Collarspace.com

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I have been thinking a lot about how to change my profile in the past year.Getting to know yourself and being realistic helps a lot but is not always easy.So here it goes. Version number xxxx. LOL
WHO I AM
I am known on FL and ALT and in the community as subbieouchie or richie.Call me subbie or ouchie or richie. I have been involved in the lifestyle actively since the early 1990's. I have always described myself in terms of the lifestyleas a submissive/slave and a masochist.
I live in the Redding area of northern California. I am a more "mature" person.I would describe myself as smart, creative, sensitive, thoughtful, impulsive, childlike and silly. i am initially very shy, and generally gentle, and generally submissive but not weak. I can be intense in emotion and spontaneous and impulsive. i love to laugh and entice laughter, love to learn, observe and explore. I like experimental and edgy play.I can be bratty but only as a way to cause humor and playfulness in my partner. I have many dichotomies in my personality and that has always been a big challenge for me.
As a submissive/slave i know my place, am obedient, and relish my submission. I enjoy the feeling and symbology of a collar and feel proud at the feet of the woman who has me on her leash.
Inside i have identified myself most of my life as 'two spirited' or 'dual-natured' in terms of gender. I feel that i am both female and male. This is difficult for me but also an area that has shaped a lot of my life.
i am a professional, educated, work as a geographer/GIS analyst. I identify myself as an artist who is returning to art-making. I work as a free-lance GIS analyst and landscape visualization analyst. i have a fair amount of interests. I am right brained, ADD and have the mind of an artist. Yet i also have a science background so I can be very analytical. I have an inner core that believes in magic and earth bound spirituality and am awed by the natural world i live in. I tend towards Paganism and Goddess-oriented worship.
I am married in sort of a poly/mono type relationship, me being the poly, she being the mono. My wife knows both about my BDSM lifestyle and my being poly and we have worked for a long time finding the best way to accomodate my issues and interests in our marriage. She is not interested in BDSM or poly relationships for herself.
i have a lot of friends in the BDSM community. Most of my kinky friends live either in the Sacramento or SF Bay area.I usually try to get down to the Bay Area once or maybe even twice a month when i can. Since i work for myself my schedule is a little more flexible, though I also have committments around work, my art and interests as well as marriage and family.
I could create a long list of all the things kinky i like, love but really i would prefer talking about these things in person.
But I am very attracted to cruelty, authority and an imaginative, evilness, as well as softness, sensuality and loving.As i get older i am more interested in power exchange and D/s rather than just pure masochism. And i do believe that love and an emotional, physical connection is very important.
WHAT I AM SEEKING
I am seeking SECONDARY relationships and/or play partners with dominant and commanding women who are experienced and have all or some of these qualities I like: experimental, sadistic, sensual, strict, playfulness and fun. I love the BDSM lifestyle and I want to share that with another. I am open to different sorts of BDSM arrangements as long as they are honest, real and have a strong power exchange dynamic. I prefer women who are married or who have their own long term relationships, since I cannot be more than a Secondary. I am not excluding single women.
Ideally, I would like to have an ongoing poly type relationship, albeit secondary that allows the development of a real D/s relationship over time. I want to be able to serve and connect on a friendship, emotional, psychological and maybe sexual and/or spiritual level. It all depends how the relationship develops but I am open to exploring whatever is possible, realistic, mutually agreeable and desirable.
I believe strongly in service, obedience and an emphasis on mutually agreeable D/s power exchange. I believe in friendship, connection, andlove. And i believe in honest communication. Finally, i believe in doing my best to whoever I serve to please Her and adore Her.
If you want to know me more , please message me or email me. I would love to sit down and talk more or communicate through email or chat.

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12/10/2011 11:18:16 PM

Am i crazy to thinking about becoming a professional male slave? Is there an age where one no longer could even entertain such a thought? Not as a 24/7 deal but rather as a short term, days at a time, weekends, etc. I used to think about this all the time when i was younger but never tried such a thing.

It is not really about making tons of money but rather giving me the opportunity to serve a woman for a fee that would give me some money so that i could actually afford to come to San Francisco or Sacramento, and make a modest living.

I was seriously thinking about it tonight. Yes i need the money, not a lot of money but enough to pay bills, etc. I thought of myself maybe as a maid, a sissy maid. That has been a fantasy for as long as i can remember. But realistically, I can do lots of things, domestic, computer stuff, being a listener, being a friend or escort or serving as the heavy masochist i am. I love the dynamic of being dominated by a woman/women as anyone who knows me knows. I can enjoy being into the humiliation of my servitude. i am a pain slut, but also i believe caring and loving as well. I like to please. It is not a fantasy really because i have been a slave, albeit not 24/7. Anyone who knows me knows i can serve, obey well. So i ask:

Is there anyone who needs a slave for a few days?

Am i crazy?


7/5/2010 3:53:06 PM
I just posted a new profile.  Please feel free to send me a message or whatever.  Please, I am not looking for someone who lives out of my range of where i live, northern California, northern Nevada or southern Oregon.

thanks
ricar00

6/19/2008 3:22:13 PM

Sometimes i think chat rooms are tyrannous beings that suck you in and keep you there wringing time away from other things in your life. Not that there is not any free will involved, BUT sometimes it is so hard to escape the allure of the chat room.

i have been on chat rooms since around 1990 or so, starting out on Compuserv (HSX) and CB and migrating to IRC, then to Alt, CM and others. I remember the GOOD old days when you had to pay for the minutes on Compuserv, when my internet bills almost cost me my financial life.

Thank the Goddess that the Internet as it is came to be and chat rooms sites became free, well sort of free or relatively free, okay not free but not as expensive as by the minute.

Maybe it is me, but i still often get hooked when i enter a chat room.  I talk to people who i know personally, who i don't know personally, who live all over the world. I get hooked because i know i should be doing other things, but i can't as if i am a ZOMBIE attached to the chat room.

I used to play online a lot with BDSM, gender roles, etc and may still very rarely, and occasionally play online. The allure of getting off kept me going a lot on online scening until i migrated to phone sex, then later to actually r/t play, scenes and D/s relationships.

I had very very intense online D/s relationships with dominant women who could get me to do almost anything (remembering the anal training, the CBT done by me listening to her enjoy my suffering, the bondage, etc etc etc etc etc etc.)

Once in awhile i meet a dominant woman who knows how to manipulate and psychologically dominate me online and those women to me are gems because i so am submissive even if online and does it ever turn me on to be dominated psychologically, interrogated, etc.

But the days of scening online are pretty much boring to me these days, especially compared to real life domination and submission. But there is that occasional domme that piques my interest... LOL

Maybe i should get my webcam fixed, who knows, maybe i will rediscover the joys of internet masturbation and submissive pain and pleasure. But then i would not do such a thing without permission from my Owner.

These days i go everyday into chat rooms to talk to friends, to keep in touch with my Goddess when she is on, to meet new people, to share ideas when the conversations are interesting.

Once i am on, i get hooked most of the time. Sometimes i will come on and say i will be only a few minutes and end up staying an hour. Most of the time i will chat and say i am leaving, but take another half hour to leave.

I so need my Goddess to tell me to leave so i can get other things in my life done, to limit my time, or at least some surrogate domme who tells me to get the hell off the chat rooms.

Yes i have free choice, yes i can easily just shut the chat room off, yes i can easily pull the plug, maybe even electrify my walls so i can't get near the computer. But i don't.

Ah the tyranny of chat rooms. She Rules and often that SHE is CHAT.


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KittySweet
 
 Age: 67
 Denver, Colorado