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Im an energetic, outgoing kinky guy looking for a sexy, fun-loving gal who shares my deep and enduring interest in BDSM, TPE, and Ds. While not the only or even the most important part, BDSM is to me a necessary part of any successful relationship. If you think we might have compatible interests, contact me and lets find out if we can click together, and if that also holds true in other areas of our lives. My vanilla interests vary from the eclectic to the extreme. I enjoy both indoor and outdoor sports and live a generally active lifestyle, but I also like to kick back now and then. I hope to find a companion who can not only keep up with me, but will also challenge me to keep up with her.I have finally started to write in my journal, so if I am of interest to you, then you should read that too.
I am much more active using my fet life profile which is one4kinkyfun so I hope you will contact me there if you truly wish to make a connection with me. I rarely use this CS account any more, for reasons which should be obvious if you have read the rest of my profile here.
NOTE Collarspace no longer allows the creation of new user profiles. I couldnt figure out how to create a new profile so I clicked on Support (at the bottom) and it shows a link for Create Account. But when I clicked it, it took me to Alt.com, which is a pay site! This is a ripoff and I want to tell everyone about it!
This may be the end of Collarspace for me. The last two dommes I met here both asked me for money (either cash or an iTunes gift card), and both times before we had ever met IRL (as if either of them even intended to actually meet me IRL anyway). But when I tried to create a Journal entry about them, CS wont let me! Ill keep my profile active just to check message occasionally, but if you send me a message, please be prepared to wait awhile before I read it.
Yet another thing Collarspace has done to alienate its users Now, when I click Next profile, it only scrolls through a list of a dozen or so profiles I have seen before and possibly saved as Favorites. After the tenth or twelfth profile I can see, clicking the Next profile button again and again only continues to show the same last profile I looked at. It wont show me any more profiles no matter how many times I click. Disgusting! These people are clearly trying to intentionally piss off their users! This site blows chunks! Money-grubbing assholes! Fuck off, Collarspace. I will NEVER EVER join Alt-com OR ANY OTHER WEBSITE I FIND OUT IS OWNED BY THE SAME FUCKING ASSHOLES!
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I am trapped in vanillaland. She has many fine qualities, and is intensely loyal to me. But no kink! She has become depressingly uninterested in sex, even the vanilla kind (which barely interests me anyway, and perhaps she is finally starting to get this). I dont know how long this will go on, but if things stay the way they are, I cannot see myself growing old with this woman, despite that I truly do love her and also that we have made many fond memories together.
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Well, the vanilla is pretty good, but the BDSM component is sadly just about nonexistent. The closest we've gotten to any real kink was the time I tried to get her to let me tie her spread-eagle to the 4-corner bed in the guest room with some nice soft rope I dug up somewhere. She said OK, but then asked me to use silk scarves instead. They're way too colorful! Not a D/s feeling at all! That was months ago, and it was the first and last time we have ever practiced any actual bondage, although that experience was so lame it could hardly be classified as real bondage, and halfway through she got a cramp and I had to stop and pull out and frantically untie her, and of course I couldn't get it up for shit after that. Too bad, though. We are compatible in so many vanilla ways (her Harley is newer and nicer than mine! and she took up downhill skiing at my request and promptly bought all the gear and in only her first season is getting pretty good) and she is smart, funny, athletic, likes to laugh and cuddle and work hard and play hard and is into all kinds of other interesting things. A terrific best friend, but not, as it is turning out, such a good D/s dynamic in this relationship. I don't know how it will all turn out, but I suspect I will be terribly disappointed no matter how it's resolved. I'll keep trying, though. Maybe I'll "accidentally" leave a Centurians catalog or something similar lying around the house until she finds it and confronts me.
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Had some fun today with a tape dispenser. While trying to wrap a UPS package to return a mail-ordered item, she took it upon herself to object to my snickering (about her inability to finish the job without wasting half the tape) by using the tape dispenser on my mouth! With only marginally better success, but it was good for a laugh.
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Well, faithful readers, there is finally some good news. Yes, she is vanilla, and no, I have not broken the news to her about just HOW extremely kinky I am (I have given her several hints and I get a chuckle out of her every time), but we've now been together six months, and the vanilla sex is so great (so far) that every time I think THIS is the time I will break out the ropes and purple-fur-lined handcuffs, she ends up being so sexy and getting me so horny just by herself, I end up putting it off yet again (all I have to do to keep my raging hard-on is visualize her bound and gagged while I fuck her until she has her nth orgasm of the evening). It WILL happen, sooner or later. After all, she is very proud of her charm bracelet with the tiny toy handcuffs in it, as well as the handcuff-zipper-pull on one of her leather jackets. But she hasn't gone any further than that - yet. I will NOT chance blowing it this time by broaching the subject of BDSM too soon in too forceful a way. I WILL continue to bring ropes and handcuffs in my overnight bag every time I spend a night at her home. One day the subject will come up (perhaps while snuggling together post-coitally), she will agree to let me tie her up, and THEN I will show her the true nature of the force! Until that day I continue to enjoy her fascinating company in so many other ways (for example, she is the only person I've ever known who can beat me at scrabble).
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As expected, it has happened. My recent vanilla relationship has ended. This is not surprising, but it is frustrating (in more ways than one). I have also found myself almost too eager in my willingness to enter into conversation (and potentially something more) with those I've met here, perhaps too willingly in the eyes of some who've contacted me. If you have contacted me and you now feel like that, please give me another chance. I am really very respectful of women and would willingly submit myself to any BDSM scene that I would ever ask you to submit to. I am a true Switch, in that I believe the most fulfilling possible relationship would be with a partner with whom I share not only enough vanilla interests to keep the conversation going, but also the willingness to both top and bottom each other (though not in the same scene - that WOULD be weird) at least enought to be able to fully appreciate "how the other half lives," if for no other reason. I'm also somewhat less experienced as a Dom than as a Sub, so if you're expecting me to be properly assertive and "read your submissive mind" as you think an experienced Dom should, please be patient - I'm a quick study, and if this is on your wish list then I provide the opportunity for you to help me learn how to fulfill your fantasies (always SSC of course) without having to unlearn too many bad habits (well, maybe just a few) on the way.
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One of the things I find most frustrating about life is that I cannot seem to attract a woman with whom I am compatible in all the vanilla ways, who also shares my love of BDSM. I recently began to spend a lot of time in the company of a very attractive woman who is sexy, smart, likes to laugh, works and plays hard all the time, and wants nothing more than to spend one Sunday morning after another lazing in bed with me playing with each other's bodies. I seem to have had no trouble satisfying her, but I can't seem to achieve orgasm (to satisfy myself too) no matter how long I go at it (occasionally to the point of having actually abraded myself and become too sore to continue). She has been very understanding (she thinks) about my inability to cum, and has been willing to suck me off until the cows come home (which is nice, since she has the ability to make me feel good without exacerbating the soreness). But when I have broached the subject of BDSM (typically in a lightheartedly joking manner intended to gauge her interest while still maintaining discretion about mine), she has firmly and consistently displayed no interest, nor does she seem to be open-minded on the matter. If she showed the slightest interest, I am confident I could spurt all over her at the slightest provocation, but it seems there has to be at least the fantasizable possibility of a D/s aspect to the relationship before I can bring myself to climax. I don't expect the relationship to last, since my interest continues to wane as time goes by (it has reached a point where I can only get it hard with her by fantacizing about tying her up), and the last time I openly discussed my need for BDSM with a partner in a relationship, the relationship ended literally the same day I initiated the conversation. I won't try that again soon. It would seem more likely that I will one day find a BDSM-loving woman who is also compatible with me in other areas of life than that I will find a vanilla woman I like (and who likes me) and then successfully introduce her to the D/s scene. But I've been both here and at b.com for a long time and no one seems interested. Your loss, all of you. And so it goes.
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I'm becoming more introspective of late. If you email me and I dont respond, please understand my failure to do so may have nothing at all to do with you or your email, except perhaps for your timing. I seek what may not exist, that perfect vanilla partner who also likes to be flogged and fucked, and tied and teased, and may even like the idea of doing little tying and teasing (and flogging and fucking) herself now and then (or not). No one is perfect, but I'm picky enough and demanding enough that I've spent years alone that I didnt need to, because I met someone nice but didnt see the possibility for a truly honest (in that I mean D/s) relationship. I've even been called gay (I'm not) by some women who simply didnt understand that I while I found them attractive, I fantacized about how they would look tightly bound and gagged (and knew thay would never go for it). And so it goes.
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I love the new Interests section! I can put down all the things I like and how much and how good I am at them, and not have to write it all out by hand. Read my list of Interests; you will find it very accurate and carefully thought out. If my interests coincide with your interests, you should definitely contact me if interested.
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| Age: 21 |
| North Arlington,
New Jersey |
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