The full moon the last couple of nights has inspired me... sadly I wasn't able to sit down and write my thoughts until tonight and I've forgotten 90 percent of what I thought up and the rest isn't as good as I first thought it up because I can't remember it all exactly. I guess this will be a work in progress.

Bright and full she shines tonight
And I gaze at her face enthralled.
Everything around me is lit with her glow
And the landscape takes on an eerie tone
All is indefinite, neither am I crowded in by pure black
Nor is anything distinct.
As I gaze up at this lovely spring moon 
I dream.
I hope.
I pray, 
That she, the one my heart beats out love for,
is looking up at that selfsame lunar light.
I pray.
I hope.
I dream, that every raging tremor of love 
I feel for her is reflected off this full moon and, 
Through her eyes, finds its way into her heart. 
For Romeo, Juliet was the sun and all others
The envious moon.
Alas, my love is like the moon.
Soft, pale and luminous, but
To me she gives no warmth.

Getting head while driving is truly a wonderful experience, but damn is it hard to focus on the road. During a road trip once I had the ex strip naked in the truck and lay so I could play with her pussy. I finger fucked her while driving and it was a hell of a hard time trying to focus on the road when all I wanted was to look at her cunt shining between her spread open legs. Being the kind of cock-sucking whore she was, she wasn't happy not keeping busy and finally I let her suck me while driving. I told her to put her mouth all the way down on my cock and keep it there, no moving her head. She could suck and run her tongue around all she wanted, but no coming up for air or to relieve the ache in her jaws. I drove this way for more than half an hour and the warm feeling of her mouth on my cock and her drool running down my balls was really great. Finally, we got close to our destination and I found a place to pull over and told her to suck me off. With a handful of her hair I facefucked her until my load blew in her mouth. I'd been mad at her earlier in the day and we'd had a fight. I guess my cum was mad at her too because she was choking, gagging and fighting to get free as my load filled her mouth. I pumped three or four good solid streams of cum into her mouth and like a good girl she swallowed them all, but she choked them down. When i let her up she begged for something to drink. I handed her my soda and she gulped it down. Finally able to speak she told me it was the worst tasting cum I'd ever shot into her. But like a good girl she didn't spill a drop. It was the first time in her life she liked the taste of a Dr. Pepper. 

Watching a woman orgasm from a rough anal fucking is just amazing. It happened once with the ex and it was a truly wonderful night. We'd gone to visit my parents and since we weren't married we weren't allowed to sleep in the same bed at my parents' place, but we were allowed a room in the guest house together. My brother and a few of his friends had taken up residence in the other bedroom (separated from our room by an adjoining bathroom) and were playing video games all night. That night the wife and I both were feeling frisky, so I thought we'd try a little rape fantasy. She put on a t-shirt and panties and got into bed, I told her she had to pretend to be young. She'd had this fantasy since she was young that she'd told me about. It was about a strange man that lived across from her growing up and she used to fantasize about him coming into her room at night and raping her. She was 10 when she first had this fantasy... I guess I had a keeper sure enough. So I slipped out into the livingroom and waited a bit and then crept back into the bedroom. In the livingroom I'd found this toy knife in a box of junk my parents had stored in there. It looked real, but was plastic. The blade was pretty hard and sharp enough to feel real, so I took it with me. As I crept in the ex rolled over to look at me and I sprang on her, slamming a hand over her mouth and pushing the knife to her throat. It was evident in her eyes she hadn't expected the knife and her eyes widened in fear. I didn't give her time for any questions and I didn't explain. I went right into the fantasy. I rolled her over face down and told her not to scream or I'd kill her and her family. I kept a hand to her mouth and told her not to look at me. I told her I'd been watching her for a long time and just knew she needed to fuck. I could see it on her face every time I saw her and I couldn't wait any longer. I was going to give her the fucking she needed.

"Now this is going to hurt. I'm not going to fuck you in the pussy," I said. "You're still a virgin and I don't want anyone finding out. So I'm going to fuck you in the butt. Have you ever had sex in the butt before?"
She wiggled her head in the "no."

"Good. I want to be the first man in your tight ass. It is o.k. to cry, but you have to keep quiet. If anyone hears you I'll kill you and your parents. Do you understand?"

She nodded, my hand still pressed hard over her mouth and the knife to her throat. The best part was she did have to stay quiet because of the people just a room over. I moved the knife away and set it aside and pulled her panties down and my shorts down and pushed my cock into her tight ass. She moaned into my hand, fighting my cock probing her ass. 

"Shhh. you have to be quiet," I growled into her ear, simultaneously jerking her head back with my hand. 

Once I had my cock firmly in her ass I took my other hand and pushed her face down into the mattress. One hand holding her mouth hard pulling back and one pushing forward, she fought for air and screamed a little as I fucked her ass, first slow, then fast, but the sound was so muffled I doubt anyone even standing in the room could have heard her. 

I breathed into her ear the whole time. 

"That's a good girl. Oh, you were made for fucking. I knew it the moment I saw you walking to school. You're tight ass was made for having a cock in it. I bet your pussy is too. I can't wait to try it. I'm going to come back every night and fuck you. Do you understand? (she didn't even nod an answer) You're mine now and I'm going to fuck you so hard you're gonna cry."

Clearly I was, because I could feel either snot or tears running over the hand I had pressed over her mouth. 

After a few minutes I was getting close to orgasm when suddenly I felt her body start shaking in a way it hadn't up to that point. She lay under me having what was almost a seizure and I let her head up for some air, but kept one hand firm on her mouth. She shook, moaned and shook some more. Finally, I exploded me load in her add and lay on top of her puffing winded.

"You be a good girl and don't make a sound and I'll take my hand off your mouth. Do you understand?"

She nodded slightly.

I removed my hand but kept on top of her, pumping occasionally into her ass as my waning hard-on faded. 

Finally, figuring the fantasy was over I asked "Are you ok?"

"Yes I came. It was huge," she finally whispered in a quivering voice.

"Really? You came?"

"Yes."

"You came with me fucking you in the ass?"

She was quiet for about a minute and finally said, "You were fucking my ass?"

"Yes," I almost yelled. 

"Wow. I guess I didn't even realize it. It was so good." 

Somehow she'd gotten so caught up in the fantasy her mind had just gone blank. She'd just laid there, under a man fucking her in the ass and accepted it as her place and everything else had gone from her mind except the feeling of being fucked and she'd orgasmed. 

It was the only time she ever came from an ass fucking. It was the only time we ever lived out that fantasy of hers. I wish now we'd have done it more. 

If you've read my two previous journal entries you may think I'm some kind of a beast that doesn't care about how the other in the relationship feels or what they want. Let me shed a little light on a few things I mean when I say "princess by day, slut by night."

My ex and I had gone to the movie store to rent a few movies (she was my g/f then). This was shortly after the film "Varsity Blues" came out and the ex was in love with James Van Der Beek and watched "Dawson's Creek" like it was a religion. We'd walked into the store and along one wall was a large stand-up cardboard cutout promoting the film with JVDB larger than life. The ex stared at it in longing for a few seconds and then almost casually said, "I wish I had that." I told her to go pick a few movies and I was going to go check on something. I caught an employee, asked for the manager and when he came by I asked him if he'd sell the cutout to me. He wasn't sure, they'd never been asked before. He did some checking, named a price and I gladly paid it. By now the ex had finished checking out a couple films and was eying me with a look of "Why aren't you coming?" I said; "Just a minute, I'm getting something." A few seconds later the manager walked over carrying the cutout and handed it to me. I turned to the ex and said, "Here you go." Tears were standing in her eyes and she had a look of pure awe on her face. James Van Der Beek watched her do things in her bedroom I wasn't there for, and I'm a bit jealous, and perhaps a bit happy, because she did cheat on me repeatedly.

Some years later we'd become engaged and we were visiting my folks. We'd swung by Walmart and headed into the materials/arts and crafts section where mom was buying some clothe. On a shelf display they had a Garfield and Odie housecoat/robe, made of fleece. The ex wanted it bad, but of course it wasn't for sale. It was a display piece. You bought the pattern and material and made it yourself. Later I went back and bought the materials, went home and learned to sew and made her the house coat. She was with her parents in Australia at Christmas so I mailed her the housecoat. Christmas day came and I called her up to ask if she'd gotten it. She said she did (it fit perfectly by the way) and I asked her what her family thought of it. She said "I didn't show them." "Why," I asked. "I didn't want to ... it wasn't perfect." Now my sewing may not have been factory quality, but you had to look pretty hard to see it wasn't perfect. Imagine how I felt that day.

Fast forward again a few more years later. I'd planned to ask her to marry me and spent weeks looking for a ring. I was in college and money was scarce, but I wanted to do it right. No ring seemed perfect. Finally, I was walking through the mall and came to a jewelry store that was going out of business. In the case they had a ring I knew was perfect the minute I saw it. 12 small diamonds on a simple gold band. The price was still a lot for me, around $1,400, even on sale more than 60 percent, but I scrounged up the money and bought it. Took it to a jeweler and had it resized (I guessed her size perfectly), and stashed it for later. It was just before Christmas again and I had called her asking what she wanted for Xmas. She was in Australia. (We'd met online.) She said "A ring." I was immediately freaking out. I'd only told a handful of people about the ring and wondered who could have told her. "What kind of ring?" "Oh, a diamond ring?" "Yeah? How many diamonds?" "Like 12 diamonds." I was furious. Someone had told her and spoiled the surprise. I hung up with her and went apeshit on everyone I'd told about the ring and my plan. No one had told her about it. Three months later when we were together I proposed and when I did she was stunned. I wasn't sure she was going to say yes, not or go to hell, because she just stood there stunned, looking at the ring. Finally, she said "Yes." I asked her if she knew about it, she said  she didn't. I said I had thought she had because she'd described the ring perfectly just months earlier. She didn't remember even telling me about the ring... somehow I'd picked out the perfect ring, the exact ring she wanted, a month before she told me about it. All I can attribute that to is love. When you love someone you dive into their souls and become connected to them and through time and space that connection sends you messages. Why do I think this? Because the first time she cheated on me I knew it before she ever told me. I confronted her with it and scared her to death when I described the man, the place and everything that happened when she'd cheated as if I'd been there. I was connected to her deeply and as rough and wild as the sex we had was, I loved her deeper than anyone I've ever known and I poured my entire being into her and swam in the eddies of her soul.

She had pissed me off again. She could be such a bitch when she put her mind to it and I think she did it on purpose, because she seemed to like what came out of it as much as I did. She'd get me so mad I had to find a release and fucking her rough was the perfect way to get it. She liked the abuse and I didn't realize how much until much later. Had I known I'd have given her all she wanted and more, but it didn't fully dawn on me until she'd found someone else who gave her what she needed. I remember the first time I began to realize how much she needed to be degraded and fucked hard, abused and used. As I said she'd pissed me off again and then somehow turned it around and I was dragging her to the bedroom pissed. Before I knew what I was doing I was ripping her clothes off and I'd shoved her face first down onto the bed and straddled her from behind. I had a fist full of her hair and I was pushing her face into the mattress as I rubbed my cock up and down the crack of her ass. "I'm gonna fuck you so hard," I said. "Do you know why I like fucking you in the ass?" Her answer stunned me. In a voice that clearly said she liked it, no matter how often she said she didn't, she said, "Because it hurts me." I was almost too stunned for words. "Yes," I finally said. "Yes. Because it hurts you and I want to hear you cry." I pushed my dry cock hard into her ass. She had the tiniest rectum and it took everything to get inside her when she clenched and still not break my dick in the process. I finally found a little breach and pushed in. It was too much even for me. I pulled out, spit on my fingers and rubbed it over the head of my cock and tried again. It was enough to get me in, but not enough to make it easy. She screamed and began moaning and crying immediately. Her tears were soaking the bed spread as I furiously fucked her tight ass, putting all my weight behind every thrust and not caring at that point if it did any permanent damage or not. Secretly, in the darks of my soul I knew I loved fucking her ass for another reason. She was insatiable and no amount of fucking, fingering and sucking of her cunt was ever enough, but my cock in her ass, any was too much. She didn't beg for more, she cried and begged me to stop. Ah the strange dichotomy of a girl with daddy issues who likes pain in the depths of her soul even as she screams out against it on the outside. Oh and how I must have some issues of my own, because the louder she cried, the more tears I saw, the more I loved it. The more I wanted to hurt her and make her cry. The more joy it brought me knowing that here, finally here was something I could do to show her who the master really is, that I had laid claim to her, she was mine and mine alone and no one else could have her. Here was where I showed her what it meant that she was mine. Here was where I took what was mine by right of her submission even though she spent every waking moment finding ways to try and break me. Here I broke her and I loved every minute of it. Her dry, tight ass gripped my cock like a vise and it was too soon when a hot load shot up from my balls into her ass, filling her and draining me. It was one of those orgasms men talk about where they feel it all the way down to their toes and it feels like everything inside them is trying to force its way out through their cock. I came hard. I shuddered and I didn't want to stop. I wanted to hear her moan and cry forever. I wanted to feel my cock inside her tight ass forever. I wanted her there, beneath me, unable to think of anything but the pain and who was giving it to her, of the shame she secretly felt but lived for with my cock buried in her ass. I jerked her head back by the hair and slapped her face, something I'd never done before. Something that a deep part of me screamed out against doing, but I couldn't stop myself now. I slapped her face again. "This is what you want?" I screamed at her. "This is what you push me to. I don't want this." Even though I knew in my heart I did. I needed to dominate her. I needed to do everything I could to break her instead of let her break me, because only then would I be able to keep her. She'd strayed once already I knew and I'd forgiven, but not forgotten. The hate and rage welled up inside me again and I should have been spent but somewhere in that white-hot rage I found another wind. My cock hardened again, even harder than before it seemed and I fucked her until I collapsed on top of her out of breath, aching for another release, another orgasm, wanting to fuck her ass until the end of days but too tired to do so. My cock screamed for another release, but I didn't have the energy to give it. She lay beneath me sobbing. It felt right. Damn me but it felt right, more right than anything had ever and I never wanted it to end. I rolled off of her onto my back and pulled her around by the hair forcing her face in front of my cock. "I need to cum again. Fucking suck it, bitch." I demanded. "Fucking suck it hard like the whore you are." She hated to be called whore. Probably because she knew it was true. She'd cheated. What else do you call that? But she wanted it as much as me and she opened her mouth and I forced my cock into her throat as far as it would go. I am not long by any measure, but she could never deep throat me. Her mouth was too small. She could barely open her mouth far enough to admit my 4.5-inch diameter cock. Not big, but for a tiny filipina at 5-feet and 87 pounds, it was enough. I grabbed her hair in both hands and literally face-fucked her mouth. I'd face-fucked her before, but never like this. Again the rage was there and I was rough. Rougher than i know I should have been and so rough I'm still ashamed I did it. I was supposed to be in love with this woman. I was supposed to love her. How could I say that now? But heaven forgive me I knew this was the greatest love I'd ever felt before and doing this with her felt right. We felt connected and I began to think that despite what I thought about this entire scenario, she was loving it in the bottom of her soul. She didn't fight it. She went with it. She didn't say "no" even once. As hard as I'd just fucked her ass, as much as she'd cried and sobbed, she hadn't said "no" and hadn't asked me to stop. I face-fucked her until the grating of her teeth over my cock was too uncomfortable to do more. I hadn't cum again and I still ached for it. I needed another release. I pulled her head off my cock. "Jerk me off, cunt." I demanded. "You can't make me cum with your mouth." She obediently wrapped a hand around my cock and began pumping. "Harder!" I demanded. "Grip it harder." "God dammit you better make me cum again or so help me God I'm going to fuck you up," I screamed it at her in a voice that had never been my own and shocked me as much as it must have shocked her. The look on her face for the first time showed fear. "Suck it and jerk it," I said, forcing her mouth over my cock and once again face-fucking her through her tiny hand wrapped around my shaft. That finally did the trick. I could feel the orgasm building for what seemed hours and it seems constantly on the verge of slipping away. Just when I thought I'd peak it seemed her mouth missed the right spot and I was going to lose it. It took no more than two or three minutes, but it might as well have been a decade for the second climax to come and my cock dry-heaved into her mouth. I had indeed spent my load the first time, what came this time was the watery semen that the body seems to excrete just so something will come out. As I came I shoved her head down on my cock as far as I could, held it there hard and rocked my hips into her mouth, screaming like a dying soldier on a battlefield. When it finally came to an end the ache to come again was still there, but I couldn't do more. I was drenched in sweat from head to foot and so was she. Her hair was matted from the sweat and her body was sticky to the touch. I pulled her up beside me and wrapped an arm around her, slapping her ass once quite hard for good measure. We lay there for a long time not talking. She was still crying and I didn't care.. or at least a part of me didn't. A part of me found the sound to be a sweet music. Finally after a time her hand found my cock and began caressing it... she was insatiable. "You hit me," she said, her voice full of fear and accusation. "I'm sorry," I said, and deep down I meant it. She was quiet for a long time. "I'm afraid one day you're going to hit me and hurt me," she said. "I'm afraid you're going to ... " Kill me. I knew the words she meant but never spoke. "I'm sorry," I said. "I shouldn't have hit you. You know I would never hurt you like that. I love you too much." "But what if you do?" "I won't." "But you could. You're so much bigger than me." I don't know where she was going with this. I'd never struck her in the face before and I'd hardly even spanked her ass hard enough to leave a red mark. She was delicate and I was terrified of hurting her, but somewhere, somehow I'd lost my grip on that fear this night and gone too far, I knew. There was no coming back from this. I very well could be an abusive SOB and do something awful to her... and yet, she seemed to enjoy the thrill of that fear, thrived off the terror that I could kill her, even though I think we both knew that was a shadow, I was a teddybear and she ran roughshod over me every day, making me miserable and physically ill with her abusive words and actions. My family hated her. My friends hated her. The few women who wanted me hated her and not because she was with me, but because they saw how miserable she made me and they told me they hated her. Every single one of them, and yet I let her push me into being someone I didn't want to be, to doing something that a part of the very core of me screamed out against, and yet.... and yet another part of me had never felt so alive as that night. I'd never felt more in control of anything in my life and I'd never felt as free and as at peace with myself and the world than in that moment with her. I think of all the times we spent together, of all the sex and sexual acts, that was the night we connected most as two souls, as two people. My love for her deepened that night and for a time I think she thought she'd finally found what she needed. I wanted to be that for her, a part of me wants to be that same man again and with her in that moment more than anything in the world. It wasn't enough. For all her talk of fear there never really was any real threat of my doing the things she said she was afraid I would do, and she came to realize it and sought out another where those fears were truly founded, where abuse and the threat of death were not only possible, but probable, and she went to him and left me. In the end, I let her abuse me, change me, make me into someone else and I loved her for it and craved more. Perhaps that is why so many women in abusive relationships stay, they come to need and crave it like a drug. I did. I needed to be pushed to the point of breaking and do awful things to her, because it made me feel alive, in control and let me release all the hate I'd built up for her for all the horrible things she did to me in a way that I've yet to find the words to explain all these years later. 

 What I now fear most is that this inner demon needs let out and that a part of me will even want it out. That I may even need to let it out and that this will cause me to miss out on something truly wonderful with an amazing woman. I fear I am broken and that there is no one left in this world for me, because of my dark dichotomy. 

The other day I was driving home and my thoughts ended up wandering back to days with my ex-wife. It wasn't long until I was thinking about one of the most incredible sexual experiences I ever had with her. We had a lot of fun and did some pretty wild stuff, but something about this one experience always sticks out in my mind. I'd come home from work and was feeling frisky so I headed to the shower and had her join me. We played around a bit and then got out and dried each other off. I wanted to taste her really badly but I had other things on my mind as well so I told her to wait for me in the bedroom and I'd be there in a minute. I went through the house and turned all the lights off, stumbled into the bedroom and opened up the blinds that were at the head of our bed. There was an almost full moon and a street lamp down the way lit up the room in a soft glow. I laid her on the edge of the bed, got down on my knees and spent at least an hour eating her out. She came I don't know how many times, but her thighs gripping the sides of my head while she moaned and writhed was always enjoyable and it would get to the point she'd try to push me away, but I'd grab her hips tight with both hands and push my face in harder so her lovely clit couldn't escape me. I never tired of going down on her, it was so much pleasure as to be intoxicating. Finally, however, it was time for my pleasure and i picked her up, rolled her onto her stomach and stuffed a few pillows under her hips. She was in the middle of the bed with her head to the headboard and I straddled her hips and worked my cock inside her pussy. It was dripping wet and it took only a few strokes to lube me up good. She didn't much care for anal, but she was always willing to please me and this night I wanted her ass. When I pulled out of her pussy she knew what was coming and turned her head to look at me, asking "My ass?" I said "Yes. Now take it like a good girl." I slowly worked the head of my cock into her asshole. She was always so tight it took a bit of work to get inside her, but it was always worth the effort. After I had my head inside her I just left it there for a few moments, enjoying how tightly her hole squeezed the head of my cock. She never could seem to relax her ass when I was fucking it. Finally I slowly pushed my cock into her as deep as I could and she let out a loud moan. I braced myself with my hands on the headboard and began what would be at least another hour inside of her. I would push slowly inside of her as deep as I could, hold it a second and then pull slowly out until just the head of my cock was still inside her. I kept up a slow pace going in and out of her for a long time. I lost all track of time. Finally, after what to her must have been hours, she asked, "Honey, are you almost done?" I wasn't even close. I wanted to savor this time and frankly would have loved it to go on forever. "No. I'm having fun. Just shut up and take it like a good girl," I told her. As reinforcement I pushed my cock deep into her and then put all my weight into pushing it deep into her bowels. She moaned even louder, finally turning her face into the pillow to stifle an almost scream and clenching the pillow in her fists. Back to my slow in and out I went. I'm not sure I have the words to describe it. The feel of her ass around my cock, the sound of her moans, the way the soft moonlight beamed in the window and fell across her back.. it was one of the most enjoyable times we had sex. There were other times, wilder times, where we went at it like rabbits, where we roleplayed and I forced her on her stomach and fucked her ass so hard and fast she orgasmed from it and even forgot it was anal sex, surprised when she came screaming like a banshee (my hand over her mouth to keep the neighbors from hearing) that it had been my cock in her ass that had done it. Those were great times, but this night, her moans where like music and the light made the image of her lying there just beautiful. I'll never forget how lovely her back looked bathed in moonlight and how it cast a shadow at the upper crack of her tiny, sexy butt. I kept on going into her slowly for a long time after she asked if I was almost done and it was so slow that I could feel my climax coming for several minutes, finally unable to hold it back I push deep into her and shot one of the biggest loads I'd ever had into her. It was frankly amazing when I thought about it later, but at the time I was too into it to realize I came for 30-45 seconds. When it finally stopped I just stayed there with my head resting on my arms at the top of the headboard. I didn't want to pull out of her. It felt so wonderful. Her moaning finally subsided and as I began to soften I could feel the cum gushing out around my cock. Her ass was so tight cum would never stay in it. I put a few kleenex under my cock and pulled out, the cum practically shooting out of her ass. I rolled over next to her and laid there stroking her back for several minutes before she got up holding the kleenex and went to the bathroom to let the cum drain out of her into the toilet. A few minutes later she came back and laid down next to me with her head on my shoulder. We just laid there in the dark for a long time just breathing, eventually she ran her hand down to my groin and began caressing my balls and cock. It wasn't long until I was hard again. What happened next blew my mind. We'd talked about ATM after watching pornos, but we'd never done it. She always said she might and I said I'd probably like it but never ask her to do it. She was insatiable in bed and I guess she knew what she wanted and wasn't going to let that get in her way. She suddenly slid down and began licking and sucking my cock. I'm uncircumsized and she first licked and sucked it clean with the foreskin over the head and then pulled it back and sucked the rest of my cock clean. She went down on me for about 10 minutes before getting up and easing her pussy down over my cock and began pumping me, at first slow, but hard. I reached out and we interlocked our fingers and she started fucking me harder after a few minutes. I could tell she was getting near another orgasm and she pushed her pelvic bone so hard into me it actually hurt, but I wasn't going to stop her. It felt amazing as she ground my cock hard. Soon she began to shake and I knew she was starting to orgasm. I was close to cumming too and didn't want to cum too soon, so I focused all my energy on not cumming. After a minute or so it was all I could take and just as I started to cum (I didn't expect to be able to shoot another load so soon, but I did) so did she. We came together moaning and her fingers, tiny as they were, nearly broke mine as she climaxed. She fell on top of me panting and we lay there, me holding her and smelling her hair. It wasn't long before I fell asleep. How long I was out I don't know, but probably not long since she was always so cold-natured. I awoke to her sliding off of me and pulling the blankets up around us. I could feel the want in my cock. I wanted to fuck her again, but I was exhausted. I finally found the energy to roll her onto her side, spooned her and run my hand down to her pussy. I worked my middle finger inside her and her cunt was soaked with my cum, and I began rubbing her g-spot. It didn't take long until she was rocking her hips into my hand and squeezing it between her thighs. I thought she was going to break it when she came again and squeezed me so tight she had bruises on her inner thighs the next day. After she came I held her and we fell asleep. 

If I could relive just one night of the time we had together, that would be it. But this time I'd get a power bar or energy drink or something and keep fucking her. I never wanted to stop.

Well I just created an account. Let's see how this goes.