fishie

We're calling it "consideration" but it really just means we don't live together. i came out of a bad breakup, and we don't want to jump into something so quickly we don't have time to make sure it's right.

my Lady says she likes the term "consideration" because it is a consideration period for both of us. We're examining the relationship and deciding if it is right for us. Also, though, we've known each other and been play partners for 2 years before entering a pre-24/7 relationship, neither of us has been in a TPE relationship with the other, so how can we know it works. She says that it's not Her considering me but a mutual consideration.

She is teaching me to express my needs, and deciding if they fit with Her desires. my Lady wants to confirm that our needs actually match. i don't dictate to her what i will do, i simply express who i am. She decides if who i am can be shaped to who She wants me to be.

i suppose i am, in some ways, coming in and telling Her what i want, but only because She has specifically asked me to tell her that. She says that if She doesn't know my wants, She can't know when to provide and when to withhold.

i think that's what consideration is, to an extent. It's two people deciding if their mutual, hard-needs match each others, then one choosing to give up volition, after knowing that she has expressed those needs, and they have been taken into account.