above, it is up to you to get to know me and for me to get to know you to see if we click as friends, sexual partners, lovers or otherwise. If you have a need to rigidly apply rules without getting to know me, our relationship may be doomed from the start.

I think the above provides a better picture of me than all the boxes you check off on this site. If you have questions chat with me, email me or meet me and ask.

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3/31/2012 8:31:56 AM

I have recently updated my profile but I realize I don't update my journal as often as I should.  

 

While my history has included various aspects of the lifestyle, I note I have made a fundamental change in my approach to it in recent months.

 

I have become much more clear in my own mind about what I seek.  First I am seeking a mature (in outlook and behavior, not necessarily age) sub who is not afraid of psychological and emotional commitment.  If you have suffered disappointments (we all have) that prevent you from pursuing a trusting committed relationship, please move on.   I don't wish to be the person that has to prove you wrong about the availability of Doms you can trust.

 

Second, I am seeking someone who will take the practical steps necessary to explore the possibility of a relationship.  For me this means preliminary communication online or by phone to find out a little bit about each other (no, you will not learn everything through this means), a safe meeting in person to see if there is chemistry and participation in real time activities together (most commonly this involves visits to museums, hiking, socializing in a variety of settings public and private), sexually intimacy when we both agree and a discussion of the kinds of activities we wish to share in the lifestyle.

 

Third, I am seeking someone who is willing to work with the realities of each of our life situations, whether it be time constraints due to work, kids (I don't have any), other family commitments, distance (I am not averse to the idea of travel within reason to visit my potential partner if we are committed to exploring a LTR. While it would be nice to find a single female sub who lives around the corner, works the same hours I do and has no baggage, I am realistic.  I am not perfect, and probably not perfectly situated.  Both of us are going to have to do some work here.

 

Finally, I am interested in finding someone who has some experience and some sense of what they are seeking from someone with some experience in the lifestyle.  I am not vanilla, but I do work in a vanilla work environment.  I don't seek someone is just exploring this lifestyle as a way to do an adventure, thinks this is a way to find romance because other venues have failed or is just curious.  

 

If you have questions, I prefer that you just ask (either in person or in your IMs or emails.

 

I look forward to hearing from you.


7/5/2011 3:34:20 PM

I have made a further update after learning from others that many of them are experiencing some of the same obstacles to meeting those other than picture collectors or "cyberers".

 

Please note I am most interested in meeting real people who share my interest in the his lifestyle.  Among other things, I see no reason for anybody to be rude (that includes, people who don't respond to inquiries even though there is nothing in your profile to suggest my inquiry is out of line).  I respond to all who contact me even if it is to say not interested.  I hope (but don't expect any more on this site) that everyone will respond likewise.  I don't intentionally contact anyone who has clearly indicated that they have no interest in someone like me (i.e. single male, live too far away, have a ls interest that is incompatible with mine etc.).

 

If you respond to my inquiry, I may say thank you for a polite turn down, but I don't persist or harass anybody after that.  I believe each person is entitled to his or her preference.

 

Some things I do expect if there is some interest on your part and/or my part are:

 

-we will meet face to face in a public place after no more than 1-5 emails or telephone conversations,

 

-we will both show up to the first meeting as agreed unless there is some really good reason,

 

-neither of us is expected to make up for some disappointment you may had in another relationship and

 

-while you may not be able to tell me everything about you in your profile, what you do include in the profile will be accurate. [If you don't want to share something about yourself before we meet in person, I can understand since it is a public profile, but don't lie.] 

 

If you have a question, ask.


9/25/2010 8:54:39 AM
I have made some changes to my profile.  It is a long time overdue.  Please read the full profile even if you have looked at me before.  I have made some significant changes.

7/12/2009 11:31:09 AM

This has been an interesting three months.  I have actually met several subs and slaves from here.  For the most part it has been pleasant.

Some things I have learned from my experience have reshaped my approach so that I don't waste a lot of time on those who only want to fantasize about this lifestyle online or who are just using this site as a substitute for "E-harmony.com. As a result:

1)  I will no longer provide pics to those I haven't met.  There are too many picture collectors or those who just get off of pics and conversation online.  As I am seeking a real relationship, not a couch potato who is not willing to invest time in meeting and getting to know someone.

2)  I will no longer respond to those profiles with numerous spelling and grammar errors.  To sustain a relationship you must have something in common.  I am looking for an intelligent as well as sensual person.  I think if you are too lazy to spell check or not intelligent enough to communicate in an effective way, I will get bored with you quickly.  I am looking for a long term relationship whether it be a friend or a partner.

3)  I will no longer waste time on those who don't actually want to meet face to face. I am not into cyber relationships and I really believe it takes times and willingness to spend time with each other to really enjoy each other fully.  If guys or gals are just interested in the high from a notch on the bed or the fantasy that love at first sight is the only road to go, I believe you will be very disappointed.  I have learned that so I don't need to travel wtih you as you relearn that over and over.  Face to face meeting (in a public place) is expected within a week of initial contact online.  That seems screen out secretly married, ambivalent participants or cyber addicts.

4)  I immediately end relationships if you lie to me or don't do what you say you are going to do (unless you have a believable and very good reason).  Self-deception is also included.  If I sense you are dishonest with yourself, I am out of here if you are confronted with that and you still continue the very obvious lie.  Come on. We are suppose to be grownups and the clock is ticking.

5)  I will stop apologizing for being protective of my friends and partners.  That is my nature.

So if you have read this, you should have a pretty good idea of what to expect from me after reading my profile.  If I contact you and any of the above turns you on, just politely say "not interested."  If it appeals to you just say "after reading your profile and journal entries", I am interested.  This will let know you read both and we can proceed without any unnecessary delays.

Happy finding to all of you.


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Countrybree2
 
 Age: 21
 North NJ, New Jersey