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About GSoumis
I’m going to kick off this profile by saying that the most important thing to me is health: health of mind, health of body. If you don’t have your health, you don’t have anything. Health is freedom, health is wealth. Illness is imprisonment (true bondage) and poverty.
Many people are ill in body because they eat junk and don’t exercise. They speak of consuming toxins such as food with sugar and alcohol ‘in moderation’ because everything ‘in moderation’ is fine. Really? Well what about cocaine and heroine? Is that okay in moderation? Nothing toxic is okay in moderation, and we all know this anyway. Everyone knows junk food is bad for you, but just like the smoker reaches for the packet of cigarettes with ‘this will kill you’ written on it, so the person who cannot stop eating junk food because of a compulsive urge to eat it is in self denial: and that is the priniciple thing which keeps us ill: blocking things out and denying things. Admitting the truth is the first stage to a healthier state of being.
There are other forms of self denial and blocking things out such as denying our real feelings although they are very strong. I denied my feelings of wanting to submit to women for a long, long time, thinking I was weird/perverse. Well, maybe I am but I cannot help having the feelings I have and the more I resisted them the stronger they became and the more compulsive they became. In the end I decided to see professional dommes and try to open up and experience what had always been fantasy. In some ways I regret taking that route; in other ways it was one of the best forms of medicine I have ever known because it enabled me to get a grip on a set of hitherto uncontrolled and unrealised feelings that were rocking my life unbelievable and almost out of control – leaving me utterly disempowered. I get the urge to submit to women still, but it is no longer out of control, I can observe the feelings, be conscious of them and know them/admit them. But they no longer take over so to speak.
I have learned to become empowered and free in relation to junk food, drugs and sugar etc. I have stopped denying their effect on my health and ‘realised’ a way of being healthier physically; and I have also stopped denying feelings that I hitherto regarded as perverse and come to terms with them/learnt about them and ultimately have a better state of mental health (I believe) than I had hitherto.
I think that engaging in D/s or BDSM with another person can be a very liberating and dare i say it ‘healthy’ experience, because you can be true and openly express yourself. But It can also be a mentally ‘unhealthy’ experience where it becomes a poison also just like drugs; and destroy a person’s mental health (I have experienced that also). I am not interested in the destructive aspect of this lifestyle – let me say this up front. To those reading this who think what I am saying is dull, boring/uninteresting/extreme/limiting. I know that mode of being and it doesn't go anywhere, you just end up staying trapped and going around in circles: been there done that, got t-shirt so to speak; and it is the accusations launched at those trying to transcend a condition of suppression/repression of being dull and boring and so forth that pulls them back down and means they never glimpse the land beyond. I know about the so called 'exciting' and 'wreckless' pleasures that many insist on as being the 'essence' of living - that is what I was born into. I found myself saying 'is this it?'.
What about exploring your feelings? What about finding out who you are with other people; instead of just conforming to what everyone else says you 'should' be doing. Even the BDSM or D/s scene has become an arena with a set of 'norms' to conform to. Somehow we humans have managed to convert what should be a secret garden for people to explore the real forces within their own souls into a set of dogmatic roles and rituals to conform to; where a slave/sub is not a real slave/sub unless he does x,y,z or a Domme is not a real Domme unless she does a,b,c. Yes I'm sure I look into things too much, think too much, take things too seriously, blah, blah, blah - yes I've heard all that before too. Still, D/s is not about sitting around and thinking, it is about openly exploring real feelings you have with others through interaction; so that you can be yourself - yes we as human beings can really offer each other that opportunity: isn't that just so dull, boring and uninteresting? Why don't we get on with the far more exciting business of damaging each other's health and keeping each other locked in addictive oppressive/suppressive cycles.... and the possibility of the flowering of your own soul: of opening up through interaction with another human being by openly revealing your dark side and letting it come out safely and sanely as a very real part of your being - that is pretty dull too isn't it? Isn't that just sooooo borrring.... far too intellectual and spiritual, can't we just carry on beating the crap out of each other and getting money, thrills, spills and a world of ills - after all that's so much more interesting isn't it? Yawn, I think I'd rather read a dictionary. Yes I'm intellectual (but an illitarate pleb compared to Einstein), spiritual (and an immoral atheist compared to Buddha) and dare to think and feel and I'm proud of it because that is what being human is about damn it; and If I 'really' have any interaction to do with anyone it is so that their humanity can flower too. As for this mundane, materialistic, suppressed/repressed scene of escapist fantasy which is nothing other than another means of keeping us all unrealised - bog off! Amen to that. |
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Male Dominant, 40, Antwerp
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Male Switch, 22, greensboro, North Carolina
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Male Dominant, 27, Greensboro, North Carolina
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Male Dominant, 42, Greensboro, North Carolina
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Male Dominant, 48, Greensboro, North Carolina
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Male Switch, 44, Greensboro, North Carolina
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Male Dominant, 50, Greensboro, North Carolina
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Female Submissive, 55, Los Angeles, Georgia
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Male Submissive, 46, Greensboro, North Carolina
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Male Dominant, 51
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Male Switch, 26, Greensboro, North Carolina
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Male Submissive, 40, Winston Salem, North Carolina
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