Isitbeforethee8

it has been a long time since I have been on here. Life has away intruding so that I have to take care of things  would it be strange to know that in my every day life I am forced to be Dominate I have to be to take care of those who depend on me. But I so long to submit but again because of the life I have i can not. Sad is it not to be trained at one time to be apprised slave devoted in every way to my One trained in domestic and the art of love making and a pain slut.It would be 11 years down the road away from every thing I loved in a di and alone but unable to do any thing about it.   I come here to write and to some times talk to others with in the life there is only two in my life who know how much I miss who I am. But neither can help me other then for one in a while talk to me one is a Dominate and one is submissive but today I am alone with in my mind and for a short while I open the cage door that the submissive stays in and for a short while she writes she can feel.I know I sort of speak of my submissive side as a third party but I feel her every day but I have to fight to live so she must remain in the back ground. So I started to think of that side of my self as a scared girl, as things got worst I started thinking of her as a self a part of me but a part I could not touch, then one night I sort of put her in a cage with in my mind so I could keep going on and so now I speak of her as a third party. But she and I are one and the same but that side can not be fulfilled so do not think me strange for this I had to learn to go on. and now I have people who depend on me and I have to be the one who is Dominate with a scared slave living in side my mind.some times like today I wish I had some one who I could go go to but it has been so long now. Is the submissiveness a part of me or just a memory could I still submit the way I use to I wonder about it. I can write it i remember how it feels I can describe it but can I still do it for real not some thing I will find out any time soon but just a thought running a round in my head as I write. well my along time is all most up soon I will be needed to get thing organised to get things done so I have to go for now  maybe some time I will again to have time to come here.  Be true to your self you only have one life peace and love out  

She felt the wind on her she was bound and waiting for him to return. Her hands behind her back the leash locked to a tree. Her naked body exposed to all of nature. The breeze was cool on her marks on her ass while she knelt on the grass and leaves. She did not know for how long he would be gone only that he would return. She looked around the camp site and saw the tent and every thing neat she had arranged every thing to his desire. He had set up the tent she had collected wood and set the stones for the fire. Set up the cooking pots. If any one was to look at it it was a normal camp site except for the whip that hung near the opening of the tent and the naked female chained with in the the camp site. Then memory of her whipping still so fresh and hot on her skin and in her mind. She had finshed setting up and had knelt to one side awaiting his instructions, but with out a word he had grab her kissed her lips so hard he bruised them and then flung her to the ground and said “belly hands above your head and feet crossed and stay “ she had complied as fast as she could and when she did she felt the kiss of his flogger on her and even if she cried out a little she never broke her position she tried not to wither to much and take what he gave her. The need of her wild Master who needed to return to the wild side of him self to get back to being in nature. He laid his flogger with out restraint to her soft flesh. When he was done he grabbed her and leashed her to the tree and tied her hands behind her and got in to his truck and drove off. She was scared but knew he would return to her. And it was not to long before she heard the truck returning. She straightened how she was kneeling but bowed her head. She heard him get out of the truck but did not look up. She knew he was moving a round the camp he came to her and undid her hands and took off the least but the collar stayed. She knew it would. He caressed her ran he hands on her over her breast and ass feeling what was his. She could not help but melt in to his touch she was a slave she could not help the way she responded nor did she want to. With a slight push and a swat to her inflamed ass he sent her to cooking for her. He sat to watch her watching his naked slave start a fire and and cook for him feeling more relaxed then he had ina long time he let him self watch her how her body moved her breast hanging while she bent over the curve of her ass her neck with his collar on it her long hair flowing down her back her legs flexing as she bent over and moved from kneeling to standing. Till she had cooked his dinner ad brought it to him kneeling before him to hand it to him he would have rather feasted on her but he had time he could wait. He started to eat she did not make her self a plate nor would she unless he had told her to. But she did look loving in to his eyes while she handed him his plate he took a few bites and then handed her a bite from his plate by his hand and she took it from him gently with her lips letting them cress his fingers every so gently when she did. Her tongue licked her lips tasting the stake on her lips with her pink tongue he watched her and fed her another bite watching her ever time and she carefully ate what he fed her. From the stake to the roasted potatoes making each bite as sensual as she could wanting to please him with every thing she did for him. When he has finished eating he had her take the late away and then come to him and kneel be side him he touched her gently as his hand came to her breast he pinched her nipples harder and harder until she gasped but she still did not move. “ please me with your mouth “ she bent to his zipper with her teeth and slowly started to pull the zipper down and undid his belt and she shrived as she touched it knowing how it felt on her naked skin, she reached her hand in and rubbed his cock pulling it out as she brought her mouth to the tip she kissed it as she had been taught before she was to lick him before she did any thing she was to kiss the head deeply and loving her lips soft and yielding to his hardness she started to lick the head. Letting her tongue lick over it feeling it get wet closing her lips over the head as she sucks it deeper in to her mouth feeling it fill her mouth she loves to feel her Master in her the hardness filling her. all the way to her mouth she pushes deeper and feels him throbbing deep in her her tongue moving over the shaft and he takes a deep breath and takes his cock all the way feeling her though open to take him in her she moves her mouth up and down and licking an sucking taking him deeply keeping her tongue ever moving as she raises and lower her mouth on his cock her mouth is so wet so hot so slick and it caresses and sucks it way up and down his shaft to the head stopping at he head every time to kiss it deeply and back again to the very depths of her mouth to the tightness soft her mouth to feel her swallow as she holds him tightly in her her hand rubbing and caressing his balls his balls getting wet from the drippings of her mouth and she pleases him as she gives him all of her self in ever action he can feel her striving and pushing and not just sucking his cock but making love to it with her mouth to feel her so engulf in to her actions so in to just his pleasure. After a ½ hour of her sucking and licking him bring him up and down one a roller coaster of pleasure he grabs her by the hair and pulls her off with a pop form her mouth and throws her to her knees and he pushes her head down raising her still pink ass and as he slaps it a few more times he grabs her hips and plunges in to her hot wet pussy so tight as if it was meant to fit only him he drives in to her holding her hips and trust felling her build with every thrust “ not yet my sweet “ she cry’s out and her walls start pressing on him even more making her even tighter he can feel her shaking under his hand with the desire she is feeling knowing this inflames him even more with every thrust he takes her he owns her owns every part of her her cry’s and heat her pleasure the thoughts drive him even harder as he take what is his he can hold back no long and dose not want to he yells NOW as he lets go and fill her with his essence and feels her thrashing on him tightening and cumming as hard as he is giving her self every party of her self to him at his command he pushes her down and lays on top of her while both come down to earth. She feels the leaves and grass beneath but she is complete being with her One her Master. He pulls away from her and brings her up with him as he stands and instructs her to clean up the camp for the night. He loves to watch her walk shaking and still with in the throws of her cumming as she cleans up the food. Putting every thing away. And then standing before him awaiting him. He pulls her in to his arms and holds her tightly loving her for all she has given him. And he leads her in to the tent for a rest they both need and desire. one slave One Master for one night living as it should be. The world is right at this moment and as it should be for both of them any other couple so desires this completeness of them self’s.

so many out there seek to find the one they can hold and so many out here seek the one to hold them to be true to them self's if this give you pleasure reading it please let me know this is now how I find my lost life by writing and please others while they read it love to all peace out     

life is  strange it gave me my self at a young age and then made it so i could not have it when i am older. Why is that  why am I so alone and so scared to step out of my cage that I have build around me. I am always around peaple but always feel alone I talk to peaple but I feel no one hears the real me.