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well since this is a journal and the theme is bdsm i thought exploring some of the actual experiances i have had may help bring some focus to mind... i remember when i was 19 i met a sweet girl who very much liked to be controlled...unfortunately she was living with a guy and we sort of drifted from harmless chat at work to adultry...i still feel badly about that as it caused alot of emotional trouble for everyone...however that being said the sex was awesome...i remember i kept trying to end things and she kept offering me experiances i could not resist...i wish i had not run away as we could of been soul mates...
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