I have stopped my search because I screwed up so bad. I had found someone who was going to be special. I lost her by my own stupidity because as I said to her in my first message she seemed "to good to be true" I was overwhelmed by my feelings for her. And as stupid as this may sound on a site like this I was more looking forward to doing all the vanilla things with her first because I knew how special the Dom/sub part was going to be. We parted friends and she had a lot on her plate and even though she said we were friends I have not heard from her since.

I tried to figure out why I'm even posting this. The only reason why I can come up with is I can't believe how many times she enters my thoughts. Can't figure out why I can't forgive myself. Can I still consider myself a Dom because I cared so much?

Guess I'm just venting to no one.......just still trying to figure why I miss her so.........