PrincessViolet

Male Dominant, 25, Philadelphia, Pennsylvania

Male Submissive, 40

Submissive Couple, 45, Simi Valley, California

I am going to come clean. This is not me, not fully. I have split my personality into so many different personas under different names that I find it difficult to keep up with them all. I mean that in the sense of if one day I don't feel like the icey, strong version of me, then I can operate as the more sensitive side of me and ignore the other built up persona for a while. This isn't fair on people who message me though as sometimes I cannot bring myself to answer messages, I don't know what to say or most of the time I just don't have the time. So in light of that I am going to condense my personalities back into one whole person, I don't care if I'm going to show flaws as a Dominant, because I admit that I'm human... but I have exceptional abilities to work through flaws and down-times, that's what makes me me. So say goodbye to Violet, I'm just going to use my 'Aurorian' profile for everything now. Feel free to say hi to me over there.

I appear to have neglected this journal for a while. Day to day life has been too draining to keep up with such things. Sometimes having all the time in the world to think is much more tiring than having a full day of activities. I'm not sure what I'm looking for right now. Sometimes attention, other times solitude.

Obviously my profile must be a little misleading. I don't have much time to write at the moment, but I must be clear on a few things. - I am mostly dominant. If I am ever submissive it will be with somebody whom I think is fit to serve. I doubt I will meet this person anytime soon as it will have to be somebody pretty damn special. - I do not spend all of my time online. Sometimes I don't login for days. Sometimes weeks. Do not get offended if I don't answer you for a while and absolutely do not turn your offense into a silly message then send it to me. - I'll know when I click with somebody, I'll know when I want to talk to them on a messenger service or even meet them in real life. Until I decide that, I just want to chat casually via messages. Thanks, Violet

Today I feel like revealing a little more about myself. I will try to update this blog as much as I can as I am learning about myself to some extent too. So, about me. I have been a Domme before, and although sometimes I enjoyed it and it gave me a rush, other times it was rather draining. I don't think the fact that it was my job helped. The concept of strangers coming for a service was not very appealing. I feel much more comfortable in the role of "Princess". Being a Princess, I am able to accept worship with glee, but also praise others. I am a very respectful, kind-hearted person generally. Sometimes however, I want to be evil... but evil to people who would enjoy it. I recently ended a relationship I was in for 3 years. In those 3 years I lost hope for a fairytale relationship and became a lot more realistic. Good or bad, it opened my eyes. Since I don't believe my fairytale fantasy will ever come true, I want other kinds of relationships - yep, plural. I want to meet lots of interesting people, I want to be attracted to people and have contact with them. But my most important relationship is the one I have with myself. I have fought my way through the world and know I can rely on myself. I enjoy my own time and I will never again give it all away to somebody else. As for my wish for a Daddy, I suppose you are wondering what my actual father was like? Well, he was great, from what I remember. When I was around 6 years old my parents seperated and he left our home. Every now and then he would send me funny letters telling me how much he loved me. Then the contact dropped and I would see him maybe every 4 years. I still loved him very much. It only got worse from there though, contact with my dad meant negativity, mostly from psychotic girlfriends (one was abusive towards me... so I tried to kill her when I was 8 years old!). It wasn't until a few years ago that I was told he was an alcoholic, it all became clear then. Our relationship changed and I felt like the parent. He was in an abusive relationship and came to me once for an escape. I couldn't help him though and had to pay for his ticket home. Then, some time later I got a call to tell me he was in hospital. I went to visit him and he looked awful, there was only a faint whisper of the great man I remembered in his eyes. Then, last year, his disease took over and he died. I wasn't told he was in hospital this time, I was only contacted after he had passed, so I never got the chance to say goodbye. It was then upon me to arrange and pay for his funeral. I was helped a little by some family members, but none of them had much money. I had some saved as I was about to move to a new flat, so that fell through and I had to live at my mother's - whom I love very much indeed, but we don't get on in close quarters. I felt angry at my dad for a while, I got by most of my life without him, I stood strong through the negativity his life brought, then this. I had to do it though because I remembered the man he was before alcohol changed him. He was fantastic and I love him so much. So maybe now I feel like being looked after in some way. Feel like being spoilt. Feel like I deserve it. Maybe you agree, maybe you don't. I am still exploring myself and what it is I want. Life is not black and white/Dom and sub for me. There are too many conflicting thoughts in my head at all times. Right now, I just want to play. Violet

Just so you know, informal messages will get an informal response. I will not reply to messages that do not refer to me by name as they have obviously been copied and pasted to many different people. I'm not really interested in having jokes sent to me and I also will not reply to messages that do not make sense. I do my best to reply to proper messages from genuine people but it's hard with so many junk messages flying around. Violet

Me and my friend/housemate Princess Scarlett have decided that we would like to go to Las Vegas to see Richard Cheese live. He is our favourite. He is playing in July but that is a little too soon as neither of us have the money for proper holidays. We will find a way though as we both deserve it and Mr Cheese is retiring next year so we simply MUST see him. Princess Scarlett is brilliant fun, I'm so glad we live together. It's only been a few months but I've not had as much fun in years as I've had living here.

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