I have spent the past several years working and raising my children...now it's my time... I venture out from behind my desk, and I see a world that has gone on without me....I have missed too much already -- a choice I willingly made and would make again -- and now want to let the real me out of my head...I long to be taught to play in the shadows and fringes between pleasure and pain. I am strong-minded and willful in the conventional world and will need to be possessed, tamed and controlled in our private world....a world where the only rules are your rules - but only your rules...if it pleases you to watch me obey others' rules, I am not for you.

...most of my experience is all in my head, so you pretty much would be starting from ground zero with me. I am not interested in being half of the blind leading the blind. I am very strong-willed, and need someone stronger...I do not mean this to be a challenge or a battle of the wills, but simply someone who has a stronger will than I (I'm sure I didn't explain that very well, but hopefully you get the gist)....I want/need someone just that little bit better than me...better in all ways....someone who is not afraid to be all to me --Master, Daddy, lover, keeper of my goodness...bringer of punishment. bearer of pain, my best friend....a hero, not one who runs into burning buildings, but who makes wrong things right, and teaches me how to do the same -- for I am not always good and will not always do the right thing........be my hero.

...impossible to even try to explain this side of me that craves to be conquered...I need my rules and regs, I need my "box", I need limits, and I need them from one man, and only one...I do not like going on about MY needs, but only refer to them for the one man who has a strong need for someone like me...
...discipline me, punish me, love me, cherish me, and above all, own me as much as that can be possible....and do it because you can, because it is your right...because you are more than me..., more giving, stronger.......................just not prettier..:)


In return, I will give you all the respect I am capable of, and my very soul if you so demand...I give you myself to mold and polish into your most treasured possession; and hope you allow me to learn you, what makes you, you, so I know what you think and want and can serve you with honor......teach me the pleasure of pain....mix it all up, and make me scream for more.
...please

Looking for an intelligent and honorable man who can be strict and firm when I push the envelope too far or too often, balanced with a caring and loving hand. I will not push this same envelope "just for the hell of it", but because I truly need to know where the lines are drawn.

I am not looking for online cyber games, married men, or someone looking for a playmate while traveling...I want to build a LTR with someone, and if it doesn't work out, so be it -- but the possibility and hope must be there from the start...

(I keep rereading this, and still can't get it right, still can't get across what makes me, me, but I'll keep trying)