Thankfully things got better. Well, not quite, but i changed my attitude and I feel much better. Always have to remember that almost every problem with time becomes insignificant and silly. I fixed what I could and let go what I couldn't. 

I want to say thank you to all of you Men, who supported me with your kind words. 

I don't like this week so far, I don't like it at all. Everything that could go wrong, did just that - went wrong. 

This much emotional pain makes me numb. And the worst I have no one to turn to for comfort. 

I hope you're all doing much better though!

ok, there's positive entry.

I don't see as many fakes as people cry about, I do find a lot of good people here and I think I am blessed with those who stay in my life as friends or more. Message board brings me a lot of knowledge and information.  

I am angry, but not at you, nor at myself. I am mad because it is extremely hard to find the one i'm looking for. You can call it PMS, what the hell:)

I am not that bad over all...

whoever LOVES my profile and isn't even on the "Who's viewing me" list:

not interested:)

Doms, stop annoying with "you subs are so rude and disrespectful to ME, DOM!!! you don't answer on my messages!!!".

I used to reply to all messages, I'd respectfully decline ones I don't like and then I'd have to spend my time explaining WHY I don't want to give them a chance. It came down to Doms begging to have a date with me...really? are you fucking serious?

What do you want me to tell you? I can tell the truth like, I don't like you because you are too short for me, or you're looking like a serial killer, or you are 43, but look worse than a 70 year old, but who is going to feel good from it?

What happened recently:

dom, "Hey, i'm not into poly too"

me, "Hey, right? poly sucks, mono rules blah blah blah"

The next fucking line he writes to me is:

DOM, "I'D MAKE YOU WEAR THONGS ALL THE TIME"

me, "WTF??? what did just happen? did I just jumped into some space and time bending wormhole and skipped the entire life experience with that man?

second of all, I fucking hate thongs!"

Sir, one more time I regret we cannot be together. I wish every Dom could converse like You do.

I am back and it saddens me. There are so many "I wish" right now, but the situation is out of my hands.

I am not naive, nor weak, nor insane, nor stupid. Is that why it is so painfully disappointing to read through doms' messages? I hope tomorrow will be better.