Severetorture

About meaning and depth…



i carry your heart with me
i carry your heart with me (i carry it in my heart)
i am never without it (anywhere i go you go, my dear; and whatever is done by only me is your doing,my darling)
i fear no fate (for you are my fate, my sweet)
i want no world (for beautiful you are my world, my true)
and it's you are whatever a moon has always meant
and whatever a sun will always sing is you

here is the deepest secret nobody knows (here is the root of the root and the bud of the bud and the sky of the sky of a tree called life; which grows higher than the soul can hope or mind can hide) and this is the wonder that's keeping the stars apart

i carry your heart (i carry it in my heart)



E. E. Cummings

Darkness… just darkness… absolute darkness… lights out… click

The break – as mentioned on 10/6/2012 – will be extended. For now I've given up on the idea/dream that I will actually find someone up here. Someone who shares the same values, who's willing and able to be truthfull and complete open, who's sincere in her desires, goals and dreams. So far, this 'place' has been nothing else then a disappointment and nightmare instead of an 'answer' and dream. It's shallow, meaningless and filled with emptyness.

Why do I even f@*cking bother? Courteousy, decency… it's for the old fashioned.

Early conclusion after – roughly – a month of presence. 99% is a thin and fragile layer of pretentions, a lot of talk and hardly any walk, people claiming to be something, people claiming to seek something… But in reality are shallow, meaningless and just looking for easy kink or simply nothing at all. Verbal play, pointless games and shallow conversation.

To emphasize, I seek someone who desires a harsh, extreme and perverted existence. But never without thought or sense. Always with depth, meaning, purpose and mutual commitment, dedication, respect and devotion. Someone who craves to seek, explore and discover het deepest and darkest thought, feelings and needs. To enrich both our hearts, minds and souls.

Oh … and uh … a compliment is a compliment, not a pick up trick. I've noticed only few can handle it. Typical … huh … ?

There has got to more then the 95% disinterest, superficiality and inability to maintain an open conversation that actually allow depth and mental enrichment. What happened to attention and a healthy sense of dedication I wonder?

The level of attention, plain commitment and common decency still frowns my eyebrows. What's up with ending a decent and respectful conversation without any word, not responding at all…? If you don't want to talk anymore or don't share the desire to talk back simply say so. Respect will always be given, I ask the same in return.

Deleted Unread… People using that functionality make my laugh out loud. I wonder what's behind that kind of behavior… Fear, inability to communicate, plain ignorance, weakness…? Guess the word indeed is mightier then the sword :-))