8/31/2009 11:17:58 AM

Obedience - i can't say the word enough, or all it implies. Now, i'm a logical, thinking woman. But as a slave it's of no use when it comes to Master's commands. It makes no difference whether Master commands me to hop around on one foot while doing the dishes or take my car in to be serviced. It's not about what makes sense, it's about obedience.

8/13/2009 7:48:53 AM

There is a difference between devotion, caring and taking on responsibility for Master's feelings. It's been pointed out to me that i don't have to get stressed if Master is stressed and that i am of way better service to Him by maintaining an inner calm and strength. Even Dominates are human, after all. So i got to thinking about what i've learned about love. For years i interpreted love to mean feeling what the other feels - sharing in whatever they are experiencing. Yet, if one is suffering, what use is it to anyone if both are? Basically i'm a happy, contended slave. i find much peace and fulfillment in my slavery and am always learning more each day what it is to serve and love Him, accepting that He will feel all His feelings, He will encounter challenges, stess, frustrations as well as joy, peace and contentment. It's not my job to protect Him from Himself. It's my job to always be seeking ways to assist Him through whatever He's experiencing, not protect Him from His experiences. Today is another incredible journy through wonderland.

8/3/2009 10:19:48 AM

This week, this girl focuses on humility - meekness and deference to Master's Will and wishes. Also i am learning and practicing the Japanese tea ceremony, after finding everything needed. This weekend i am delighted to be able to perform this ceremony for Master.

7/22/2009 10:37:51 AM

Sometimes i just have to rant a bit about a pet peeve of mine - that being those who say and think there is no difference between a sub and a slave. Well, of course we're all entitled to our opinions. But i guess when someone refuses to accept reality and it's my reality, then i find myself feeling argumentative to say the least. Being a slave is not a choice i made. i didn't learn about this lifestyle and decide to be a slave. i am slave - period - and when i'm not owned i am still slave, the only difference is whether my needs are met or not. When owned my needs are met, i am permitted the luxury of begging or asking for what i need and desire. When unowned there is no one who has any idea how to meet my needs and so i am lost. As much as this may sound like fantasy to some, it is reality for me. It has been since i can remember and will continue to be until the end. So, thank you all for allowing me to rant a bit and if you don't agree - fine, but don't insist there is no such thing as a slave or that sub and slave are the same thing.

7/15/2009 8:42:53 AM

In reading the boards it seems there is alot of confusion about submission and bottoming. Many seem to think they are the same thing. Personally i don't. But i didn't come to the realization overnight either. i honestly think if one is submissive in their nature they won't find complete satisfaction in bottoming - meaning defining one's desires to the top and having them played out. i find submission to be an act of surrender to the Dominant - and my pleasure and fulfillment come from His happiness, not from having my own desires met. Sure i like having what i want - heh heh, but what i really want is what He wants and if that means not getting what i want, i'm actually just as happy.  i think this is  really different than trying to act submissive because one enjoys a particular kink or being controlled in a particular way for a specific amount of time.

7/13/2009 8:46:54 AM

We had a wonderful vacation together. It was interesting slaving in so many new places, being His no matter where we were or what we did.  One day we both drifted out of ourselves, back into the world's beliefs. i felt sadness, a sense of frustration that i didn't completely understand. But the solution was found in begging without words. i found myself kneeling at His bedside, expressing my submission, offering myself to Him. And we both found ourselves re-centered. So i learned that both Master and slave can drift and that we can each assist the other in re-centering. He will yank my leash when He sees me drift. When He drifts i feel afraid, a bit lost and find myself wanting to grab for control. But instead i've learned to submit more deeply, express my need of Him. It was a truly wonderful experience.

7/2/2009 8:59:48 AM

Today i'm very excited as i will be in Master's Presence tomorrow for 10 glorious days. my prayer is to be constantly pleasing and obedient and appreciate this wonderful gift. i'm an extremely lucky slave - Master's taking me to California to show me places He loves. i have such a keen interest in things He enjoys and loves. It's like being invited into a very special place, where His passions lay. i learn so much about Him in these ways. Thank You for owning me, Chairman.

7/1/2009 9:44:54 AM

Continue learning and growing more in my Master's pleasure. Been studying the book "SlaveCraft" which i'm finding extremely interesting and unusual in that its focus is on the psychology of slavery, rather than kink and play. Now, i love kink and play, but find that it takes a whole lot more than that to have a M/s relationship. i am seeking to grow deeper and deeper into my submission and surrender, as there is where my bliss is found.

6/24/2009 2:36:28 PM

i read posts on the boards about what to do when a sub/slave is not with their Dominant. Some pine and wish away their days, counting the minutes until they are once again wrapped in the whatever it is they want, that their Dominant supplies. For myself, i see everything i do as in service to my Master, whether it's doing my own laundry, mowing the grass, washing the floors, or laying over His knee. When not with Him physically, i read and learn, i practice things like Yoga, music, keep abreast of the news, learn more about the things that interest Him, so that my time with my Beloved is put to best use - being a worthy companion for Him as well as being His pleasure slave.

6/22/2009 10:00:59 AM

i know there are many who say there is no difference between a sub and a slave - and perhaps that is true. i can only speak for myself. There is a definite difference for me and that is this - as a slave, i make one decision - who i will obey - period. After that my attention is devoted to keeping my emotional, mental and physical states in top quality condition so my Master experiences pleasure and enjoyment from me as much as possible. i have no desire to create stress, or more work for Him. It's taken me a long time to get to this mindset. i don't believe it's an easy one to achieve. But once it is achieved, for anyone whose heart is that of a slave, it is heaven on earth.

6/18/2009 10:36:38 AM

Hmmm, sometimes i really wonder what some people are thinking when posting to the boards. No one is required to do anything other than what is chosen to do and to whom it's chosen to do it with. If anyone tries to convince another that this isn't so, that person is full of bull cockey.

6/16/2009 8:43:24 AM

i became aware recently that one of the mistakes i made as a slave is having alot of preconceived ideas about what that would look and feel like, based on things i've read online and in books. Without realizing it, i created roles for myself and my Master and was so busy trying to get both of us to fit those models, that it never occurred to me that that's not what M/s is about. Now, this is not to say that my way of viewing M/s is everyone's way. i'm simply sharing my own thoughts here. But i've learned that there is a difference between serving some ideology of D/s or M/s and serving my Master. Serving Him means letting go of my own pre-conceived ideas about how any of it is "supposed" to be and just being open, receptive, teachable and mostly obedient. For me it's taken a long time to have the willingness to be obedient. But i don't have the inner battle going on anymore and so am finally enjoying the bliss of submission.