I'm getting tired of all the rules.

It may be that I just read too much, I never thought that sentence would come out of my mouth or fingers in this case, but the world according to the people on has a ton of rules, way more than the vanilla world and although it may be necessary in some cases, like when you see a bubble wrapped person floating in a pool, wow, can't think of too many things less safe, I'm sure rules are helpful to ensure the non-drowning of said bubble wrapped person, but in general, I had no idea there would be so many rules, lists, must have, must be, must do or not do, say or not say, be or not be, when it comes to being a Dom or sub or slave or Top or bottom or Sadist or Masochist or whateverthefuckyouwanttocallyourbubblewrappedass.

I know, I'm picking on that picture which has absolutely nothing to do with what I am trying to say. Sorry to all the bubble wrapped among us. See, I just can't help it.

As I was saying.

This is not another one of those, Jimmy has no clue how to label himself so he's ranting again. This isn't about how I identify, I've come to a fairly decent understanding with myself and that's that for that. If you are wondering what I decided, it was a very simple; kinkyasstopbottomdomsubdependsonwhowhatwherewhenandmyfuckingmood.

Now that we have that settled.

The rules.

I have, over the past few months, read so many lists of rules on how I must be in order to be a Dom or a sub or whatever else I may want to be, there are rules for it.

A Dominant Man acts like this or that, is at least this age, dresses like this, talks like this, makes this much money, has all his shit together of course, is basically the perfect guy and that's not what someone wants, that's the rules, no option given.

If I don't act like that, dress like that or have that level of success, then I can't be that. Well fuck.

A submissive sissy ass bitch doesn't want anything at anytime from anyone, he only lives to serve and has no desires at all, ever. Wow. Can't be, don't want to be any of that.

We could get all into the "Real Man", "Real Woman" issue, which is another rant entirely and I have no clue what anyone is talking about when they pull out those terms. Real Man, as opposed to a cartoon man maybe, I digital dude, a boy? What? What is the difference between a real man and a fake man, don't answer since your answer will be different than all of the other answers even if I got 2038 responses. Real woman, same thing, real women have curves, this pissed off some skinny chick a few days ago, and I completely agreed with her, not that real woman have or don't have curves, but who the fuck made up that stupid ass rule. Real women are confident and independent and don't need a man, but they want a man to tie them up, fuck them in the ass and then punish them for liking it, but only when it suits their curvy ass or skinny ass, whatever size ass you may have. Or some shit like that. Gotta check the rules again for the details on all of that.

It's sort of like politics. Whatever fits you is how you think it should be.

Real men are short and have black hair and blue eyes and dress like shit. That's what I think. Those are my rules. I just made them up. I could make up a whole list of rules about how to be totally awesome and they would all be attributes that I possess of course. Then I would be the totally awesome guy on , since I fit all of the awesome guy rules.

You on the other hand would suck, since you don't fit the awesome guy rules.

I would then create my own set of rules on being the perfect Dom, another set on being the perfect sub, the perfect sadist, masochist and the perfect little girl.

Then I would be the totally awesome rule maker guy.

Anyone that did not fit my rules would not be able to claim to be that particular label. You would have to submit all of the proper paper work and prove to a panel of judges, consisting of Jimmy the awesome rule maker and a few hot ladies that I just feel like having hang out with me and we would decide, well, really I would decide if you qualified as whatever the fuck you want to be.

Now you are thinking, but Jimmy the awesome rule maker, who the fuck do you think you are exactly???

And, that is what I would like to say to all of the rule makers out there who love to tell everyone else how to be who they are, how to be the perfect Dom or sub, the qualifications they must possess in order to be the greatest cocksucking little girl slut ever to put a cock in her mouth or the most fantastic Queen Domme to grace us with her presence.

Who the fuck are you to tell anyone else how to be who they ARE. Your list of rules is not required or appreciated, unless it's a list of what you need, who you need, what you expect, but those are not the lists I've been seeing, those are not the rules I am talking about. People are who they are, they do things however is best for them, their relationships fit them, their pain is for them, their submission is for them, their Dominance is for them, their kink is all about them, not you, nothing they do is for you, because of you or has anything to do with you. Unless of course we are talking about a relationship you are in, which we are not are we, we are talking about you just deciding to tell everyone else the rules of the BDSM world. Oh thank you so much exalted pubba sir.

If I want to be a Dominant submissive Top sadomasochist, then that's exactly what I shall be and I will be that however gives me the most happiness, joy and pleasure, and I won't be asking the rule makers if I qualify or not.

Fuck your rules.

Your Vagina is Perfect and My Penis Hates Me.

I've been reading a number of articles, posts, rants, ramblings and the like on vaginas, which I will refer to as pussys, because that's the word I prefer and once again, I'm the one doing all the work over here.

Anyway, the general idea is that somehow, somewhere, someone told you that your pussy was not perfect and needs to be fixed since it's not the ideal shape, size, structure and some cocksucking motherfucking greedy should be chopped up and buried in ditches all up and down the east coast will, for a large fee, perform an unnecessary surgery to make your pussy lips smaller and identically shaped. In other words, the scumfucker will give you a "normal" pussy. My thoughts on this are fairly obvious I would think just by that run on sentence.

To add to your trauma, you have to worry about your scent, this seems to be another major issue, have no fear, Jimmy is here.

I'm going to first say, as someone that does not have a pussy but is a big fan and has probably seen, smelled, tasted and enjoyed more pussy than most women have in real life, in person, in living color, that you people have been misinformed, lied to, misled and all around mind fucked.

Since this post isn't just about your pussy, I'm going to quickly help you with that and then move on to the other point to this particular long winded commentary.

As a man, I have no interest in the size of your pussy lips, I wouldn't care nor do I notice if they are evenly shaped, big, small, flat, flappy, fluffy or anything of the sort. I do not care, I have never cared, I have never met a man that did care and yes, we do talk about this stuff. It is one of those body parts whose appearance is completely irrelevant. Your pussy is perfect, the fact that I am seeing it naked and about to do all sorts of wonderful things to it, with it and in it is proof that I think your pussy is perfect. It does after all, rule the world. When did women forget that.

As for scent, c'mon, lets all be big boys and girls and stop using various comparisons or terms for a womans scent that make us all sound like drunk frat boys, it bothers me. Have some fucking respect for yourself and others.

Everyone has a scent, light, strong, turned off, turned on, various times of the month, unless you are dirty and not in a good way or I think you may need to see a doctor, nothing about the way you smell is going to stop me from enjoying everything about you. If I think you are dirty or may need a doctor, I may fake a heart attack, I will grant you that, but that is like 3 people out of, well, lets not talk about numbers, but it has been 30 years of loving the pussy and I'm a slut, so do your own math.

To sum up for those in the back of the room, your pussy is perfect, it looks beautiful, it smells wonderful and it tastes delicious and to be honest, I did notice two of those things, but didn't care much because I was just so thrilled that it was on my face and if it is on my face or my face is on it, then those two things that I noticed, well, they were just perfect. At some point, after a few meetings with your naked pussy, I will notice the details that make your pussy specifically awesome, but in the beginning, really, I just want it because it's your pussy and I want you.

In opposition to this wonderful part of your anatomy, that provides so much pleasure in so many ways, I have the not so fantastic, not so wonderful, not so exceptional penis.

This is a horrible, sadistic, evil part of the male body. It isn't even close to fair in comparison to what a woman has going on.

How can I even begin to explain to you the torment that I have gone through and still go through, thanks to this fucking idiotic appendage.

First off, I do have to worry about appearance, unlike your vagina, which is always perfect, not that anyone gives a fuck anyway, people do care what my penis looks like, the shape of it, the size of it, for physical pleasure and mental stimulation, an above average to very large penis is preferred and does matter, you didn't think men fell for all of that, size doesn't matter shit did you? We just play along, if you want to pretend, we are fine pretending. Mine is certainly not big enough, I got the blue eyes though, so that evens out, fucking bullshit, I'm not sure that many are really all that big, but you would never know it since only those of a certain size are posting 248 pictures of their penis from 248 different angles all over the Internet. Then you have the cock models and porn stars, love you guys, thanks a bunch for the confidence boost. Hey, if you are that proud and it's all long and thick and perfectly shaped and beautiful in all it's glory, then have at it, let that fucker free, but unfortunately, most of us do not feel this confident and comfortable about our little Jimmys and this is a cause of stress that starts in high school and just never ends. Ever. I don't want to die because I don't want the people that take you away to see me naked.

I have to make sure you cum, TWICE, before I will even take off my pants, in the hopes that you will be past caring about size. Hey, I brought toys too, don't worry, they're much bigger, wait, stay, don't leave. Shit.

Maybe it's just me. I don't blame women, I blame that small percentage of men that have their cocks all over the place, because before the Internet, I really didn't have much to compare to, of course there were those few guys that were always so proud and letting it all hang out, but I just figured they were deformed, poor fellows, how will they get through life with that huge fucker hanging there, now that I have way too much to compare to, I'm just not happy at all. Apparently, everyone has a huge penis, except me. Well, fuck. At least I'm rich. Oh, wait, I'm broke. Nevermind.

Let us continue to what this penis actually feels like. Now, I know your pussy feels goooood. I know it. Your clit is like a wonder button that makes you feel oh so good. I am jealous, envious and pissed off all at the same time. Inside of your pussy has a similar effect, depending on what I am doing to it or putting in it. Be grateful, be happy, you have the ultimate tool in pleasure giving and receiving ever created, love your pussy, it loves you.

On the flip side of that, my penis is about as sensitive as one of my toes. An exaggeration for entertainment value, maybe a little, but for the most part, a circumsized cock is well, not all that special. Does it feel good, yes it does, depending on what you are doing to it, it can feel really good, but not like what you get, not like a pussy.

Shall we continue and really delve into the terrible torture of having a penis, yes, we must, we've come this far.

It does not work as advertised.

It just doesn't.

If I had purchased this thing from any reputable retailer I would have certainly been given a refund years ago. Not that anyone would even have the nerve to sell such a dysfunctional product. It would have been pulled from the shelves many years ago in favor of the 8 inch realistic cock, $60 bucks at Adam & Eve. By far and away a much better option.

I have no idea what it is doing at any moment, I have no idea what it may or may not do at any moment, I have no control over it at all, none. Seriously, I'm not playing. I have actually thought, what the fuck are you doing. Why the fuck are you doing that now. Why the fuck won't you help me out here. What the fuck is wrong with you.

Of course I talk to my penis, however, talking to it doesn't help, it just smirks at me.

Moving along, my penis hates me, this is sort of like the last thing I said, only worse. My penis, which can be hard as steel when waking up in the morning or watching an episode of Californication, can be softer than pudding while trying to fuck a beautiful ass. What the fuck is that about. How does that even work. No one tells you this shit, no one talks about it. This has nothing to do with age, this hard when it shouldn't be and not hard when it should be has been going on since the beginning and it's the most annoying thing ever. Plus, women will take offense to this, well, excuse me, how the fuck do you think I feel, it's mine and it could care less what I think, did you think it would give a fuck what you think? It thinks it's funny.

I also have to worry about when it will or will not cum, yes, this is an issue, I know, guys are easy, they just cum when you look at them, not true, sorry, again, maybe it's just me, but I do not have a special orgasm button, you can't blow me into cumming, fuck me into cumming, rub me into cumming, it's all in my head, I am way too much in my head anyway, I understand that, the kinky ones normally are, if a blow job was the end all be all like most of the men I know think it is, I wouldn't be here, I would be getting a blow job. You have a better chance of talking me into cumming than you do fucking me into cumming, which is not a good thing. This will also offend you and once again, how the hell do you think I feel, you had 5 orgasms tonight, I haven't cum since Tuesday.

I do also have to worry about those times when it will decide, just to fuck with me, to cum in 3 minutes. I know, you can't believe it, say it ain't so Jimbo, yes, its happened, once again, you will be annoyed and I will be all like, wow, you have no idea how flattered you should be, took the last chick two days.

But wait, there's more. A type of super hero has come to the rescue, something that will ensure that your penis does exactly what you want it to do, when you want it to do it, yes my friends, here we have a pill that will make you very hard for at least a few hours and the only side effect is;

Headache, flushing of the face, upset stomach, changes in color vision (such as trouble telling the difference between blue and green objects or having a blue color tinge to them), eyes being more sensitive to light, or blurred vision, a sudden decrease or loss of vision in one or both eyes, sudden loss or decrease in hearing, sometimes with ringing in the ears and dizziness, heart attack, stroke, irregular heart beats, and death.

They seriously said death. If the pill doesn't kill you, the price will, last side effect, about $20 a pill. Fuck you, keep it.

Just to sum that up, anyone not in tip top medical condition with money to burn, in other words, those that would not need a pill to help them out, should not take a pill to help them out. Right, get that, if you need it, you aren't healthy enough to take it, if you are healthy enough to take it, you don't fucking need it.

20 somethings are taking these pills just for the fun of it, can't say I blame them, but a 50 year old that is in normal condition for a 50 year old American, probably shouldn't risk it.

Not only does my penis hate me, but those that make penis pills hate me and want to kill me.

Lets say it's not physical, but mental, like, your penis just hates you, well, then you try and help it out by getting real freaky, real kinky, getting an account on , meeting other really freaky, kinky people, letting anyone do anything they want to it and it's friends, those two joksters that are always hanging around it, but this requires you to tell on yourself, to actually say, to a real person, a real live girl, well, I would like you to shove this very thick, steel rod into my penis, cause it's bad and deserves to be punished, put on this very large strap on, fuck my ass while hitting my balls with this paddle, calling me names the entire time, that may help, then again, it may not.

Be a sport and give it a shot. You just never fucking know with this thing.

If that doesn't work, I've got plenty of other activities I can do to you instead, they do involve tying up and smacking your tits, stretching your ass, fisting your pussy, torturing your clit until you are begging me to stop, seeing how many times I can make you cum and then beating you with a belt because you couldn't make me cum, all the while calling you a cunt, a whore and a slut, but don't worry, if that doesn't work we have an entire tish list to go through. Worst case, we call in reinforcements.

Lastly, what are the chances, maybe lastly, everything else effects my penis. Stress, blood pressure, heart condition, overall physical condition, smoking, drinking, thinking that you are so fucking hot and holy shit I'm not, all of these things effect my penis, not my hands or my mouth or my ability to walk and talk, just my fucking cock. Why.

It should be simple, hot ass, hard cock. Beautiful woman, hard cock. Sexy naked chick, hard cock. Simple. Easy. Stress free, drama free, no embarrassment or humiliation, just fun and pleasure.

But no. No fun in that.

Now, I know there are men reading this thinking, this guys's got issues, I have no idea what he is talking about, my cock is my best friend, always ready to perform wonders for the ladies and a very respectable size to boot. Well, whoopdie doo da for you, I'm happy for you, because I'm a nice guy, as stated in my previous rant, I'm on a 24 hour roll, really, I am happy for you. Doesn't help me at all though.

And the women, all thinking, check this fucking nut off the list, yes, I understand, I don't blame you, way too much trouble, effort, and you just really never know what you are going to get. I don't even know what you are going to get. That other guy seems like a better option for you, I agree. Plus, way too much information, who writes about all of this shit. Not only does he have major complexes, but he has performance anxiety along with penis envy and he over shares. Yup. It's true. I'm a fucking mess.

That is what happens when your penis hates you.

So, to go back to the start, love your vagina, adore it, worship it, I certainly do, it is so much better than a penis, if given a choice, before being born and knowing what I know now, I would have picked, FEMALE PLEASE, no fucking doubt about it, even the clothes are better and the boobs, well, who doesn't love boobs, but I wasn't, so I am stuck with a penis that hates me.

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For entertainment purposes only, the writers penis may or may not be very large and may or may not be always hard. The only way to know for sure is to take off your clothes and get tied to the bed. At least then one of us won't care.

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As a final note, it is true, as many have mentioned in the comments, that when you have all of these issues, you become rather adept over the years at using your mouth, fingers, hands, toys, getting really kinky and talking nice or dirty or whatever is appropriate, in other words, getting you off by any means necessary, without having to use my penis, since I never know what the hell it's going to decide to do at any moment and most women don't cum that way anyway. I am loving the ladies that have said, I don't care how you get me off, just get me off, I can work with that, of course that is when my cock will be rock hard and she will be saying, well c'mon, lick my pussy.

WOULD YOU STILL...

Would you still want me if you knew what I really needed, what I was thinking, feeling, the randomness of it all, the unruly nature of my desires as they course through me, raw and intense with no real purpose, not giving a fuck if they are Top or bottom, Dom or sub, sometimes I try to stop them, no, not that, not now, not with her, she won't want you, go away, what is your problem, but they insist, coming from deep within, secret, passionate, intense, intimate... Needs.

Is it the Dom side that you see that makes you wet with desire, that makes you want me, to please, serve and worship me, to pleasure me and rest your head on my chest or in my lap.

If I was to stop grabbing you by your throat, kissing you hard while thrusting in your tight ass, if I was to stop hurting you and telling you what a perfect little slut you are, stop making you my whore, stop making you tell me that you are my cunt, tell me, tell me what you are, now cum for me, that's what you need, that's what you love about me, I know it, but what if, ... . If I stopped it all for that night, after you had exploded and looked into me with those adoring eyes, stopped it all and laid my head on your thigh, licking your wetness, kissing your most delicious place, from your dripping cunt to your sweet ass and back again, moving you to sit on my face, the pure pleasure I get from being engulfed by you, as close as I can be without being inside of you, moving your hips with my hands so you are fucking my face. So wet, so sexy, such a wonderful place for me to be. I get off on giving you that pleasure, having you cum in my mouth, then turning around to sit your sexy ass on my face, making me stick my tongue out and in, roughly beating my cock and smacking my balls until I feel an explosion coming from my toes and going through my entire body and out of my cock. A giggle and a good boy is what I get, both having forgotten how we started that round, going from you being my cunt to me being your ... well, whatever the fuck you want me to be really. If what makes you happy is what makes me happy, does that make you run away or make you cum and stay.

Would you still want me if that's what I needed at that very moment?

Perhaps it is my ability to revel in submission that takes you to another level of orgasmic bliss, the never ending desire to please you, every inch of your body, your hands on my head, guiding me harder, softer, lower, higher, telling you of the happiness and joy you bring me, how I can't believe you let me even touch you here, kiss you there, whispering that I need you to fuck me like that, showing you the new toy that is anything but Dominant and asking if you would play with it, with me, right now, and seeing the wicked smile on your face, knowing the fun we will have, the pleasure we will get, begging you to hurt me like that, more, yes, please. Maybe that is the person you need, what you want from me, to be worshiped, adored, pleased and pleasured all of the time, every time. Knowing again that what makes you happy, makes me happy.

But ...

If I turned on you, smacked you, shoved my cock in your mouth and fucked your face, taking it out just before I cum so that I can fist fuck that sweet cunt of yours and make you scream and beg and cum for me over and over telling you what a good girl you are just before I grab you by the hair and make you beg me to let you put me back in your mouth so you can swallow all of my cum because I know you love it, I know you need it, I know you crave it, slut.

Would you still want me if that's what I needed at that very moment?

I can and would give you whatever you needed, depending on the day, hour, the fucking minute, your mood, your emotions, your head space, the toys you like and the words you moan over, I could give you that and I want all of you, every part, every side, every twisted thought that you were afraid to share with the others, I want to know it all, I want to know you, every tasty, beautiful, holy fuck I can't believe you just said that, did that, want that, oh hell yeah, I want all of you, but ...

If you wouldn't want all of me in return, all of the time, then you don't deserve one side or the other any of the time. I can't be half of me. I've been doing that for too long. I'm tired. I'm done caring what anyone thinks. I'm a whole person and I love every bit of my sick fucking mind that won't stop at Dom or sub or top or bottom and you will say but no one cares, just be yourself and I can tell you after 44 years of experience that is some serious bullshit, they certainly do care, but I don't, not anymore, I just can't do it, not for anyone, not anymore.

You can't have the Dom or the sub, the Top or the bottom, you can have all of me or none of me. I've learned the all important lesson; those that really love, care and desire me, will settle for no less than all of me.

The love you have for all of me and the love I have for all of you is my happiness.

She needed me ...

to suffer for her.
to bleed for her.
to ache for her.
to cry for her.
to beg for her.
to live for her.

She needed me ...

to adore her.
to worship her.
to need her.
to tell her.
to love her.
to be hers.

She needed me ...

to make her smile.
to make her laugh.
to make her feel.
to make her happy.
to make her mine.

She Needed Me.

So I did.

It's Just Play Anyway...

You struggle still, with just enough resolve to convince yourself that you haven't completely submitted, just enough to make me smile at how uncomfortable it makes you to be My cunt, My whore, My good girl, Mine.

I'm sure you can't believe it, can't understand how you got to this point, can't figure out what the fuck has happened. Sometimes, you just get lucky.

It's just play anyway, isn't it, just sexy, sensual, sexual, play. Top - bottom - Top - bottom - bottom - bottom, seems to be more bottom lately, how long has it been since you played on Top, how long has it been since you wanted to play on Top, I noticed and supported you, don't worry about it princess, I love you just the way you are, you've noticed but haven't really given it much thought, blew it off, no big deal, next time, next time, next time, but it was all so good, so new, so right to give in, give up, give yourself to me and then their you were on your knees, kneeling before me, crawling to me, begging, sucking, looking up at me with those eyes, they weren't playing, your soaking wet pussy wasn't playing, I was not playing, you were exactly where you wanted to be, needed to be and you weren't even close to done giving me your body, tied to the bed, beaten and choked and fucked in so many ways, oh, it's ok, it's just bottom play.

Then I took your mind, good girl I say and you cum, My cunt I say and you cum, My whore I say and you cum, My perfect little slut I say and you cum ... you whisper, thank You, each time, louder, thank You, thank You, thank You. Good girl. Each Time. Yes Sir.

I love that look in your eyes, that look on your face. The trust, the passion, the adoration. Everything else is gone, it's just me and you, look at me, tell me, say it, you know now what I want to hear, you have learned, mmmmm, good girl. You escaped into me and now things certainly have gotten away from you, you weren't ready, you thought we were just playing.

You don't struggle when you are with me anymore, that is over, it's not necessary to pretend, it's ok to give in, we both know what you need, it's just play anyway, isn't it.

I watched you go through all the phases, struggling, fighting with yourself, doing your best to stay almost neutral, teetering in the middle, you tried, you really did, but I felt you change, I felt your need, I felt you give in, I felt you fall.

I knew when I had you. I knew when you were mine. I felt the shift when I smacked your face and saw only love in your eyes. My submissive. You would still argue that fact, I'm sure I'll get a cute little message after you read this, stomping your feet and pounding your fists, for now, but not when we are together, then you are different, you don't struggle, you don't fight, you just give yourself to me.

It's going to get more intense, more intimate, more controlling, more pushing you, more take it for Me, more thank You and yes Sir, more pain, more pleasure and much deeper submission.

I need all of you and you need to give Me all of you. Such a good girl.

It's not just play anymore, is it.

My Cunt. My Whore. My Love.

I got a response to my last post that made me think again about the Top/bottom labels, which I find very helpfull for discussing this lifestyle, what people really mean when they say things, what they are really looking for.

For example, I see a lot of female submissive profiles that will say something along the lines of, I am only interested in this or that in the bedroom. 

Well, I don't think CM has Top/bottom as an option but they should, because all of those people are bottoms, they are not submissives/slaves.

D/s has nothing to do with sex, I actually hate when people say that, it sounds so high and mighty, like "oh, you are here for sex, how cute and silly of you.", in my opinion, it does have a lot to do with sex, but that's not what I mean, what I mean is that what makes a relationship D/s is mental, it's an understanding, it's a need of one person to submit and another to Dominate in a relationship, it carries over to the sex, but anyone can have kinky sex, any vanilla couple can decide to tie each other up one night, call each other names, spank and get rough with each other.  Once they are done and back out on the couch watching CSI, nothing changed, they are the same couple they were before, just a little more kinky.

Same goes for D/s, if you are in a loving, caring, long term relationship, then you should be willing to accomodate and be open minded to your partners sexual desires, no matter what they may be, even if it doesn't fit into what we normally think of as sexually Dominant or sexually submissive.  You bang around for a few hours, everyone gets off, has fun, has a pleasurable experience and when you are done, he's still Dom and she's still sub or visa versa. 

If anything changed because he held you down and fucked your ass and you liked it,  then you didn't have much of a D/s relationship to begin with, your role as the Domme wasn't solid, your foundation was shaky.

Which is why we use the Top/bottom terms.  They really do help.  You don't want to say, he Dominated me last night if you are the Domme, so you say, he Topped me.  You enjoy being taken, manhandled, bent over and fucked good, so you say, I'm Dominant, but enjoy being a bottom from time to time with the right person. 

This allows us to explore and experience all of our needs without changing who we are in the relationship.  Who we need to be in our day to day life and day to day relationship, Dom, Master, Domme, Mistress, etc. should not mean that you can't bottom on Friday night after too many glasses of wine.

However, it does seem to me that many people are not really Dom/Domme or sub/slaves, they really are Top or bottom, just flat out kinky really.  That's all fine to me, the problem seems to be the community, it does not seem to be fine to the BDSM community as a whole, they like their labels, they like their structure, they like to know who's who and what's what.  They don't like switches, tops, bottoms, kinksters, they want everyone to fall into Dom/sub/slave because as I said above, they aren't thinking sexually, they are much more concerned with the relationship dynamic outside of sex.  If you are anything but Dom-Domme/sub-slave, then you are just here for the sex and they don't take that seriously. 

Really, they are the minority, most people are not interested in a 24/7 total power exchange, they are much more interested in whose getting tied up and how hard can I spank you before you pack your shit and run into the arms of some boring ass vanilla dude.  Even the acts that are not  sexual are turn-ons to most of us, simply doing something because you were told to do it can be enough to cause an intense sexual reaction. Telling a grown woman what to wear, where she can and can't go, what she can and can't eat, what she can and can't buy, etc. no matter what anyone tries to say, is a turn on to them, to both of them or they would have never gotten into it in the first place. 

So, my opinion on this is that people should use the terms more often, since it normally suits them, just say, I'm a bottom, I'm a Top, I'm not really into being a Dom or sub all day, every day and don't give a fuck what anyone thinks about it, you have to be true to yourself first, before you can find the relationship that will make you happy.

As always, I'm just ranting, I have no real point and it's too early for me to be rambling on about anything, but I did anyway so that's that. 

I have gotten more and more interested in abuse, physical, mental, humiliation, pain, etc.  All in the dynamic of a healthy relationship of course, if you understand that and have deep desires to be abused, then we should talk.

I posted a little story yesterday asking what a submissive/slave female would do if her Dom/Master guy was caught being less than Dominant with a Dominant woman.

Really less than Dominant.

The reaction I got was expected.

Mostly, they said they would not feel the same way about him and could not be submissive to him.

I completely understand the thinking here, however, I would like to point out that if you are really submissive than his happiness and pleasure should be your happiness and pleasure, so long as he is Dominant to you and gives you what you need it really shouldn't matter to you how he gets pleasure from others, or so you would think anyway.

Also, I can't help but mention the double standard, if it was a Dominant woman who was being submissive to a particular Dominant man, no one would think anything of it or care.  Her submissives would still be submissive to her.

One last point, it is a bit odd that people in such a lifestyle as this, place judgements on how others should or shouldn't act, I found that most interesting of all.

I have no real point to make here and this doesn't really effect me personally (although I do not play into perceived roles very well and do not place those restrictions on others) just making a little interesting observation.  At least I find it interesting.

I often wonder about my Humiliation desires.

It's in my nature to be kind, respectful, considerate, to want everyone around me to be as emotionally comfortable as possible, in that way, I consider myself a complete Gentleman.

However, humiliation is a part of my personality, I find this conflict interesting.

I can be brutal, intense and extreme, mentally speaking, in my words, acts and commands.

I don't feel this need towards everyone and anyone, not even all subs/slaves, it's a particular type of person or a way I feel about that person and it's not a dislike or desire to hurt them, actually, if I feel those things I wouldn't be bothering with the person to begin with. 

It is a benefit I guess if they are into humiliation but certainly not a requirement for me to want to explore that dynamic.  Really, I don't care.

I am normally the type that is spouting off self help, personal developement type stuff and want everyone around me to be better, whatever that means to them. I lift people up, I compliment and praise, I help if possible, I want those around me to be successful and happy, again, whatever that means to them, this includes anyone who is Mine, no matter what their place in our relationship.

So, how then can I get pleasure by pointing out what a dirty whore, dumb cunt, no good fucking cum slut you are while dreaming up all sorts of degrading things for you to do or for me to do to you, all for my own pleasure and amusement.

The next day, I will be telling you that you are beautiful, smart, deserving, my pride and joy.

It's fucking insane.

I've got issues.

Someone figure this all out and send me a paper on it.  There has to be a psych major in the audience.

By the way, you look like you've gained a few pounds.  You may want to watch that.

Why?

I would love to find someone that could tell me why.

I'm not so concerned really, I don't think it's extremely important to know, just more interested than anything else.

Let me explain.

I have vanilla guy friends, I know what they think when they see a woman on the street, they tell you what they think and it's always the most boring, predictable shit.  You know, look at that slut, I'd like to fuck her sideways or, wow, did you see the body on that one, blah, blah, blah.

When I see a beaufiful, sophisticated, well dressed woman on the street, I think Duct Tape, along with degrading her, humiliating her and turning her into my own personal cum slut, crawling around with a dildo and a butt plug locked in place, making her beg to suck, fuck and cum.

When I see a 22 year old with a short skirt and cowboy boots walking into a club, I think, I bet I could fist fuck her ass, get her to take off her panties and give out blow jobs in the bathroom.  Just give me 2 weeks with that chick.

When I see a new mom, I think forced lactation, putting her on her hands and knees strapped to a milking machine while I fuck her ass and invite friends.  Breast bondage comes to mind next, watching them turn pretty colors.

When I'm at the strip club, you don't even want to know what I'm thinking, a string of cute, sexy girls doing what they do at strip clubs, you can't even imagine what I'm thinking (Well, maybe some of you can), but it's certainly not, here's $25 bucks for a lap dance.  Lap Dance?  You have got to be kidding me with that.  Do I get to spank? Do I get to call you every degrading name I can think of?  Do I even get to make you pee your panties?  Nope, nothing fun. 

I see others enjoying them though, the bounce on your lap dance. 

So, the question was, Why?

Why do I think what I think when I see what I see.

Why do they think what you would expect them to think when they see the exact same thing.

Sometimes I share, while they are talking about how good they will give it to whatever woman they are seeing, how hot she is or how she just has to be a slut wearing whatever she is wearing, I will share my thoughts, and I do think they think I'm kidding, just trying to be funny or outrageous.

That's probably for the best.

I understand completely that it is why we are all on this site, it's the same answer, it's why Match . com has 20 million members and CollarMe has a few hundred thousand, I'm guessing, but that's what the other site has so it's probably around the same.  The answer is the same, I just don't know the answer.

There must be a book around here I could read that would tell me why we are the way we are.

I sure am glad we are though, those other people aren't very interesting and aren't any fun at all.