saraisodaddy

My Personal Protocols, or Ways you won't be getting any Pussy

So many people seem to think that limits, consent, and negotiations only apply to sex and play, and not to other areas of life…but that’s just not true.  Just because I am a submissive does not mean I must agree to everything, or really anything you, a stranger, as a Dom tells me to do. What it comes down to is the fact that something is being stated as a limit with conditions: "If you want me to agree to do X with you, then you must agree to do Y, or I am going to decline."

3,751,354 Oklahomans 1,228,934 between age 25 and 49. (32.76%) 579,999 people in OKC (15.46% of OK) 50.8% female to 49.2% men 56% of adult Oklahomans are currently married Estimated 3.8% of Americans are gay, lesbian, bisexual, or transgender. 84.8% high school graduates 19% of all Americans make 250% of the poverty level (2.5 X 22350 = 55,875). (17.1% at or below poverty level in Oklahoma) {estimated 4% of total population is sociopathic, but we'll just set that aside.} 62.7% white (not all I like but we're doing it for the math)

SO: 579,999 X 32.76% = 190,008 OKC ppl my age range X 49.2% men = 93,484 X 44% single = 41,133 - 3.8% gay, bisexual, transgender = 39,570 x 84.8% high school grads = 33,555 x 18% for income = 6,040 X 62.7% white = 3,787

ok, so that's the hard math for unmarried straight white male high school grads with median(ish) income in my city.... 3,787 now for some fuzzy math: say 3 out of 10 guys like, no Love a girl my size, so we are down to 1,136 now 4% of all people are sociopaths. (sociopaths dig this chick for some reason) so we can add back in 151 for them..... 1,287 now, I have dated a fair bit over the years, and i'd say only 1 in 20 ever really get anywhere interesting...... 64 guys?

wow, the odds suck!

more than a few times lately, I've had fantasies about having my pussy fisted.  it's purely fantasy though, I've always torn at three fingers.  but that doesn't mean I don't want and crave more.  I want a man who wants to give me this, as badly as I want to take it for him.

I've had some time alone.  I've had some time with someone.  Now, I'm alone again.  Not sure what I want.  Definitely know I haven't found who I want yet. 

i'm ready.  i want a real relationship.  it's about time i stop fucking around.  now i just need to find the guy.  i don't think i'm asking for too much.  i just want to date.  like one day off a week and maybe 3 overnights a week?  from a cuddle buddy who can also be a great friend, and fun as fuck to talk to, and be around, even when we aren't doing the kinkiest shit possible?  yes, i want something that will last, yes i want it to last a long time, no i don't need to get married, no i don't want kids right now, no i don't want to live together, and yes i understand that no relationship starts out knowing if it will last.... these things don't mean you shouldn't commit to it fully to try, right?

i have this crazy timid streak. and my streak is getting wider (much like my behind) as i age. i think a weekend or even a night with you would be so much fun and staying with you sounds delightful. more than delightful.... delectable. naughty. fascinating. lascivious. and so much more.
it's the outings that cause the timidity. it isn't a safety issue. i believe you would protect me capably and easily. some of it is i wouldn't want to be an embarrassment.... or hold you back from having the best time you could possibly have. i'm not as outgoing or adventurous as i would like (you might have noticed). the rest of it is i wouldn't want everyone to see me. you know, the humiliation of every pair of eyes turning to stare at the one stranger in the room? or, (and i'm not sure which would feel worse) going to some place bdsm/public play/sexual and being completely invisible... not being noticed at all by anyone.
the very thought of it makes me blush, and not in that deep, 'my clit is throbbing', good sort of way, either. it isn't the sexy humiliation that can make me beg for naughty things. it's the terrifying, i can never leave my house again, crippling humiliation that can make me wish i were back in high school. i know, i'm rambling on and on...
i want what you offered. and i want to be brave enough to pounce on it and lick up all the cream like a bright eyed kitten. but i'm just a big pussy. i'm going to need a lot of guidance and help and pushing and maybe even a kick in the ass, once i get there. i know if anyone can help me come out of my protective coating to enjoy a new and foreign experience, it's you.
so knowing all that, are you still up for it? i'm a complicated girl, and quite the handful at times. you can change your mind. i will understand completely. but no matter what, i'd like to hear your thoughts.

i'm curious about the connection between lactation (especially without child) and BDSM.  i think i see what attracts the men, but what's in it for the girl?  especially if she has no urge to be treated like a cow or other animal?

who i really am is an extremely complex, dynamic individual.  someone completely capable of managing my own life and my own finances.  i'm an adult who does what's expected of me and what's best for everyone.  and no matter what sort of relationship i want, i expect to be treated like the capable, intelligent adult that i am.  i also expect to be able to treat you that way and not be disappointed. 

i wake with a start in the middle of the night. my heart is racing. my pussy is soaking wet and throbbing. there's no way i'm going back to sleep. i've had that dream again.
it starts in a bar where a tall dark and handsome man who offers to buy me a drink. i accept, his smile is dazzling and he's very sexy. we talk and laugh and flirt. but then it's time for me to leave and i don't take home strangers i meet in bars. as i unlock my front door, i get the feeling i'm being watched, but when i scan the street no one is there. i let myself in, sure to lock the door behind me. once i'm in bed, sleep doesn't come. i'm too turned on to sleep. that stranger in the bar really was amazing. before i know it, i'm rubbing my clit and pinching a nipple; the orgasms that follow are breathtaking. i fall into a deep sleep.
the next day, i run errnads. several times i feel like someone is looking at me, but when i turn around i realize i'm just being silly. i go out shopping and to dinner with friends, it's another late night when i get home. and i've got some shopping bags in the trunk to take in. my arms are full, i'm distracted, fumblling in the dark with my keys at the front door. i finally get the door open and step in with everything. before i have a chance to take more than a couple of steps, i hear the screen door move... was it the cat pushing the door to get outside? i drop the packages and turn to look, my eyes scanning the floor for the cat. before i can turn, he steps forward, grabbing me, one hand over my mouth, stepping into me so that i'm pushed off balance. no time to scream as he presses me against the wall, his body on mine.
i can't see him, i can feel him though. he seems very tall, muscular and powerful, with all his weight against me. even through my fear, my body automatically reacts to the strong man holding me pinned, i can feel my pussy getting damp. he leans in and whispers in my ear, "i couldn't let you go, i had to have you" and i realize i can feel his hard cock pressed against me. as i feel his hot breath on my neck i wonder what he plans to do with me, to me. my pulse quickens, my nipples harden, and an involuntary moan escapes my lips. i struggle to get free, i don't want it, not like this; but he so strong. as i wriggle, i realize i'm only making it worse for myself. now he has a hand covering my mouth and the other pinning both my wrists to the wall above my head.
it feels as though he's crushing me and i'm having a hard time breathing. i stop my fruitless struggle. his grips eases slightly, he asks if i'm going to be a good girl and promise not to scream; i nod. his hand lets go of my mouth, i can finally breathe again. then i gasp sharply, his hand covering my mouth moments ago is nowsliding up my thigh, yanking down my panties. i'm terrified, of what he'll do next and of my body's reactions. he immediately knows how wet i am, my panties are proof. "what a slutty pussy you have there darling!" he says fiercely, raising them to his nose to smell. they're soaked in my pussy juices, i can smell them from here so i know he knows. i begin to beg and plead. he tells me there will be none of that and shoves my panties in my mouth, effectively gagging me.
he pulls me away from the wall and propels me forward. before i know it, we're in my bedroom. he has me bent over the bed, pressed face down. he begins touching my entire body, constantly tell me what a whore i am for being turned on. i can't help it, his hands on my body are exhilirating! i occasionally moan quietly through my gag. finally he says "i can't wait anymore" and i hear his pants being unbuttoned and dropped to the floor. his hard cock pressing between my legs, searching for my tight pink hole. i feel his huge cockhead as he splits my pussy lips apart. no matter how much i try to fight he's too strong. i can't get away. and all my fighting is actually rubbing his cock along my pussy lips. i can feel it coating it. then i realize he isn't moving, only me. and i'm fighting him as hard as i can, but i'm also rubbing my pussy up and down the shaft of his cock. i get very still, the shame burning scarlet across my face. he begins teasing my pussy with the tip. it feels amazing and i buck my hips back against him. that was the signal he needed... he shoves the entire length of his cock deep into me. stretching me to my limit, hitting my cervix so hard i cry out. then he begins fucking me deep and fast. pummelling my pussy with his cock in a way i hadn't known was possible. he slaps my ass and i scream into my gag, then he begins pinching my nipples cruelly. that was all i could take. i begin to orgasm, squirting my fluids, clenching his cock, screaming out my orgasm. he continues to use my pussy, impaling me on his hard member over and over until finally he shoots his white hot load deep into my womb. he slides out and picks me up and tosses me onto the bed. as he comes toward me, cock still hard, he says: which hole shall i take next?
and only then do i realize it's the man i had met in the bar the night before.

i can't stop having this fantasy.  it's driving me crazy!

i'm very turned on at the sight of shibari, but honestly the idea terrifies me.  not that it doesn't make me damp, mind you, just that it's terrifying.  lately, it seems, it shows up in all my darkest fantasies.  i can't stop imagining it.

Sometimes, it doesn't seem worth the effort I put forward to ever consider topping or dominating someone.  I despair that I'll ever find someone who appreciates the effort I want to put forth on their behalf.  I feel like every submissive man I meet is completely willing to do as I please, so long as it's one of the three things that fit specifically into his niche of personal kink.  Otherwise, he can't be bothered to give me the time of day, much less do as he is told... even when it is for a larger purpose. 

What is the point of trying to get to know someone, every detail of what they like, what they're limits are, and what sort of fantasies they enjoy if nothing will work unless you do the specific things they like and enjoy?  I've been in vanilla relationships like that, and I didn't see the point then either.

As a sub, if I ask you nicely to do something, should you ignore my request, put it off,  procrastinate, or provide excuses why you don't feel like or want to do it?  If I ask again, more firmly, do you consider it, just because of the thrill you get from an aggressive woman?  Do you finally do as you were asked? 

And then how do you do it?  Do you follow instructions that were clearly, carefully laid out for you by someone who thought carefully about what She was asking of you? Had considered every detail of exactly how much of your soul She wanted you to bare?  Or maybe you simply think about yourself?  About how it's something you don't want to do?  Or maybe you consider the idea that if you do it poorly enough, She might punish you.  That idea is exhilarating, isn't it? You've been imagining her punishing you for days now; she was forceful earlier, so maybe if you just push her, you'll get what you want?

So you do it, that thing she's asked you repeatedly, and kindly, to do.  But not well.  Because.... well because why?  You can't see how it directly benefits you?  It's too hard?  You just don't wanna?  You don't want her to know how  you really feel?  what you're really thinking?  You want her to hurt you?  She isn't worth the effort?  She is asking too much of you?

The answer to all of this is, this sort of man exhausts me.  I'm looking for someone who will jump at the chance to do as I ask, and do it exceptionally well in hopes of pleasing me.  Doesn't everyone hope others will exceed their expecations?  Should I lower my expectations?  That's only going to work if I want low, small things from you.  And I wanted so very much more.  But you put your needs above mine, over something petty.  And if you'll do that over something minor, how will you behave when it's real?  when it is something much more deeply BDSM?  I can't see having a submissive like that... because that is not a submissve.  Or at least not one I would want.

"A gentleman is one who never hurts anyone's feelings unintentionally."  -Oscar Wilde

Whether you approach me as a sub, slave, or dom if you are rude, demeaning, aggressive, demanding, or otherwise inappropriate, you will get nowhere with me.  I am considerate and polite, I expect the same in return.  You do not have to be pushy or mean to be dominant, if you cannot do it without these traits then you do not know what you are doing.

I hate cameras, especially webcams.  never liked them, have never been comfortable on camera.  Feel like all my bad habits are caught in video. 

Before you even ask, don't start to wonder... I will NOT, under any circumstances, get on a webcam for you.  I don't put my face on here on purpose, why would I change that for some stranger?

It is my privacy and I take it very seriously.  This is a hard limit.  Just ask me to webcam if you'd like to be blocked.

That said, I am looking for men, approximately my age, in my area.  I am willing to discuss verification with locals.

start back to school today after several years out.  we will see how i do.  i might have to sacrifice my personal life for a while to get through.  but then again, i might need it even more to blow off some steam sometimes.

i am very curious about figging.  i've been reading about it and would like to talk with anyone with any in person experiences with it.  i'm not interested in being the receipient of anal play with it, but honest think i'd love it in my pussy.  i'd love to discuss other people's experiences.

When it comes to searching for a male sub (sub not slave) I want someone to fulfill my avid curiosity.... i want a man to worship my body, lick my pussy and toes on command.? i want to control his orgasms as well as use his ass for my pleasure... also i want to milk his prostate and force him to cum for me.? i want to give some pain, not much though and humiliation, maybe even make him wear panties for me. ? in the far distant future, i'd like to cage his cock and make him mine, body and mind.

Someone asked me what sort of things I'm curious to try on a sub. Well....
It depends on the sub but there are things I'm curious about. Strap ons and ass play, a little forced fem (panties and lipstick only), a lot of humiliation, pussy and foot worship of course, maybe even electrical play or trying out sounds... Then there's always orgasm control, cock caging, prostate milking, and cuckholding.

The pain I'm most curious about comes from spankings, punishment (if deserved), and CBT.  The cock and balls are amazing pieces of flesh that will absorb the most abusive treatment.  I guess I just want to see some of it firsthand with a guy who enjoys it.

Why do married men contact me? What is it that makes them think that would be acceptable? Unless your wife looks me if the eye and says "please fuck my husband" you would never get anywhere with me! If your profile has the word discreet in it (not regarding regular BDSM activities but my very existence) assume I am unable and unwilling. If you think I'm lying, try me, see if I don't find your wife and out you.

Same goes for men with girlfriends.  If you want more than she's giving you and it isn't an open relationship, LEAVE or SUCK IT UP.  Don't expect me to get involved.  I want good people in my life, not cowards.