pnkybrat

To care about someone so much it hurts can suck like hell when you have no idea what is going on with them.  I am looking at the messages stacking up in my messagebox and the only person I am looking for a message from isnt responding.. I have 2 weeks left of my break from school.  I have had the same cold for like 2 weeks and I am freezing cold and hating the snow.  I would do anything for him to even talk to me again but because I am a fuck up I dont think that will ever be the case again.  it sucks to care so much about someone and know you broke your own heart.  I wish I could go back in time to last year when I first met him.  I wish things were different but I have to live with the here and now.  The here and now facts are that I wish I could drop to my knees and beg for him to even talk to me again.  I would do anything .... .sacrifice anything.  I love him so much that even though were not speaking I am still trying to put my life together.

I am so in love with someone I cant have in my life. I miss him so much it hurts. He was my Master and I still need him. I would have done anything to make him happy. I was devoted to him alone. The sound of his voice and the way he made me feel. I guess I am screwed because as much as I can be stubborn and bratty I need him but I lost him. I have tried so hard to move on and do hat he asked by getting my life together but its hard when you dont have the person in your life anymore that makes you push harder and be better. I can be a smartass with a fresh mouth but he knew how to reel me back to reality.. I am stuck on whether to move on and find someone else or wait for him because he said I would be his slave always. I want to be his.. I want to worship him in every way.

So on new years all I wanted was to get a year back jump on the plane and be with you. I miss you so much it freaking hurts. I emailed a happy birthday but I don't think you use it anymore. Its hard when I want to text you in the morning and I hope everything is OK. I want to obey you and please you. I have changed so much in my life and the only Master I want is you.

Female Dominant, 32

Male Switch, 42, st.louis, Missouri

Female Dominant, 21, Escondido, California

Female Dominant, 25

Male Submissive, 42, st.louis, Missouri

Female Switch, 27, Riverside, California

Female Switch, 24, Riverside, California

Male Submissive, 25

Female Switch, 23, Riverside, California

Female Switch, 38

Male Submissive, 42

Male Dominant, 31, ontario