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Friends:
rhetaxdressingdonna

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What do we put in these profiles? Something about ourselves, our interests (both lifestyle and nilla), limits, and what we want and/or don't want in a partner and relationship. But the little bit we put here is such a long way from the total person and their goals. It would be sad if someone could write a few words to sum themselves up. People are more complex and changing (at least I hope we are) than what we could put in a few paragraphs. The couple things that I can put so we don't waste our time is that I do not do online anything nor am interested in long distance. So if you live close drop me a note.

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5/11/2014 3:15:20 PM

Well, the semester is over. Now it is up to the teachers. I did the best I could, but I don't think it was enough. Still trying to find a job. Hope everyone is having a good year.


7/28/2013 12:30:52 PM

Well has been awhile, I graduated this year with an ASS in Office Administration with a Medical Concentration. Haven't gotten a job yet, so it is back to school I go. With only fifteen classes I can get two ASS degrees in computer and three computer certifications. Hoping this will make me more employable. Other than this, nothing changes. Later,


12/20/2010 6:05:53 AM

Well, another term over and I have my certificate so I can get a job. School is getting easier at least. Not sure if it is because my brain finally started working or if the classes are just easy. Either way, at least it is not as hard to do right now. I am going to keep doing classes to get my ASS in Office Administration with a Medical and Computer Concentration, but most of the classes with have to be on line and not in class. There are a few that I will have to do in class toward the end, but this next term I am doing four on line classes. If there is anyone out there over 50 that is thinking of going to school, take it easy. Do one or two classes, if I didn't have to rush to get that certificate I would probably have enjoyed school more. Doing six and seven classes, a term is crazy. However, I did it and got A's and B's; not sure how but hey, what can I say.


6/7/2010 7:33:52 PM
School, do not suggest anyone over the age of 50 try doing it for the first time. Eventhough I did 7 classes and ended up with 5 A's and 2 B's I don't suggest anyone over the age of 55 try to go to school. A whole new place and a whole new set of problems. If my job wasn't ending in Nov. I wouldn't have gone that is for sure.

1/1/2010 6:59:50 PM
I hope everyone will have a good New Year. Sitting here drinking the last of the champagne from last night, I can't help but wonder what is in store for us this next year. With me starting college I know it will be a new adventure for me. Hope that everyone has some kind of an adventure too. Later. Be safe and well,

11/16/2009 1:22:49 PM
It is interesting how Doms want real, yet put out an unrealistic view of life with them. Do they read what they wrote? With the grammar and spelling errors I think it is evident that they don't care to read what they wrote nor how it misrepresents what they wanted to convey. Communication is key to any relationship, if you can't properly communicate what you mean in your profile, then what is life going to be like with you? Anyway, I would like to take a look at some of these unrealistic views of their slaves life.
The slave will never have to think for themselves. OK, lets look at slaves. They are given a task, told basically what is expected the outcome should be, and then told to do it. Even if the Dom has completely deminstrated the task, the slave will have to think while doing the task so that they do it with the end result the Dom wanted. Even slaves in the South had to think for themselves. The Master wasn't around all the time to solve problems that would arise and a slave didn't travel miles to go ask the Master to solve the problem. Most of the time there was a head slave, this slave would make sure others kept working, solved problems, and trained new slaves. This all takes brains and thinking. So it isn't realistic to say a slave will never have to think again. Besides we are humans and humans need to keep thinking to keep themselves viable.

10/26/2009 3:47:34 PM
Another year. Not much has changed. Only one thing happening to take up my time, I am going to go to college. All you out there with kids and getting these grants, I take my hat off to you. The only thing they haven't ask me to do is give blood LOL. Better not say that too loud, that might be next LOL. Anyway, keep up the good fight. Later. Be safe and well, have fun,
chris

10/31/2008 8:23:32 AM
Another year gone by, my where does the time fly. Updated my age. Have been writing to the Doms that have been viewing my profile without much luck. If they are taking the time to read, why not take the time to talk? Anyway, those that have answered have become new friends and hope to help them with their search. And life goes on. Later.

11/13/2007 1:50:15 PM

Well, I updated my profile again. See if this gets anyone thinking. Later. Be safe and well,


10/2/2007 10:47:48 AM
Seems that it has been awhile sense my last entry. Guess life keeps us busy. Not much has changed for me in the past few months. I now belong to one of the local BDSM clubs so that I at least can be with my friends more often. Haven't found anyone. Very few have contacted me. Like in my last journal entry those contacts where the same (2 or 3 emails and poof, gone). It is coming up on winter and looks like the same as past years. Hope some of you got lucky over the summer. Later. Be safe and well, have fun,

6/2/2007 8:42:31 AM

A few of you have written me about my use of words in my last entry. OK, give a word other than garbage that means unwanted, disposable when done, tossed to the side with no respect, object. Don't think that you will find one.

The only other thing I have to say is those that contacted me clearly started every e-mail with "I am not available," or "I am not interested in you," or "we could be pin pals." Then I write back, as positively as I could muster up, just so that after 2 or 3 e-mails you drop me like a piece of garbage the Doms in life are doing. So what was your point? Make me feel worse about myself? Reinforce my belief that there isn't anyone out here for me. Well you did.
 
Actions speak louder than words. I see no action. Just more people putting out the garbage.


5/10/2007 6:01:45 AM
Arm candy wins again. 6 months of "I am not looking anymore." "Your fun and easy to talk to." "I like being with you." "Your a good friend." Then arm candy shows up and boom I get an off line message (not even a face to face) that says "I found someone else." We can stay friends. Like 'she' is going to let that happen. No one wants a fat, average looking piece of garbage like me. Why do I let myself go through this? I need to stop hoping there is someone out here for me. Deep inside I know that there isn't, but I hope when someone starts being with me and we start getting to know each other. Then Dom's wonder why it is so hard to talk to us. While I know there are women that do this to you guys too. Most of the time you don't let your heart get involved so that it doesn't get broke over and over and over and ... Well you get the picture. Don't know how to do this without having feelings for the other person. Without the feelings I can't trust. Without trust what is the point?

1/9/2007 9:20:33 AM
Well, I have finally edited my profile so that it isn't so harsh. I have come to the conclusion that the only service that I seem to be wanted for is to help new people and be part of toy bags. I have been doing this for the past 5 years anyway. I have been in conversations with people that think that this service should be just as fulfilling as being with someone and that I should be happy. They don't know s--t. Being alone is being alone. This is a lonely and hollow service. While I do have moments of usefulness, there is no one to share them with and no outcome or bonding. No one to take pride that I did something well. Then in the end have to deal with the physical problems and mental let down alone. In the off chance that someone would be interested in an old, fat, and common looking sub/slave, I left my needs and desires in my profile.

11/16/2006 10:22:02 AM
Well, there are more and more Doms finally admitting that they want the young arm candy subs. Subs that worry more about looks than serving. That is a sad statement to make in our lifestyle when acceptance, tolerance, respect, honor, and service is our motto. While I respect that is what they want and will fight for their right to have it out of my dedication to acceptance and tolerance of our differences. To me they have no honor because they don't care about the service that they receive, only about appearances. You have to look good to serve. ONLY the fit can serve. Well guess they only need a person that will get their soda and food while doing a cart wheel as they watch the games on TV. Forget about the internal needs that service also tends to satisfy. Guess the nilla views on "what is pretty and you have to have the good looks to be loved" had to effect this lifestyle sooner or later. Superficial minds are not tolerant nor accepting no matter what they say.

7/13/2006 8:23:32 PM
You know, it takes more than 2 e-mails to talk. So many just stop, no 'f--- you', no 'hey I changed my mind', no anything. They just stop. If you want trust and respect, then you need to communicate.

6/24/2006 3:15:55 PM
Well this is a new one, "you seem to be in all this weird religious stuff." Where does it say that I am into any kind of religion? I like to be informed!!!  Those that say any religion is "weird" might want to read a little and find out before they judge anything. It is this kind of ignorance that keeps prejudices going. Maybe it is just as well that I can't find anyone if this is what is out here.

5/16/2006 2:46:49 PM
OK, going to try this again. I know that my profile looks harsh. Right now I just can't soften it because of how hurt I am. So please know that I am not some bi--h that isn't a sub at all. I have plenty of references that would be glad to let you know how and who I am. Please just read it and know that I still believe that there are some nice Doms out there. I know they will be able to see between the harshness of my profile and help me back. Just my finding someone seems to be a fantasy at this point. Well, hope that if I sound interesting you will at least talk to me. Later. Be safe and well, have fun,

1/2/2006 10:02:38 AM

So many have in their profiles about sex. SEX 24/7, SEX any way and every way, SEX this, SEX that, SEX - SEX - SEX !!!!! DO THEY LIVE ON PLANT EARTH ???? Like that is all BDSM is about. What about the 2/3 of your life that is spent living, making a living, and doing what you need to live. HELLO !!!!! Saw in one profile how he had a slave chained to a wall 24/7. Excuse me !!!! That is not a life, that is a convict and abuse. Humans are social animals. Humans need fresh air, sunlight, interaction, and so on. If I was one of the people reviewing the profiles for content, believe me these guys would have the cops banging on their doors. There are too many sub/slaves out here that will agree to this type of behavior because the moron that does this convinced them that this is the way it is supposed to be if you want to be a slave. This is NOT a Dom - this is an ABUSER that is trying to hide in our midst as a Dom. SLAVES ARE NOT DOORMATS !!!! Slaves are smart, strong, vital human beings willing to be with a Dom because He appreciates these qualities. This is why I require the Dom to be in or willing to join the BDSM/leather community. There is NOT a single reason in the world why they can't go to at least munches/sloshes and have friends that are like minded.


12/27/2005 3:04:05 PM
I have gotten so many posts of encouragement. Want to thank you all. Hope that we can stay in touch. Someone asked me "Did I learn anything from this?" My first reaction is that my heart is too easy and need to use my brain more. To some extent that is true. After looking for 4 years and using my brain it was time for the heart to jump out there at some point and take over. But I think I learned that no matter what you ask, investigate, or think about a person, in the end they are themselves and it will come out in time. TIME !!!! The one thing that we all seem to not take. We want to hurry. Find someone, get collared, and walk off into the sunset. TIME !!!! The little four letter word that we give lots of lip service to, but don't take to heart. One of the four letter words that we lump with the others that we don't want to say (snow, work, f--k, s--t, etc.) or know is out there. But TIME will bite you if you don't follow it. It will make sure that when you hurt, you really hurt. Then it doesn't seem like TIME will ever start up again for you. Then when it does, it goes by so fast you can't keep up. So TIME it will be.

12/25/2005 6:24:19 AM
Well it didn't work out. Alone for the Holidays is my punishment for thinking that he would meet me half way on fixing things when he didn't do anything his profile said that he was or did within the 9 months we were together.
Why is it they can write such a great profile and then be the complete opposite. That is the trap of this medium I guess, can be what you want, to hell with who you really are. In time they all show their true stripes. That is the problem I didn't take the time with him.
So now that I have fallen for what I thought I was to smart to fall for, anyone out there wanting to be with me better have the truth in their profile and read mine. My profile is me and what I need. Another thing I will not do again is trust my heart so fast. Be ready for at least a year of proving you are trustworthy enough for my submission. If this is topping from the bottom then so be it. I think it is protecting myself.

12/11/2005 2:38:44 PM
Well we are talking. Trying to fix our realationship. Staying collared to Him. I really love Him and want to be with Him. So lost without Him around.

11/26/2005 9:44:52 AM
Well we didn't work out. Happens. While we did hit it off right away, the long term relationship was not matching up. I hope Him the best in finding someone that can match. Well that makes me a free agent again. Well hope to hear from some of you.

4/11/2005 8:00:00 PM

Well Master and I are looking for a sister for me to play with. While this will not be a person that will live with us, we hope that she will be with us for a long time. If she wants to find a Master of her own at least W/we are able to get her to the places to be introduced  to people and networking. While she is looking she can gain experience with U/us. Time for bed. Later. Be safe and well, have fun,


3/8/2005 8:31:21 AM
Well I didn't think it possible, but I found a Master. We hit it off right away. While I know W/we are still in the honeymoon phase of our relationship I know this will be for the rest of my life. He is the man of and in my dreams. Thank you to all of you that helped me during the down times in my life.

12/10/2004 6:48:39 PM
Well my friends say that I should try to send some letters out again. Why, when no one answers them? Even if just to say not interested would be nice. I hear all these people complaining how no one answers their mail but yet do they answer all their mail? Have found that they don't. So they are guilty of what they are complaining about. Thought the idea of this was communication. If you are not willing to at least be curtious and answer mail why are you here? If your going to find someone you have to answer the mail. By the way why bother being here to find someone if you aren't going to fill out a profile. While I do not believe that the best profile tells all about someone it would be nice to at least know a little about a person before you write them.

10/31/2004 9:05:26 PM
Keep getting mail from people telling me to stay positive and keep trying. It is nice of them. Just so hard to do. Too many players out here. The good ones seem to be taken or want poly. Too bad most of these people didn't live near me then they could introduce me to singles that they know. But then that doesn't seem to happen either for me. I am in 4 BDSM communities. How much more networking could I do? The people I know in these communities aren't introducing me to anyone. So how am I supposed to stay positive? If the people around me don't introduce me to others then maybe I am not fit for a Dom. There has to be something wrong with me then right? Well thanks for the letters anyway.

10/25/2004 6:46:47 AM
Well if I get any letters I will reply. Hope E/everyone finds what they want. Just not meant for me it seems. Later. Be safe and well, have fun, chris

10/24/2004 7:31:57 PM
I know I have said it but this time I am doing it. There is no one out there for me. I am done looking. Guess I will just live out my life alone. Unwanted. The way I came into this world. Thanks for all the kind things some of you have said. Wish some of it was true for me. However, this has proved that if it wasn't for bad luck I wouldn't have any luck at all. If I get mail I will answer it. Will leave my profiles up on here and the other services. But I am not going to write anymore. Just serve my community and be done with it. Later. Be safe and well, have fun, chris

10/12/2004 6:05:57 PM
Well guess the gem was a stone. Haven't heard from Him and He has been on. Never fails. Just don't know anymore. Why do people just stop talking. That is rude. In a lifestyle that is based on openness, truth, trust, and honesty you would think that if they are not interested they would at least say "Good luck." How much time and hard is that?

10/5/2004 8:04:25 AM
Have gotten a couple of kind e-mails. Trying to help me find myself again. Got an e-mail from a Dom that is looking as well. Sent Him a bad letter. After I got to thinking awhile at work (taking care of my plants at work tend to calm me) I sent Him an apology. Then resent an answer letter that was more me. He forgave me and now we are talking. Sometimes you run into gems. They just don't want me is all. We shall see. Trying to keep my head up and think positive. Just have to get back on track somehow. Still questioning myself.

10/3/2004 6:21:34 PM
I look at the profiles now and feel like I am not worth doing this. Don't want to waste anyones time with me. Why can't they just tell me what is wrong? I doubt everything now. Don't even feel like leaving the house. Well winter is coming. I tend to stay in more. Maybe that is the sollution just stay home and sleep. That way no one has to deal with me anymore. Maybe sleeping will help me not want anyone or anything. I have my dog to talk to. Maybe that is all I deserve.

10/2/2004 4:44:00 PM
Well sitting here alone again. Why do I even try? Last night it was suggested that I submit to someone so that they could tone their skills at being a Dom and let Him make me better so that a Dom would want me. Ok, I'm fat and ugly and now am not anything a Dom would want. Wish they would just tell me what is wrong. I thought friends are supposed to be honest. Well guess my search is done. I am not anything a Dom would want.

9/28/2004 7:18:55 PM
Well my surgery went well. Only 3 weeks and almost as good as new with only 3 little holes in my knee to show for it.  How far we have come. Have contacted some Doms the past 2 weeks. Same old garbage, they reply and stop talking. If I said something wrong or if they don't like what they see why don't they say it rather than just stop. Beginning to think this lifestyle isn't as open and honest as we say it is. You don't have to be mean about anything but a quick "Don't think it will work." Would be nice. Then maybe being nice, open, and honest isn't how most people are. If that is the case then stop the world I want to get off.

8/19/2004 2:52:42 PM
Well a couple of people contacted me about keeping my chin up and that there are real people out there. I know there are, but where the hell are they. Well now I have to face surgery on my knee. Not an easy thing to face when your alone. Don't have many friends and they work so won't get much help there. Will have to set up the house so that I can just fend for myself for a week and not worry about having to do much but sleep. Right now is the time I could use a Master. Have someone to hold, coddle me, and tell me it is going to be ok. Come out of surgery to a face that is lovingly smiling at me and whispers in my ear "Wait till you are standing and I am going to beat that bottom red." Might have just tried to stand right there and then lol. Oh well. Such is my life.

8/12/2004 3:26:31 PM

Well no new contacts. Guess the players understand that I don't play their games. Changed my profile some. Think it reads better, not as chopped up. If there are any r/t Doms here I hope they take a look. At least I am going to be busy hehehe. Got a picnic in Chicago this Sun. May meet some new Doms there. Going to Wisc. the following weekend. Am going to be a demonstration sub for a whip demo a Dom I know is giving. The other sub never had a single tail used on her and I am a pain slut lol. Should be interesting ~smile~. Then it is camping in Wisc. the following weekend. Back to Chicago for a Labor Day weekend that has a picnic on Sun. Lots of fresh air for the end of the summer lol. At least I am still out there trying.


8/5/2004 10:42:55 AM
Well another wannabe down. You know this gets old after awhile. I know I have probably upset some real Doms because I have to be so cautious of the wannabes. It seems like no one cares that subs get mentally, physically, and emotionally hurt. All they care about is how they want it and I should just trust no matter what. I wouldn't even do that in a nilla meeting. This is so much more dangerous. Guess to find someone I might have to end up in the hospital a few times. Sad that I can't be safe and still find someone.

7/27/2004 12:21:07 PM

7/26/2004 8:43:54 PM
Well another person just up and disappear. What is it with people? You talking to them and everything seems to be going good, then poof, they are gone. I am so tired of investing time on here just for them to just stop talking. The least they could do is respect me enough to at least say "It was fun. Have a good life. Hope you find what your looking for." Anything! Or the other good one is that you set up to meet and they don't show up. Wish people would be true to themselves to at least be honest with others.

7/20/2004 5:16:22 AM
Well had to add that I want references from the local BDSM community for Doms that contact me today. Hate the mistrust. Was reading profiles and one Dom was upset about the same thing. Had to write Him. Let Him know that He is not the only one out here that rants about the lack of trust we have to have. How do we start trusting with so many players, wannabes, and nut jobs out there? Thought I had it figured out. This meeting on line doesn't help either. So many things that can go wrong.

7/17/2004 2:39:32 PM
I hate having to contact people on here. You talk to someone and try to meet. Because of safety issues Doms take offense. Then they say you are not real. My safety is real. If you have a problem with it tough. To many nut cases out there. Then there is the problem that everyone lives so far away. How do you solve that? There is no solution. Trust and end up in the hospital more times than not. Looks like that is our lifestyle. 

7/15/2004 11:56:35 AM

Well have been hurt again. When will I learn. It is to the point that I want to just leave D/s. Only I know I can't be nilla ever again. So that leaves me 3 choices:
1. Lay down and die.
2. Become part of the toy bags of those that have hurt me and at least get my masochistic side satisfied.
3. Try again.

Shit this is so hard. Really it doesn't have to be if more people would just be true with themselves and me.


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cocanina
 
 Age: 23
 Toulouse, France