not looking for forgiveness i don't need it i am me just that .. and this is part of the whole that makes this girl whom she is ... a submissive at heart and soul the honor of the surrender the need to feel a whole ... always looking for friends ~~ blessings just the gypsy
These Dreams Heart
Spare a little candle Save some light for me Figures up ahead Moving in the trees White skin in linen Perfume on my wrist And the full moon that hangs over These dreams in the mist
Darkness on the edge Shadows where I stand I search for the time On a watch with no hands I want to see you clearly Come closer than this But all I remember Are the dreams in the mist
These dreams go on when I close my eyes Every second of the night I live another life These dreams that sleep when it's cold outside Every moment I'm awake the further I'm away
Is it cloak n dagger Could it be spring or fall I walk without a cut Through a stained glass wall Weaker in my eyesight The candle in my grip And words that have no form Are falling from my lips
These dreams go on when I close my eyes Every second of the night I live another life These dreams that sleep when it's cold outside Every moment I'm awake the further I'm away
There's something out there I can't resist I need to hide away from the pain There's something out there I can't resist
The sweetest song is silence That I've ever heard Funny how your feet In dreams never touch the earth In a wood full of princes Freedom is a kiss But the prince hides his face From dreams in the mist
These dreams go on when I close my eyes Every second of the night I live another life These dreams that sleep when it's cold outside Every moment I'm awake the further I'm away
And you.....Could bring me to my knees...Again. All the times.....When I could beg you please...In vein. All the times.....When I felt insecure...For you And I leave.....My burdens at the door...
But I'm on the outside, I'm lookin in. I can see through you, see your true colors. Cuz inside your ugly, your ugly like me. I can see through you, see to the real you.
All the times.....That I felt like this won't end...It's for you. And I taste.....What I could never have...It was from you. All the times...That I've cried...My intentions...Were full of pride. But I waste.....More time than anyone...
But I'm on the outside, I'm lookin in. I can see through you, see your true colors. Cuz inside your ugly, your ugly like me. I can see through you, see to the real you.
All the times.....That I've cried... All this wasted....It's all inside... And I feel.....All this pain... Stuffed it down.....It's back again... And I lie.....Here in bed... All alone.....I can't mend...But I feel...Tomorrow will be ok.
I'm on the outside and I'm lookin in. I can see through you, see your true colors. Cuz inside your ugly, your ugly like me. I can see through you, see to the real you.
:: smiles ... still i don't trust myself but starting to think that is a good thing ...
"And maybe someday we'll figure all this out Try to put an end to all our doubt Try to find a way to make things better now that Maybe someday we'll live our lives out loud We'll be better off somehow, someday"
:::: smiles for a certain Cheshire Cat
I whispered, 'I am too young,' And then, 'I am old enough'; Wherefore I threw a penny To find out if I might love. 'Go and love, go and love, young man, If the lady be young and fair.' Ah, penny, brown penny, brown penny, I am looped in the loops of her hair.
O love is the crooked thing, There is nobody wise enough To find out all that is in it, For he would be thinking of love Till the stars had run away And the shadows eaten the moon. Ah, penny, brown penny, brown penny, One cannot begin it too soon.
Sometimes I feel there is a hole inside of me...An emptiness that, at times, seems to burn. I think if you lifted my heart to your ear, you could probably hear the ocean. And the moon tonight: there's a circle around it - a sign of trouble not far behind. I have this dream of being whole...of not going to sleep each night wanting, but still sometimes, when the wind is warm or the crickets sing, I dream of a love that even time will lie down and be still for. I just want someone to love me. I want to be seen. I don't know...maybe I've had my happiness. I don't want to believe it, but there is no man...only that moon. (full quote)
; ) 8th grade
One more night I'd like to lie and hold you Yes and feel... To make you smile, I'd like to be there for you-- Have you forgotten me?
And the days go by Doing nothing about them... How much time will I have to spend?
My mind won't rest and I don't sleep Not even in my dreams...
If you ever did believe, for my sake... If you ever did believe....
"Every night without you is more than I can bear Moonlight can be torture When your love isn't there I see you in the shadows I can hear you in the wind Think of you and I can feel my world closing in I can't sleep I keep wishing I could touch you I'd be fine if I could make it through Through these"
Cruel nights Cruel nights Missing you nights What do I do nights Cruel nights without your love
the 4th .. fireworks and sulfur ... ... love the light the sound like the storm .. inside me but i .. am caged ... the wind my ...foe
Girl : Will you cater to every fantasy that I've got? Will ya hose me down with holy water - if I get too hot - ? Will you take me to places that I've never known?
So I'm back to the velvet underground Back to the floor that I love To a room with some lace and paper flowers Back to the gypsy, that I was to the gypsy, that I was
And it all comes down to you Well you know that it does, well Lightning strikes, maybe once, maybe twice Oh and it lights up the night And you see your gypsy You see your gypsy
To the gypsy That remains She faces freedom With a little fear I have no fear I have only love And if I was a child And the child was enough Enough for me to love Enough to love
She is dancing away from you now She was just a wish She was just a wish And her memory is all that is left for you now You see your gypsy You see your gypsy
Lightning strikes, maybe once, maybe twice And it all comes down to you Oh and it all comes down to you Lightning strikes, maybe once, maybe twice And it all comes down to you
I still see your bright eyes And it all comes down to you
( Sir)
Hello again, your words they make me smile. As I drift away in my little room upstairs. Then I realize I don't even know your name. If we could share our time, would I disappoint your fantasies? But I believe that I could be the one you're needed 'cause I'm...
[Reff:] Only lonely on the inside Didn't mean to take away your dreams. Only lonely on the inside When you close your eyes to your deepest thoughts
And I could start to give apologies for all the stupid things that I will say and I will do. If we should ever cross the same place at the same time would your world skip a beat 'cause it was me? If we could share our life would I disappoint your memories? I believe that you could be the one I'm needed. And I'm...
[Repeat Reff]
If I could give back your hopes, your joys, your treasures, don't you think that I would change my world? But there's so many things trying to pull us together. And even though we're far apart, I can still watch you walk away.
Only lonely on the inside [2x.] When you close your eyes what do you see? Only lonely on the inside. Didn't mean to take away your dreams. Only lonely on the inside. When you close your eyes, what do you see? Only lonely on the inside. When you close your eyes, in your deepest thoughts, do you see me? Only lonely on the inside. I didn't mean to steal your dream away. Only lonely on the inside. I'm only lonely when you're gone...
~~wind-cool and powerful a full moon bright and new .. me
(a blessed eve)
Broken
Wake up to a sunny day, Not a cloud up in the sky Then it starts to rain. My defenses hit the ground, and they shatter all around So open and exposed But I find strength in the struggle Face to face with my trouble
Chorus: When you're broken, in a million little pieces And you're trying, but you can't hold on anymore Every tear falls down for a reason Don't you stop believing in yourself When you're broken.
Little girl don't be so blue I know what you're going through Don't let it beat you up. Hitting walls and getting scars Only makes you who you are Only makes you who you are. No matter how much your heart is aching There is beauty in the breaking Yeah
Better days are you gonna find you once again Everything will find its place
When you're broken, when you're broken
Oh when you're broken When you're broken When you're broken
and the wind blows me back to the ground ... no more angel wings left with which to fly ... ~~...grounded...~~
back to numb .. should have known .. numb suits me .. did i dare i to .. believe ..
~~ bye
silence echo's .. loudly
wow .. no more words are needed .. i just keep thinking .. i need sleep and wow
thank you Sir .. it will be a pleasure to return a favor
i think for once .. i am understood .. i am a me and with that ... He still wants 'me' .. all the past behind .. all the tomorrows to go .. .. 8th grade again Sir... thank You for that .. ~~ his soul ..
think i found the words ...
It's amazing how you can speak right to my heart Without saying a word you can light up the dark Try as I may I could never explain What I hear when you don't say a thing
The smile on your face lets me know that you need me There's a truth in your eyes sayin' you'll never leave me The touch of your hand says you'll catch me if ever I fall You say it best when you say nothing at all
All day long I can hear people talking out loud But when you hold me near, you drown out the crowd Old Mr. Webster could never define What's being said between your heart and mine
The smile on your face lets me know that you need me There's a truth in your eyes sayin' you'll never leave me The touch of your hand says you'll catch me if ever I fall You say it best when you say nothing at all
The smile on your face lets me know that you need me There's a truth in your eyes sayin' you'll never leave me The touch of your hand says you'll catch me if ever I fall You say it best when you say nothing at all
just a gypsy
One time around the block 2 times around the clock 3 times don't cross the little lady
So pretty & oh so bold Got a heart full of gold on a lonely road She said "I don't even think that God can save me"
(Am I) gaining ground (Am I) losing face (Have I) lost & found by Saving Grace Thankful for the gift My Angel's gave me
Born alone We die alone And I'm just sittin' here by the phone Waitin for the Lord to send my callin'
Any man says it's Heaven & Hell Prob'ly got somethin' useless to sell You ask me if I'm saved but what's it to ya?
Blow a quarter Cop another eighth You're runnin' out of high, you're losin' your faith Throw your hands up & scream *hallelujah*
hallelujah x4 Amen
One time around the sun another year older and my work ain't done it's time for me to write the final chapter
Deal the cards & roll the dice sex drugs & rock n roll are my only vice tryin' to figure out just what's here after
hallelujah x6 Amen
Leather And Lace
Is love so fragile... And the heart so hollow Shatter with words... Impossible to follow You're saying I'm fragile... I try not to be I search only... for something I can't see
I have my own life... and I am stronger Than you know But I carry this feeling When you walked into my house That you won't be walking out the door Still I carry this feeling When you walked into my house That you won't be walking out the door
Lovers forever... face to face My city or mountains Stay with me stay I need you to love me I need you today Give to me your leather... Take from me... my lace
You in the moonlight With your sleepy eyes Could you ever love a man like me And you were right When I walked into your house I knew I'd never want to leave Sometimes I'm a strong man Sometimes cold and scared And sometimes I cry But that time I saw you I knew with you to light my nights Somehow I'd get by First time I saw you I knew with you to light my nights Somehow I would get by
Lovers forever... face to face My city or mountains Stay with me stay I need you to love me I need you today Give to me your leather... Take from me... my lace
Lovers forever... face to face My city or mountains Stay with me stay I need you to love me I need you to stay Give to me your leather Take from me... my lace
~~ just words Sir ??
Sir ?
How can you see into my eyes Like open doors? Lading you down into my core, Where I've become so numb.
Without a soul, My spirit's sleeping somewhere cold, Until you find it there and lead it back Home.
(Wake me up) Wake me up inside. (I can?t wake up) Wake me up inside. (Save me) Call my name and save me from the dark. (Wake me up) Bid my blood to run. (I can?t wake up) Before I come undone. (Save me) Save me from the nothing I've become.
Now that I know what I'm without, You can't just leave me. Breathe into me and make me real. Bring me to life.
(Wake me up) Wake me up inside. (I can?t wake up) Wake me up inside. (Save me) Call my name and save me from the dark. (Wake me up) Bid my blood to run. (I can?t wake up) Before I come undone. (Save me) Save me from the nothing I've become.
Bring me to life. (I've been living a lie. There's nothing inside) Bring me to life.
Frozen inside without your touch, Without your love, darling. Only you are the life among the dead.
(All of this sight, I can't believe I couldn't see Kept in the dark but you were there in front of me) I've been sleeping a 1000 years it seems. I've got to open my eyes to everything. (Without a thought Without a voice Without a soul Don't let me die here. There must be something more). Bring me to life.
(Wake me up) Wake me up inside. (I can?t wake up) Wake me up inside. (Save me) Call my name and save me from the dark. (Wake me up) Bid my blood to run. (I can?t wake up) Before I come undone. (Save me) Save me from the nothing I've become.
Bring me to life. (I've been living a lie. There's nothing inside) Bring me to life
Sir ... you know its true ... tell me these words don't ring true
"Our past is a story existing only in our minds. Look, analyze, understand, and forgive. Then, as quickly as possible, chuck it. "
:: giggles
would love to say .. its easy but its not ... i have great friends one certain Cheshire Cat that helps me to keep putting one foot ... before the other ..
~~blessings gypsy
"Somewhere I Belong"
(When this began) I had nothing to say And I get lost in the nothingness inside of me (I was confused) And I let it all out to find That I?m not the only person with these things in mind (Inside of me) But all that they can see the words revealed Is the only real thing that I?ve got left to feel (Nothing to lose) Just stuck, hollow and alone And the fault is my own, and the fault is my own
[Chorus] I wanna heal, I wanna feel what I thought was never real I wanna let go of the pain I?ve felt so long (Erase all the pain till it?s gone) I wanna heal, I wanna feel like I?m close to something real I wanna find something I?ve wanted all along Somewhere I belong
And I?ve got nothing to say I can?t believe I didn?t fall right down on my face (I was confused) Looking everywhere only to find That it?s not the way I had imagined it all in my mind (So what am I) What do I have but negativity ?Cause I can?t justify the way, everyone is looking at me (Nothing to lose) Nothing to gain, hollow and alone And the fault is my own, and the fault is my own
[Repeat Chorus]
I will never know myself until I do this on my own And I will never feel anything else, until my wounds are healed I will never be anything till I break away from me I will break away, I'll find myself today
[Repeat Chorus]
I wanna heal, I wanna feel like I?m somewhere I belong I wanna heal, I wanna feel like I?m somewhere I belong Somewhere I belong
The path that I'm walkin', I must go alone I must take the baby steps 'til I'm full grown, full grown Fairy tales don't always have a happy ending, do they? And I foresee the dark ahead if I stay
"Equal dark, equal light Flow in Circle, deep insight Blessed Be, Blessed Be The transformation of energy! So it flows, out it goes Three-fold back it shall be Blessed Be, Blessed Be The transformation of energy!" - Night An'Fey, Transformation of Energy
release
that slow first sting
so small is the slice ..
just a beat of a pulse
you feel cold as ice
push it harder
and feel the rush
warmth mixed with the stinging
followed by the gush
with the warm caress
as the subtle stain
strange are the emotions
that wash away the pain
simple a release
but to each their own
the silver white scar ...
hardly is shown
not a deep dark secret
just with me it shall stay
my god and my goddess
will not give me away
We were born before the wind Also younger than the sun Ere the bonnie boat was won as we sailed into the mystic Hark, now hear the sailors cry Smell the sea and feel the sky Let your soul and spirit fly into the mystic
And when that fog horn blows I will be coming home And when the fog horn blows I want to hear it I don't have to fear it
And I want to rock your gypsy soul Just like way back in the days of old And magnificently we will flow into the mystic
When that fog horn blows you know I will be coming home And when that fog horn whistle blows I got to hear it I don't have to fear it
And I want to rock your gypsy soul Just like way back in the days of old And together we will flow into the mystic Come on girl...
lets try this again .. not trying to be 'rude' or 'mean' just honestly .. please don't ..send mail to brag about things i really don't care about ..
having a great day ... and still laughing at some mail .. ( yeah i blocked you ) 'can't we all just get along' ... lol for those who have shared .. a shoulder and offered an ear .. thank you Sir's .. so much .. for the care and concern .. ~~ blessings to you all
laughs ok .. please read profile .. not a domme .. or dominant .. ( a few husbands might disagree) but .. still i am a submissive .. back here after a bad relationship .. trying again .. to feel myself in this world ... please do not send me email .. about .. your 'sizZeE' adults only .. i am over 40 .. so please be 'mature' ~~ bright blessings soul
a great storm .. knocked me offline for a few days .. but a blessing it was .. to read a book and sleep with peace .. all seems to be right in the world .. and most wrongs are righted .. and there is a spring in my step and a smile on my face .. much thanks to blessed friends .. to many to name
~~the full moon rite sky clad .. new beginnings
The 28th day She'll be bleeding again And in lupine ways We'll alleviate the pain
Unholy water Sanguine addiction Those silver bullets A last blood benediction
It is her moon time When there's iron in the air A rusted essence Woman may I know you're there
Hey wolf moon Come cast your spell on me Hey wolf moon Come cast your spell on me
Don't spill a drop dear Let me kiss the curse away Yourself in my mouth Will you leave me with your taste?
Beware The woods at night Beware The lunar light
~~ learning again ... to .. breathe the silence is to loud ...
"Breathe (2 AM)"
2 AM and she calls me 'cause I'm still awake, "Can you help me unravel my latest mistake?, I don't love him. Winter just wasn't my season" Yeah we walk through the doors, so accusing their eyes Like they have any right at all to criticize, Hypocrites. You're all here for the very same reason
'Cause you can't jump the track, we're like cars on a cable And life's like an hourglass, glued to the table No one can find the rewind button, girl. So cradle your head in your hands And breathe... just breathe, Oh breathe, just breathe
May he turned 21 on the base at Fort Bliss "Just a day" he said down to the flask in his fist, "Ain't been sober, since maybe October of last year." Here in town you can tell he's been down for a while, But, my God, it's so beautiful when the boy smiles, Wanna hold him. Maybe I'll just sing about it.
Cause you can't jump the track, we're like cars on a cable, And life's like an hourglass, glued to the table. No one can find the rewind button, boys, So cradle your head in your hands, And breathe... just breathe, Oh breathe, just breathe
There's a light at each end of this tunnel, You shout 'cause you're just as far in as you'll ever be out And these mistakes you've made, you'll just make them again If you only try turning around.
2 AM and I'm still awake, writing a song If I get it all down on paper, it's no longer inside of me, Threatening the life it belongs to And I feel like I'm naked in front of the crowd Cause these words are my diary, screaming out loud And I know that you'll use them, however you want to
But you can't jump the track, we're like cars on a cable, And life's like an hourglass, glued to the table No one can find the rewind button now Sing it if you understand. and breathe, just breathe woah breathe, just breathe, Oh breathe, just breathe, Oh breathe, just
after thoughts.....
How do you cool your lips After a summer?s kiss How do you rid the sweat After the body bliss How do you turn your eyes From the romantic glare How do you block the sound Of a voice you?d know anywhere
Oh, I really should have known By the time you drove me home By the vagueness in your eyes Your casual good-byes By the chill in your embrace The expression on your face That told me Maybe You might have some advice to give On how to be Insensitive Insensitive Insensitive
How do you numb your skin After the warmest touch How do you slow your blood After the body rush How do you free your soul After you?ve found a friend How do you teach your heart It?s a crime to fall in love again
Oh, you probably won?t remember me It?s probably ancient history I?m one of the chosen few Who went ahead and fell for you I?m out of hope, I?m out of touch I fell too fast, I feel too much I thought that you might have Some advice to give on how to be Insensitive
when all you thought .. was wrong' and all you believed was wrong how do you find right .. how to believe in the lifestyle... in friendship again ?
Thanks Sir for all the support and help
strange how time changes nothing.. yet i feel so different .. to those friends who found me that fast ... thanks .. luv to you all for the support and encouragement
