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Already discovered that I should move some stuff from my journals to the top of my description. *NOT CURRENTLY LOOKING TO FORM A DATING/BDSM RELATIONSHIP UNTI I AM ALL SETTLED DOWN!* I am not willing to relocate at this time. I am not willing to be with anyone over the age of 30 (I have a 10-year margin and that's final). I am not willing to be with anyone over 200 lbs unless they are really tall and/or athletic (I don't like the idea that the person who is supposed to control me can't control them self).
Here is what I am though. I'm a bit older now, and I've had a lot more freedom being able to travel on my own. I've had some experience, received the obligatory T-shirt, and now I'm interested in more. I put "bisexual" as my orientation because at this point I have no idea what I prefer and would love some help finding out.
My family was very over-protective and would not allow me to date. I slowly became aware of this world and because my family knows nothing about computers I was able to do *ahem* research on this lifestyle. There is still so much I don't know about though. I would like to talk to someone about trying the many things I have only dreamed about so far.
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Wow, it's been a while. Not much news to print anyway, other than I've had some open-ended vanilla relationships since I last wrote and have developed a platonic D/s relationship with a woman recently. She is not my owner, we are not loyal to each other, and we do not engage in any sensual play aspects at this moment but we are doing fine. Still too busy for a real, intense level of commitment like I dream of though, so I am still not seriously seeking but using this site to speak with a few friends I have made here and there.
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Well, I'm back. No longer innocent, no longer naive, no longer completely lacking in experience. Thanks NYC for providing me with a glut of venues for those life steps. Still not looking for anything permanent, but I will be spending my summer this time at home in LA so I am interested in getting in touch with people for possibly a 3-month thing if we click.
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Well, I'm finally back in the States. I'm spending some time with some family in NY until my classes start in a few months. I'm sure that I will go home to LA soon to spend some time with my parents, but with plane tickets costing as much as they do right now I'm not sure when that will happen. Anyway I just don't think I'm ready yet to get into any type of relationship. I'm not going to move for anyone except my school, so until I am attending I'm not going to start anything.
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Yippie! I got in touch with some of the schools I applied to and a few of them (the really, REALLY good ones) that were really after me last year apparently still want me and have said I don't need to reapply. I just need to pick one right now and then send in a letter of intent to register for the fall. So, I may not be home exactly but I will be in the states again and I have some family back east which is probably where I will end up.
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Well, I have decided that I just don't like being in the UK. Nothing personal to everyone here, it's just that I grew up in sunny LA and always vacationed in hot, semi-tropical areas before. This was the first year in my life that I have touched snow, and I have to say that I don't get the hype. I'm also just not getting used to the food; I miss the wider range of tastes to be found in LA. I think I'll reapply to some of the other colleges that accepted me last year and hopefully I can get back to the states because I miss the closeness of my family. Isn't it crazy how once you finally leave the restraints and confines of home, you start to miss them? Or perhaps it is just my submissive side coming out and longing for the control I no longer have.
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I went home to LA for the holidays, but my family is already pissed by it. My mother is upset that I came home for the white side of the family's seasonal celebrations but that I won't be able to come home for Chinese New Year in February because of school. When she is upset my dad gets mad, and then the aunts start arguments about who in our family technically belong to what ethnic group and all hell breaks loose. I am always amazed at how someone can sound so PC and racist at the same time, but the people in my family seem to do it. Oh well, it wouldn't be a holiday with the family if there was no drama, right? Finally though, I was able to have access to some funds that my grandmother left me so I can stop worrying about how to pay for my food and the next year of college. I was barely scraping by back in the UK, especially since I was freezing and had no winter clothes. Now I can buy some proper coats and not run around wearing 6 layers of my LA street clothes, yippie!
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Hi everyone, I have a few moments to write right now. Everything is going fine but wow it is completely different here from LA. Classes just started and as I hoped they would be they are very challenging. I really like my classes and I'm thinking of just barreling through the year and taking classes during the off-seasons instead of going home. I haven't been able to get a job yet as I am waiting for the paperwork on my visa to go through (thanks everyone for that help), but I'm all little too busy with homework and studying anyway. Still too busy to have any real discussions with anyone on this site, for friendship or otherwise. I really prefer to make friends with the people around me in the real world anyway, so you might not want to waste your time because even if you write to me for friendship you will not be high on my priorities list.
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Ok, short update time even though I don't think anyone cares and no one reads these things. So far I like my new home. Especially at this time of the year when it's cool here and my dad tells me that it is 112 degrees at home. I always hated the hot weather, so I'm finding England to be heaven. Not sure though about buying winter clothes because I've never had to before plus everything is so expensive here! I think it might be cheaper to buy things online from the US and have them shipped to me here rather than buy anything here. I wish I could do that with my food too, it is getting expensive to just eat. I'm getting used to my area for now, familiarizing myself with the school and the city around it. I'm thinking about getting a job, but I'm not sure if I need a visa like you do in the States. Oh and I'm madly in love with just about anyone who talks. I had no idea I was such an accent whore!
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So, I feel like I need to call off this search. I'm moving to attend college, and everything is so hectic that I don't feel right trying to establish a relationship of any kind at the moment. I'll still get online to talk to some friends I've made, but I won't respond to any emails from others unless they just want to be friends.
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I feel so sad. Not just because of the recent event in my life that some of you know about. I am sad because of the sheer amount of people writing to me who just don't get it. Yes, towards some of you I have been hostile. I have learned that nothing I say to those that I don't want to talk to and who wrote to me without reading my profile will change them. I guess I felt I could, but I realize now it's pointless. I'm just going to quit. I'm just going to delete all emails sent to me in my bulk folder from now on. I'm also a bit depressed that people keep telling me I am not a slave, I am a dominant. Well duh I'm not a slave; I am learning and it is something I aspire to be. I am dominant in my vanilla life, it was how I was raised to be. I have always needed to be in control of myself and my daily life, and now at age 18 I'm tired of it. I have long wanted someone to come and show me that I do not need to be in control, that I can give it up to them instead. My eventual slavery will be my freedom; do you have what it takes to release me? I no longer want to be dominant. Yet I am not going to just lay down and let the first jack-ass who comes along comand me. I have a brain, a spirit, dreams for the future, and I have been raised to only give true respect to those who earn it. Putting the word "master" in your screen name does not earn respect. Actions and words do, so choose yours carefully if you truly want me.
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Lots of changes in my life in the last few days. I am not going to be online for some time though. I will come back, but right now I don't know what I will be able to.
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I hate that I need to say this, but if I don't write back to your first email I probably won't write to your third, forth, etc. My attention is not captured by anyone who write to me less than a paragraph, I don't care if you are local, just because you might live 20 minutes from doesn't mean I want to fuck you. I realize that there are a lot of you who take a lot of time and effort to write to me, but it is impossible to write back to everyone who writes to me. I have to pick and chose, and if I have not chosen you please stop writing to me. You just didn't have what I was looking for. Also, I am looking for someone who is experienced. This does not mean "old" and I understand that experience can be gained in this lifestyle regardless of lawful age. I don't care if you are the same age as me, but if you are inexperienced with sex and BDSM you are not someone I want to talk to. I need someone who has done this stuff before and knows what they are doing.
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I have blessedly figured out how to use the mail controls and how to block people. If you write to me and you are over 28 or out-of-state, you will be put in the bulk inbox. I will block and hide most of these people who end up in this box (I will check the messages first, and will only talk to out-of-state people if they have the intention of moving to CA). I do not need anymore people offering guidance so please stop because you are just wasting my time, your time, and space in my screen. I don't like to waste anything. If you hotlist me and you are over 28 or out of state, I will block and hide you.
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I am a fast learner people. Graduating 2 years early from one of the most rigorous private school programs = not an idiot. Do not preach to me about being safe or that no one my own age knows anything about being a real dominant. I may be new, but this is not my first day on Earth. Thank you for your concern, but I know how to be safe. I also know that there are people out there who are good dominants at an age where most of you didn't even know this lifestyle existed. Also, if you send me the EXACT same letter 3 times, it's a pretty good indicator that you incapable of independent or creative thought, so that little factoid gets you a block. Think about what a form letter says about your ability as a dominant people! If you cannot take the time to actually read and personally address my own profile (or anyone else's for that matter) you will never get a response.
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WOW! Less than 20 minutes, and I already can't keep up. I think I should have been a little more clear in who I am and what I am looking for. About me: When I said that I've had no experience, I really mean it. I have never had any type of relationship that wasn't a family or platonic relationship. I am virgin territory people, mentally and physically. I need to talk to people who will not get frustrated when I say "I don't know" when they ask about what I feel about a certain topic.
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| Age: 26 |
| Milwaukee,
Wisconsin |
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