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Everybody has to go and listen to this song immediately. I command it!
I mean I order you to go now!
I would lend my gift of submission to Satan for this song, it's that amazing!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9K86RTbZqkQ
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Someone wants to get on meara's wall of shame so here goes.....
~~
fuck you yuh cunt. I want to take you naked in that berka and lead you through downtown. Every now and then I will pull you toward me and kiss you while pulling your dress up to expiose your ass to the guy watching.
I'd make your humilliation complete . you fucken whore (sic)
~~
I feel like writing back and saying something along the line of "thank you for your email. I'd love to fly away with you on your private jet.... oh you didn't mention a private jet and loads of cash.... Funny I don't seem to mention being paraded downtown and being kissed by 60 year old men.... ah fuck it then...." |
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I was recently asked by one of my legions (by legions I mean 3) of readers about institutions stealing my pics. Well I'll have you know that I've presently got a lawsuit against Sidney University (when my lawyer - who is always on retainer - finds said university).
Back story: The bastards stole one of my Hello Kitty pics and are using it in a dissertation on the gifting of submission and Hello Kitty's lack of a mouth- even though I had pics of my breasts- ripe for the stealin'- up as well.
After being a victim of this horrific Gif-fy plagiarism I removed said pic from this site to prevent the folks who are too lazy to Google for themselves from stealing with ease. Now I've heard all about how there is no such thing as a Sidney University and now won't all those naysayers be pissed when I'm rolling around in the big money. Ha! I say, Ha!
Now it was also noted that the one time I did math all by myself using only my fingers and toes, my percentage of bitch vs. oral fixation was inflated by 10%. The one fucking time I don't use a calculator. I'm gonna be suing over that too as well. I'm litigative like that.
The shame and humiliation of the above has caused untold damage to my self esteem. This is worse than that time I found a short brown curly hair between my breasts that wasn't mine. What more must I endure?!
That alone folks must be worth at least $3.87. The shame people, not the hair.
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Apparently all 2 of my readers finally got curious enough to ask why this has not been uopdated lately.
Well I'd love to tellk you that I've been tied up with some crazy groovy dude beating the hell out of me but unless you count World of Warcraft battlegrounds where the Horde have been beating the hell out of me, I'd be lying.
So the truth is I've been playing WoW. But you gotta know that my gear score is awesome and my dps is great!
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I quit.....!
SMOKING!
meara: now comes with 68% increased oral fixation and 42% more bitch. |
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Hey Canucks, did you remember to VOTE? |
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Oh gag me with a spoon. Beat me with a shovel. Do something! I just now had the misfortune of reading what is possibly the worst load of shite I've read since castlerealm existed to educate all twue swabes and domlies. Now I'm subjecting you folks to it because honestly I'm going to have to
slaughter a goat to get it out of my head and I'm not going it alone!"Words all slaves and submissives should reflect upon:From the
cowardice that dares not face new truths, From the laziness that is
content with half-truths, From the feminine arrogance that thinks it
knows all truths, From the greed that values money, material objects
and image as the truths, From the self-conceit that my physical beauty
entitles me to a special life, From the ignorance that women were not
born to serve, From the stupidity that calls for me to prostitute
myself for money over love and all such false truths, From the
confusion that keeps my authentic voice from seeking and speaking all
truths,From the self doubt that I cannot be my best through His molding
and His truths, From the fear that keeps me from my true submissive
self – the greatest of all truths, [and now for the coup de grace] From the bondage of self, Good Master, deliver me." Sweet baby Jesus. How on earth/gor/mars do people come up with this shit?Good Master, deliver me?!Really really?I am truly at a loss for words.
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If I should fall from grace with god
Where no doctor can relieve me
If I'm buried 'neath the sod
But the angels won't receive me
Let me go boys
Let me go boys
Let me go down in the mud
Where the rivers all run dry
I'm partial to Shane baby! lack of teeth and all!
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I'm sleepy.
After doing a quick load of laundry and getting it on the line. I think I'm going to have a nap.
That's all.
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Why oh why doesn't cm have an option for kicking and punching (like let's say in the girly bits?)
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A new rant by meara.....copied from my profile on FL cause there's where it all began. ~~~~
Online predator's FTW!
Good grief! I am so fucking tired of people moaning about online
predators and warning the rest of us about them I could just barf.
I know I know, it's to protect the stupid subwissives who need a
twue dom to keep her/him safe. Even though by virtue of being in an
adult site, they presumably are adults who can participate in
decisions about the kind of government we have in this country. They
can drive a vehicle legally and legally purchase alcohol. OMG and they probably have been supporting themselves and possibly even children by their own means.
But nooooooooooooooooooo even though most women have been in charge
of their own sexuality since they had that first orgasm back in their
youth, they are unable to protect themselves from a douche online who
is tailoring profiles to their needs. They had better be warned. OMG
they are at risk! Nine eleven to the community (for what it's worth) as
a whole!
Fuck off.
If you are mentally competent enough to do all of the above and
consent to letting other folks do all sorts of wonderful things to your
body and mind, you're probably smart enough to suss out a loser online
and for sure by the first meeting or two.
If you're not, get a public guardian, you're retarded and shouldn't be playing anyway.
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I've been completely obsessed with K'naan's Waving Flag song.
The version he did for the World Cup.
Oh my God I love this song!
That's all.
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Fellow bottoms/submissives, laundry doers and finicky types, this could change your life.
I'm fricking obsessed and I'm practicing but not yet perfect.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=b5AWQ5aBjgE
On yet another houseworky note, today for the first time, I made my own pie crust.
I was making quiche and was too lazy to go to the store to buy a pie crust so I figured I'd make one. I know I could have just baked the quiche sans crust but I've done them like that lately and it's just not as yummy.
The crust was awful! I'm talkin' blech yuck, horrid. And I do mean horrid.
And it was hard like a rock. A good quality orthodontia 'don't spend another dime on your teeth if you plan to eat this' destroying rock.
Even da hound refused it.
Now that my friends equals Epic Fail!
The quiche part was fantastic as always but Ima gonna leave the pie crust making to my mom or Pillsbury.
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Sometimes (actually rarely) I wish I was bent toward dominance. I like to think that if I were a dom I'd be getting my laundry and housework done by someone else.
And before all you fem doms cry out, 'noooo that's soooo not what you'd get meara. In fact you'd be inundated with emails from boys begging you to stick pins in their balls but oh no you'd certainly not get your housework done' .
I do know this.
I've my fair share of emails from overly eager boys - you know the ones who don't actually read the part of my profile that says "A bottom with a submission complex" - who ask to lick my feet or that I staple their cock or.... well you know.
I have wondered at times if this is as a result of my failure to lower case the letter 'I' when referring to myself.
Anyway, back to my fantasy of having a someone do all the work around here- someone other than me that is. My house would be spic and span and I would lounge around barking out dusting orders.
The cold glass of water in the face is that if I were bent that way and I did have a nice subly subwell to do my bidding, I'd have to give something in return and I have no interest in trampling someone's balls while wearing stilettos. Reciprocity is a bitch that way.
I'll just hang out my own damn laundry.
And possibly yours too if you hit nice.
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Oh lawd @ all twuu dommies and subwissives that have to announce to the world that 'no one will evah break us up but we're poly. We has da one twue lurve. W/we won't fuck you or really provide you with much worth having but hey give us a shout. But if you think for one nanosecond that you'll evah come between our twuu lurve, think twice. My girl is loyalllllll and doesn't need your piddly cock because she has my M/masterful powerhouse rod of lurve.
Yawn. You're in lurve never to part. We all get it but does it need to be in CAPS LOCK?!
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Why is submission considered a "journey".
It smacks of cheap romance novels. Honestly get over yourselves already.
It's a preference. Nothing more.
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If you use slashy speak or capitalize your pronouns in the middle of sentences and expect me to do the same, please for the love of all things holy, pass me by.
It reeks of too much time reading about s/m and not enough time doing it (it's my perception rather than a statement of reality either way I hate that shit).
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Why why oh why doesn't cm have a gun play option?
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Oh. Dear. Lord.
So I'm perusing perverts profiles (alliteration ftw) of the domly kind and come across a comment on the following entry made by a submissive and since I simply could not resist commenting I stole the part he quoted and am quoting it here along with my thoughts.
on with the creep show:
~it has been taought proper respect this afternoon.it was told to remove
and eat one inner labia lip. when it was eating Miss asked it how it
tasted and it replied that it was gross. this disrespectful answer to
following Miss commands earned it the punishment of nailing its useless
udders to its desk. it has learned that anything Miss asks it to do can
never be thought of by the slave as gross if it is something that
pleases Her.it is sorry for its words and will never repeat such an
action~
Here I was sitting around thinking about what I could do on a cool cloudy day then I read this in someone's journal.
Light bulb on/light bulb off. Hey! I exclaimed to the empty room, I could eat
my inner labia (I'd add lip to but really it's redundant given labia is
a lip but I digress). I was going to read the novel I'd been rather
engrossed in but now I had new plans.
Labia it was.
The problem I faced was which one I'd choose. Since the original author quoted in the journal did not have the decency to report which "labia
lip" she ate, I was without direction. My "useless udders" trembled in
fear for they knew they could possibly be next.
It's hard to make the right decision when you have so many options and so few functioning braincells.
Given the lack of direction on this one, I decided to do a load of laundry and read.
Ah bdsm you're so full of liars and sickos that it's a wonder any of us ever actually get beaten.
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If you want me to do webcam shit play with you, I am not your chica.
Do not write me.
Got it? Good.
Sheesh.
I'm going to Ikea now.
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Today I broke a nail and got bit by a dog.
I'm wondering if I should try leaving my house once more.
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Today the thoughts rolling around in my head are like like an 80's soundtrack or some long forgotten Celine Dion record...and not the really great stuff from the 80's either.
How can one be expected to play WoW under such circumstances.
This is so not cool.
I'm torn between having a nap and taking an ativan.
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Well I'm rockin' out to DJ Champion and perusing CM and came across a lovely case of fakepicitude. Yup, chica with the fake pic got an email from moi.
Chicas, if yer gonna go a piccy stealin' don't steal porn images. You know porn images come from that big ol' industry with lots of folks looking at it daily- ah porn (light bulb on/light bulb off)- yeah that's the one.
Besides, it just makes you look dumber than you might actually be.
I took a break from WoW for this to damnit. Sheesh.
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News from the bastards at the weather network:
"At one point on Saturday night, Edmonton had the dubious distinction of being the
coldest place on Earth. The record low temperature of -46 degrees was
measured at the Edmonton International Airport."
That folks was *without* the windchill. Thankfully Siberia stepped up to the plate and dipped down to -48 and stole Edmonton's illustrious title.
Winter doesn't even officially begin until until Dec. 21.
Bah humbug.
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Sometimes it's good to revisit the entries of yestermonth.... my all time fave for your reading pleasure:
Best collarme profile line evah!
fake pigs liers men stop write me bullshit
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OMG stupidist fucking email evah!!! Well almost anyway.....
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
i'm looking to find the right man to further my sexual lifestyle,i love your profile and wish you could have me master...
i love to use toys & other objects in my pussy & ass to make myself cum.
I'm 24/7 submissive slave and read to give you all as my full master full time master...
I love to take part in gangbang and be used as a cum dump.
am
well trained in fisting,wax play,rape play,ana and oral sex,bondage,
and am ready to relocate with my master for my full service,,
i hope you could have me and i will never let you down...
YOurs,
Stupid spammer chick who wants a passport or money.....
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If you've tried CM, FL, Bcom or Alt, and still haven't found love or kink or even a piece of ass for that matter, try this:
http://www.adultsheepfinder.com
Rumor has it that these gals actually put out.
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New fave email line:
I like your profile write me I give you good sexy
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Say it with me:
Oh and for the record, D/s or M/s or S/m or whatever relationships are not more deep or meaningful than vanilla... they're different.
Got it?
Good.
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Hmmm, a new shiney green background was unexpectedly added to my journal by cm. I'm not so sure I like it all that much... and besides that's not what I was planning to write about anyway. Luckily it doesn't come up as green when I look at my profile.
Anyway, I put a fun pic up on my profile so you can all perve me (once it's approved that is) with visuals to add to the effect :)
Apparently folks are not allowed to be critical of other users in their journals. Hmmm. Well I'm still going to post inane emails and stupid comments regardless of policy. Sans names of course.
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w00t!
I just got gas for 92.4 cents a litre.
I so rock!!!
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*slaps you across the face*
That folks is my latest cm email... this is the only line there was....nothing else.
I think he did it deliberately to get on meara's all time greatest email list. So here you go dude, you've made the list.
Congratulations.
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Since I have nothing overly exciting to say these days, I thought I'd reach back to the annals (annal not anal you bunch of perverted buggers- pun intended) of meara's emails and entertain you with this gem from my alt inbox.
How fortunate I am to attract such men.
"So, I see you like hot plays indeed. I think you will be wonderful quite tied and chained in the most obscene positions, enjoying my hard cock
in your mouth, pussy and ass hole. Hm, I also think you maybe wish to
have both my hands inside you, yes? Or maybe you wish to be sitting
over a bottle with long neck, quite inside your ass hole, sucking my
cock, having your breasts well tied in my hands and your hands chained
on the buttocks. Do you like quite heavy chains on you, I mean hands
and feet quite locked, and a nice leather costume. You like collar and
gag ball too?..."
While I appreciate that most of us are here for sex and kink, a nice greeting prior to launching into your porn/kink fantasy wouldn't go amiss.
Even if the fantasy is mildly interesting.
And especially when the profile you're responding to mentions nothing related to your fantasy it's usually be a good idea to lead up to it rather than jumping right in.
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Today is so rockin'!
Yay me and my happy day.
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I just finished writing a rather brilliant and witty journal entry boasting of my possible car purchase as well as my new fancy skill in hooking up and unhooking a semi truck trailer. And then bam! post lost. I don't know how or why but it's gone and when I hit the back button in a frenzied attempt to retreive said post, all that was left was an empty box (text box you bunch of perverts) where my entry once was.
While I didn't break a nail while completing semi duty, I did get dirty. Not so dirty that I was tossing my lululemon pants in the trash at the end of it all but really... a bottle of Vim wouldn't go amiss if you're picking up what I'm laying down. Speaking of laying down... well that will have to wait for another day.
Back to my posting trauma. It was even colour coded: green for the car and pink for the truck section. You my dear readers have been ripped off by cm once more.
I know, I know.. this is almost as disappointing as going on a site like hornymatch.com only to realize that no one there actually wants to fuck.
Fear not, this too shall pass.
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Car shopping.
Yup folks I'm shopping for a new car...or a new second hand car or
pretty much anything with wheels and a couple of doors for that matter.
It sucka suckas
Mainly because car salesmen treat me like a suckah.
"But you are a suckah meara. We've heard all about you and your suckage". Ok, fine I'm a bit of a sucker, I admit it. But honestly, when I'm potentially dropping a fair chunk of change, is it too much to ask to be treated like I'm not a sucker? Like how about pretending I'm a guy (only a less hairy guy without a penis ok...)
I've had the condescending, exasperated "well what exactly did you *plan* to accomplish today meara" from a salesman who was irritated that I wasn't buying that mazda on the spot. Oh and let's not forget the "so what's important to you? Let me guess, colour?" Um well.... colour is kinda important but so is fuel efficiency and size and the overall mechanical soundness of said vehicle (though I did see a fabulous bubble gum pink Honda Element).
So moving on from car dealerships into 'sure it's been bag driven but it's a hell of a deal' land of private car sales has found me still without a car. I was driving along with da lovely Mizz Angie and saw a cute honda (great colour too btw) with some sort of sign attached to it. So after sliding over 3 lanes of traffic and trying to find our way on to the side road the car was on, we located my new dream car. It said "new driver".
I was crushed like a bug on the windshield of the rental I drove to Saskatoon.
Yet I hold out hope. Why you ask?
Because I intend to be the sworn enemy of all car salesmen (used and new alike). After I finally purchase a car, my name will be mud in the dealership circles and I may never get a car in this town again. But I don't care.
I just want a car or SUV or ....
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~to dance beneath the diamond sky with one hand waving free~
I had the most fantastic weekend.
The EFMF in one paragraph:
I danced in the rain and under lightening flashes to Michael Franti and the next day, grooved to Chris Isaak (who was wearing a bright pink suit). I mellowed out to the amazing Tom Russell and Jonny Lang blew my mind. I heard more amazing artists than I can name and enjoyed every single one. I hung out with great friends and family.
I fucking love my life.
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So I checked out this uber hot profile today.
Her name is meara and she's everything I'm looking for. I view her and she views me and I view her and so on. It's a never ending cycle with this woman.
So I emailed her and she didn't reply.
Now I think she's a faker bitch wannabe with an attitude.
hrumph. I'm going to make some cheese whiz toast because it always eases the pain of rejection.
...if I don't perve on me, then who is going to...
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Best collarme profile line evah!
fake pigs liers men stop write me bullshit
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Imagine my lack of suprise when I opened my email this morning and was greeted by this:
hello bitch...
Um.
Yeah.
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I've earned my song :)
I hopefully will receive said song soon. ("oh nice alliteration meara", yawned the crowd).
Along with the song, I also earned .95 cents. It was originally a dollar but someone expected change.
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So, there's this bad man in my world who knows a Tom Waits tune.
He played it for me a number of times. It is an amazing song.
He knows the title.
I do not.
(It's one of the few freakin' Tom Waits tunes I didn't know)
He has the song.
Now, he knows I love that song. That I've searched the internet high and low for it.
I could ask him for any song from his vast music collection and he'd oblige me.
Any song but this one.
He won't even tell me the name and he knows this is killing me.
I have to earn this song.
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For the record, I am looking for a dominant to whom I can submit.
My ad is not clear about this for good reason. If someone has taken the time to get as far as this little blog entry, they might have possibly read the entire thing and will know that 1) I am not a fem dom waiting to dominate you, 2) I am certainly not an twue uber submissive and 3) those wanting no limits slavery can pass me by.
I am also (and more importantly) looking for a lover, a boyfriend and a friend all wrapped up in one really great kinky package.
I want power exchange, rules and expectations but I want it with someone I respect for more than just his role in the lifestyle.
This confession had better not lead to a whole pile of kneel bitch yer my slave now emails.
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Some days I just want to be owned.
Not in the no-limits sort of way but in an emotional way. Where there are set expectations and rules and so on. So while there would be room for me to continue to express myself and be who I am, I'd be held up to exam by another whose word is law.
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~No Limits~
When I read profiles asking for slaves who are willing to give up all personal freedom and live as a true no limits slave, I think 'yeah right...good luck with that'.
Next time you find a no limits dude or gal, ask her if she's willing to kill her sister for her boyfriend... if so, then you've met Karla Homolka you idiot, not the slave of your dreams.
When these uber doms describe no limits subs/slaves, they often go on to describe a chick who will put out whenever she's asked. Um... There's a big ol' difference between willing to fuck and no limits.
So say it with me boys "I want a whore who will put out whenever my cock is hard".
I know, I know, I hear a Meatloaf tune coming on too....
And when I read profiles that say 'I have no limits' I just think...
Bullshit cause if I were to decide that the relationship would be totally vanilla I'm sure my no - limits slave would be movin' on.
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EdmontonSeeker had a good thought on the gift o'submission.
Why are subs giving the gift when the Dom/me can just take what he/she wants.
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I'm wondering what people think of pussy punching and kicking.
I personally think the whole damn thing is hot hot smokin' hot, particularly punching. Mind you, I don't want to be punched or booted across a
room or anything but a couple of nicely placed shots really flip my switch.
There's something about the whole wrongness of it all that really works for me. Not to mention the delicious owies the following day (or two).
~And that's the kind of day it's been at Chez meara~
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The remote issues are resolved and my gift of submission has been gladly traded away for this:
http://www.tigerdirect.ca/applications/SearchTools/item-details.asp?EdpNo=3109906&CatId=358 It was a deep and beautiful moment.
Thank you knight in shining armour.
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I've lost my tivo remote.
Now I'm in crisis.
I'll give my gift of submission to the first person who finds my remote.
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Lately I've seen a number of profiles that see submission as a "gift" that is given to the dominant.
Oh barf.
Not that this hasn't been an ongoing thing in the online dating bdsm world
forever. I just figured we were all beyond this, that's all.
My gift of submission (for what it's worth) comes with a return policy and a
waiver that says I get it back when you're through using it. And let me assure you, if you don't use my gift in a timely manner, I'm taking my gift back and going home.
So c'mon peeps be real.
Are there really subs out there who can say 'my submission is a gift'
with a straight face? Are there really dominants out there who can lay that
line on a gal while not thinking 'oh yeah, this is gonna get me laid'.
This phenomena appears to be far more popular in the fem sub/male dom set than with male subs/fem doms. I haven't really seen a whole lot of male subs
offering up their gift of submission.
It's pussy hawking actually.
You know the whole I'll give you my gift if you give me something in return
for the precious gift I've given you.
Generally a gift is given with no expectation of anything in return. Not so
with the gift of submission. In return we want to be dominated, played with and generally used (in service of course) by the dominant. Really, how long is the
average submissive going to stick around while the dominant just appreciates
her gift but gives nothing back (and I do mean absolutely nothing)?
I'd like to see a sub give her gift of submission to a man who doesn't do
anything with the gift in return. Then we'll see how long the dude gets to keep
that particular little gifty.
Not long, I can promise ya that.
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Recently I had a rather lovely discussion regarding gagging that had nothing to do with the traditional ball gag.
Thankfully.
Those I don't do. I have trouble enough breathing through my nose as it is, so ball gags don't really work for me.
But choking and gagging on a cock, now that works for me. I think this is because there's always a bit of respite from choking that allows a person to grab a good breath of air, not to mention the hotness factor.
There's something about snotting, drooling, coughing and gagging on a
cock that hits all of my kink buttons for humiliation. It feels so rude
and inconsiderate to be objectified in that way.
And sometimes rude and inconsiderate is the perfect way to spend an evening.
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I have really cute hair today :)
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I don't make any claims to be the grammarian of the kink set.
But honestly when Ur profle reeds lke this I'm not going to believe you when you say that you've had 20 years xprence in teh lifsyle and are really good with cains and flogers and feel free to right if you want to be owned by a true Mater.
Rather, I figure it's best if I head straight to the hospital. Cause if you beat the way you spell/write I'm confident I'll be there shortly after meeting you anyway.
I'm a busy gal and when the outcome is clear then why wait.
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In the words of American Idol judge Randy Jackson, "it was like smokin' hot molten lava baby!"
And I was "in the zone".
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Be clear or be hidden...
Thank you Magus_North for finding the hide button it's saved me from many an eye injury.
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I've noticed lately a number of profiles offering up some good ol' fashioned s/m but with no sex.
I get that personal risk for STD's increases exponentially with the number of sexual partners a person has and safer sex is only safer not safe. Though I don't get the appeal, I respect the position.
That said don't make yourself holier than thou by acting as though you're on some higher moral bdsm plain than the those of us who love raw hard satisfying sex as part of our s/m experience.
kthnx.
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Good spelling is sexy people!
So use your spell check with enthusiasm.
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Ok, so I'm learning the hard way about hitting the wrong button on this site.
But I've fixed that :)
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she stared at the clouds
moving slowly overhead
fuzzy like her mind
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I/i hate S/slasy S/speak!
I've read some good profiles today but had them ruined by the M/m Y/y W/w stuff.
Teh internetz sux.
I'm pretty confident that I'm still a bottom if I capitalize "I" in a sentence.
I would hope that people know their roles in kinkland without capitalizing Me in the middle of a sentence.
It's unnecessary and hideous to read.
Grrr.
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Recently I read in someone's blog about the 'hidden' button. This little gem let's you hide all the yucky gag me with a spoon profiles that have no business in your line of vision.
Because I had no real clue where this hide button was I had to suffer through the One True Master profiles who want you open and ready all of the time, will only ever call you bitch and believe your submission is a gift to be prized and treasured...no fakers and wannabes need apply.
Well no more. I too have found the hide button and I will use it with a wonton enthusiasm
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~~~Wonderin about the wannabe's~~~
I've seen a lot of profiles where wannabe's are not welcome. Apparently there are many wannabe's on this very site.
What the hell is a wannabe anyway? From what I've read, it's a submissive who doesn't want to completely give up her life to be with her one twue M/master so that she can be used in all holes 24/7 by him and all of his friends. Wannabe's have jobs and lives outside of kink.
Imagine that. How dare they.
Maybe the wannabe haters are the wannabe's themselves. If you keep attracting the same thing over and over again, perhaps it's time to look in the mirror.
Just because someone's kink doesn't match your own doesn't make them a 'wannabe'. It makes them a poor match.
Sheesh people, catch yourself on!
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It's late (or early) and I just figured out what GTA means...
Brilliant.
It only took weeding through an ungodly number of P/profiles F/for M/me T/to G/get T/there and it completely does not apply to me
Now if only I can find a colour I like, I'll post this.
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I'm groovin' on this colour... test test
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