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Female Submissive, 33, O
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About mynder
This may get a bit vivid. I have a twisted sexual history.
After being molested at age 5 and again at 14 I somehow allowed myself
to get taken advantage of and used in regards to sex. It took me many
years to heal and much pain to get to where I am now and I can have a
healthy sexual experience with my current boyfriend. I stayed at his
house when he was renting a room out of a bachelors pad and I understood
and accepted that Playboy magazines were on every toilet and the toilet
seats were always up. One day he came to the kitchen with a boner kissing
on me and whatnot, a short while after I went up to the bathroom where he
had been showering and found a Playboy open. Are you kidding me? How dare
he have the audacity to come to me with a boner he got from a slut in a
magazine? It was talked about and made clear I am not comfortable with that
whatsoever, he should be loyal to me mind body and soul, and I should be
enough for him; as it is likewise.
It's been months since then. I found some porn videos on his phone last week
and it really repulsed me. I get dressed up for him, I go down on him, I put
out frequently. We do get kinky. Now the reason this video offended me so much
is I do let him [ejaculate] on my [breasts]: its a thrill for him. In this porn
video there's a girl who looks like me, disturbing enough as is, and shes giving
a guy a blowjob till he [ejaculates] on her [breasts], then she turns to the next
guy and does it again. Screen changes and she's [having intercourse] from behind
and he [ejaculates] in her, then she crawls forward and starts giving another guy
head as yet another comes up to [have sex with her] from behind as well. TOO FAR.
It's not your basic porn scene, and it bothers me that its a twisted repulsive
obscene image of something him and I share intimately. We've just moved in together
and I can't imagine ever letting him see me naked again. I feel like he twisted
our passionate and beautiful sex into some perverted expression of his twisted fantasies.
I've tried hard enough to overlook some of our kinky experience in the past, but
right now
I can't take it anymore. I'm now a strong lady and I just want my good life back.
I'm only trying to be open minded, thats all about me, right here, right now.
I just need friends, real time friends for now, Please.
THANK YOU ALL FOR YOUR ADVICE, WRONG PLACE TO BE INDEED, FOR MY TYPE.
ANYWAY WE CAN BE PENFRIENDS SINCE I WON'T BE HERE ANYMORE.
REACH ME IF YOU ARE ONLY FRIENDLY, DON'T FEEL BOTHERED IF YOU KNOW YOU ARE NOT COOL WITH THIS.
mailto:mynders12@yahoo.com
Byeeeeeeeeeeee................ Friends |
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