The Photos I Don't Have

I’ve done Fetish Photography for years.  It started almost 7 years ago.  I was in corporate position, and I wanted to explore.  Being behind the camera was a great way for me to have the experience of exploring without the emotional risk.  I did other types of exploring as well… but the photography was close to my heart.

I wish now that I had begged for photos for my portfolio.  But I wanted people to be comfortable and this meant that they had complete control of their images.  Even now, if there is someone who doesn’t want me to have any of their images, then I won’t keep them. 

The images exist in my memory though. 

-The feeder and his girlfriend– who weighed more than 500 pounds… and the chocolate cake.  I was amazed at how sexual those pictures were.  

-The two men I’ve labeled in my head as the dance couple, as they posed wearing nothing (and I do mean absolutely nothing) but tutus and smiles. 

-I’ve taken a LOT of photos of feminization.  I love those shoots, especially where I can do process shoots.  Most of the time, the Femmes that I have known have had a bit of vanity- so they only allowed me to shoot their photo after they were done.  They wanted images that were carefully posed and crafted to make strong men reflect an image of Post-War glamour.  But occassionally I would get someone who had a bit more something… and I remember the photograph of the line-backer putting on pantyhose and heels.  It was totally hot.  If he had been straight, I would propositioned him right then and there.  But I didn’t possess the necessary bits to make him happy, so I didn’t try.  (Yeah, I know I *do* have those bits, but the silicone ones don’t count for the gay boys.)

-Threesomes.  The only problem with shooting threesomes is that I have the policy where everyone has to approve the photos… I remember one shoot and one of the women was convinced that her middle name should be heifer.  She didn’t like any of the shots she was in because she saw round flesh… it was made harder for her because there was another woman in the pictures.  To give you an idea, the first one was about 5′3 or so and about 160/180.  The other one was 5′11 and 120, so she was all angles and ribs and whippet thin.  But we went through the images- and they all were vetoed and deleted.   A year later, she finally made peace with her body and wanted a memento from that night… and I had none.  When I hit delete, I clear the cashe and empty the recycle bin.  There is software that might have done something with the bits and pixels, but I didn’t have it. 

And other images as well… The picture that was supposed to be watersports, but she had a shy bladder… Oh god, that was awful.  I’m there, poised and ready. Her client (who was paying her for this) laying in the bathtub, waiting for the rivers to open and this poor girl sitting on the edge of the bathtub drinking glass after glass of water.  After an hour of waiting, he and I went out of the loo and within a second of us leaving we heard liquid hitting porclain.  I still giggle as I think of him charging back into the bathroom screaming “Don’t wipe! Don’t flush! Let me lick it off!”  I think they “dated” for several years, and she finally got to the point where she could pee on him just about anywhere.

Independent Porn Stills.  You may not know this, but when a movie is made, the still photos for that movie aren’t just where they stop the video.  A still photographer comes in and does the stills in between video takes.  Unfortunately for me, in between video takes is also when the star of our picture either tries to get in an extra line of coke, or the engeniu tries to wipe the come off.  The worst porn to do still shots for- Bukake… especially when they want stills of the “money shots,” which is a fancy way of saying they want photos of the girl dripping in come.  But like anything that drips, if a finite amount of a liquid substance is put over something, it will either drip away or dry up.  Neither is pretty, and neither makes for a good box cover.  FYI- you may not know this, but a number of companies make a come solution that makes up the difference if there isn’t enough ejaculate. Every single time I’ve been exposed to it, I can’t help but think that the fact come is really disgusing.. Just gross. It looks okay, but it smells foul and I can’t imagine how it tastes.  But apparently it doesn’t burn as much if you get it in your eye.  (No, I didn’t take photos of the porn shoot when she got come in her eye.  I am embarrassed to say that I did have to go find a quiet spot where I laughed until I cried.  I didn’t mean to laugh at her, but she was so indignant- mortified that there was come in her eye… like being naked in a DP porn shoot meant that wasn’t a hazard…

These are the photos I don’t have.  But the memories are entertaining.