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| Submissiveness is inate. It's not a choice. I am proud and comfortable with this aspect of myself. I'm just not comfortable with the submissive I have been or become. In my defense, I recognise it and know that there's many facets of myself that I personally need to work on. "It is not the strongest of the species that survives but the ones most adaptable to change"
This sub craves to have her boundaries pushed in all aspects of life. In short, I need an experienced, patient trainer. Not a play partner, cos for me, a symbiotic D/s relationship is a means to mutual personal growth and overcoming fear and self doubt. Oh Yes, the BSDM play is super fun but is only a small part of the relationship I need. Commitment breeds intimacy and trust, therefore the depth of experience will follow.
So why haven't I met the right Dom before when I so clearly claim to know what I want?
1) Denial (years and years of this) - that I was a sub at all and that being so wasn't a weakness.
2) Stubbornness (not to be confused with uncompromising)- a strong personality which takes an equally strong/ or stronger character to stand up to me. Although, i am quick to be the first to back down on an argument for the sake of peace. If the issue is never addressed and I am the victim of a unjust accusation, it will fester. Another aspect of myself, I acknowledge needs worked upon.
3) Skepticism- to my advantage, I have been blessed with an inbuilt state-of-the-art bullshit detector. But don't let that scare you, if you are a genuine Dom, I'm quick to see it.
4) Location- there are family obligations tying me to NI and they are unlikely to change anytime soon. Any fulltime Master/slave relationship that develops, will have to be located from my home, close to Belfast.
5) Impatience and impetulance - I've been told frequently, I engage my mouth before my brain.
6) High standards- I cannot submit to anyone I feel is intellectually inferior or lacks clarity of judgement.
With all the above factors, this makes my odds of finding
What do I have that makes me the perfect sub for You, my possible future Master....?
1) Honesty- "Honesty has a beautiful and refreshing simplicity about it. No ulterior motives. No hidden meanings. An absence of hypocrisy, duplicity, political games, and verbal superficiality. As honesty and real integrity characterize our lives, there will be no need to manipulate others."--Chuck Swindoll
Both partners in a relationship need honesty to build a foundation of trust. This is not exclusive to the BSDM community.
2)Hedonistic- a total thrill seeker. In the past, I haven't always choosen the most constructive outlets for this. I love my control taken and being shoved out of my comfort zone to overcome the fear of personal growth. We WILL have fun.
3) Loyal- Where a good Dom leads, I will gladly follow. Emphasis on "good".
4) Sense of Humour- no seriously, I do
5) Submissive intelligence- not intellectually super smart but the having the ability to know my Dom inside out. Under a good teacher, I am a first class pupil, A firm boss, an excellent PA, A strict coach, an athlete, For an artist, a muse. There is nothing more I want than to make my Dominant proud.
There's plenty more strings to my bow. I may as well take up a little more of your time listing a few more seeing you've taken the time to read this far, afterall this IS more important to me than any job interview. Tenacity, leggy, insightful, open, creative, curious, brave, incredibly affectionate and I smile and bruise easily.
So how do you train a disobedient sub?
If you have the answers and the inclination, please get in touch.
PS: this is not me in the picture. It is a representation of the slave I wish to become.
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