Growing up and through most of my adult life I wrongly assumed men to be strong. 

I, thought for some reason, due to their size?... that they could "handle it".  I could share stories of things I went through, they could hear it and offer some help.

This was inaccurate ..and while I imagine in time I will understand and appreciate this...they didn't live through what I did...how could they possibly understand? 

Yet even those who lived through something similar seem to avoid and only run away, avoiding the subject or any subject really with some meat to it.

I have no interest in fair weather friends. 

I find it  incredibly difficult to tolerate the "pretending" that so many seem to need in order to maintain a relationship.

I am stronger than I ever thought for I have gone through things that so many could not handle and further more would have allowed to alter their lives in a negative way.

Most will not talk to me here and I get it....for as my husband says "they're not strong enough to be my man". ;)  (little reference to Sheryl Crow that apparently reminds him of me)

Nicely done. Nicely done, I say. This comment is directed to all males. Please don't read any further if your ego is too sensitive (as I find most men's to be). And why would you really?...this post will not prove to be entertaining, titillating or offer an opportunity to access any of my orifices, which is the main if not solitary goal of all men. 

It is true what they say "If I can't eat it, fuck it or ride it than I don't need it". Hmmm? Yes? If you have a cock and balls between your legs you should be nodding vigorously right now unless you're still lying to yourself that you truly have an interest in women where no sex is desired or possible.

I am completely and utterly sick of the lot of you. I've been around ...as in this is not my first lifetime....but clearly I must  have needed to see things from the woman's point of view to fully appreciate how incredibly single minded men are. No doubt I was just like all of you when I was a man. Seeing women for one purpose and one purpose only. Sure, I can be "friends" with you but...we're gonna have sex at some point, right? I love to talk to you...but this is leading somewhere, isn't it?

Ridiculous and rather pathetic, I'd say. 

May I apologize to any woman in a past life that I treated this way. I am sorry but you were so damn cute and curvy I couldn't see you had worth for anything but my selfish gratification. I do apologize. I should have seen all that you had to offer...what I could have gleaned from your presence....how enlightening your company. The man in me is already tired of this line of thinking. 

Are we gonna fuck or what?

The satyrs love ....I don't understand. .....I am alone so often due to his attention to his first love. His energies are funneled with great force into that place and that place alone. He is exhausted and I am left with something barely more than a shell. My anger looms...

I don't expect men to relate...nor for them to have the desire to...it just needed to be said.

Foreheads together, as always. Breathe and soft words. His trimmed mustache and goatee ever present in my mind...how they felt against my face...kissing...over and over...he knew me...I miss him...his taste...his sound...his smell...his desire for me. I think of his hand at the back of my neck pulling me to him...the kisses deeper , engulfing...all encompassing....his request...to make love to me....denied...due to some sense of what I could do. I still enjoy this memory immensely...even with the abiding ache.

The night ride home brought visions of a road trip down a dark country road. The street lights faded til there was nothing but dark. Once the eyes adjusted we saw only the moon upon a distant barn. Our thoughts flashed with hopes of what lies within as we drove on to our destination.  

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vE8V0E_QfbQ

Such a beautiful song....love it's sound....the meaning ...a bit different.