I was writing to one of my replies and as I wrote to him It made alot of sense to me that if I put this in my journal It might give many a bit more window into who I am. So here  is a portion of my reply::

I am willing to communicate  as much as I can, I will be honest with you I am not available for 24/7. I am pretty up front with my situation, so as not to confuse someone that has no interest in  someone that cant commit that way. I have been in the lifestyle now 17 yrs, I had a sasistic trainer many years ago that was involved with old guard.  I was formerly involved with a Daddy kind of Master for 5 years and then abandoned me and found out he was cheating on me for whole time and used me and dumped me when he found someone else.  I took a year away from any kind of lifestyle relationship and I am carefully, slowly, hurt and wounded looking for someone to fulfill my submissive needs. 

I just ask for patience, understanding, take my hand and lead me like a child to your world, surround me with safety and possabilities, and I will  follow you willingly and offer you span of control and power exchange. 

Contemplating putting a picture of some kind on my ad. Wondering if it is a mistake and it will bring out people that really arent reading my profile but reacting just to my picture.

At the same time I can tell that without the picture many arent viewing my ad because I know men are instinctually visual people.

guess I just talked myself into it.

secret

Why does it seem like everyone that writes to you here is in a huge hurry? Why do they move with such haste? Cant you just all slow down, talk, make friends, investigate....just slow it down a few knots.

Then please stop acting like you own someone the minute  they respond to you. An  invite to talk, to chat, to open dialogue really is just that.........not a collar locked around my throat and you own me.

Do others deal with this?

secret