PigFarmer14612

if you're going to steal photos off of the web to pretend it's you at least make sure they're all of the same girl :) or if you're asian, be sure to steal asian girl photos and not white girl pics. and if you're going to claim to be from kansas city, don't put your weight in kilos etc...i feel that even if you're going to have a fake profile you should at least put some effort into it.  don't be a lazy shitbag all your life.

I get a kick out of when a profile appears on 01/17/14 for instance in the morning.  talking about how you're looking for this that or the other thing. then a couple hours later it's all been changed to owned by "darkknight05533" he owns me mind, body and soul and i am giving him my all... he monitors all me email and any contact goes through him.  all in the span of about 90 minutes.  talk about speed dating; you can barely get to know where someone went to school or what they had for lunch in under an hour yet these idiots claim to have gone from strangers to a life-long TPE relationship and total slavery in under 60 minutes. breathtakingly goofy and retarded. 

I get the distinct impression many of you don't know what you truely are asking for. 50 Shades of Grey has warped your minds. torture and abuse and true depravity is not what you housewives are reading in your smut books. you know not what you ask ..

when you're from chicago, NY, and have a one-paragraph profile with spelling, grammar and syntax errors galore, you've got a single, blurry photo supposedly of yourself yet it's in actuality a screen cap of some pornstar, and you haven't viewed my profile yet send me a one sentence message saying to contact you at a 3rd party email address... I know you're not a real person and you're phishing for email addresses or some other nefarious activity. I have no time for your games, go play them with someone else. you're going to be deleted unread.

Statistically speaking, adult women who weigh less than 110 pounds are very rare. the idea weight for an adult woman over 5 feet tall is at the least 115 pounds and closer to 120 in order to keep her BMI within a healthy range of 18.5 to 24.9. yet it seems like 2/3rds of the women on collarme are 104, 107, 106, under 100 lol.  on the plus side it does help to weed out the fakes and the masturbating men, especially after midnight. horny, masturbating men have no idea about how a woman's physiology works and have less of a clue about their bodies. it likely explains why they're pretending to be women and jacking to the internet rather than with an actual woman.

if you have the word beautiful in your account name yet your face looks like the seat of a motorcycle then you're just being silly.  while all fat chicks are assuredly big, they're not all beautiful either - the BBW is a misnomer and it allows piggies to lie to themselves.  yes some fatties can in fact be pretty in the face and if they know how to dress and keep themselves put together can be attractive in their over-sized inimitable way, but most of them are not in fact Big Beautiful Women. they're just big

The time wasters, wankers, and all around horny fucks who want to masturbate to collarme are on after 11pm.  the serious people who are genuinely looking tend to be on during the mornings.  those who's companies have a more liberal internet website surfing policy tend to be on around lunch time. 

i really tend to not accept chat requests or take emails seriously when they come late at night.

i also find myself coming to collarme less and less in general.

this goes out to all the men who dress as women, or wish they were women, or someday hope to have surgery to turn themselves into women, or in fact have done so... while i am happy for you that you can be the bitch you've always craved to be, you are NOT in fact a woman legitimately and i'm guessing 99% of the straight men on this site are not interested in a ladyboi with an adams apple. 

there is a tranny option for your profile. regardless of what you THINK you are, the rest of us don't consider you a woman.  i'm confident there are dommes and doms who are looking for a tranny and they'd love to hear from you.  the vast majority however, myeslf included, are looking for actual women.

i couldn't care less about your lifestyle choices and am glad you're going down your path in life... just don't have any interst and the mislabeling of your gender purposefully just does yourself and others a disservice and wastes time. 

the acronym BBW has been annoying me alot lately.  it seems like a lie much of the time - Big Beautiful Woman.  some Big women are in fact Beautiful.  they have beautiful faces, take care of their appearance and dress themselves well and carry themselves with a confidence and enjoyable personality.  most Big women however, are just buckets of yuck;  not having the self control to go to the gym each day and not having the drive to eat healthy meals of normal portions does not make you Beautiful. 

i see in so many profiles where it says 'WARNING' .. you can't use this for research or blah blah blah....

was just wondering? what exactly is gigglepants69, or NYcharlie99 or any other internet profile random person going to do if someone DOES take their information down for some reason?