I am normally a pretty dominant person. I was listed as a Domme on this site for years with my husband. We are separated, pending divorce, now and I am interested in learning more about being a sub. But there are definite stipulations.
I am by personality, a dominant. Kinda one of those alpha people who like to do extreme sports (when I can)and can be pretty assertive in my day to day dealings. But part of that is the need to experience more variety and harder or different things, including sexual. Giving up control has always been difficult for me. I used to be pretty prideful about never ever giving over any control of my person to another. But once I realized that it was nothing more than another fear to conquer, the idea started to excite me. So I have this need to never let something I fear have power over me but also I feel compelled to push myself always, physically, mentally, spiritually. I need to always go further, do more, advance and achieve. I tend to be really grounded in the physical so I focus a lot on my body. (like running an extra mile after I think I cant go further) I have stories and when or if I get to know you I am happy to tell them. I notice that it doesnt work for me, I dont get excited or feel remotely submissive, unless the person I am with is exceptionally dominant and there is some kind of connection between us (like, attraction, respect, trust, admiration and dare I say love). But to be honest I have never subbed for anyone yet, so who knows how it will go. I am a person who has an extremely high tolerance for pain and absolutely no shame. I might be, as one friend has said, a tough nut to crack. SO maybe I have been wrong all these years and all I have ever needed was the right Dom. or Domme. Who knows.
I'm not sure I want to be submissive all the time, I think it may not be in my nature. It is just a new experience I want to have. Something more to learn about myself and maybe to grow from. I doubt I will ever want to sub 24/7. I think this will just be a fun experience in which I will learn a great deal about myself as well as have some intensely erotic experiences and that, for me, is what life is all about.
So for the moment, I want to hit some parties, meet some people and get into the scene.
I am considering finding a house boy. Or girl.
Packing tonight and tomorrow, moving Wednesday. Free pizza and beer to any who help. Message me here. ;)
