PrincessFiasco

Well this slave has managed to unravel all the hard works progress of months of striving to prove herself with one dumb dumb action. Such a stupid stupid slave, you definetly should know better after all you have been through, you deserve whatever fate awaits your dumb wothless ass.......to be continued

Well where to begin I guess at the point where submission was essential in the better interest of everything. Sometimes you have got to let go to truly realize the scope of the big picture. Understanding comes from not trying to understand, once you give up all control and thought it is as plain as the nose on your face, the more you search it out and try to concur it the more unfathomable it becomes, like an apparation.  Once full and total control are given away one can truly enjoy the freedom of being owned property, it all comes with time and then the true understanding of ones purpose comes to light.

I know just random rambling oh well......

Well Master has managed to do it again, he has mentally gotten ahold of my fears and is asking me to submit to them willingly, this is going to be a rough task but hey its what i signed up for. the only thing is i hope to overcome my anxiety over the situation and give in to what he needs from me. i know it is something that is inevitable and ill have to face it sooner or later so i might as well get it over with so we all can move forward to more pertinent and fun things. i trust him fully and adore his patience, but still have reservations because of a very negative situation from the past. Thank you for being understanding with my reseverations Master and for teaching me that my submission must come willingly and from the heart. i will not disappointment you when the time comes to pay up for my mistakes.

Slavery is not glamorous, it doesnt automatically give you a free ride. Slavery is a lot of hard work and dedication to your Master/Mistress and requires an individual who isnt lazy, who enjoys serving and also one that isnt afraid to have no limits, lets face it subs have limits slaves have only the limits their Master/Mistress allow them, and these change with the mood or desires of the dominant person. So in essence if you can't hack having no control over every aspect of your life, being used and slightly abused, serving one Master the rest of your life, and possibly never being allowed any personal space or freedom then maybe slavery isnt for you think about being a submissive first and see how that goes. After all true slaves that love serving their Master are rare, usually they just hate the job. I am the type that no matter how my Master uses me or how i am commanded to serve him there is a smile on my face and in my heart the whole while. Master I truly love being yours and Maam's to use as you see fit, thank you both for this opportunity to serve you and earn my place on the floor by your feet.

Punishment and pain are essential in the development of any well balanced slave, I know this because lately I have found myself getting punished more and more since I make dumb choices that are better left to my Master's discretion. I need to think less and obey more, after all I am here to please and serve him, not to think.  I know that the road from here on out is going to get rougher each time I disobey and his rules will become stricter, but as I grow into the perfect slave for him this will serve only as a reminder that he is Master and I am slave, he is the one who rules my entire being and decides my fate I am just the vessel to get the job done for him, and through this I am free......

The Awakening

So my journey has begun, I have found my place, my home, why is it then I have a desire to rebel against the ones who have accepted me for who and what I am? It is very unnerving that I can’t seem to figure this out. Everything is beautiful for me, I love my situation, I love my new home, I love the fact that I can once again trust and submit to two wonderful people who are great in so many ways.

Why then do I want to rebel against it? I have thought and thought on the matter and can’t seem to come to any understanding except that I am testing the waters to see how far I can get. I guess my need for strict discipline that I never got growing up is rearing its ugly head. Now another pertinent question, how do I stop these negative behaviors? It is going to be hard since that’s the way I gauge people to see how far I can push before they finally stop me in my tracks.

I guess I need to be put in my place but no one but my very first Master (Carlos) has ever been able to do this, many have tried and all have failed since him. Yes my submission is given freely but for some reason I need to be dominated in every sense of the word, truly feel owned, taken, and taught my place. In order for me to fully give into the fact I am owned I need that rude awakening I so desperately seek, the harshness of it, and the reality of it, the pain and humiliation of it.

Maybe then and only then can I obey 100% and not fight all of these feelings that are butting heads within me. I am stubborn and hardheaded and need to be conditioned and taught. Sometimes I guess I have been spoiled so much that I feel I can just do what I want. I know some of my behaviors are wrong but i the only way to address them is to  awaken the reality within me.

Sometimes you find friendships and relationships in the strangest of places and you dont realize how much you like someone until they go away. I miss her already....Have a safe trip, I can't wait till you get back Ma'am.....

 =( =( =(   missin you bunches